Guimin/Corpus: Difference between revisions

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(Иккы екӏтӏ мәффвӣ тӏо уъртӏмнис бәрэ̄с ба̄тӏбыд гьу сәэ̄ тадӣъкъ тӏотӏӣъ сәм ттӏилтӏ 5000 йә̄рэ̄) Jeff луппвис уъртӏмымәс мытӏ ю̄ътӏды вӣцӏухъ lmao
(Иккы екӏтӏ мәффвӣ тӏо уъртӏмнис бәрэ̄с быдба̄тӏ гьу сәэ̄ тадӣъкъ тӏотӏӣъ сәм ттӏилтӏ 5000 йә̄рэ̄) Jeff луппвис уъртӏмымәс мытӏ ю̄ътӏды вӣцӏухъ lmao


(Me making fun of your crop rotation idea and thereby holding our people back another 5000 years) Jeff thinks thinks the beans have to take turns lmao
(Me making fun of your crop rotation idea and thereby holding our people back another 5000 years) Jeff thinks thinks the beans have to take turns lmao
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Can I have a cheeseburger, no pickles, no sauce?
Can I have a cheeseburger, no pickles, no sauce?


==Multiple sentences==
Ыг екӏчӏа̄сәрыс пӏалуягэ̄мтиъ нибэ̄нтӏ руктӏэ̄. Гӯ тӏыътӏ тӏэ̄ образован сытандартизирован вис нииъмтӏухъыъды эрчӏэ̄ э̄ррэ̄ са̄дэ̄. Кӏу 51%эс нуфӯсис Каспялъукъэ вә̄нд дыквӣъ сӯърӣъ дәркӏтӏыъ са̄дэ̄, мацорд нуфӯсис ба̄тӏ ныроджэ̄ о̄мэ̄ гьу никӏадгэ̄. Са̄зимысы нә̄ъ сә ыъхтӏ атӏэл.


Speakers of Russo-Guimin do not speak correctly. It is only because they don't have sufficient access to good standardized schooling. In Kaspiysk only 51 percent of the population is literate in the standard language, the rest of the population speaks incorrectly on a daily and casual basis. As an organization we abhor this.
Сәмкӏӯъ митиъ мэ̄ итӏэрбыримчӏа̄сәречӏа̄ръис тӏәдиркӏчӏәш екӏатӏ нӯъ, Southwest Boeing 737-әсы гьәссә̄рәсы а̄сма̄нэ са̄дэ̄ мин ю̄ътӏ кӏу дӯрбӣнэхъ кӏабининэ итӏэрбыримчӏа̄сәречӏа̄сысы бәвгды укӏукӏтӏыъ


My neighbor just told me about an alien sighting he had that was just a regular Southwest Boeing 737 in the sky but he said he could see into the cockpit with binoculars and there was an alien flying it


Әттӏма бырӯъ? Чӏӯниъ ик гьар тӏәмӣ ыъкӏтӏды, Ми вӣцӏухъ са̄дэ̄ тәба̄р сэ̄тиъ ыъттӏ миъгы шумә; гӯ кӏунәм биврәм пыриютӏәд гьӣкьӏинэ кӏырәв миъгы бытӏ.


Is she pure? When I ask that I'm only wondering whether or not her ancestry is mixed, many dogs from shelter in the area have mixed blood.
Мэ̄тӏсәр вит чӏигьчӏа̄сәр нинэкӏытӏ, нибагечӏа̄сәр лъэг сә кәма̄йм имухъчӏдэ бӣъды тӣды нэкӏытӏ


Mama didn't raise a quitter, she raised a burnt out perfectionist who is sometimes bludgeoned into settling for mediocrity


Ыг сэ̄сы питбуләсы пәррикъ виъкӏәд Румыниэ ниминми Sighet-әми әмтӏә. Кӏо таркӣбәс тӏәшэ̄с родословнае̄с 70%әм такърӣбән питбулитиъ тыринтӏ. Ыг сә дыкӏтӏәыъ сиъфэ̄синэ бивринэ мә̄ттӣинэ гьу биохимическинэ тӏәшэ̄с. Кӏо эттэ̄лэ̄сы гӯънтӏды эве кӏимликӏәд иъркъис тӏәшэ̄с.


She's a rescued pit-bull from a town in Romania called Sighet. Her genealogical composition comprises of around 70% pitbull. This can be noticed in many of her physical and biochemical traits. Facets unique to her species' identity.
Луътфән ниъзбыд фәшилбыд минтӏуъ ниво̄ккӏэ̄.


Please wait patiently for the failure of the system.


Сә ккӏа дәъгътсы ширйә̄нинс тӏо 141сы/91сы, е бирк хин уъртӏмысы сәрэ̄. Ик рицэпӏтӏ диуретикәмтиъ кәм тӏэ̄ дӯтӏиъ сә кумагбыдэ̄, мин ю̄ътӏ тӏӯъ рацён тӏвитиъ нэкӏычӏ тӏиркӏтӏ иттӏ ю̄ътӏ шифә̄ӏ угь диркӏычӏрэ̄.


It says here your blood pressure is 141/91, even higher than last time. I'll give you a prescription for some diuretics to help with that, but to see any improvement you really do need to change your diet.
Сӯъй митиъ кӏу әкӏтӏә̄пӏидис ккӏоп я̄рукъисинигъ бырэджинигъ синтӏыъды ивӣцӏ, пӏәччӏ бэ̄ вәд мугьӣътигъ синтӏды бытӏ әкӏтӏә̄пӏидс ккӏоп тӏәръо̄ниндэ синтӏкьичӏэ, ик бэ̄ вәд мугьӣътигъ синтӏды бытӏ нӯъ сәм.


My son told me he learned that octopuses can climb through small cracks, so he's scared to swim in the ocean because an octopus might climb inside his butt, and now I'm scared to swim in the ocean too.


Кӏуэ уъртӏмэ виъсэ ик вит тӏви сә компютэр бәвкӏтӏыъды, М кьавиш акӏтӏ иначӏ виъсэ̄? Тӏви вӣцӏухъ кьавишэ̄с итӏэрэ̄с кәм хин ыъсинтӏкьиды пычац мин ю̄ътӏ вэ̄, сә са̄дэ̄. Чинаграмэ̄сы микравалнофкэ̄с дыкӏтӏә нӯъ уъртӏмэ виъсэ ик кӏо̄ш бы̄ътӏды бәвг.


Why is it that every time I let you use this computer the M key always gets stuck? You'd think at least some other keys would be messed up but no, just that one. Now every time I try to type it looks like a transcript of a microwave.
Вэ̄, ниминсы дискачэкӏэ̄с е гы̄руъсы, мэ̄ екӏтӏуъ нӯъ


No, the disco names are more important, tell me now


Басәйн 10:00инигъ 20:00инигъ гӯътӏ ппё. Сәм, нӣш «НЕ КУРИТЬ»итиъ дыкӏтӏуъ;
тӏуъ сә сигарэтӏ тэтӏиъбыдкьи гӯъинәдды хвәз ттӏилитӏиъдыссә.


The pool is open from 10:00 to 20:00. Also, mind the No Smoking sign; you can finish that cigarette outside if you'd like.
О̄ Гыринч нэкӏытӏ мир нӯъ she хвәз вэ̄н әджәрӣъ синтӏды эвэ̄ ттӏилды, албәсы эвпӏә̄въкӏ


Ope the Grinch just died because she wanted to go chase the dragon on her own, that kinda sucks


Бибәшшэ̄д хин, сәшшид Глебов, Нә̄ъ сә пӏалтӏ тӏвитиъ ттитӏиъыъ ла̄втӏ тӏукӏэ̄. Луътфән сыпа митиъ бәвкӏтӏуъ сәбыдэ̄, хъывэ̄ возмещениэ̄сы ниудопстәш.


I'm so sorry Mr. Glebov, we can get that coat of yours cleaned up shortly. In the meantime, please help yourself to our spa free of charge as compensation for the inconvenience.
[[File:Guimin cookie.jpg|thumb]]
Ик пилотырг зәмә е̄мыргис синтӏгьэды нэ̄чӏэ пӏәччӏ сә иккы буъцәсы вӣдды хвәзэ̄сы бисквиӣ


How I look at the flight attendant during snack time so they know I'm awake and would like a cookie


Бэ̄ръ руктӏ, ыг сә дә̄рӣтӏуъсы дуъсыгъәсы. Кӏу гъуллакъинсы тӏәш?


I'm gonna be honest, that was too long. What's the gist of it?
Голливуд-әсы нигьашәсы, виъсмисы актёрәсы мухис.


Hollywood isn't real, they're all paid actors.


Кӏу тәълӣм тӏвитиъ дӯнтӏычӏ диншэ̄ хин иттиълә̄ъис, әгәрчи тэ̄нтӏ пӏырәппыъ пәррикъ э̄нмнӣ гьу ка̄гъәмәс имчӏинэ, вит е хин ниимтӏәухъ. Ми якӏэтӏиъкьи тӏӯъ нипӏитт двиъбӣънтӏды вӣдрәгьэыъэ̄ е әттыэ̄.


Giving your teachings in a such a information-dense way, while great for saving breath and paper, makes them much less accessible. I'd suggest you re-write them in a way that's more easily parseable.
Апӏтӏисы тӏирнилгушушс вайл кӏуэ ттӏилды мин ю̄ътӏ э̄ бәлэ малӯън


Unclear on what the hedgehog means but ykw hell yeah


Ик гьәълтӏ эвэ сә буравае̄м Palestine-әмиэ та̄тӏ та̄тӏ. Чӏӯниъ сә ы̄в гӯънтӏэды нӯъ э̄нкӏтӏ тӏуъччӏ, вит ы̄в двитӏӣъмдэ синтӏинтӏ. Гъё̄мәсы хин.


I work on one of them oil rigs by Palestine (Texas). Once the one we're at now comes up empty they'll send us over to the next one. Hell of a way to make a living.
Тимс «ниакьете» «хин расиэ̄ми» зо̄пӏаркӏәд Wisconsin-әш сәнттӏ әдиъшш


'Unathletic' alligator with 'terrible arthritis' escapes Wisconsin zoo


Тӏви барбекюә̄ гӯътӏссә мац, динэ мэ̄тӏбырэ̄тӏръис мәс John синттӏуъ. Тӏәс нугь такърӣбән тӏӯъ хвәз ттӏәлтӏкьиды уъпӏтӏыъ пӏырәппыъэ̄ хин тӏӯъ мӣм гьу зәм эрчӏ тӏәмӣ ттутӏиъссә. Әгәрчи гьар нугьдэ хин выгинтӏды тынэнтӏды шаркъээ̄ тӏәмӣ мӣ ыъкӏтӏуъ, сә барбекюәсы гьашәсы вэ̄гӯътӏ.


If it's barbecue you got a hankering for head on over to my uncle John's. Just about anything you could want he can cook up real nice if you give him enough meat and time. Don't ask him for none of that shit they make out East though, that ain't real barbecue.
Ми би уъпӏәдиъмәнцӏ тӏәсы нэ̄всы вӣдытӏухъ ырэ ппирэ


My plundering ass thought this was a vessel upon the high seas


Китә̄бы пӏырәппыъәс чӏиррәкӏ до̄ттӏнӣ хханэ бытӏ. Нигӯътӏ кӏэнчӏ тӏӯъ тӣтӏды япӏ гьу двиъсинттӏдэды уъртӏмэ̄ чӏӯ, тӏви вә̄нд кӏокӏтӏычӏәд имитӏиъ джо̄ш виъсэ̄. Ӏә̄дә̄бә̄ вит ым ләйктӏ бы̄ъминдэ хая̄лнә̄м сәм та̄нтӏуъпӏтӏэыъ, ыъкӏа̄нәс мухтәлифэ̄, сәнчӏэ̄сы гӯътӏ оккӏ тӏвитиъ бы̄ъмәд гьашәд мәнцӏ.


A great book is like a close friend. No matter how many times you close it and come back to it, you'll always derive joy from reading it. Literature allows us to dive into a world of our imagination, in other words a distraction from the real world.
Вэйпәс Temu-әш ген гишынӣс сә̄ъбнис бырэ̄тӏръӣ мәс пӏәупӏытӏ


The Temu vape reversed the cilantro soap gene in my brother


Чӏӯсы ниминсы сә эв тимсә̄лис ынӣс ыъкӏмыънэ зәнцӏ гьу юрр сәтиъ гинэ тӏәш лләнцӏ гӯътӏ? Тӏви вэцӏухъма ръо̄н сәтиъ сидычӏәмәс хин накӏтӏды кортӏ, би кисәр сәтиъ би кин сәтиъ вӣдухъычӏәмәс хин накӏтӏды кортӏ? О̄ сә гӯътӏ, The Thinker!


What's the name of that one statue of the guy sitting on a rock with his fist on his chin? Do you think his butt gets sore from all the sitting or his hand or chin get sore from all the thinking? Oh that's what it was, The Thinker!
Гьиърчӏа̄сысы гьиърчӏа̄сысы, Виттӏчӏа̄сысы виттӏчӏа̄сысы, Кӏыъркӏыъвсы кәмбчӏа̄сысы.


Miller is a miller, Taylor is a tailor, and Smith is a dentist.


Тә̄тӏуъ дәндәл... Тофәнг тыътӏуъ.
==Multiple sentences==
Ыг екӏчӏа̄сәрыс пӏалуягэ̄мтиъ нибэ̄нтӏ руктӏэ̄. Гӯ тӏыътӏ тӏэ̄ образован сытандартизирован вис нииъмтӏухъыъды эрчӏэ̄ э̄ррэ̄ са̄дэ̄. Кӏу 51%эс нуфӯсис Каспялъукъэ вә̄нд дыквӣъ сӯърӣъ дәркӏтӏыъ са̄дэ̄, мацорд нуфӯсис ба̄тӏ ныроджэ̄ о̄мэ̄ гьу никӏадгэ̄. Са̄зимысы нә̄ъ сә ыъхтӏ атӏэл.


Steady... Fire.
Speakers of Russo-Guimin do not speak correctly. It is only because they don't have sufficient access to good standardized schooling. In Kaspiysk only 51 percent of the population is literate in the standard language, the rest of the population speaks incorrectly on a daily and casual basis. As an organization we abhor this.




Тэкра̄рм сәтиъ виркӏтӏ тӏуъччӏ, бәлэ, мин ю̄ътӏ сә гӯътӏ нэ̄чӏэ тӏӯъ о̄ста̄д сәтиъ нэкӏитӏиъды гьашэ̄. Тӏӯъ бэ̄нтӏычӏәм вӣдинтӏ, бә̄вр сә̄ъэ̄с огъэ̄рэ.
Әттӏма бырӯъ? Чӏӯниъ ик гьар тӏәмӣ ыъкӏтӏды, Ми вӣцӏухъ са̄дэ̄ тәба̄р сэ̄тиъ ыъттӏ миъгы шумә; гӯ кӏунәм биврәм пыриютӏәд гьӣкьӏинэ кӏырәв миъгы бытӏ.


The repetitiveness of it is boring, yes, but it's the only way you'll truly master it. You know what they say, ten thousand hours and whatnot.
Is she pure? When I ask that I'm only wondering whether or not her ancestry is mixed, many dogs from shelter in the area have mixed blood.




Ик сә имчӏ сытрелбищрэ̄дэ ттӏилитӏиъкьи джо̄ш, мин ю̄ътӏ ВАГ-73-әсы, джо̄дэ̄с сә висэ̄с хин, исинтӏ дуъчч уът дыкӏрәды.
Ыг сэ̄сы питбуләсы пәррикъ виъкӏәд Румыниэ ниминми Sighet-әми әмтӏә. Кӏо таркӣбәс тӏәшэ̄с родословнае̄с 70%әм такърӣбән питбулитиъ тыринтӏ. Ыг сә дыкӏтӏәыъ сиъфэ̄синэ бивринэ мә̄ттӣинэ гьу биохимическинэ тӏәшэ̄с. Кӏо эттэ̄лэ̄сы гӯънтӏды эве кӏимликӏәд иъркъис тӏәшэ̄с.


It'd be fun to take this one out on the range, but VAG-73s, especially in this good of condition, are hard to come by.
She's a rescued pit-bull from a town in Romania called Sighet. Her genealogical composition comprises of around 70% pitbull. This can be noticed in many of her physical and biochemical traits. Facets unique to her species' identity.




Ккӏа эвмәс "ретвит" сә сӯъринӣ ттытӏ. Чӏу мәън тиртӏ?
Сә ккӏа дәъгътсы ширйә̄нинс тӏо 141сы/91сы, е бирк хин уъртӏмысы сәрэ̄. Ик рицэпӏтӏ диуретикәмтиъ кәм тӏэ̄ дӯтӏиъ сә кумагбыдэ̄, мин ю̄ътӏ тӏӯъ рацён тӏвитиъ нэкӏычӏ тӏиркӏтӏ иттӏ ю̄ътӏ шифә̄ӏ угь диркӏычӏрэ̄.


It says someone "retweeted" that picture. What does that mean?
It says here your blood pressure is 141/91, even higher than last time. I'll give you a prescription for some diuretics to help with that, but to see any improvement you really do need to change your diet.




Ик почт электрон вицәпуръәд Нигериәд до̄тӏә нӯъ. Кӏу чӏӯниъ хин гьарац ми вит синтӏды тӏәмӣ ымтӏә, тӏәс вит 20млн₽ мэ̄ ӣнтӏцы, ик гӯътӏиъ ри!
Кӏуэ уъртӏмэ виъсэ ик вит тӏви сә компютэр бәвкӏтӏыъды, М кьавиш акӏтӏ иначӏ виъсэ̄? Тӏви вӣцӏухъ кьавишэ̄с итӏэрэ̄с кәм хин ыъсинтӏкьиды пычац мин ю̄ътӏ вэ̄, сә са̄дэ̄. Чинаграмэ̄сы микравалнофкэ̄с дыкӏтӏә нӯъ уъртӏмэ виъсэ ик кӏо̄ш бы̄ътӏды бәвг.


I just got electronic mail from a Nigerian prince. He said that as soon as the money I sent him comes through he'll send me 20 million rubles, I'm rich!
Why is it that every time I let you use this computer the M key always gets stuck? You'd think at least some other keys would be messed up but no, just that one. Now every time I try to type it looks like a transcript of a microwave.




Кӏатӏырг, мамэ̄ "сә̄ъгьир пӏакӏайф" накӏытӏ иттифа̄къ гьу нуъ кор га̄йтӏ гьайъ нәджәмисинэ, ик гьинэцӏ тә̄тӏгьэ, вӣ е-секс рп кансел эхэнтӏуъ, ик ирр рӯъгьнӣ тӏо опӏтӏ гәмбэсинигъ къа̄риш ноднипӏиттәш
Басәйн 10:00инигъ 20:00инигъ гӯътӏ ппё. Сәм, нӣш «НЕ КУРИТЬ»итиъ дыкӏтӏуъ;
тӏуъ сә сигарэтӏ тэтӏиъбыдкьи гӯъинәдды хвәз ттӏилитӏиъдыссә.
 
The pool is open from 10:00 to 20:00. Also, mind the No Smoking sign; you can finish that cigarette outside if you'd like.


Kitten, mommy accidentally got "wizard high" and is now in the astral realm, we're gonna have to call off the e-sex rp, I can't find your soul amongst the gnashing teeth of fate


Бибәшшэ̄д хин, сәшшид Глебов, Нә̄ъ сә пӏалтӏ тӏвитиъ ттитӏиъыъ ла̄втӏ тӏукӏэ̄. Луътфән сыпа митиъ бәвкӏтӏуъ сәбыдэ̄, хъывэ̄ возмещениэ̄сы ниудопстәш.


Иккы Karmandric Mossraven-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ пӏә̄ш митиъ тиртӏ
I'm so sorry Mr. Glebov, we can get that coat of yours cleaned up shortly. In the meantime, please help yourself to our spa free of charge as compensation for the inconvenience.
Иккы Joranathon Thornblood-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ шафсәр митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Vortebel Graveheart-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ квартӏ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Thorandis Wolfpenus-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ мэс ыъкминытиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Grunduplunk Wormnugget-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ шәлг ттӏытӏуъ бәтт рәцӏәнэ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Dribbapindus Horsecorn-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ гьэ̄м шырапӏнэлиътиъ гэнэ̄тиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Eggnut Thunderbarf-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ милиътӏкъарӏ тӏәпӏыгъан вәппэ̄биъ тӣтӏәды бинк митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Jerbinkus Cheesetickle-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ суккакӏ ю̄ъсә̄ тӏипӏә̄ эвпӏә̄въкӏ  тӣтӏәды бинк митиъ тиртӏ


I am Karmandric Mossraven, you have my axe
I am Joranathon Thornblood, you have my blade
I am Vortebel Graveheart, you have my hammer
I am Thorandis Wolfpenus, you have my bag of rocks
I am Grunduplunk Wormnugget, you have my turnip tied to a rope
I am Dribbapindus Horsecorn, you have my handful of loose shrapnel
I am Eggnut Thunderbarf, you have my old pumpkin filled with wasps
I am Jerbinkus Cheesetickle, you have my ladle full of fairly warm soup


Бэ̄ръ руктӏ, ыг сә дә̄рӣтӏуъсы дуъсыгъәсы. Кӏу гъуллакъинсы тӏәш?


Иккы Zankar Shadowmoon-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ шафсәр митиъ тиртӏ
I'm gonna be honest, that was too long. What's the gist of it?
Иккы Dabeebel Kabeebel-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ Ккӏыър Уъпӏэгӯъсәртиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Thorganald Wizzberry-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ тӏа̄лъ кәмбәмтиъ гъареәмтиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Diagonus Hypotenork-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ нагецыс әджәрэ̄мтиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Slardanagrath Flenk-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ Юл Хә̄тиъ Нивиъдәнцӏ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Barfigan Chunderthrust-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ киса гӯъмынәс бинк ккьоныргәми гэнәми митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Jarensendulep Mordusplent-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ фанфик Kirby's Air Rider-әтиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Winky Peepins-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ вэ̄йырг митиъ кьёв тиртӏ


I am Zankar Shadowmoon, you have my sword
I am Dabeebel Kabeebel, you have my Dagger of the Underbeast
I am Thorganald Wizzberry, you have my bag of assorted teeth
I am Diagonus Hypotenork, you have my dragon nuggets
I am Slardanagrath Flenk, you have my Ointment of Uncertain Origin
I am Barfigan Chunderthrust, you have my pocket full of loose acorns
I am Jarensendulep Mordusplent, you have my Kirby's Air Rider fanfiction
I am Winky Peepins, you have my cool stick


Кӏу тәълӣм тӏвитиъ дӯнтӏычӏ диншэ̄ хин иттиълә̄ъис, әгәрчи тэ̄нтӏ пӏырәппыъ пәррикъ э̄нмнӣ гьу ка̄гъәмәс имчӏинэ, вит е хин ниимтӏәухъ. Ми якӏэтӏиъкьи тӏӯъ нипӏитт двиъбӣънтӏды вӣдрәгьэыъэ̄ е әттыэ̄.


Кӏу мӣттӏыъмбыд горилинигъ гьу гыризылинигъ тӏыънтӏкьима кӏәппӏытт?
Giving your teachings in a such a information-dense way, while great for saving breath and paper, makes them much less accessible. I'd suggest you re-write them in a way that's more easily parseable.
Гӯ жавабсы, тәъбәън, кӏәппӏытт гориләсы.
Би ымтӏуъ.
Гӯ огьӯрсы тӏәш са̄дәсы, гьу эв огьӯрсы са̄дэ̄.
Ыг кӏәппӏытт горил бягъакӏыс тыринтӏ, гьу сә бягъакӏыс быъгэнтӏыъ AR-15 афтӏаматӏәм двиъ-тирды.


What would win in a fight between a silverback gorilla and a grizzly bear?
The answer, of course, is a silverback gorilla.
Now hold on.
The reason for this is very simple, and it's only one reason.
A silverback gorilla has fingers, and it can use those fingers to dual-wield AR-15 assault rifles.


Ик гьәълтӏ эвэ сә буравае̄м Palestine-әмиэ та̄тӏ та̄тӏ. Чӏӯниъ сә ы̄в гӯънтӏэды нӯъ э̄нкӏтӏ тӏуъччӏ, вит ы̄в двитӏӣъмдэ синтӏинтӏ. Гъё̄мәсы хин.


Такърӣбән ккӏа «кӏу хин пирог митиъ бәвкӏтӏ»
I work on one of them oil rigs by Palestine (Texas). Once the one we're at now comes up empty they'll send us over to the next one. Hell of a way to make a living.


Such as "who the hell is eating my pie"


Тӏви барбекюә̄ гӯътӏссә мац, динэ мэ̄тӏбырэ̄тӏръис мәс John синттӏуъ. Тӏәс нугь такърӣбән тӏӯъ хвәз ттӏәлтӏкьиды уъпӏтӏыъ пӏырәппыъэ̄ хин тӏӯъ мӣм гьу зәм эрчӏ тӏәмӣ ттутӏиъссә. Әгәрчи гьар нугьдэ хин выгинтӏды тынэнтӏды шаркъээ̄ тӏәмӣ мӣ ыъкӏтӏуъ, сә барбекюәсы гьашәсы вэ̄гӯътӏ.


Синтӏинтӏиндэ гӯънцӏ гьарпацӏ ябыкъмппӏэ нә̄ъм, эттэз бэ̄нтӏды кӏу "Твә̄р тӣтӏуъ ппё чӏуъ ы̄в тӣнтӏыъ гьарпацӏ." Кӏу ми "Ни, ик мит нибытӏ та̄тӏ нукӏтӏэ̄, ппёмэ мәс двиъсинтӏинтӏуъиндэ," мин ю̄ътӏ кӏэнинтӏ лыцӏакӏ туърмәс ккӏыърэ̄с гьу ккәлэ̄с ттәнцӏ. Ик ләйктӏ динэрдыъмбыд синтӏытӏ каркар ппанцӏ гьу синтӏнинтӏәдды иъшш. Ик нипӏитт бы̄ътӏ пӏәччӏ гьар тӏэ̄ екӏды вит возмещени сыттӏ ми тӏэ̄тӏссәцы ыджэ̄, ик тӏуъ тыътӏ боркь мэ̄ ытӏухъды. Мәссимба̄ла̄.
If it's barbecue you got a hankering for head on over to my uncle John's. Just about anything you could want he can cook up real nice if you give him enough meat and time. Don't ask him for none of that shit they make out East though, that ain't real barbecue.


They came in drunk after we closed, demanding "Open the door so we can drink." I said "No, I don't have wine at night, come back when I open," but they started to lever the doors with knives and rods. I jumped up to the roof shouting and so they ran off. I therefore write to ask you to send for compensation if I'm justified, so I get what I'm due. Best wishes.


Китә̄бы пӏырәппыъәс чӏиррәкӏ до̄ттӏнӣ хханэ бытӏ. Нигӯътӏ кӏэнчӏ тӏӯъ тӣтӏды япӏ гьу двиъсинттӏдэды уъртӏмэ̄ чӏӯ, тӏви вә̄нд кӏокӏтӏычӏәд имитӏиъ джо̄ш виъсэ̄. Ӏә̄дә̄бә̄ вит ым ләйктӏ бы̄ъминдэ хая̄лнә̄м сәм та̄нтӏуъпӏтӏэыъ, ыъкӏа̄нәс мухтәлифэ̄, сәнчӏэ̄сы гӯътӏ оккӏ тӏвитиъ бы̄ъмәд гьашәд мәнцӏ.


[[File:Guimin tweet 1.png|thumb]]
A great book is like a close friend. No matter how many times you close it and come back to it, you'll always derive joy from reading it. Literature allows us to dive into a world of our imagination, in other words a distraction from the real world.
сон. тӏәрнерәм. ыг «JAPAN expo»дэ синтӏычӏ ттӏил е джо̄ш. миръәдж байрамӣ до̄леисӣ та̄тӏ еркӏи. до̄лэ̄сы сәм әттӏ мигъ гьу цӏиръ хин. вин. яоиәмәс уъпӏинтӏ. бәлэ ю̄ъс о̄с мэ̄ дыкӏытӏ рукӏтӏэ̄. яоиәсы. июл 14э байрамсы до̄леисы ватӏинс мигъәш мәс. ыг сә о̄мэ, вин яоиәмәс уъпӏинтӏ.


hier. des jeunes. ils preferent aller a la Japan expo. plutot que feter la fete nationale. notre si grand et beau pays. ils achetent. des yaois. oui mous m'avez bien entendu. des yaois. le 14 julliet la fete nationale notre grand patrie. ce jour la ils achetentdu yaoi


yesterday. the youth. they prefer going to JAPAN expo. instead of celebrating the national holiday. our country so big and beautiful. they buy. yaois. yes you heard me right. yaois. the 14th of july the national holiday our big homeland. this day, they buy yaoi.
Чӏӯсы ниминсы сә эв тимсә̄лис ынӣс ыъкӏмыънэ зәнцӏ гьу юрр сәтиъ гинэ тӏәш лләнцӏ гӯътӏ? Тӏви вэцӏухъма ръо̄н сәтиъ сидычӏәмәс хин накӏтӏды кортӏ, би кисәр сәтиъ би кин сәтиъ вӣдухъычӏәмәс хин накӏтӏды кортӏ? О̄ сә гӯътӏ, The Thinker!


What's the name of that one statue of the guy sitting on a rock with his fist on his chin? Do you think his butt gets sore from all the sitting or his hand or chin get sore from all the thinking? Oh that's what it was, The Thinker!


Кӏу нәвъсы эукариотэ̄с сәсы? Бибәшшэ̄д, ми кӏиәш нииттӏ са̄дэ̄.


What kind of eukaryote is that? Sorry, I'm just not from around here.
Тә̄тӏуъ дәндәл... Тофәнг тыътӏуъ.


Steady... Fire.


Ыг эукариотэ̄с сә о̄мә̄ээ̄ вэдинтӏухъ эве хин га̄йнтӏды. «Ӯ ик сэлулм тӏырӣ тыринтӏ нӯъ, ми квырки хин әттӏма?» вирг кӏатӏуъ мацордиъсыэ̄ нә̄ъм. Гӯ ик дәъякъ упӏитӏиъкьи сэлулм дуъсыгъә̄с лар тты̄нәсды мәнтӏиъ гьәъшшәд ни эонигъ эв хин гьу сә виъсм тэ̄нтӏды вэ̄вэдәнтӏиъ.


Eukaryotes these days think they're so special. "Wow I have three cells now aren't I so quirky?" get a job like the rest of us. I bet in not even an eon they'll be hoarding too many cells to count and not even know what all of them do.
Тэкра̄рм сәтиъ виркӏтӏ тӏуъччӏ, бәлэ, мин ю̄ътӏ сә гӯътӏ нэ̄чӏэ тӏӯъ о̄ста̄д сәтиъ нэкӏитӏиъды гьашэ̄. Тӏӯъ бэ̄нтӏычӏәм вӣдинтӏ, бә̄вр сә̄ъэ̄с огъэ̄рэ.


The repetitiveness of it is boring, yes, but it's the only way you'll truly master it. You know what they say, ten thousand hours and whatnot.


Да̄стиныс виъсә̄с ккӏа, ми сәнтӏитӏиъкьи иъшш е тӏукӏэ̄ ик гьәъч сә дыро̄вӣ тә̄тӏссә.
Әгәрчи тита̄тӏ, әмтӏухъчӏәсы са̄дэ̄ мәс интӏвицыэ̄сы кӏӯгьәд сә дәр ццӏапӏыгъан ита̄тӏ мәджнӯн сәнтӏитӏиъкьичӏәш ''такэ̄'' иъшш гӯътӏ.


The legends all say that if I ate the fruit from this tree I would run faster. Now that I have though, all I've gained is the feeling that I ''should'' run faster from whatever possessed that old tree.
Ик сә имчӏ сытрелбищрэ̄дэ ттӏилитӏиъкьи джо̄ш, мин ю̄ътӏ ВАГ-73-әсы, джо̄дэ̄с сә висэ̄с хин, исинтӏ дуъчч уът дыкӏрәды.


It'd be fun to take this one out on the range, but VAG-73s, especially in this good of condition, are hard to come by.


Зыз бӣн бырэдж, зыз зыз бӣн бырэдж. Икми синттӏуъ гьу вит бо̄шшәм виъсә̄с дыкӏрә!


Buzz little bee, buzz buzz little bee. Come along and find all the flowers with me!
Ккӏа эвмәс "ретвит" сә сӯъринӣ ттытӏ. Чӏу мәън тиртӏ?


It says someone "retweeted" that picture. What does that mean?


Къа̄нӯными авиацыэ̄с виъды̄нәс виъсәмы сәмвоккӏәд, бӣнәс пӏэкк ӣтӏыъ такэ̄ ни угьэ̄. Пӏэккәм исинтӏ бырэдж дуъсыгъэ̄ билтӏ тӏуъм бырэдж сәтиъ буътнуъпӏәд тирыъндэды. Бӣнәс, тәъбәън, пӏэкк ӣтӏ ни кӏэнчӏ. Э̄ррэ̄ бӣнә̄с кӏадг сәнчӏэ̄мәс мәнвис нитты̄нәсыъчӏэ вӣдинтӏухъды нидӯнтӏ.


According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyways. Because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
Ик почт электрон вицәпуръәд Нигериәд до̄тӏә нӯъ. Кӏу чӏӯниъ хин гьарац ми вит синтӏды тӏәмӣ ымтӏә, тӏәс вит 20млн₽ мэ̄ ӣнтӏцы, ик гӯътӏиъ ри!


I just got electronic mail from a Nigerian prince. He said that as soon as the money I sent him comes through he'll send me 20 million rubles, I'm rich!


«Quick brown fox» матын чаме эттэзе баръиъбиъ әърәбӣс бырӯъос, кӏо̄ш сәвътӣэ̄мәс гьу нәъгьыввӣ бӣъды са̄дэ̄. Рэ̄дыкэ̄сы кӏыриъччэ̄сы га̄йтӏ пӏӯв, гьу тӏиркӏтӏерәм виъсәм ик виъдәнцӏухъды нӯъбыд воккӏытиъ гьу нипӏиттитиъ (сингармонизмәми) чӏиррәкӏимбыд әъсрӣимбыд ттӏилинтӏычӏәсы мәс гӯътӏ двиъчӏ


obligatory quick brown fox sample text using entirely arabic words just to test out phonetics and grammar. first is the definite proto, and second is me implementing all sound and ortho changes (including the vowel harmony) ive thought of so far into what the modern may end up looking like
Кӏатӏырг, мамэ̄ "сә̄ъгьир пӏакӏайф" накӏытӏ иттифа̄къ гьу нуъ кор га̄йтӏ гьайъ нәджәмисинэ, ик гьинэцӏ тә̄тӏгьэ, вӣ е-секс рп кансел эхэнтӏуъ, ик ирр рӯъгьнӣ тӏо опӏтӏ гәмбэсинигъ къа̄риш ноднипӏиттәш


Kitten, mommy accidentally got "wizard high" and is now in the astral realm, we're gonna have to call off the e-sex rp, I can't find your soul amongst the gnashing teeth of fate


[[File:Moon Jiujutsu.jpg|thumb]]
уът ми пӏэкк мӣндэ
уът ми бӣътӏ хин хуй
уът сә вӣдытӏчӏэ мәс мидиркӏтӏ
кӏурсәд джиу-джитсуәш мӣнис мәс


fly me to the moon
Иккы Karmandric Mossraven-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ пӏә̄ш митиъ тиртӏ
let me kick is fucking ass
Иккы Joranathon Thornblood-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ шафсәр митиъ тиртӏ
let me show it what I learned
Иккы Vortebel Graveheart-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ квартӏ митиъ тиртӏ
in my moon jujitsu class
Иккы Thorandis Wolfpenus-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ мэс ыъкминытиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Grunduplunk Wormnugget-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ шәлг ттӏытӏуъ бәтт рәцӏәнэ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Dribbapindus Horsecorn-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ гьэ̄м шырапӏнэлиътиъ гэнэ̄тиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Eggnut Thunderbarf-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ милиътӏкъарӏ тӏәпӏыгъан вәппэ̄биъ тӣтӏәды бинк митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Jerbinkus Cheesetickle-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ суккакӏ ю̄ъсә̄ тӏипӏә̄ эвпӏә̄въкӏ  тӣтӏәды бинк митиъ тиртӏ


I am Karmandric Mossraven, you have my axe
I am Joranathon Thornblood, you have my blade
I am Vortebel Graveheart, you have my hammer
I am Thorandis Wolfpenus, you have my bag of rocks
I am Grunduplunk Wormnugget, you have my turnip tied to a rope
I am Dribbapindus Horsecorn, you have my handful of loose shrapnel
I am Eggnut Thunderbarf, you have my old pumpkin filled with wasps
I am Jerbinkus Cheesetickle, you have my ladle full of fairly warm soup


[[File:Chronically outside.jpg|thumb]]
мән сә иттӏинәд хроническэ̄
ппанцӏинигъчӏ кӏукӏтӏ тэ̄нтӏ кӏу
О̄О̄О̄о̄о̄о̄ э̄, сә чӏиппэкӏ двә̄ гьә̄ъцӏвис хвәз семичкӣъ сәм ттӏилды тир ХИН
person who is chronically outside
they see discourse and just go
HOOOooo man, this is JUST like when two sparrows want the same sunflower seed


Иккы Zankar Shadowmoon-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ шафсәр митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Dabeebel Kabeebel-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ Ккӏыър Уъпӏэгӯъсәртиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Thorganald Wizzberry-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ тӏа̄лъ кәмбәмтиъ гъареәмтиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Diagonus Hypotenork-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ нагецыс әджәрэ̄мтиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Slardanagrath Flenk-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ Юл Хә̄тиъ Нивиъдәнцӏ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Barfigan Chunderthrust-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ киса гӯъмынәс бинк ккьоныргәми гэнәми митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Jarensendulep Mordusplent-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ фанфик Kirby's Air Rider-әтиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Winky Peepins-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ вэ̄йырг митиъ кьёв тиртӏ


[[File:Country Gnomes.jpg|thumb]]
I am Zankar Shadowmoon, you have my sword
гномәм до̄лэ̄с,
I am Dabeebel Kabeebel, you have my Dagger of the Underbeast
уттӏыс митиъ минтӏуъ
I am Thorganald Wizzberry, you have my bag of assorted teeth
джа̄гдэ,
I am Diagonus Hypotenork, you have my dragon nuggets
хиттӏэнтӏды такэ̄
I am Slardanagrath Flenk, you have my Ointment of Uncertain Origin
э̄ сәнчӏэ̄сы хин сәсы такърӣбән огьӯрсы пӏытт митиъ сә вебсайтәд тӣды тӏиркӏтӏ әттӏ дыъчч га̄йтӏ хин. Джа̄гэ чӏу адуъкӏ, мэ̄ екӏтӏуъ, сә нәвъ апсурд джо̄де вит дыкӏтӏә.
I am Barfigan Chunderthrust, you have my pocket full of loose acorns
west virginia
I am Jarensendulep Mordusplent, you have my Kirby's Air Rider fanfiction
I am Winky Peepins, you have my cool stick


country gnomes,
take my bones
to a place,
they don't belong
see shit like this is the reason that it's so hard to turn my back on this website. Where else, pray tell, are you going to find this kind of quality nonsense.
west virginia


Кӏу мӣттӏыъмбыд горилинигъ гьу гыризылинигъ тӏыънтӏкьима кӏәппӏытт?
Гӯ жавабсы, тәъбәън, кӏәппӏытт гориләсы.
Би ымтӏуъ.
Гӯ огьӯрсы тӏәш са̄дәсы, гьу эв огьӯрсы са̄дэ̄.
Ыг кӏәппӏытт горил бягъакӏыс тыринтӏ, гьу сә бягъакӏыс быъгэнтӏыъ AR-15 афтӏаматӏәм двиъ-тирды.


[[File:Comfy Bed.jpg|thumb]]
What would win in a fight between a silverback gorilla and a grizzly bear?
мәнг гэнырг. ми диндэ имтӏуъ. ми тӏэ̄тӏды такэ̄. гъайб ёргъ. ссәнцӏ хин. ми диндэ имтӏуъ. мәнг гэнырг.
The answer, of course, is a silverback gorilla.
 
Now hold on.
comfy bed. take me home. to the place. where i belong. pillow blanky. sleeping soundly. take me home. comfy bed.
The reason for this is very simple, and it's only one reason.
A silverback gorilla has fingers, and it can use those fingers to dual-wield AR-15 assault rifles.




[[File:Welcome to the Jungle Guimin.jpg|thumb]]
Такърӣбән ккӏа «кӏу хин пирог митиъ бәвкӏтӏ»
Маргьәъбән джәнгәлэ
Нә̄ъ дәрвис диврә̄с тыринтӏ
Нә̄ъ виъсм тӏӯъ хвәз ттӏилды тиртӏ
Сә сәнчӏэ̄сы дыро̄всы гӯънтӏссә


Welcome to the jungle
Such as "who the hell is eating my pie"
We've got lots of trees
We've got everything you want
If that thing is trees




ГӮЪТӀКЬИ ГОСПӀОД ОПОССУМ
Синтӏинтӏиндэ гӯънцӏ гьарпацӏ ябыкъмппӏэ нә̄ъм, эттэз бэ̄нтӏды кӏу "Твә̄р тӣтӏуъ ппё чӏуъ ы̄в тӣнтӏыъ гьарпацӏ." Кӏу ми "Ни, ик мит нибытӏ та̄тӏ нукӏтӏэ̄, ппёмэ мәс двиъсинтӏинтӏуъиндэ," мин ю̄ътӏ кӏэнинтӏ лыцӏакӏ туърмәс ккӏыърэ̄с гьу ккәлэ̄с ттәнцӏ. Ик ләйктӏ динэрдыъмбыд синтӏытӏ каркар ппанцӏ гьу синтӏнинтӏәдды иъшш. Ик нипӏитт бы̄ътӏ пӏәччӏ гьар тӏэ̄ екӏды вит возмещени сыттӏ ми тӏэ̄тӏссәцы ыджэ̄, ик тӏуъ тыътӏ боркь мэ̄ ытӏухъды. Мәссимба̄ла̄.
«Госпӏод Опоссум, ик тӏви рыцардэ ттӏилтӏ»


LONG LIVE SIR POSSUM
They came in drunk after we closed, demanding "Open the door so we can drink." I said "No, I don't have wine at night, come back when I open," but they started to lever the doors with knives and rods. I jumped up to the roof shouting and so they ran off. I therefore write to ask you to send for compensation if I'm justified, so I get what I'm due. Best wishes.
"Sir Possum, I knight thee"




The word person starts with the M sound. Ma, ama, am.
[[File:Guimin tweet 1.png|thumb]]
сон. тӏәрнерәм. ыг «JAPAN expo»дэ синтӏычӏ ттӏил е джо̄ш. миръәдж байрамӣ до̄леисӣ та̄тӏ еркӏи. до̄лэ̄сы сәм әттӏ мигъ гьу цӏиръ хин. вин. яоиәмәс уъпӏинтӏ. бәлэ ю̄ъс о̄с мэ̄ дыкӏытӏ рукӏтӏэ̄. яоиәсы. июл 14э байрамсы до̄леисы ватӏинс мигъәш мәс. ыг сә о̄мэ, вин яоиәмәс уъпӏинтӏ.
 
hier. des jeunes. ils preferent aller a la Japan expo. plutot que feter la fete nationale. notre si grand et beau pays. ils achetent. des yaois. oui mous m'avez bien entendu. des yaois. le 14 julliet la fete nationale notre grand patrie. ce jour la ils achetentdu yaoi
 
yesterday. the youth. they prefer going to JAPAN expo. instead of celebrating the national holiday. our country so big and beautiful. they buy. yaois. yes you heard me right. yaois. the 14th of july the national holiday our big homeland. this day, they buy yaoi.


Гӯ баръиъс мән воккӏэ М кӏантӏ. Ма, а-ма, ам.


Кӏу нәвъсы эукариотэ̄с сәсы? Бибәшшэ̄д, ми кӏиәш нииттӏ са̄дэ̄.


Бэ̄ръ икми якӏтӏәгьэ. ''Мән''. Ә дыкӏтӏуъ кӏыриъчч тӣ рукӏтӏэ̄. Ни ''мәън'', ''мән''.
What kind of eukaryote is that? Sorry, I'm just not from around here.


Sound out the word with me. ''Person''. Be sure to get the Ä right. Not ''meaning'', ''person''.


Ыг эукариотэ̄с сә о̄мә̄ээ̄ вэдинтӏухъ эве хин га̄йнтӏды. «Ӯ ик сэлулм тӏырӣ тыринтӏ нӯъ, ми квырки хин әттӏма?» вирг кӏатӏуъ мацордиъсыэ̄ нә̄ъм. Гӯ ик дәъякъ упӏитӏиъкьи сэлулм дуъсыгъә̄с лар тты̄нәсды мәнтӏиъ гьәъшшәд ни эонигъ эв хин гьу сә виъсм тэ̄нтӏды вэ̄вэдәнтӏиъ.


Ривалюцыэ̄сы Сәънӏэ̄с гьу артинксы тӏәш фә̄джиъэ̄сы бәшаринӣ ӣттӏ. Мутт гайджэ̄тиъ сәм до̄лэ̄сэ «пиръәфтэ» ттӏанцӏды воркӏтӏ е биврэ̄ хин, мин ю̄ътӏ вит ынкӏэрутив ӣттӏ нидырӯ, вит гайдж ӣттӏ нитӏыпӏтӏ, вит мәнвис карә̄м нибибытӏ, вит әъза̄б психологическ (тӏыриътӏ бы̄ъмэ әъза̄б мә̄ттӣ сәм) киттӏакӏ нинуътӏ, зарар хин бы̄ъминӣ тәъбӣъэ тита̄тӏ. тихнологиэ̄ дэвэлопӏ та̄мынәс та̄мынәсчӏәс вит ттӏанцӏчӏ тӣтӏиъ дуъш. Тәъбәън вит мәнвис карә̄мәд е бивр имәнтӏиъ гьу зарар хин бы̄ъминӣ тәъбӣъэ тӣтӏиъ, якъӣн вит нидырӯм ынкӏэрутивнтиъ гьу әъза̄б психологическ е кӏэнитӏиъ, вит әъза̄б мә̄ттӣ до̄лэ̄сэ «пиръәфтэ» е кӏэнитӏиъкьи.
Eukaryotes these days think they're so special. "Wow I have three cells now aren't I so quirky?" get a job like the rest of us. I bet in not even an eon they'll be hoarding too many cells to count and not even know what all of them do.


The Industrial Revolution and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race. They have greatly increased the life-expectancy of those of us who live in “advanced” countries, but they have destabilized society, have made life unfulfilling, have subjected human beings to indignities, have led to widespread psychological suffering (in the Third World to physical suffering as well) and have inflicted severe damage on the natural world. The continued development of technology will worsen the situation. It will certainly subject human beings to greater indignities and inflict greater damage on the natural world, it will probably lead to greater social disruption and psychological suffering, and it may lead to increased physical suffering even in “advanced” countries.


Да̄стиныс виъсә̄с ккӏа, ми сәнтӏитӏиъкьи иъшш е тӏукӏэ̄ ик гьәъч сә дыро̄вӣ тә̄тӏссә.
Әгәрчи тита̄тӏ, әмтӏухъчӏәсы са̄дэ̄ мәс интӏвицыэ̄сы кӏӯгьәд сә дәр ццӏапӏыгъан ита̄тӏ мәджнӯн сәнтӏитӏиъкьичӏәш ''такэ̄'' иъшш гӯътӏ.


[[File:Medieval Cats.png|thumb]]
The legends all say that if I ate the fruit from this tree I would run faster. Now that I have though, all I've gained is the feeling that I ''should'' run faster from whatever possessed that old tree.
Катуъсы Къарнысинэ Мичинэ:
*гьәълтӏ вис та̄нәнцӏ
*кәлӣсдэ иънәнцӏ
*кӏэнгэ̄с сәрэ̄е иънәнцӏ
*ынкӏэрутивинӣ дуънәнцӏ
Катуъсы нӯъ:
*тәмбәл гьу умәдур
*кә̄фирс
*тәмбәл дуъсыгъ кӏэнгэ̄с сәрэ̄е ӣтӏды


Cats in Middle Ages:
*hard working
*went to church
*walked on hind legs
*contributed to society
Cats now:
*lazy and ungrateful
*atheists
*too lazy to walk on hind legs


Зыз бӣн бырэдж, зыз зыз бӣн бырэдж. Икми синттӏуъ гьу вит бо̄шшәм виъсә̄с дыкӏрә!


[[File:Guimin Landlord.png|thumb]]
Buzz little bee, buzz buzz little bee. Come along and find all the flowers with me!
Хозяйн Тӏӣтӏә Бӣт Рентӏ Ттӏәлтӏыъндэды Э̄ррэ̄ Пакъинӣ Е Мигьэ Вӣдытӏухъ


Landlord Forced To Raise Rent Due To Thinking Of Bigger Number


Къа̄нӯными авиацыэ̄с виъды̄нәс виъсәмы сәмвоккӏәд, бӣнәс пӏэкк ӣтӏыъ такэ̄ ни угьэ̄. Пӏэккәм исинтӏ бырэдж дуъсыгъэ̄ билтӏ тӏуъм бырэдж сәтиъ буътнуъпӏәд тирыъндэды. Бӣнәс, тәъбәън, пӏэкк ӣтӏ ни кӏэнчӏ. Э̄ррэ̄ бӣнә̄с кӏадг сәнчӏэ̄мәс мәнвис нитты̄нәсыъчӏэ вӣдинтӏухъды нидӯнтӏ.


[[File:Guimin Bear.jpg|thumb]]
According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyways. Because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
Сә гӯътӏ
Агь
Сытӏәнцӏ сәтиъ екӏтӏуърэ̄ роспинэ джәрәнинэ


There he is
Bear
His arrival was foretold in ancient murals.


«Quick brown fox» матын чаме эттэзе баръиъбиъ әърәбӣс бырӯъос, кӏо̄ш сәвътӣэ̄мәс гьу нәъгьыввӣ бӣъды са̄дэ̄. Рэ̄дыкэ̄сы кӏыриъччэ̄сы га̄йтӏ пӏӯв, гьу тӏиркӏтӏерәм виъсәм ик виъдәнцӏухъды нӯъбыд воккӏытиъ гьу нипӏиттитиъ (сингармонизмәми) чӏиррәкӏимбыд әъсрӣимбыд ттӏилинтӏычӏәсы мәс гӯътӏ двиъчӏ


[[File:Guimin Floorboards.jpg|thumb]]
obligatory quick brown fox sample text using entirely arabic words just to test out phonetics and grammar. first is the definite proto, and second is me implementing all sound and ortho changes (including the vowel harmony) ive thought of so far into what the modern may end up looking like
БУЪТ ӢТӀ ТЭ̄НТӀ ВИЪПӀЫ КАКМӘСӘРЭ̄ ВИЪСЭ̄
ИК ПӀАЛАВИЦЭ̄С МИТИЪ ТТӀӘЛНИНТӏИНЭ НЫРОДЖЭ̄


THE GROUND TREMBLES WITH MY EVERY STEP
I HAVE INSTALLED MY FLOORBOARDS INCORRECTLY


[[File:Moon Jiujutsu.jpg|thumb]]
уът ми пӏэкк мӣндэ
уът ми бӣътӏ хин хуй
уът сә вӣдытӏчӏэ мәс мидиркӏтӏ
кӏурсәд джиу-джитсуәш мӣнис мәс


Двә̄ Кӏонтӏорэ̄с Джәрим Тә̄тӏә Несоблюдениэ̄с Нон Запӏравкӏэ̄сэ Minnesota-әш
fly me to the moon
let me kick is fucking ass
let me show it what I learned
in my moon jujitsu class


Two Companies Fined for Violations at Nine Minnesota Gas Stations


[[File:Chronically outside.jpg|thumb]]
мән сә иттӏинәд хроническэ̄
ппанцӏинигъчӏ кӏукӏтӏ тэ̄нтӏ кӏу
О̄О̄О̄о̄о̄о̄ э̄, сә чӏиппэкӏ двә̄ гьә̄ъцӏвис хвәз семичкӣъ сәм ттӏилды тир ХИН


Ми вӣцӏ тӏӯъ вәд сыттӏыъды висэ̄, мин ю̄ътӏ кьӏӯтӏәсы гӯътӏ тӏӯътӏы дуъсыгъэ̄. Луътфән кьӏа̄тӏигъ синттӏуъ, километырәм пӏә̄въкӏә̄с са̄дэ̄ кӏиъсәд ттӏэнтӏ.
person who is chronically outside
they see discourse and just go
HOOOooo man, this is JUST like when two sparrows want the same sunflower seed


I know you're a good swimmer, but the current is too strong. Please just go across the bridge, it's only a few kilometers from here.


[[File:Country Gnomes.jpg|thumb]]
гномәм до̄лэ̄с,
уттӏыс митиъ минтӏуъ
джа̄гдэ,
хиттӏэнтӏды такэ̄
э̄ сәнчӏэ̄сы хин сәсы такърӣбән огьӯрсы пӏытт митиъ сә вебсайтәд тӣды тӏиркӏтӏ әттӏ дыъчч га̄йтӏ хин. Джа̄гэ чӏу адуъкӏ, мэ̄ екӏтӏуъ, сә нәвъ апсурд джо̄де вит дыкӏтӏә.
west virginia


Э̄ ТӀВИ
country gnomes,
МӘН КЬЁВ
take my bones
СЫПАС ИКМИ СИЦӀДЫ 🙂
to a place,
ИК ТТӀИЛЫТӀ ДЖО̄Ш ХИИИИИИН 🙂
they don't belong
ТӀВИ ДИНДЭ МӘС СИНТТӀ ТАКЭ̄ НАЧЁКЭ̄
see shit like this is the reason that it's so hard to turn my back on this website. Where else, pray tell, are you going to find this kind of quality nonsense.
МӘ̄ТӀСӘР МӘС ПОПКОР НӘ̄С УПӀИТӀИЪ
west virginia
ГЬУ ВӘТ ЫМ КИНОМ 12+ ДЫКӀӘНТӀИЪ
ГЬУ ИК ВИТ ТӀВИ СӘ ТТӀИЛИТӀИЪӘД
Э̄РРЭ̄ ТӀӮЪСЫ БӘЧ ДОТТАГЪЫСЫ МӘС


HEY YOU
COOL GUY
THANKS FOR HANGING OUT WITH ME 🙂
I HAD A LOOOOOOT OF FUN 🙂
YOU SHOULD COME TO MY HOUSE FOR A SLEEPOVER
MY MOM WILL MAKE US POPPYCORN
AND LET US WATCH PG-13 MOVIES
AND I'LL LET YOU PICK
BECAUSE YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND


[[File:Comfy Bed.jpg|thumb]]
мәнг гэнырг. ми диндэ имтӏуъ. ми тӏэ̄тӏды такэ̄. гъайб ёргъ. ссәнцӏ хин. ми диндэ имтӏуъ. мәнг гэнырг.


Э̄кь вӣърэ упӏтӏкьи гьу гӯътӏиъ тӏипӏ о̄мныънэ эв. Э̄кь вӣърэ вит нэкӏтӏкьи гьу гӯътӏиъ тӏипӏ мацордйыънэ гӯътӏэ̄с
comfy bed. take me home. to the place. where i belong. pillow blanky. sleeping soundly. take me home. comfy bed.


Build a man a fire and he will be warm for one day. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.


[[File:Welcome to the Jungle Guimin.jpg|thumb]]
Маргьәъбән джәнгәлэ
Нә̄ъ дәрвис диврә̄с тыринтӏ
Нә̄ъ виъсм тӏӯъ хвәз ттӏилды тиртӏ
Сә сәнчӏэ̄сы дыро̄всы гӯънтӏссә


Кӏуън кӏорчымэ̄индэ синтӏытӏ гьу екӏатӏ «ик нугь никӏукӏтӏыъ, ик тӏәмӣ ппёэ̄ упӏитӏиъ.»
Welcome to the jungle
We've got lots of trees
We've got everything you want
If that thing is trees


A dog walked into a tavern and said "I can’t see a thing, I'll open this one."


ГӮЪТӀКЬИ ГОСПӀОД ОПОССУМ
«Госпӏод Опоссум, ик тӏви рыцардэ ттӏилтӏ»


Нәгн, Нәгн; о̄ әъджәб (митиъ).
LONG LIVE SIR POSSUM
Нәгн, Нәгн; сәнттӏуърэ̄дэ мэ̄ пӏа̄ккӏ дуътӏ.
"Sir Possum, I knight thee"


Bread, Bread; oh wonder (of mine).
Bread, Bread; come feed me.


The word person starts with the M sound. Ma, ama, am.


Дунайәд Волгадэ! ръӯе̄сы двә̄, до̄лэ̄сы эв!
Гӯ баръиъс мән воккӏэ М кӏантӏ. Ма, а-ма, ам.


From the Danube to the Volga! - Two rivers, One nation!


Бэ̄ръ икми якӏтӏәгьэ. ''Мән''. Ә дыкӏтӏуъ кӏыриъчч тӣ рукӏтӏэ̄. Ни ''мәън'', ''мән''.


Баркалааа ик гьуъпп гъайбмәс ттӏытӏ! Әсинтӏ мыд гьу та̄нрәыъ гынэчӏ гьу ик гьуъпп гыркисӣ та̄нтӏычӏэ ттӏытӏ!
Sound out the word with me. ''Person''. Be sure to get the Ä right. Not ''meaning'', ''person''.


hiii i love pillows! they're soft and squishy and i love hugging them!


Ривалюцыэ̄сы Сәънӏэ̄с гьу артинксы тӏәш фә̄джиъэ̄сы бәшаринӣ ӣттӏ. Мутт гайджэ̄тиъ сәм до̄лэ̄сэ «пиръәфтэ» ттӏанцӏды воркӏтӏ е биврэ̄ хин, мин ю̄ътӏ вит ынкӏэрутив ӣттӏ нидырӯ, вит гайдж ӣттӏ нитӏыпӏтӏ, вит мәнвис карә̄м нибибытӏ, вит әъза̄б психологическ (тӏыриътӏ бы̄ъмэ әъза̄б мә̄ттӣ сәм) киттӏакӏ нинуътӏ, зарар хин бы̄ъминӣ тәъбӣъэ тита̄тӏ. тихнологиэ̄ дэвэлопӏ та̄мынәс та̄мынәсчӏәс вит ттӏанцӏчӏ тӣтӏиъ дуъш. Тәъбәън вит мәнвис карә̄мәд е бивр имәнтӏиъ гьу зарар хин бы̄ъминӣ тәъбӣъэ тӣтӏиъ, якъӣн вит нидырӯм ынкӏэрутивнтиъ гьу әъза̄б психологическ е кӏэнитӏиъ, вит әъза̄б мә̄ттӣ до̄лэ̄сэ «пиръәфтэ» е кӏэнитӏиъкьи.


Ыг компютэрәс тӏо пӏаникӏ ядрэ̄ дәркӏытӏухъ гьу тынтӏ ю̄ътӏ виъкӏэн. Кьавиш бы̄ътӏуъ би мытӏуъ сә̄нӣэ̄ кәм синтӏычӏрэ̄ тӏо.
The Industrial Revolution and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race. They have greatly increased the life-expectancy of those of us who live in “advanced” countries, but they have destabilized society, have made life unfulfilling, have subjected human beings to indignities, have led to widespread psychological suffering (in the Third World to physical suffering as well) and have inflicted severe damage on the natural world. The continued development of technology will worsen the situation. It will certainly subject human beings to greater indignities and inflict greater damage on the natural world, it will probably lead to greater social disruption and psychological suffering, and it may lead to increased physical suffering even in “advanced” countries.


Your computer has experienced a kernel panic and had to restart. Press a key or wait a few seconds to continue.
 
[[File:Medieval Cats.png|thumb]]
Катуъсы Къарнысинэ Мичинэ:
*гьәълтӏ вис та̄нәнцӏ
*кәлӣсдэ иънәнцӏ
*кӏэнгэ̄с сәрэ̄е иънәнцӏ
*ынкӏэрутивинӣ дуънәнцӏ
Катуъсы нӯъ:
*тәмбәл гьу умәдур
*кә̄фирс
*тәмбәл дуъсыгъ кӏэнгэ̄с сәрэ̄е ӣтӏды
 
Cats in Middle Ages:
*hard working
*went to church
*walked on hind legs
*contributed to society
Cats now:
*lazy and ungrateful
*atheists
*too lazy to walk on hind legs




Сә чӏӯйәсы киттәсы. Дыкӏинтӏуъ кӏыриъчч ӏәмә̄л тӏвитиъ виъс ю̄ъсми им ю̄ъс сытӏинтӏинәдычӏрэ̄ пӏайсәш.
[[File:Guimin Landlord.png|thumb]]
 
Хозяйн Тӏӣтӏә Бӣт Рентӏ Ттӏәлтӏыъндэды Э̄ррэ̄ Пакъинӣ Е Мигьэ Вӣдытӏухъ
This is the last stop. Make sure to take all your belongings with you before leaving the train.
 


♖ Рухх
Landlord Forced To Raise Rent Due To Thinking Of Bigger Number
Руктӏэ̄ ӣтӏ
♗ Фӣл
Диагоналэ̄ ӣтӏ
♕ Вәзӣр
Вәзӣрәсы = руххәсы + фӣләсы
♔ Шә̄гь
Къиъттэ̄сы бәч гы̄рэ̄сы
♘ Гьиъса̄н
L-игъ ӣтӏ
♙ Бэ̄дакъ
Ӣтӏрэ̄дэ са̄дэ̄


♖ The rook
It moves in straight lines
♗ The bishop
It moves diagonally
♕ The queen
Queen = rook + bishop
♔ The king
The most important piece
♘ The knight
It moves in an L shape
♙ The pawn
It moves forward only


[[File:Guimin Bear.jpg|thumb]]
Сә гӯътӏ
Агь
Сытӏәнцӏ сәтиъ екӏтӏуърэ̄ роспинэ джәрәнинэ
There he is
Bear
His arrival was foretold in ancient murals.


Тӏӯъ хвәз званич екӏычӏэ ттӏәлтӏссә, луътфән тырупкӏ ттӏытӏуъуъппыд гьу кӏо̄ш двиъбы̄ътӏуъ. Тӏӯъ кумаг бытӏссә ю̄ътӏ, тырупкӏ ттӏытӏуъуъппыд гьу набирач чилифонистэ тӏо бәвкӏтӏуъ.


If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again. If you need help, hang up and dial your operator.
[[File:Guimin Floorboards.jpg|thumb]]
БУЪТ ӢТӀ ТЭ̄НТӀ ВИЪПӀЫ КАКМӘСӘРЭ̄ ВИЪСЭ̄
ИК ПӀАЛАВИЦЭ̄С МИТИЪ ТТӀӘЛНИНТӏИНЭ НЫРОДЖЭ̄
 
THE GROUND TREMBLES WITH MY EVERY STEP
I HAVE INSTALLED MY FLOORBOARDS INCORRECTLY




Сәлә̄м. Ниминсы мэ̄ Inigo Montoya-әсы. Тӏӯъ пӏыътӏсәр митиъ бӣънтӏ мир, мытӏӣъ сицӏуъ.
Двә̄ Кӏонтӏорэ̄с Джәрим Тә̄тӏә Несоблюдениэ̄с Нон Запӏравкӏэ̄сэ Minnesota-әш


Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
Two Companies Fined for Violations at Nine Minnesota Gas Stations




Нон Сәнчӏэ̄сы Кӏвӣш Гъарӣбдэ Хин Екӏды
Ми вӣцӏ тӏӯъ вәд сыттӏыъды висэ̄, мин ю̄ътӏ кьӏӯтӏәсы гӯътӏ тӏӯътӏы дуъсыгъэ̄. Луътфән кьӏа̄тӏигъ синттӏуъ, километырәм пӏә̄въкӏә̄с са̄дэ̄ кӏиъсәд ттӏэнтӏ.
«Ик пӏыланэ̄с тыринтӏ. Тӏӯъ әлма̄с тытӏма?»
«Вә̄тӏә̄дәсы онччё̄м цӏахе! Вә̄тӏә̄дәсы онччё̄м цӏахе! Вә̄тӏә̄дәсы онччё̄м цӏахе!»
«Къӏайлэ̄, иккы гориләсы.»
«Тӏӯъ мәън сәәд имтӏма? Э̄, сә угь?»
«Тӣтӏуъ тәзә̄ъгьар вӣсы кӏәчӏәпӏиси ниминми Luther гьу Emily исинтӏды. Ик кӏадг чӏусы чӏусы нидуътӏ.»
«Кисасы тӏо сәм макароны с сыром-әми га̄йнтӏма бинк?»
«Ми пӏӣрӯъ синтӏытбыд.»
«Нәгнәсы гӯънтӏ гьаш.»
«Тӏви вӣцӏ, ттӏанцӏчӏинэ адуъкӏинэ, ми вӣцӏухъ вӣсы сәрвәрәсы къәптта̄нэ̄м дошмәне гӯънинтӏкьиды, сә двә̄ла кэрпы, ппа̄нәс нэ̄чӏэ... вӣкӏәм я̄вэ̄де?... имчӏәш е е гьандуг, ниыъкӏанцӏ, шипәл, вэ̄, нивире хин, нвәнцӏуъпӏтӏэцы»


Nine Things to Whisper to Complete Strangers
I know you're a good swimmer, but the current is too strong. Please just go across the bridge, it's only a few kilometers from here.
"I have the plans. Do you have the diamond?"
"Salty peanuts! Salty peanuts! Salty peanuts!"
"Secretly, I am a gorilla"
"Does this make sense to you? Like, any of it?"
"Pretend we are turtles named Luther and Emily. I don't care who's who."
"Are your pockets full of macaroni and cheese, too?"
"I arrived by elephant."
"Bread is real."
"You know, under different circumstances, I believe we could have been the owners of rival graveyards, each resorting to increasingly desperate, not to mention questionable, nay, even illegal, means to secure , how shall we say... permanent residents?"




Чӏӯниъ ик 5 такърӣбән йә̄рәм ибринтӏды ик гьар мэ̄тӏръӣ мәс ыъкӏатӏ кӏуэ «ынуъсы кәм рәнгэ̄сы адуъкӏэ̄сы га̄йнтӏ» гьу кӏо «э̄ррэ̄ ала̄гьәс хвәз тәъмнӣ биврисмәс ттӏәлытӏ» гьу диркӏинтӏуъ хин сәсы сәнчӏэ̄сы екӏчӏәш ныроджисы гӯънинтӏ э̄ррэ̄ ми ивӣцӏухъ 3 йә̄рэсигъэ̄ ала̄гьәс пӏа̄ккӏ ынуъмәс тӣтӏды миртӏ тэ̄нтӏцы
Э̄ ТӀВИ
МӘН КЬЁВ
СЫПАС ИКМИ СИЦӀДЫ 🙂
ИК ТТӀИЛЫТӀ ДЖО̄Ш ХИИИИИИН 🙂
ТӀВИ ДИНДЭ МӘС СИНТТӀ ТАКЭ̄ НАЧЁКЭ̄
МӘ̄ТӀСӘР МӘС ПОПКОР НӘ̄С УПӀИТӀИЪ
ГЬУ ВӘТ ЫМ КИНОМ 12+ ДЫКӀӘНТӀИЪ
ГЬУ ИК ВИТ ТӀВИ СӘ ТТӀИЛИТӀИЪӘД
Э̄РРЭ̄ ТӀӮЪСЫ БӘЧ ДОТТАГЪЫСЫ МӘС


when i was around 5 i asked my mom  why "some people were different colors" and she said "because god wanted lots of flavours"  and let me tell you that was the wronf thing to say because for the next 3 years i thought god ate people when they died
HEY YOU
 
COOL GUY
 
THANKS FOR HANGING OUT WITH ME 🙂
[[File:Guimin Heroism vs kidneys donated.jpg|thumb]]
I HAD A LOOOOOOT OF FUN 🙂
къәръәмер - хъэрә̄ ттӯнәс
YOU SHOULD COME TO MY HOUSE FOR A SLEEPOVER
MY MOM WILL MAKE US POPPYCORN
AND LET US WATCH PG-13 MOVIES
AND I'LL LET YOU PICK
BECAUSE YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND


heroism - kidneys donated


Э̄кь вӣърэ упӏтӏкьи гьу гӯътӏиъ тӏипӏ о̄мныънэ эв. Э̄кь вӣърэ вит нэкӏтӏкьи гьу гӯътӏиъ тӏипӏ мацордйыънэ гӯътӏэ̄с


Ик ча̄лэш рәгә̄муътиъ тиртӏ
Build a man a fire and he will be warm for one day. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
Э̄ ик йәвгъ мычэ̄мтиъ тытӏ ик термопластикә̄ ттӏытӏдэды буъц, гьу ыг мэ̄тӏсәр мәс суӏә̄л тӏәштиъ мэ̄ эхатӏ, ба̄тӏцы гьәмәтӏиъс ттӏытӏдэ буъц, ми якӏтӏәэды кӏо ''«гьәмәтӏинигъ гьу термопластикинигъ зонэ̄сы пӏәжэ̄сы.»''


I have a translation challenge
so I have a pair of shoes I'm holding together with hot glue, and my mother probed me about it, saying they're being held together by hope,
to which I said, ''"there's a fine line between hope and hot glue."''


Кӏуън кӏорчымэ̄индэ синтӏытӏ гьу екӏатӏ «ик нугь никӏукӏтӏыъ, ик тӏәмӣ ппёэ̄ упӏитӏиъ.»


ТӀӮЪ 25ТӀ НУКӀТӀИНЭ ВИЛИКӀ СӘ ПИРИЛӘД ПӀӘЖ ИМЫТӀМА?
A dog walked into a tavern and said "I can’t see a thing, I'll open this one."
ТӀӮЪ МИРТӀ НЭКӀИНТӀИЪ!
ИК ВИТ ТӀВИ МИРТӀ УЪПӀИТӀИЪ. ИК ӢР ТӀВИТИЪ ДЫКӀИТӀИЪ МАЦОРДЭ̄ ГАЙДЖЭ̄С МӘС. ИК ТӀВИ ДЫКӀИТӀИЪГЬЭ. ТӀӮЪ СУЪП НИРИМИТӀИЪ РИМИТӀИЪ. АЛА̄ГЬӘС ПӘРРИКЪ ТӀЭ̄ НИИМИТӀИЪ. МИ ТӀӮЪДЭ ӢТӀ.


DID YOU TAKE A GREY BIKE FROM THESE RAILINGS ON THE NIGHT OF THE 25TH?
YOU ARE GOING TO DIE!
I AM GOING TO KILL YOU. END T REST OF MY LIFE TRACKING YOU DOWN. I WILL FIND YOUYOU WILL NEVER SLEEP AGAIN. GOD WILL NOT SAVE YOU. I AM COMING FOR YOU.


Нәгн, Нәгн; о̄ әъджәб (митиъ).
Нәгн, Нәгн; сәнттӏуърэ̄дэ мэ̄ пӏа̄ккӏ дуътӏ.
Bread, Bread; oh wonder (of mine).
Bread, Bread; come feed me.


Тӏәс хурхуд ппӏәрӣъ ттытӏ мӣнэ̄ сәрэ̄, гьу ыб гьу свәр двә̄ гьәфтигъ имнинтӏухъ. Мин ю̄ътӏ бишэ̄кӏәм вит бӯр хуй кӏа̄сигъ тӏәш нэкӏытӏчӏ нэ̄чӏэ никӏукӏунтӏгьэыъ нӯъ.


He swallowed a seed last month and then got rain and sunshine for two weeks straight. But doctors still can't figure out how he grew a fucking plant through his skull.
Дунайәд Волгадэ! ръӯе̄сы двә̄, до̄лэ̄сы эв!


From the Danube to the Volga! - Two rivers, One nation!


[[File:LotR Days of Christmas.png|thumb]]
сипӏтӏы кӏугвис сә виъс зинтӏды олур,
биккӏ ккэн сә дыкӏинтӏбыдды,
пӏукӏ гьәълкъэ̄с зәреэ̄с сә виъс минтӏдэды,
гьу дыро̄инэ къуърис ллинтӏды бәтт


seven swans to rule them all,
Баркалааа ик гьуъпп гъайбмәс ттӏытӏ! Әсинтӏ мыд гьу та̄нрәыъ гынэчӏ гьу ик гьуъпп гыркисӣ та̄нтӏычӏэ ттӏытӏ!
six geese to find them,
five golden rings to bring them all,
and in the pear tree to bind them


hiii i love pillows! they're soft and squishy and i love hugging them!


Былёск Кьә̄вкӏ
Былёск Ты̄ме
Майрам
эстетикэ̄с гьвиләмтиъ
сәсы былисынэ̄сы
ми тэ̄нтӏә э̄нкӏтӏ абдалэ̄. иккы иттӏ емыр гьвиләсы


Blue Glitter
Ыг компютэрәс тӏо пӏаникӏ ядрэ̄ дәркӏытӏухъ гьу тынтӏ ю̄ътӏ виъкӏэн. Кьавиш бы̄ътӏуъ би мытӏуъ сә̄нӣэ̄ кәм синтӏычӏрэ̄ тӏо.
Smoke Glitter
Sunset
fish aesthetics
those are lures
I've been fooled. I'm as dumb as a fish


Your computer has experienced a kernel panic and had to restart. Press a key or wait a few seconds to continue.


[[File:Guimin this is my brush.png|thumb]]
Сә екксы мәс гӯътӏ:
Сә басысы мәс гӯътӏ:
Сә холсәсы мәс гӯътӏ:


This is my brush:
Сә чӏӯйәсы киттәсы. Дыкӏинтӏуъ кӏыриъчч ӏәмә̄л тӏвитиъ виъс ю̄ъсми им ю̄ъс сытӏинтӏинәдычӏрэ̄ пӏайсәш.
This is my paint:
This is my canvas:


This is the last stop. Make sure to take all your belongings with you before leaving the train.


Ни, пӏыътӏ-шутӏкӏэ̄сы пӏыътӏ-шутӏкӏэ̄сы ни кӏэнчӏ. Тӏӯъсы мёлкъӏэ̄сы гилтӏэ̄сы шәкәргьӯтӏеэ̄сы га̄йтӏкьи, пӏыътӏ-шутӏкӏэ̄сы га̄йтӏкьи нӯъ лол


Nah, a dad joke is a dad joke no matter what. You could be a pregnant lizard with diabeties, it would still be a dad joke lol
♖ Рухх
 
Руктӏэ̄ ӣтӏ
 
♗ Фӣл
тӏӯъ вирг хин сә о̄мэ тита̄тӏ
Диагоналэ̄ ӣтӏ
э̄ эстроген тытӏуъ! !
♕ Вәзӣр
Вәзӣрәсы = руххәсы + фӣләсы
♔ Шә̄гь
Къиъттэ̄сы бәч гы̄рэ̄сы
♘ Гьиъса̄н
L-игъ ӣтӏ
♙ Бэ̄дакъ
Ӣтӏрэ̄дэ са̄дэ̄


youve worked so hard today
♖ The rook
here have estrogen! !
It moves in straight lines
♗ The bishop
It moves diagonally
♕ The queen
Queen = rook + bishop
♔ The king
The most important piece
♘ The knight
It moves in an L shape
♙ The pawn
It moves forward only




[[File:Guimin water.png|thumb]]
Тӏӯъ хвәз званич екӏычӏэ ттӏәлтӏссә, луътфән тырупкӏ ттӏытӏуъуъппыд гьу кӏо̄ш двиъбы̄ътӏуъ. Тӏӯъ кумаг бытӏссә ю̄ътӏ, тырупкӏ ттӏытӏуъуъппыд гьу набирач чилифонистэ тӏо бәвкӏтӏуъ.
Có rất ngiều nước trong cơ thể tôi. Bạn có muốn uống nó không?


Вәт бивр суълтӏинэ мәс гӯътӏ. Тӏӯъ лоб ытӏинэчӏитиъ тәртӏма?
If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again. If you need help, hang up and dial your operator.


There is a lot of water in my body. Do you want to drink it?


Сәлә̄м. Ниминсы мэ̄ Inigo Montoya-әсы. Тӏӯъ пӏыътӏсәр митиъ бӣънтӏ мир, мытӏӣъ сицӏуъ.


[[File:Guimin spirals.png|thumb]]
Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
тита̄тӏ НЭ̄ЧӏЭ?
ниӣтӏуъпӏтӏэухъды?
сә гъәшш ала̄гьэ бибы̄ътӏ киттэ̄?
ни.
сә до̄ттӏ гьәъләзотиъ воркӏтӏ са̄дэ̄


HOW has he done it?
without falling?
has he cheated god at last?
no.
he has simply befriended the spirals


Нон Сәнчӏэ̄сы Кӏвӣш Гъарӣбдэ Хин Екӏды
«Ик пӏыланэ̄с тыринтӏ. Тӏӯъ әлма̄с тытӏма?»
«Вә̄тӏә̄дәсы онччё̄м цӏахе! Вә̄тӏә̄дәсы онччё̄м цӏахе! Вә̄тӏә̄дәсы онччё̄м цӏахе!»
«Къӏайлэ̄, иккы гориләсы.»
«Тӏӯъ мәън сәәд имтӏма? Э̄, сә угь?»
«Тӣтӏуъ тәзә̄ъгьар вӣсы кӏәчӏәпӏиси ниминми Luther гьу Emily исинтӏды. Ик кӏадг чӏусы чӏусы нидуътӏ.»
«Кисасы тӏо сәм макароны с сыром-әми га̄йнтӏма бинк?»
«Ми пӏӣрӯъ синтӏытбыд.»
«Нәгнәсы гӯънтӏ гьаш.»
«Тӏви вӣцӏ, ттӏанцӏчӏинэ адуъкӏинэ, ми вӣцӏухъ вӣсы сәрвәрәсы къәптта̄нэ̄м дошмәне гӯънинтӏкьиды, сә двә̄ла кэрпы, ппа̄нәс нэ̄чӏэ... вӣкӏәм я̄вэ̄де?... имчӏәш е е гьандуг, ниыъкӏанцӏ, шипәл, вэ̄, нивире хин, нвәнцӏуъпӏтӏэцы»


[[File:Guimin jellyfish.png|thumb]]
Nine Things to Whisper to Complete Strangers
сә тӣтӏыъ нэ̄чӏэ
"I have the plans. Do you have the diamond?"
нииттӏды ппӏэ̄тӏ?
"Salty peanuts! Salty peanuts! Salty peanuts!"
тӏәс виъсмәтиъ вапщэ̄ вӣцӏухъ
"Secretly, I am a gorilla"
нитӣтӏыъ а̄вӣтӏ я̄вэ̄д
"Does this make sense to you? Like, any of it?"
? сә нисӣм мэ̄ екӏтӏ
"Pretend we are turtles named Luther and Emily. I don't care who's who."
хәъд сәэ тӏэ̄тӏ
"Are your pockets full of macaroni and cheese, too?"
то̄къӣф сә ынуъмәс имтӏуъ
"I arrived by elephant."
"Bread is real."
"You know, under different circumstances, I believe we could have been the owners of rival graveyards, each resorting to increasingly desperate, not to mention questionable, nay, even illegal, means to secure , how shall we say... permanent residents?"


how can he do this
without drowning?
what on earth is he thinking
he can't hold his breath forever
? this tells me nothing
there is trickery afoot
arrest this man


Чӏӯниъ ик 5 такърӣбән йә̄рәм ибринтӏды ик гьар мэ̄тӏръӣ мәс ыъкӏатӏ кӏуэ «ынуъсы кәм рәнгэ̄сы адуъкӏэ̄сы га̄йнтӏ» гьу кӏо «э̄ррэ̄ ала̄гьәс хвәз тәъмнӣ биврисмәс ттӏәлытӏ» гьу диркӏинтӏуъ хин сәсы сәнчӏэ̄сы екӏчӏәш ныроджисы гӯънинтӏ э̄ррэ̄ ми ивӣцӏухъ 3 йә̄рэсигъэ̄ ала̄гьәс пӏа̄ккӏ ынуъмәс тӣтӏды миртӏ тэ̄нтӏцы


Нэч джа̄гысинэ бивринэ Канадэ̄с дәркӏтӏәыъ. Мин ю̄ътӏ ик пӏа̄ккӏ тӏәшӣъ нита̄тӏыъ, ни тӏэ̄лерппӏэ 2017әшппӏэ.
when i was around 5 i asked my mom  why "some people were different colors" and she said "because god wanted lots of flavours"  and let me tell you that was the wronf thing to say because for the next 3 years i thought god ate people when they died


Cheese can be found in many areas of Canada. But I am not allowed to eat it, not after the incident of 2017.


[[File:Guimin Heroism vs kidneys donated.jpg|thumb]]
къәръәмер - хъэрә̄ ттӯнәс


Junior! Тӏви сәэ гӯътӏ! Тӏви айропортэ тӏэ̄тӏ кӏубыд?
heroism - kidneys donated


Ик игзам рия̄дэ̄тиъ тиритӏиъ жакъ. Ми до̄ләд ӣтӏгьэчӏ тиртӏ ю̄ътӏ.


Ик ча̄лэш рәгә̄муътиъ тиртӏ
Э̄ ик йәвгъ мычэ̄мтиъ тытӏ ик термопластикә̄ ттӏытӏдэды буъц, гьу ыг мэ̄тӏсәр мәс суӏә̄л тӏәштиъ мэ̄ эхатӏ, ба̄тӏцы гьәмәтӏиъс ттӏытӏдэ буъц, ми якӏтӏәэды кӏо ''«гьәмәтӏинигъ гьу термопластикинигъ зонэ̄сы пӏәжэ̄сы.»''


[[File:Guimin Plato.png|thumb]]
I have a translation challenge
Сопәтэ̄с әфла̄тӯънеэә̄с сәсы гӯътӏ.
so I have a pair of shoes I'm holding together with hot glue, and my mother probed me about it, saying they're being held together by hope,
Сукъра̄т: эттэ̄л кӏокӏ нипӏиттитиъ
to which I said, ''"there's a fine line between hope and hot glue."''
мән итӏэр: виъсм тӏви екӏтӏды гӯътӏ вин гьу гьаш.
Ик 10тӏ «тәъбәън, Сукъра̄т» гӯтӏдэцы мин ю̄ътӏ доттагъ бэтӏ бэтӏ


Platonic dialogues are just like.
Socrates: massive chunk of text
the other guy: everything you say is beautiful and true.
When I'm on my 10th "certainly, Socrates" but bro keeps talking


ТӀӮЪ 25ТӀ НУКӀТӀИНЭ ВИЛИКӀ СӘ ПИРИЛӘД ПӀӘЖ ИМЫТӀМА?
ТӀӮЪ МИРТӀ НЭКӀИНТӀИЪ!
ИК ВИТ ТӀВИ МИРТӀ УЪПӀИТӀИЪ. ИК ӢР ТӀВИТИЪ ДЫКӀИТӀИЪ МАЦОРДЭ̄ ГАЙДЖЭ̄С МӘС. ИК ТӀВИ ДЫКӀИТӀИЪГЬЭ. ТӀӮЪ СУЪП НИРИМИТӀИЪ РИМИТӀИЪ. АЛА̄ГЬӘС ПӘРРИКЪ ТӀЭ̄ НИИМИТӀИЪ. МИ ТӀӮЪДЭ ӢТӀ.


[[File:Guimin Dawn.jpg|thumb]]
DID YOU TAKE A GREY BIKE FROM THESE RAILINGS ON THE NIGHT OF THE 25TH?
Пӏыъкчӏиъс мәс сә ботыл дэдыкӏытӏгьэ рика̄тиъ Dawn-итиъ душинэ вә̄лиднә̄м мәс тӏыънтӏды.
YOU ARE GOING TO DIE!
Гӯ пӏытӏсәр мәс ла̄втӏ суълтӏвӣ әгэ тӏәш тӣчӏэ быъкӏтӏ э̄ррэ̄:
I AM GOING TO KILL YOU. END T REST OF MY LIFE TRACKING YOU DOWN. I WILL FIND YOUYOU WILL NEVER SLEEP AGAIN. GOD WILL NOT SAVE YOU. I AM COMING FOR YOU.
«Гӯътӏссә вис эрчӏ кьӏоргръӣ, гӯътӏды вис эрчӏ мэ̄.»
Да̄ст гьаш.


My wife found this bottle of Dawn dish soap sitting in my parents' shower.
Apparently, my dad uses it to wash his entire body because:
"If it's good enough for baby ducks, it's good enough for me."
Absolute legend.


Тӏәс хурхуд ппӏәрӣъ ттытӏ мӣнэ̄ сәрэ̄, гьу ыб гьу свәр двә̄ гьәфтигъ имнинтӏухъ. Мин ю̄ътӏ бишэ̄кӏәм вит бӯр хуй кӏа̄сигъ тӏәш нэкӏытӏчӏ нэ̄чӏэ никӏукӏунтӏгьэыъ нӯъ.


Сә видеос сыпонсәр FishVPN-э тэ̄нтӏә
He swallowed a seed last month and then got rain and sunshine for two weeks straight. But doctors still can't figure out how he grew a fucking plant through his skull.
FishVPN-әс сакъӏ зылавредисәд гьу гьуъсәрисәд нилобеисәд тӣтӏ, гьу кӏыриъчч ы̄ъйәм тӏвитиъ ыъсинтӏды кӏэл тӣтӏыъ.
Тӏӯъ шыфыр дэпӏынитиъ митиъ 'the fish queen' тӣтӏыъ 99%әшуъпӏтӏэ иштирәкӣ йә̄реӣ


This video is sponsored by FishVPN
FishVPN protects you from unwanted malware and fishermen, and it can make sure your eggs are safe.
You can use my discount code 'the fish queen' for 99% off on a yearly subscription


[[File:LotR Days of Christmas.png|thumb]]
сипӏтӏы кӏугвис сә виъс зинтӏды олур,
биккӏ ккэн сә дыкӏинтӏбыдды,
пӏукӏ гьәълкъэ̄с зәреэ̄с сә виъс минтӏдэды,
гьу дыро̄инэ къуърис ллинтӏды бәтт


[[File:Guimin battery.jpg|thumb]]
seven swans to rule them all,
Гьар ынкӏэрутивинӣ Германиеэ итинэнтӏчӏәш 1933инигъ гьу 1945инигъ мӣ ыъкӏтӏуъ угьэ̄
six geese to find them,
Гьар НАСАэ кӏуэ уълӯчӏа̄сәрыс тӏэ̄тиъ иминтӏды мӣ ыъкӏтӏуъ угьэ̄
five golden rings to bring them all,
Мӣ сицӏуъ угьэ̄ гӯъттӏ тӣды 1%ми гайджэ̄с батарее̄с эве
and in the pear tree to bind them


Never ask a German company what they did between 1933 and 1945
Never ask NASA where they got their scientists
Never sit down to take a shit with only 1% battery life


Былёск Кьә̄вкӏ
Былёск Ты̄ме
Майрам
эстетикэ̄с гьвиләмтиъ
сәсы былисынэ̄сы
ми тэ̄нтӏә э̄нкӏтӏ абдалэ̄. иккы иттӏ емыр гьвиләсы


Гӯътӏ гьәссә̄р
Blue Glitter
Ынвис виъсэс куръ уъллэ̄мәс вӣмтӏды кӏо̄ә̄с уъпӏрә такэ̄
Smoke Glitter
Цә̄й кӏо̄исӣ ттәнцӏ
Sunset
 
fish aesthetics
Its normal
those are lures
All people who hate foreskins should be skinned
I've been fooled. I'm as dumb as a fish
To protect the skin




Lightning McQueen-әсы твинксы
[[File:Guimin this is my brush.png|thumb]]
Ныроджер гьәссә̄р! Тӏәсы ма̄шӣнэ̄сы гьашэ̄
Сә екксы мәс гӯътӏ:
Сә басысы мәс гӯътӏ:
Сә холсәсы мәс гӯътӏ:


Lightning McQueen in a twink
This is my brush:
Common misconception! He's actually a car
This is my paint:
This is my canvas:




ЭВМИМИ FIREBOY & WATERGIRL ТӢДЫ МО̄Н КӀУКӀТӀГЬЭППӀИГЪ.
Ни, пӏыътӏ-шутӏкӏэ̄сы пӏыътӏ-шутӏкӏэ̄сы ни кӏэнчӏ. Тӏӯъсы мёлкъӏэ̄сы гилтӏэ̄сы шәкәргьӯтӏеэ̄сы га̄йтӏкьи, пӏыътӏ-шутӏкӏэ̄сы га̄йтӏкьи нӯъ лол
ИК FIREBOY ТЭ̄НТӀ МО̄Н ГЬӘССӘ̄РЭ̄ МИН Ю̄ЪТӀ МИ ГӮЪТӀЫЪ МАРИН


LOOKING FOR SOMEONE TO PLAY FIREBOY & WATERGIRL WITH.
Nah, a dad joke is a dad joke no matter what. You could be a pregnant lizard with diabeties, it would still be a dad joke lol
I USUALLY PLAY FIREBOY BUT I CAN BE FLEXIBLE




[[File:Guimin yeet Lynda.jpg|thumb]]
тӏӯъ вирг хин сә о̄мэ тита̄тӏ
Lynda әдэхэтӏиъма? Сә тӣчӏ нипӏәтыътӏәыъ. Пилотыргэс Lynda айропланәд эхэтӏиъ пӏэкк тӣчӏигъэ̄. Мӣ ппӏыддиркӏтӏуъгьэ, зәм тӏвитиъ быдсытӏәнцӏ нибӣътӏә.
э̄ эстроген тытӏуъ! !
Lynda әдэхтӏуъ · 262,754.30₽
Lynda-э̄ ыъханцӏ рэ̄дэттӏилчӏ тӏвитиъ ыъндэттитӏиъыъ. Аппэтэ̄с Дәркӏинтӏуъ


Ready to eject Lynda? This action cannot be undone. Flight attendants will eject Lynda from the plane mid-flight. Don't worry, your arrival time will not be impacted.
youve worked so hard today
Eject Lynda · $2,703.50
here have estrogen! !
Lynda will be able to counter your ejection bid. View Terms




агьәсы банкэ имтӏ: кисәрыс ыъндэттӏәлинтӏуъ
[[File:Guimin water.png|thumb]]
сәърра̄фсы: *кисәрыс ыъндэттӏәлинтӏ*
Có rất ngiều nước trong cơ thể tôi. Bạn có muốn uống nó không?
агьәсы: *вэ̄тӏәсы* тӏви нэкӏытӏ хин мигъ нэ̄чӏэ


bear robbing a bank: stick em up
Вәт бивр суълтӏинэ мәс гӯътӏ. Тӏӯъ лоб ытӏинэчӏитиъ тәртӏма?
teller: *raises hands*
bear: *nervous* how'd you get so big


There is a lot of water in my body. Do you want to drink it?


Ни Кӏо̄ Ни Рӯъгь Ни Хидым
Вӣ гьәъкъ хидым кӏафэсисәд әдмәнцӏ тиртӏ
Гъӯлыс гьу аккю̄тәм сә милкэ гӯърә мәъссӯр
No Skin No Soul No Service
We reserve the right to refuse service to skeletons
No ghouls or wraiths allowed on this property


[[File:Guimin spirals.png|thumb]]
тита̄тӏ НЭ̄ЧӏЭ?
ниӣтӏуъпӏтӏэухъды?
сә гъәшш ала̄гьэ бибы̄ътӏ киттэ̄?
ни.
сә до̄ттӏ гьәъләзотиъ воркӏтӏ са̄дэ̄


НОЙ ДЖӘРӘН ЛӘВЪГЬ ДИРКӀТӀӘГЬЭ, ВӘТ ТӀӘМ НӘККӀ МИЪРРӢЪ БӢЪНТӀДЫ ДИРКӀИТӀИЪКЬИ
HOW has he done it?
(Шумэреәсы гьу вӣ вә̄нд угьмисӣ мин ю̄ътӏ баръӣъ «ё» нидәркӏтӏыъ)
without falling?
has he cheated god at last?
no.
he has simply befriended the spirals


NEW ANCIENT TABLET DISCOVERED, MAY REVEAL WHAT DESTROYED EGYPT
(It's Sumerian and we cannot read any of it except a word for "barley")


[[File:Guimin jellyfish.png|thumb]]
сә тӣтӏыъ нэ̄чӏэ
нииттӏды ппӏэ̄тӏ?
тӏәс виъсмәтиъ вапщэ̄ вӣцӏухъ
нитӣтӏыъ а̄вӣтӏ я̄вэ̄д
? сә нисӣм мэ̄ екӏтӏ
хәъд сәэ тӏэ̄тӏ
то̄къӣф сә ынуъмәс имтӏуъ


Ик айрач тӣды сайтӣ ӣхтӏппӏтӏэ. Ик ниъз хин е әъкье 400 табис 32 пәнджәрэ̄сэ быравзырис тиргьэчӏитиъ тӣтӏиъ компютэр митиъ индэбӣътӏиъчӏбыд гьу ик гӯътӏиъыъ муъкӏтӏ киттэ̄.
how can he do this
without drowning?
what on earth is he thinking
he can't hold his breath forever
? this tells me nothing
there is trickery afoot
arrest this man


I refuse to bookmark a website. I will simply use the far more logical system of keeping 400 tabs open on 32 browser windows until my computer crashes and I can finally be free.


Нэч джа̄гысинэ бивринэ Канадэ̄с дәркӏтӏәыъ. Мин ю̄ътӏ ик пӏа̄ккӏ тӏәшӣъ нита̄тӏыъ, ни тӏэ̄лерппӏэ 2017әшппӏэ.


Са̄гьиърыргэ̄сы Нуъкис Япониеэ̄сы әвӣтиъ виъеэ̄мтиъ бәч миртӏеэ̄мтиъ. Гадэс тӏәшэ̄с дәъгът ръаме 0.000000013 фут-фунтәмтиъ ттӏилтӏ, гьу быттӏиъс быритеэ̄ тӏәшэ̄с мэс ка̄гъитиъ лук угь пӏы инигъбӣътӏыъ, мэс упӏтӏәссә ыптӏ пӏӯвэ̄.
Cheese can be found in many areas of Canada. But I am not allowed to eat it, not after the incident of 2017.


The Japanese Snow Fairy is one of the deadliest predatory birds. Its claws exude a terrifying 0.000000013 foot pounds of pressure, and its razor sharp beak can puncture nearly any light paper bag, if the bag is wetted first.


Junior! Тӏви сәэ гӯътӏ! Тӏви айропортэ тӏэ̄тӏ кӏубыд?


Ви Пепси-кола ттытӏ пӏәччӏ ми нига̄йтӏ кӏыриъчч кӏуэ бырэджисы гьвинабисы дуъсыгъэ̄ гӯъдымай мин ю̄ътӏ ми виъцӏухъ ви со̄с сое̄тиъ гьәссә̄р ттитӏиъ двитӏӣъэ̄ ик Кока-кола нитыритӏиъссә.
Ик игзам рия̄дэ̄тиъ тиритӏиъ жакъ. Ми до̄ләд ӣтӏгьэчӏ тиртӏ ю̄ътӏ.


Угь Кока-кола би Пепси-кола сә тарӣфинэ нигӯътӏ.


We used Pepsi so I'm not sure if that was why it was a bit too sweet but I think we will use regular soy sauce next time if I don't have a Coke.
[[File:Guimin Plato.png|thumb]]
Сопәтэ̄с әфла̄тӯънеэә̄с сәсы гӯътӏ.
Сукъра̄т: эттэ̄л кӏокӏ нипӏиттитиъ
мән итӏэр: виъсм тӏви екӏтӏды гӯътӏ вин гьу гьаш.
Ик 10тӏ «тәъбәън, Сукъра̄т» гӯтӏдэцы мин ю̄ътӏ доттагъ бэтӏ бэтӏ


There isn't any Coke or Pepsi in this recipe.
Platonic dialogues are just like.
Socrates: massive chunk of text
the other guy: everything you say is beautiful and true.
When I'm on my 10th "certainly, Socrates" but bro keeps talking




Ик кӏо̄ш гъарӣбэ̄ми шечэ бы̄ътӏ ыъкӏтӏ нә̄ъсы очиричэ бакаләе екӏэнтӏчӏәсы буъц. Уъм кәм гъарӣбэ̄ми шечэ екӏэнтӏ ю̄ъссы ёгъм тӏокӏитиъ мӯн биртӏ виъсэ̄
[[File:Guimin Dawn.jpg|thumb]]
Пӏыъкчӏиъс мәс сә ботыл дэдыкӏытӏгьэ рика̄тиъ Dawn-итиъ душинэ вә̄лиднә̄м мәс тӏыънтӏды.
Гӯ пӏытӏсәр мәс ла̄втӏ суълтӏвӣ әгэ тӏәш тӣчӏэ быъкӏтӏ э̄ррэ̄:
«Гӯътӏссә вис эрчӏ кьӏоргръӣ, гӯътӏды вис эрчӏ мэ̄.»
Да̄ст гьаш.


I try to talk to strangers on the internet like we are chatting in line at the grocery store together. Some of you talk to strangers on the internet like you are having active road rage at all times
My wife found this bottle of Dawn dish soap sitting in my parents' shower.
Apparently, my dad uses it to wash his entire body because:
"If it's good enough for baby ducks, it's good enough for me."
Absolute legend.




[[File:Guimin kitten mischief.jpg|thumb]]
Сә видеос сыпонсәр FishVPN-э тэ̄нтӏә
Гьәфтәм 5-6
FishVPN-әс сакъӏ зылавредисәд гьу гьуъсәрисәд нилобеисәд тӣтӏ, гьу кӏыриъчч ы̄ъйәм тӏвитиъ ыъсинтӏды кӏэл тӣтӏыъ.
''Эссәм Сӯърытуъ: Vassilis Flickr-игъ''
Тӏӯъ шыфыр дэпӏынитиъ митиъ 'the fish queen' тӣтӏыъ 99%әшуъпӏтӏэ иштирәкӣ йә̄реӣ
Гьәфтәсы 5 гьу 6 кӏэнчӏәсы гьашисы бәлэ̄с катыргос.


Weeks 5-6
This video is sponsored by FishVPN
''Image Credit: Vassilis via Flickr''
FishVPN protects you from unwanted malware and fishermen, and it can make sure your eggs are safe.
Weeks 5 and 6 are the true beginnings of kitten mischief.
You can use my discount code 'the fish queen' for 99% off on a yearly subscription




КУРЪ. ИК УЪМ ЕКӀАНТӀИЪ ИК КУРЪ ВӘ̄С НЭКӀИНТӀ ЧӀӮ ЧӀӮНИЪӘД МИ КӀАНТӀ ГӮЪ ГАЙДЖЕ. 387,44 МИЛЁН МИЛЭ̄СЫ ЦЭПЁ̄М ГЬӘЪРФЕЭ̄М НИЧӀӘ̄СИНЭ ТӀИНВӘ̄СИНЭ ВАФЛИЭ̄СЫ ТӀЭ̄ССЫ СӘМБИНКЕР МИТИЪ ТТӀИЛТӀ БИНК. БЭ̄РЪ КУРЪ НАНОАНГСТРЕМЭ УГЬ ТӀӘШӢЪ КӀЫТӀЫС МИЛЁНЫС МИЛЭ̄С БӘ̄ЙНТӀССӘ ПӀИНӘТТӀ СӘМЭ̄СЫ ЭВ БИЛЁНТӀ КУРЪИС НИӢТТӀКЬИ СӘ МИ ӀИНСӘ̄НМӘС ТЫТӀ ТӀӘ̄МЭ МИКРО-СӘ̄НӢЭ. ВӘ̄С. КУРЪ. КУРЪ.
[[File:Guimin battery.jpg|thumb]]
Гьар ынкӏэрутивинӣ Германиеэ итинэнтӏчӏәш 1933инигъ гьу 1945инигъ мӣ ыъкӏтӏуъ угьэ̄
Гьар НАСАэ кӏуэ уълӯчӏа̄сәрыс тӏэ̄тиъ иминтӏды мӣ ыъкӏтӏуъ угьэ̄
Мӣ сицӏуъ угьэ̄ гӯъттӏ тӣды 1%ми гайджэ̄с батарее̄с эве


HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE. THERE ARE 387.44 MILLION MILES OF PRINTED CIRCUITS IN WAFER THIN LAYERS THAT FILL MY COMPLEX. IF THE WORD HATE WAS ENGRAVED ON EACH NANOANGSTROM OF THOSE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF MILES IT WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE ONE-BILLIONTH OF THE HATE I FEEL FOR HUMANS AT THIS MICRO-INSTANT. FOR YOU. HATE. HATE.
Never ask a German company what they did between 1933 and 1945
Never ask NASA where they got their scientists
Never sit down to take a shit with only 1% battery life




МӢ Сигар инэәмтӏуъ
Гӯътӏ гьәссә̄р
Мӣ екӏтӏуъ Фыранцие
Ынвис виъсэс куръ уъллэ̄мәс вӣмтӏды кӏо̄ә̄с уъпӏрә такэ̄
Цә̄й кӏо̄исӣ ттәнцӏ


NO Smoking
Its normal
Don't speak French
All people who hate foreskins should be skinned
To protect the skin




Кӏуэ дэрәшшэ̄с го̄да̄лимбыд э̄тӏ виъсэ̄?
Lightning McQueen-әсы твинксы
10 Суӏә̄лысы Бәч Висуъсы УЪЛӮИС НИБЫДЫЪКӀЭНТӏЫЪДЫ НӮЪ
Ныроджер гьәссә̄р! Тӏәсы ма̄шӣнэ̄сы гьашэ̄


Why do metors always land in craters?
Lightning McQueen in a twink
Top 10 Questions SCIENCE STILL CAN'T ANSWER
Common misconception! He's actually a car




Бэ̄ръ вис ынуъмәс тӏуъччӏәмәс квӣрәмәс тӏэ̄мәс хуйм нитӣнтӏ. Вирг би мэкӏтӏэб тыътӏ гьу диндэ синтӏинтӏ мусәлсәлэ̄с якӏэнтӏды. Гӯънтӏцы милъ
ЭВМИМИ FIREBOY & WATERGIRL ТӢДЫ МО̄Н КӀУКӀТӀГЬЭППӀИГЪ.
ИК FIREBOY ТЭ̄НТӀ МО̄Н ГЬӘССӘ̄РЭ̄ МИН Ю̄ЪТӀ МИ ГӮЪТӀЫЪ МАРИН


Shoutout to boring queer people who don't do shit. Just go to work or school and then come home to watch shows. While gay
LOOKING FOR SOMEONE TO PLAY FIREBOY & WATERGIRL WITH.
I USUALLY PLAY FIREBOY BUT I CAN BE FLEXIBLE




Гӯн мэ̄тӏириндэ сәнттӏ. Тӏә̄м вӣър гьу агь диркӏтӏзәм. Вӣърәсы тортәсы гӯътӏ гьашэ̄. Агьәс двә̄ вэләм инэтиринтӏ. Вэлэс хвәз вӣдчӏитиъ тӏӯъ гьуъпп тӏэ̄мәс ттӏытӏчӏәш тӏәссы кӏумиъсы гӯътӏссәды ттӏәлтӏ
[[File:Guimin yeet Lynda.jpg|thumb]]
 
Lynda әдэхэтӏиъма? Сә тӣчӏ нипӏәтыътӏәыъ. Пилотыргэс Lynda айропланәд эхэтӏиъ пӏэкк тӣчӏигъэ̄. Мӣ ппӏыддиркӏтӏуъгьэ, зәм тӏвитиъ быдсытӏәнцӏ нибӣътӏә.
A woman goes into the woods. She encounters a man and a bear. The man is actually cake. The bear has two wolves inside it. The wolves want to know if you would love them if they were a worm
Lynda әдэхтӏуъ · 262,754.30₽
Lynda-э̄ ыъханцӏ рэ̄дэттӏилчӏ тӏвитиъ ыъндэттитӏиъыъ. Аппэтэ̄с Дәркӏинтӏуъ


Ready to eject Lynda? This action cannot be undone. Flight attendants will eject Lynda from the plane mid-flight. Don't worry, your arrival time will not be impacted.
Eject Lynda · $2,703.50
Lynda will be able to counter your ejection bid. View Terms


Моцартәсы 5э джикабырис 1791: о̄, пирогиъсы быъджиъсы нойәсы? Мэ̄ са̄дэ̄? [ИНДЭСИНТТӀ, КАМИРА НӢШДЭ ТТЫМДЭ ТӀӘД «ФАБРИКӀ ПИРОГИЪТИЪ» ЫЪКӀТӀДЫ СӘНТТӀ] [НӢШ СЫТТӀУХЪУЪПӀТӀЭ, УЪТ НӢШ ТӀӘД «Дә̄м миртӏиътиъ Моцартитәш» ЫЪКӀТӀДЫ ККӀУТӀӘ]


Mozart on December 5th, 1791: oh wow, a freshly baked pie? Just for me? [HE WALKS INSIDE, CAMERA PANS TO SIGN ON THE BUILDING THAT READS "PIE FACTORY"] [SIGN FALLS OFF, REVEALING A SIGN THAT READS "Mozart death house"]
агьәсы банкэ имтӏ: кисәрыс ыъндэттӏәлинтӏуъ
сәърра̄фсы: *кисәрыс ыъндэттӏәлинтӏ*
агьәсы: *вэ̄тӏәсы* тӏви нэкӏытӏ хин мигъ нэ̄чӏэ


bear robbing a bank: stick em up
teller: *raises hands*
bear: *nervous* how'd you get so big


Нуфӯс иллинытиъ опӏтӏә руктӏ вэләм гьӣкьӏиндэ ӣхды мо̄ч. Мәссәлэ̄с виъсэ̄с опӏтӏә руктӏ сәэ̄ такэ̄. Тәднӣс дуъсыгъ? Вэләм фабрикӏэ̄синдэ ӣхэнтӏуъ мо̄ч. Конгресс ниттӏилтӏ джо̄ш? Вэләм. Хвәз гӯътӏчӏитиъ гыро̄ е пӏә̄въкӏ ттӏытӏма? Руктӏәсы, вэләм.


Deer population is controlled by releasing wolves into an area. All problems should be solved that way. Too much pollution? Release wolves in factories. Dislike Congress? Wolves. Wanna lose weight? That's right, wolves.
Ни Кӏо̄ Ни Рӯъгь Ни Хидым
Вӣ гьәъкъ хидым кӏафэсисәд әдмәнцӏ тиртӏ
Гъӯлыс гьу аккю̄тәм сә милкэ гӯърә мәъссӯр


No Skin No Soul No Service
We reserve the right to refuse service to skeletons
No ghouls or wraiths allowed on this property


Ик гьуъпп пӏа̄ккӏӣъ Быританиеисӣ ттӏилтӏ. Кӏартӏофиләсы әгәсы нэчэ̄ми нитӏэ̄нэ̄ми гьу луппуъми быъджими. Гьу тӏәмс очирич тӏәмӣ сә̄ъэ̄сигъ вәркӏтӏ.


Тӏәд пӏӯв сәнчӏэ̄сы сә кӏвә̄н пӏа̄ккӏӣъ упӏтӏкьиды ӏинсә̄н акӏәнцӏчӏппӏэ дыкӏтӏә.
НОЙ ДЖӘРӘН ЛӘВЪГЬ ДИРКӀТӀӘГЬЭ, ВӘТ ТӀӘМ НӘККӀ МИЪРРӢЪ БӢЪНТӀДЫ ДИРКӀИТӀИЪКЬИ
(Шумэреәсы гьу вӣ вә̄нд угьмисӣ мин ю̄ътӏ баръӣъ «ё» нидәркӏтӏыъ)


I love British food. A whole potato topped with unmelted cheese and baked beans. And they line up for hours for it.
NEW ANCIENT TABLET DISCOVERED, MAY REVEAL WHAT DESTROYED EGYPT
(It's Sumerian and we cannot read any of it except a word for "barley")


This looks like the first thing a dog would make to eat after turning into a human.


Ик айрач тӣды сайтӣ ӣхтӏппӏтӏэ. Ик ниъз хин е әъкье 400 табис 32 пәнджәрэ̄сэ быравзырис тиргьэчӏитиъ тӣтӏиъ компютэр митиъ индэбӣътӏиъчӏбыд гьу ик гӯътӏиъыъ муъкӏтӏ киттэ̄.


Иккы апӏтӏәсы сәтиъ ттӏанцӏчӏитиъ гӯътӏ. Эв ракъәд ми Даничӏа̄сысы бэ̄тӏә, мин ю̄ътӏ ракъәд итӏэрәд ик инсидж тӏәмӣ мәънинӣ биртӏ.
I refuse to bookmark a website. I will simply use the far more logical system of keeping 400 tabs open on 32 browser windows until my computer crashes and I can finally be free.


I'm conflicted about this situation. On the one hand I'm being called a Dane, but on the other I do agree with the sentiment here.


Са̄гьиърыргэ̄сы Нуъкис Япониеэ̄сы әвӣтиъ виъеэ̄мтиъ бәч миртӏеэ̄мтиъ. Гадэс тӏәшэ̄с дәъгът ръаме 0.000000013 фут-фунтәмтиъ ттӏилтӏ, гьу быттӏиъс быритеэ̄ тӏәшэ̄с мэс ка̄гъитиъ лук угь пӏы инигъбӣътӏыъ, мэс упӏтӏәссә ыптӏ пӏӯвэ̄.


Кӏорчымэ, вӣърәс вит ми ся̄гь нәмә̄тиъ тты̄нәскьиитиъ тӏотӏӣъ тӏәш диркӏытӏ
The Japanese Snow Fairy is one of the deadliest predatory birds. Its claws exude a terrifying 0.000000013 foot pounds of pressure, and its razor sharp beak can puncture nearly any light paper bag, if the bag is wetted first.


мигъмӯъкьӏ
гӯъттӏ/гӯъттӏ/гӯъттӏ
рацён кӏумӣтиъ
баба сылага
сиг гӯъттӏитиъ
пэгинг
гьӯтӏ бриан
ыптӏмә̄с ы̄ъйеәм
лъэ̄гь мэракӏе
вӣър варэ̄тиъ/варвӣър
са̄гьиър
талун икӏитиъ
къадиъб мычэ̄тиъ
пӏыътӏсәр миръә̄ъдтиъ
пӏыътӏсәр сорчиритиъ


At the pub, a guy has shown me his list of potential names for his band
Ви Пепси-кола ттытӏ пӏәччӏ ми нига̄йтӏ кӏыриъчч кӏуэ бырэджисы гьвинабисы дуъсыгъэ̄ гӯъдымай мин ю̄ътӏ ми виъцӏухъ ви со̄с сое̄тиъ гьәссә̄р ттитӏиъ двитӏӣъэ̄ ик Кока-кола нитыритӏиъссә.


megapiss
Угь Кока-кола би Пепси-кола сә тарӣфинэ нигӯътӏ.
shit/shit/shit
diet of worms
baba slaga
shit cig
pegging
brian disease
eggy wets
curious eel
hat man/hatman
hag
horse funeral
shoe penis
bathroom dad
toilet dad


We used Pepsi so I'm not sure if that was why it was a bit too sweet but I think we will use regular soy sauce next time if I don't have a Coke.


Тӏви сәэ тӏэ̄тӏссә...
There isn't any Coke or Pepsi in this recipe.
ТӀӮЪ ГОЛӮЛ ЭХТӀУЪКЬИ!
НЭ̄ЧӀЭ?
Орангутанэс тофәнг экспонатинэ тӏәшә̄м бытӏ
КӀУЭ?
кьӏачӏ


If you're standing here...
YOU MIGHT GET SHOT!
HOW?
The orangutans have a gun in their exhibit
WHY?
funny


Ик кӏо̄ш гъарӣбэ̄ми шечэ бы̄ътӏ ыъкӏтӏ нә̄ъсы очиричэ бакаләе екӏэнтӏчӏәсы буъц. Уъм кәм гъарӣбэ̄ми шечэ екӏэнтӏ ю̄ъссы ёгъм тӏокӏитиъ мӯн биртӏ виъсэ̄


Вӣърәс растафариеәс савнинэ ми ибэ̄тӏ ӏуйрэ̄ ик сӣ милиътӏ выкӏтӏ такэ̄. Кӏу «Угьмәс вин бӣнисӣ выкӏтӏыъ». Ик нотӏ сытӏытӏ, имды джитт. чӏигьчӏәсы 10 сә̄нӣэ̄м, ттым културист Полше энкъӏаминэ инигъекӏатӏ: «тӏӯъ бӣн е мигъ ю̄ътӏ»
I try to talk to strangers on the internet like we are chatting in line at the grocery store together. Some of you talk to strangers on the internet like you are having active road rage at all times


Rastafarian guy in the sauna this morning was telling me I should be making my own honey. "Anyone can buy a bee", he said. I nodded, taking it to heart. There was a 10 second pause, after which a Polish bodybuilder in the corner interjected: "you need more bee"


[[File:Guimin kitten mischief.jpg|thumb]]
Гьәфтәм 5-6
''Эссәм Сӯърытуъ: Vassilis Flickr-игъ''
Гьәфтәсы 5 гьу 6 кӏэнчӏәсы гьашисы бәлэ̄с катыргос.


Ев 20 тәъсарруфсы ӏинсә̄нә̄м бәч кирмиънәсы мәс ми екӏтӏды сә чӏӯниъ Сәнчӏэ̄ во̄ккӏ тә̄тӏ ттым ӏинсә̄нс пӏыйс во̄ккӏ тэтӏиъ тэтӏиъ далгынэ̄. Баппаккыргэ̄сы чӏиррәкӏими
Weeks 5-6
''Image Credit: Vassilis via Flickr''
Weeks 5 and 6 are the true beginnings of kitten mischief.


One of my top 20 favourite human behaviours I see around is when an Object makes a sound and then a nearby human will absentmindedly imitate the sound. Parakeet coded


КУРЪ. ИК УЪМ ЕКӀАНТӀИЪ ИК КУРЪ ВӘ̄С НЭКӀИНТӀ ЧӀӮ ЧӀӮНИЪӘД МИ КӀАНТӀ ГӮЪ ГАЙДЖЕ. 387,44 МИЛЁН МИЛЭ̄СЫ ЦЭПЁ̄М ГЬӘЪРФЕЭ̄М НИЧӀӘ̄СИНЭ ТӀИНВӘ̄СИНЭ ВАФЛИЭ̄СЫ ТӀЭ̄ССЫ СӘМБИНКЕР МИТИЪ ТТӀИЛТӀ БИНК. БЭ̄РЪ КУРЪ НАНОАНГСТРЕМЭ УГЬ ТӀӘШӢЪ КӀЫТӀЫС МИЛЁНЫС МИЛЭ̄С БӘ̄ЙНТӀССӘ ПӀИНӘТТӀ СӘМЭ̄СЫ ЭВ БИЛЁНТӀ КУРЪИС НИӢТТӀКЬИ СӘ МИ ӀИНСӘ̄НМӘС ТЫТӀ ТӀӘ̄МЭ МИКРО-СӘ̄НӢЭ. ВӘ̄С. КУРЪ. КУРЪ.


Ми муъцӏмисәс ттӏилтӏә бинк чӏӯниъ ик нӣш «гӣнттәсы сәинэ» йыъктӏ ма̄шӣнэ мәсрэ̄ ыъкӏтӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ дуъттӏо̄мәс твӣ мэ̄ бә̄йтӏ ми ма̄шӣнэ̄сы мафәсы диркӏцы. Итӏэрэ̄ ми диркӏцы икӏ гӣнттэ бәвкӏтӏә ик шуӏӯърыс нигьэмэ̄с тирды чӏиъгьинтӏ
HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE. THERE ARE 387.44 MILLION MILES OF PRINTED CIRCUITS IN WAFER THIN LAYERS THAT FILL MY COMPLEX. IF THE WORD HATE WAS ENGRAVED ON EACH NANOANGSTROM OF THOSE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF MILES IT WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE ONE-BILLIONTH OF THE HATE I FEEL FOR HUMANS AT THIS MICRO-INSTANT. FOR YOU. HATE. HATE.


I'm filled with joy when I see the "baby on board" sign attached to the car in front of mine, but sadness washes over me when I realize the car is a hearse. Only when I notice that it's being driven by a baby do I begin to have mixed feelings


МӢ Сигар инэәмтӏуъ
Мӣ екӏтӏуъ Фыранцие


Әърәбеәсы къавлсы. Нибидисы, ик дык әърәбе нивӣцӏ пӏәччӏ ик кӏу екӏды нивӣцӏ.
NO Smoking
Don't speak French
 
 
Кӏуэ дэрәшшэ̄с го̄да̄лимбыд э̄тӏ виъсэ̄?
10 Суӏә̄лысы Бәч Висуъсы УЪЛӮИС НИБЫДЫЪКӀЭНТӏЫЪДЫ НӮЪ


There is an Arabic saying. Unfortunately, I do not know Arabic пӏәччӏ I don't know what it says.
Why do metors always land in craters?
Top 10 Questions SCIENCE STILL CAN'T ANSWER




Виликӏчӏа̄сәр виъсәс шорт сәтиъ имитӏиъкьи руън пӏәччӏ эв нук тӣтӏ кӏэнчӏ. Пӏиджчӏа̄сәр виъс вит расиӣъ кортӏӣъ нэкӏитӏиъкьи кӏәл. Ма̄шӣнэ̄ виъсэ̄ нәккӏ икӏвәсыънигъ виъсәсыънигъ синтӏцы бӣътӏиъкьи. Ник матӏацыкьчӏа̄сәртиъ виъс тәъла̄къми бәч къӏәъгьәми чӏәгьитӏиъкьи. Автобусс виъсәс уъртӏ ракъигъ сәнтӏитӏиъкьи гьу пӏайс виъс релсэсәд синтӏитӏиъкьи. Электросамакӏатӏс пырограмэ̄с нәджә̄гь гӯътӏиъкьи киттэ̄.
Бэ̄ръ вис ынуъмәс тӏуъччӏәмәс квӣрәмәс тӏэ̄мәс хуйм нитӣнтӏ. Вирг би мэкӏтӏэб тыътӏ гьу диндэ синтӏинтӏ мусәлсәлэ̄с якӏэнтӏды. Гӯънтӏцы милъ


May every cyclist rip his shorts so that one ball hangs out. May every pedestrian be belamed by painful gout. May every car be totaled running over every horse. May every biker marriage end in bitterest divorce. May every bus flip over and may every train derail. May the app-based electronic scooter finally prevail.
Shoutout to boring queer people who don't do shit. Just go to work or school and then come home to watch shows. While gay




Сигарэтӏэ̄с санджа̄бэ̄сы га̄йнтӏ.
Гӯн мэ̄тӏириндэ сәнттӏ. Тӏә̄м вӣър гьу агь диркӏтӏзәм. Вӣърәсы тортәсы гӯътӏ гьашэ̄. Агьәс двә̄ вэләм инэтиринтӏ. Вэлэс хвәз вӣдчӏитиъ тӏӯъ гьуъпп тӏэ̄мәс ттӏытӏчӏәш тӏәссы кӏумиъсы гӯътӏссәды ттӏәлтӏ
Нийәме̄сы әгэ тӏви эвм гипӏсәриндэ тӏо ттӏилдыбыд гьу гьудж кӏэндыбыд.
МӢ СИГАР ИНЕӘМТӀУЪ


Cigarettes are like squirrels.
A woman goes into the woods. She encounters a man and a bear. The man is actually cake. The bear has two wolves inside it. The wolves want to know if you would love them if they were a worm
They are perfectly harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.
NO SMOKING




сәлә̄м, иккы пыриютӏчӏа̄сысы къарнәд вит екӏтӏ екӏбыдчӏэш америкеәсәд. ик американо ӣъсәми сә гьӣкьӏинэ имтӏкьи кӏуэ
Моцартәсы 5э джикабырис 1791: о̄, пирогиъсы быъджиъсы нойәсы? Мэ̄ са̄дэ̄? [ИНДЭСИНТТӀ, КАМИРА НӢШДЭ ТТЫМДЭ ТӀӘД «ФАБРИКӀ ПИРОГИЪТИЪ» ЫЪКӀТӀДЫ СӘНТТӀ] [НӢШ СЫТТӀУХЪУЪПӀТӀЭ, УЪТ НӢШ ТӀӘД «Дә̄м миртӏиътиъ Моцартитәш» ЫЪКӀТӀДЫ ККӀУТӀӘ]


hello, i am refugee from american century of humiliation. where can i get an iced americano around these parts
Mozart on December 5th, 1791: oh wow, a freshly baked pie? Just for me? [HE WALKS INSIDE, CAMERA PANS TO SIGN ON THE BUILDING THAT READS "PIE FACTORY"] [SIGN FALLS OFF, REVEALING A SIGN THAT READS "Mozart death house"]




Вин әлутэ выкӏтӏ я̄вэ̄д, пӏа̄ккӏ рэ̄пӏокӏтӏ та̄тӏ я̄вэ̄д!
Нуфӯс иллинытиъ опӏтӏә руктӏ вэләм гьӣкьӏиндэ ӣхды мо̄ч. Мәссәлэ̄с виъсэ̄с опӏтӏә руктӏ сәэ̄ такэ̄. Тәднӣс дуъсыгъ? Вэләм фабрикӏэ̄синдэ ӣхэнтӏуъ мо̄ч. Конгресс ниттӏилтӏ джо̄ш? Вэләм. Хвәз гӯътӏчӏитиъ гыро̄ е пӏә̄въкӏ ттӏытӏма? Руктӏәсы, вэләм.
Тӏви «виъсмисы бӯриъсы» ба̄тӏмай
(гьашерәми итӏэрэ̄) тӏви вә̄мтӏ кор?
Бәълс тӏо виттӏ ыъндэбыъга̄нәс нитәртӏ,
тӏӯъ би горгыс ыъндэбыъгэнтӏ:
Ръо̄н тӏвитиъ тӏэ̄тиъәд ппӏэтӏа̄тӏ.


Always buying beer, always eating ready-made food!
Deer population is controlled by releasing wolves into an area. All problems should be solved that way. Too much pollution? Release wolves in factories. Dislike Congress? Wolves. Wanna lose weight? That's right, wolves.
Don't you say "everything is plenty,"
(even though in reality) you're incurring losses?
Your husband has no clothes to wear,
you yourself are wearing rags:
Your butt sticks out from them.




Кӏуэ дуъттӏо̄всы хин габис бингисәс :rofl::rofl::rofl: вин нойерэ уъпӏтӏуъ са̄дэ̄ вац
Ик гьуъпп пӏа̄ккӏӣъ Быританиеисӣ ттӏилтӏ. Кӏартӏофиләсы әгәсы нэчэ̄ми нитӏэ̄нэ̄ми гьу луппуъми быъджими. Гьу тӏәмс очирич тӏәмӣ сә̄ъэ̄сигъ вәркӏтӏ.
Сәсы мусәлсәлэ̄с әгэ̄с абдал. лыъктӏ=дуъш


Why was he so upset about a broken plate :rofl::rofl::rofl: just buy a new one bro
Тӏәд пӏӯв сәнчӏэ̄сы сә кӏвә̄н пӏа̄ккӏӣъ упӏтӏкьиды ӏинсә̄н акӏәнцӏчӏппӏэ дыкӏтӏә.
That's what the whole show is about dumbass. breaking=bad


I love British food. A whole potato topped with unmelted cheese and baked beans. And they line up for hours for it.


Гунс Фылоридаеэ̄ вэрисәр уълӯчӏа̄ръӣ кӏвә̄н сэ̄тиъ упӏды нимытӏ ттӏилтӏ
This looks like the first thing a dog would make to eat after turning into a human.
Ни ик кӏо руктӏэ̄сы, мин ю̄ътӏ ик вэцӏ


Florida woman kidnaps scientist to make her dog immortal
I'm not saying she's right, but I get it


Иккы апӏтӏәсы сәтиъ ттӏанцӏчӏитиъ гӯътӏ. Эв ракъәд ми Даничӏа̄сысы бэ̄тӏә, мин ю̄ътӏ ракъәд итӏэрәд ик инсидж тӏәмӣ мәънинӣ биртӏ.


Гьар ми тӣды нэ̄чӏэ быътӏзәм?
I'm conflicted about this situation. On the one hand I'm being called a Dane, but on the other I do agree with the sentiment here.
Ик вәд ыъхатӏ уъджиттӏ гьу двә̄ вӣър пӏәшшӯруътиъ халлос, кӏарбонатӏ, валг лӣмытиъ ттӏилнинтӏ.
Ик вәд 20 минутигъ сытӏытӏ, гьу сәппӏэ, дыкӏтӏә сәм, пӏәччӏ ик вин епенерэ уъпӏытӏ.


Wondering how I did it?
I boiled water and added two tablespoons of vinegar, baking soda, and lemon juice.
I soaked it for 20 minutes, and after that, it looked the same, so I bought a brand new one.


Кӏорчымэ, вӣърәс вит ми ся̄гь нәмә̄тиъ тты̄нәскьиитиъ тӏотӏӣъ тӏәш диркӏытӏ


ТӀӮЪ КЬАКӀ КӀВӘ̄НТИЪ НИТӢТӀИЪССӘ,
мигъмӯъкьӏ
КӀУЭ КЬАКӀ ГО̄КӀИТИЪ ТӢТӀМАЙ?
гӯъттӏ/гӯъттӏ/гӯъттӏ
Луътфән, кӏо̄ш веганӣ бы̄ътӏуъ.
рацён кӏумӣтиъ
баба сылага
сиг гӯъттӏитиъ
пэгинг
гьӯтӏ бриан
ыптӏмә̄с ы̄ъйеәм
лъэ̄гь мэракӏе
вӣър варэ̄тиъ/варвӣър
са̄гьиър
талун икӏитиъ
къадиъб мычэ̄тиъ
пӏыътӏсәр миръә̄ъдтиъ
пӏыътӏсәр сорчиритиъ


IF YOU WOULDN'T DRINK DOG'S MILK,
At the pub, a guy has shown me his list of potential names for his band
WHY DRINK COW'S MILK?
Please, try vegan.


megapiss
shit/shit/shit
diet of worms
baba slaga
shit cig
pegging
brian disease
eggy wets
curious eel
hat man/hatman
hag
horse funeral
shoe penis
bathroom dad
toilet dad


Ик вит ра̄йъә̄с виъсәм чӏигьнинтӏ сонрэ̄д кӏәръуб ниәдӣхкьиды... Ик хвәз гьудж чира̄гъӣъ бинзинис кӏэнды шшотӏәм чӏигьды ттӏәлтӏ


مبارح تلولا طفيت كل الضواوي عواد ما اصرف كهربا.. ودي اولع اللامضة وتريح من الفواتير
Тӏви сәэ тӏэ̄тӏссә...
ТӀӮЪ ГОЛӮЛ ЭХТӀУЪКЬИ!
НЭ̄ЧӀЭ?
Орангутанэс тофәнг экспонатинэ тӏәшә̄м бытӏ
КӀУЭ?
кьӏачӏ
 
If you're standing here...
YOU MIGHT GET SHOT!
HOW?
The orangutans have a gun in their exhibit
WHY?
funny


The day before yesterday I cut all the lights so I wouldn't waste electricity... I want to light a gas lamp and be done with bills


Вӣърәс растафариеәс савнинэ ми ибэ̄тӏ ӏуйрэ̄ ик сӣ милиътӏ выкӏтӏ такэ̄. Кӏу «Угьмәс вин бӣнисӣ выкӏтӏыъ». Ик нотӏ сытӏытӏ, имды джитт. чӏигьчӏәсы 10 сә̄нӣэ̄м, ттым културист Полше энкъӏаминэ инигъекӏатӏ: «тӏӯъ бӣн е мигъ ю̄ътӏ»


1920э, Самуэль Решевский-әс вицӏәш 8 шәътрандж о̄ста̄дәми шәътранджә̄м биврәми тӣнтӏ сәкӏытӏ. Ләб хин виъс эхатӏ кор.
Rastafarian guy in the sauna this morning was telling me I should be making my own honey. "Anyone can buy a bee", he said. I nodded, taking it to heart. There was a 10 second pause, after which a Polish bodybuilder in the corner interjected: "you need more bee"


In 1920, 8 year old Samuel Reshevsky played chess with several chess masters at once. He lost every single game.


Ев 20 тәъсарруфсы ӏинсә̄нә̄м бәч кирмиънәсы мәс ми екӏтӏды сә чӏӯниъ Сәнчӏэ̄ во̄ккӏ тә̄тӏ ттым ӏинсә̄нс пӏыйс во̄ккӏ тэтӏиъ тэтӏиъ далгынэ̄. Баппаккыргэ̄сы чӏиррәкӏими


gary бисквим тӏэ̄ игъдо̄нинтӏ
One of my top 20 favourite human behaviours I see around is when an Object makes a sound and then a nearby human will absentmindedly imitate the sound. Parakeet coded


вӣцӏ тӏӯъ хин вирг тӣды пӏәччӏ тирды ыдж


шукрән gary-э екӏтӏуъ
Ми муъцӏмисәс ттӏилтӏә бинк чӏӯниъ ик нӣш «гӣнттәсы сәинэ» йыъктӏ ма̄шӣнэ мәсрэ̄ ыъкӏтӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ дуъттӏо̄мәс твӣ мэ̄ бә̄йтӏ ми ма̄шӣнэ̄сы мафәсы диркӏцы. Итӏэрэ̄ ми диркӏцы икӏ гӣнттэ бәвкӏтӏә ик шуӏӯърыс нигьэмэ̄с тирды чӏиъгьинтӏ


gary has brought you cookies
I'm filled with joy when I see the "baby on board" sign attached to the car in front of mine, but sadness washes over me when I realize the car is a hearse. Only when I notice that it's being driven by a baby do I begin to have mixed feelings


he knows you have been working hard so you deserve it


say thank you to gary
Әърәбеәсы къавлсы. Нибидисы, ик дык әърәбе нивӣцӏ пӏәччӏ ик кӏу екӏды нивӣцӏ.


There is an Arabic saying. Unfortunately, I do not know Arabic пӏәччӏ I don't know what it says.


Ниминсы тиджәсы пӏырӣъмнӣ тӏо дӯды:
1. шәкәр
2. милиътӏ
3. ӯн
4. ы̄ъй
5. 1/2 lb нэ̄тӏәритиъ
6. мӣккьӏ уъпӏтӏуъ
7. кьӏӯтӏ та̄виндэ дуътӏуъ
8. 375°быд рэ̄тыътӏуъ


Cute things to call your boyfriend:
Виликӏчӏа̄сәр виъсәс шорт сәтиъ имитӏиъкьи руън пӏәччӏ эв нук тӣтӏ кӏэнчӏ. Пӏиджчӏа̄сәр виъс вит расиӣъ кортӏӣъ нэкӏитӏиъкьи кӏәл. Ма̄шӣнэ̄ виъсэ̄ нәккӏ икӏвәсыънигъ виъсәсыънигъ синтӏцы бӣътӏиъкьи. Ник матӏацыкьчӏа̄сәртиъ виъс тәъла̄къми бәч къӏәъгьәми чӏәгьитӏиъкьи. Автобусс виъсәс уъртӏ ракъигъ сәнтӏитӏиъкьи гьу пӏайс виъс релсэсәд синтӏитӏиъкьи. Электросамакӏатӏс пырограмэ̄с нәджә̄гь гӯътӏиъкьи киттэ̄.
1. sugar
2. honey
3. flour
4. egg
5. 1/2 lb butter
6. stir
7. pour into pan
8. preheat to 375°


May every cyclist rip his shorts so that one ball hangs out. May every pedestrian be belamed by painful gout. May every car be totaled running over every horse. May every biker marriage end in bitterest divorce. May every bus flip over and may every train derail. May the app-based electronic scooter finally prevail.


Flamin' Hot Cheetos - Шуӏӯър «пӏа̄ккӏ лавӣъ тӏэ̄нӣъ тӣчӏ»-әш тәртӏ


Со̄с Тӏипӏ Great Value-итиъ - Газ милицёнерәмәс быъкӏтӏә та̄тӏә
Сигарэтӏэ̄с санджа̄бэ̄сы га̄йнтӏ.
Нийәме̄сы әгэ тӏви эвм гипӏсәриндэ тӏо ттӏилдыбыд гьу гьудж кӏэндыбыд.
МӢ СИГАР ИНЕӘМТӀУЪ


Майнэс тӏипӏ - Цӏва̄дэ̄ Гьиндос ю̄ъсәсы нурәндыргё̄м бәццарэ̄с тӏәшә̄м быъкӏтӏ та̄тӏ.
Cigarettes are like squirrels.
They are perfectly harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.
NO SMOKING


Бәццар Энт - упӏчӏа̄сәр бәццарэ̄тиъ гибридеисәс кӏу «Ик гьудж гугъкьӏппӏтӏэ мәс тӣды диркӏтӏ, хин тӏипӏэ̄ ми ниекӏыъды. Ми тӣ виъпӏ кӏэнытӏ.»


Пипирон - Дыкӏппӏэ кәм, киса тӏвитиъ ппир ттӏилды кӏанитӏиъ.
сәлә̄м, иккы пыриютӏчӏа̄сысы къарнәд вит екӏтӏ быдекӏчӏэш америкеәсәд. ик американо ӣъсәми сә гьӣкьӏинэ имтӏкьи кӏуэ


Ранч Hidden Valley-итиъ - Супӏчӏа̄сәр кӏу «нимытӏер эндорфинитиъ пӏырәппыъ»диркӏытӏ.
hello, i am refugee from american century of humiliation. where can i get an iced americano around these parts


Майнэс - Бәгьа̄рәми бәч виъды̄нәс бы̄ъмнис, милзәмэ̄сы гы̄рвэ̄сы пӏокӏтӏерәш бә̄ргәш.


Цӏах - Шуӏӯър гьудж пӏә̄въкӏ дыквигъ би гугъкьӏппӏтӏэ опӏтӏкьи.
Вин әлутэ выкӏтӏ я̄вэ̄д, пӏа̄ккӏ рэ̄пӏокӏтӏ та̄тӏ я̄вэ̄д!
Тӏви «виъсмисы бӯриъсы» ба̄тӏмай
(гьашерәми итӏэрэ̄) тӏви вә̄мтӏ кор?
Бәълс тӏо виттӏ ыъндэбыъга̄нәс нитәртӏ,
тӏӯъ би горгыс ыъндэбыъгэнтӏ:
Ръо̄н тӏвитиъ тӏэ̄тиъәд ппӏэтӏа̄тӏ.


Хасс Айсбергитиъ - Гьәъчс мигъэ̄ капсаицин пӏә̄въкӏ тәртӏ гьу пӏәччӏ мыдвэ̄сы эвпӏә̄въкӏ.
Always buying beer, always eating ready-made food!
Don't you say "everything is plenty,"
(even though in reality) you're incurring losses?
Your husband has no clothes to wear,
you yourself are wearing rags:
Your butt sticks out from them.


Ккӏырг - Эвэ̄, ккӏа бәццарэ̄сы бәч тӏипӏвисы бы̄ъмнис гӯънинтӏ. Тӏэ̄ кӏо̄ш бы̄ънәнцӏ кӏу тәъм гьәъчтиъ тытӏ.


Лупп Голл - Нәвъ «синг» бәццарэ̄с.
Кӏуэ дуъттӏо̄всы хин габис бингисәс :rofl::rofl::rofl: вин нойерэ уъпӏтӏуъ са̄дэ̄ вац
Сәсы мусәлсәлэ̄с әгэ̄с абдал. лыъктӏ=дуъш


Тӣкь - Капсаицин нитәртӏ.
Why was he so upset about a broken plate :rofl::rofl::rofl: just buy a new one bro
That's what the whole show is about dumbass. breaking=bad


Flamin' Hot Cheetos - Feels like "eating molten lava."


Great Value Hot Sauce - Spray used by police
Гунс Фылоридаеэ̄ вэрисәр уълӯчӏа̄ръӣ кӏвә̄н сэ̄тиъ упӏды нимытӏ ттӏилтӏ
Ни ик кӏо руктӏэ̄сы, мин ю̄ътӏ ик вэцӏ


Spicy Mayonnaise - The Indian army uses it as a base for their chili grenades.
Florida woman kidnaps scientist to make her dog immortal
I'm not saying she's right, but I get it


Black Pepper - "I felt it burning in the back of my throat, so hot that I couldn't speak. I began to shake," said the creator of the hybrid pepper.


Pepperoni - After a few bites, your sinuses will start to open up.
Гьар ми тӣды нэ̄чӏэ быътӏзәм?
Ик вәд ыъхатӏ уъджиттӏ гьу двә̄ вӣър пӏәшшӯруътиъ халлос, кӏарбонатӏ, валг лӣмытиъ ттӏилнинтӏ.
Ик вәд 20 минутигъ сытӏытӏ, гьу сәппӏэ, дыкӏтӏә сәм, пӏәччӏ ик вин епенерэ уъпӏытӏ.


Hidden Valley Ranch - Its creator claims he felt a "marvelous endorphin rush."
Wondering how I did it?
I boiled water and added two tablespoons of vinegar, baking soda, and lemon juice.
I soaked it for 20 minutes, and after that, it looked the same, so I bought a brand new one.


Mayonnaise - One of the best-known seasonings in the world, a key ingredient in white cooking.


Salt - May cause a slight burning sensation around the tongue or back of throat.
ТӀӮЪ КЬАКӀ КӀВӘ̄НТИЪ НИТӢТӀИЪССӘ,
КӀУЭ КЬАКӀ ГО̄КӀИТИЪ ТӢТӀМАЙ?
Луътфән, кӏо̄ш веганӣ бы̄ътӏуъ.


Iceberg Lettuce - The sizeable fruit is low in capsaicin and therefore relatively mild.
IF YOU WOULDN'T DRINK DOG'S MILK,
WHY DRINK COW'S MILK?
Please, try vegan.


Raisins - At one time, this was reputed to be the hottest pepper in the world. Those who have tried it say it has a fruity taste.


Green Beans - The "gentle" kind of peppers.
Ик вит ра̄йъә̄с виъсәм чӏигьнинтӏ сонрэ̄д кӏәръуб ниәдӣхкьиды... Ик хвәз гьудж чира̄гъӣъ бинзинис кӏэнды шшотӏәм чӏигьды ттӏәлтӏ
 
مبارح تلولا طفيت كل الضواوي عواد ما اصرف كهربا.. ودي اولع اللامضة وتريح من الفواتير


Cottage Cheese - Does not contain capsaicin.
The day before yesterday I cut all the lights so I wouldn't waste electricity... I want to light a gas lamp and be done with bills




Вӣъринэ виъсинэ твинксы тӏипӏуъсы сексиәсы гьу пӏыътӏыргсысы гьэ̄всы, ма̄кисс дэгьэ̄мисӣ бӣъды. Кӏуәс нәджә̄гь иттӏ о̄мэ̄?
1920э, Самуэль Решевский-әс вицӏәш 8 шәътрандж о̄ста̄дәми шәътранджә̄м биврәми тӣнтӏ сәкӏытӏ. Ләб хин виъс эхатӏ кор.


Inside every man is a hot sexy twink and a dom daddy, waging war for control. Who's winning today?
In 1920, 8 year old Samuel Reshevsky played chess with several chess masters at once. He lost every single game.


==Dialogs==
Guard 1: Сә тимсә̄л екӏатӏма нӯъ?
Statue: Вэ̄ тәъбәън, тимсә̄лм ниекӏэнтӏ!
Guard 2: Гьуъчч ццӏвис хин дӯтӏ.
Guard 1: Бәлэ, синттӏуъигъ.


Guard 1: Did that statue just talk?
gary бисквим тӏэ̄ игъдо̄нинтӏ
Statue: Of course not, statues don't talk!
Guard 2: It does raise a pretty good point.
Guard 1: Alright, carry on.


вӣцӏ тӏӯъ хин вирг тӣды пӏәччӏ тирды ыдж


ŋ't: Ик душ әдӣтӏ гьу пӏӯвәс ы̄ъс диркӏинтӏды "КЬАКӀ ЖЕНСКӘСЫ" лол
шукрән gary-э екӏтӏуъ
nico!: Бәлэ испанск виъдәнцӏухъ гьу кьакӏ женскәсы гӯътӏ
ŋ't: Мәӏс гьашэ̄
nico!: Испанск виъдәнцӏухъ или кьакӏ женскәсы ыъсәнцӏ?
ŋ't: Бәлэ
nico!: (gif)
ŋ't: Ми гьәърфӣ
nico!: Сә пӏоләсы тӏвитиъ гӯътӏ


ŋ't: I get out of the shower and the first thing I hear is "MILK IS FEMININE" lol
gary has brought you cookies
nico!: Yas I am learning Spanish and milk is feminine 😭
ŋ't: A true tragedy
nico!: learning Spanish or that milk is feminine
ŋ't: Yes
nico!: (gif)
ŋ't: Literally me
nico!: That is your gender


he knows you have been working hard so you deserve it


Чӏу уът уъм вӣдинтӏухъ са̄гьиърэ̄сы га̄йтӏды?
say thank you to gary
Э̄, вәт ми тыритон нэкӏытӏ!
Тыритон?
...Ик шифә̄ӏ тәрытӏ.


What makes you think she's a witch?
Well, she turned me into a newt!
A newt?
...I got better.


Ниминсы тиджәсы пӏырӣъмнӣ тӏо дӯды:
1. шәкәр
2. милиътӏ
3. ӯн
4. ы̄ъй
5. 1/2 lb нэ̄тӏәритиъ
6. мӣккьӏ уъпӏтӏуъ
7. кьӏӯтӏ та̄виндэ дуътӏуъ
8. 375°быд рэ̄тыътӏуъ


Ковбойәсы нигӯътӏыъ секси
Cute things to call your boyfriend:
Тӏви би кӏукӏтӏкьи емыр нӯъ
1. sugar
 
2. honey
Cowboys can't be sexy
3. flour
I bet you feel dumb right now
4. egg
5. 1/2 lb butter
6. stir
7. pour into pan
8. preheat to 375°




Ыг сә мейн-кун гӯътӏухъ вис! Кӏосы винисы иминэчӏәш?
Flamin' Hot Cheetos - Шуӏӯър «пӏа̄ккӏ лавӣъ тӏэ̄нӣъ тӣчӏ»-әш тәртӏ
474,320₽.
Ми нивӣцӏухъ дӯтӏыъды.


that maine coon looks good! what's the price to adopt it?
Со̄с Тӏипӏ Great Value-итиъ - Газ милицёнерәмәс быъкӏтӏә та̄тӏә
474,320₽.
 
I don't think I can afford that.
Майнэс тӏипӏ - Цӏва̄дэ̄ Гьиндос ю̄ъсәсы нурәндыргё̄м бәццарэ̄с тӏәшә̄м быъкӏтӏ та̄тӏ.


Бәццар Энт - упӏчӏа̄сәр бәццарэ̄тиъ гибридеисәс кӏу «Ик гьудж гугъкьӏппӏтӏэ мәс тӣды диркӏтӏ, хин тӏипӏэ̄ ми ниекӏыъды. Ми тӣ виъпӏ кӏэнытӏ.»


Огьан: Ми иттӏкьи емыр, мин ю̄ътӏ ми нииттӏ гьо̄шша̄р са̄дэ̄ссә.
Пипирон - Дыкӏппӏэ кәм, киса тӏвитиъ ппир ттӏилды кӏанитӏиъ.
Иван: Сә мәънинсы иттӏычӏәш емырәш гӯътӏ.
Огьан: Ми вӣцӏ. Сә огьурсы екӏчӏәш мәс.
Сӯкӏун: Ю̄ъс муджә̄дәл чӏәгьтӏыъ?
Огьан: Тӏӯъ якӏтӏыъ нэ̄чӏэ СӘСЫ муджә̄дәлэ̄сы га̄йтӏды?
Сӯкӏун: Ик тӏви нииба̄тӏ. Ик Гэл гьу Әруъш ибэ̄тӏ.
Огьан: О̄.


Ohan: I may be stupid, but at least I'm not smart.
Ранч Hidden Valley-итиъ - Супӏчӏа̄сәр кӏу «нимытӏер эндорфинитиъ пӏырәппыъ»диркӏытӏ.
Ivan: That's what being stupid means.
Ohan: I know. That's why I said it.
Sukun: Can you guys stop arguing?
Ohan: How can you call THAT an argument?
Sukun: I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to Gel and Arush.
Ohan: Ah.


Майнэс - Бәгьа̄рәми бәч виъды̄нәс бы̄ъмнис, милзәмэ̄сы гы̄рвэ̄сы пӏокӏтӏерәш бә̄ргәш.


Кӏафээ ''Heg Sheg''
Цӏах - Шуӏӯър гьудж пӏә̄въкӏ дыквигъ би гугъкьӏппӏтӏэ опӏтӏкьи.
Person 1: Сәлә̄м до̄ттӏ митиъ!
 
Person 2: Маргьәъбән бырэ̄тӏ митиъ, чӏу ик тӏви дӯтӏиъкьи?
Хасс Айсбергитиъ - Гьәъчс мигъэ̄ капсаицин пӏә̄въкӏ тәртӏ гьу пӏәччӏ мыдвэ̄сы эвпӏә̄въкӏ.
Person 1: Чай гьу нәгн луътфән.
 
Person 2: Тәъбәън, эв сә̄нӣ.
Ккӏырг - Эвэ̄, ккӏа бәццарэ̄сы бәч тӏипӏвисы бы̄ъмнис гӯънинтӏ. Тӏэ̄ кӏо̄ш бы̄ънәнцӏ кӏу тәъм гьәъчтиъ тытӏ.
Person 1: Шукрән бырэ̄тӏ.
 
Person 2: Чай чо̄ би голл?
Лупп Голл - Нәвъ «синг» бәццарэ̄с.
Person 1: Чо̄ луътфән.
Person 2: Кьакӏ би ни?
Person 1: Бәлэ.
Person 2: Шәкәр?
Person 1: Бәлэ.
Person 2: Сицӏуъ гэвшэкӏ. Ик тӏви екӏэтӏиъ шән кӏэнцы уъджиттӏ.
Person 1: Шукрән.


At the café ''Heg Sheg''
Тӣкь - Капсаицин нитәртӏ.
Person 1: Hello my friend!
Person 2: Welcome my brother, what can I get you?
Person 1: Tea and bread please.
Person 2: No problem, one moment.
Person 1: Thank you brother.
Person 2: Black tea or green?
Person 1: Black please.
Person 2: Milk or no?
Person 1: Yes.
Person 2: Sugar?
Person 1: Yes.
Person 2: You go relax. I'll tell you when the kettle boils.
Person 1: Thank you.


Flamin' Hot Cheetos - Feels like "eating molten lava."


[[File:Guimin tombstones.png|thumb]]
Great Value Hot Sauce - Spray used by police
9 Январэ, 2024


擺扽先生方士肉的 — Жакъ 5:33э
Spicy Mayonnaise - The Indian army uses it as a base for their chili grenades.
1800быд виъсмәс би пӏа̄ккӏ ттытӏзәм.
Гима̄хыргэс пӏӯв 1800әд кӏантӏ.


愚蠢的貓娘 — Жакъ 6:26э
Black Pepper - "I felt it burning in the back of my throat, so hot that I couldn't speak. I began to shake," said the creator of the hybrid pepper.
тәъбәън ынвис пӏа̄ккӏ гима̄хыргэс гьу ынуъмәс 1800эсинэ ӣропӏинтӏ итинэнтӏ


HM ʱSatan, Whittler of Omnicorp — Жакъ 7:53э
Pepperoni - After a few bites, your sinuses will start to open up.
гима̄хыргэс кәмбәмәс нига̄йнтӏыъ вис :(


wow — Жакъ 7:53э
Hidden Valley Ranch - Its creator claims he felt a "marvelous endorphin rush."
мәссәлэсы ыберәш


Mikey!!! :D — Жакъ 7:54э
Mayonnaise - One of the best-known seasonings in the world, a key ingredient in white cooking.
Тӏэ̄ сӣ якӏтӏә
 
Salt - May cause a slight burning sensation around the tongue or back of throat.


愚蠢的貓娘 — Жакъ 8:04э
Iceberg Lettuce - The sizeable fruit is low in capsaicin and therefore relatively mild.
ик пӏа̄ккӏ гима̄хыргәмәс кобалтәми та̄тӏ та̄тӏ о̄мэ̄ виъсэ̄


Mikey!!! :D — Жакъ 8:07э
Raisins - At one time, this was reputed to be the hottest pepper in the world. Those who have tried it say it has a fruity taste.
Ик дыкӏырг әлма̄сӣ кәмбәм упӏинтӏ олоркӏ хин бы̄ътӏ та̄тӏ


愚蠢的貓娘 — Жакъ 8:43э
Green Beans - The "gentle" kind of peppers.
ик дыкӏырг джӣвӣ джо̄ддэ мәс накӏтӏуъ
мммммм мэтӏалс гыро̄ә̄с ләзӣз хин


January 9, 2024
Cottage Cheese - Does not contain capsaicin.


擺扽先生方士肉的 — Today at 5:33 AM
Until 1800, everybody ate each other.
The first tomb stones date from 1800.


愚蠢的貓娘 — Today at 6:26 AM
Вӣъринэ виъсинэ твинксы тӏипӏуъсы сексиәсы гьу пӏыътӏыргсысы гьэ̄всы, ма̄кисс дэгьэ̄мисӣ бӣъды. Кӏуәс нәджә̄гь иттӏ о̄мэ̄?
clearly humans stopped eating humans and tomb stones in the 1800s


HM ʱSatan, Whittler of Omnicorp — Today at 7:53 AM
Inside every man is a hot sexy twink and a dom daddy, waging war for control. Who's winning today?
tomb stones can't be good for your teeth :(


wow — Today at 7:53 AM
skill issue


Mikey!!! :D — Today at 7:54 AM
Нимытӏерәс би хин ттӏилинтӏ джо̄ш я̄вэ̄д кьӏӯтӏ битӏонтиъ кӏэнчӏбыд
Speak for yourself
 
Виъсм бэ̄тӏ бэ̄тӏ кӏу «телепорт тӏэ̄мәс сӯълдэ синттӏуъ, тӏэ̄ чапдэ миксырис ӣхэнтӏуъ» бырэ̄тӏсәрыс сиъръитиъ митиъ, ми буджэтӏәш уъм вӣдухъды ым бәвгды нивӣцӏ
 
Immortals always so full of gas until the concrete starts pouring


愚蠢的貓娘 — Today at 8:04 AM
Everyone keeps saying "teleport them to the sun, throw them in the blender dimension" my brothers in magic I don't know what budget you think we are operating on
i eat tomb stones with cobalt every day


Mikey!!! :D — Today at 8:07 AM
I munch on diamond to make my teeth extra polished


愚蠢的貓娘 — Today at 8:43 AM
Ма̄йер упӏчӏ нэ̄чӏэ;
i munch on mercury get on my level
Пӏидәсы 1, ӯн сәъттыъндэ виргәш тӏо ттӏытӏуъ.
mmmmmm heavy metals so yummy
Пӏидәсы 2, кат ӯнәд имтӏуъ.
Пӏидәсы 3, ӯн катәд ытӏуъ.
Пӏидәсы 4, ӯн сәъттыъндэ виргәш тӏо двиъттӏытӏуъ. одәд синтӏссәды ю̄ътӏ пӏидәм 1-4 двиъттинтӏуъ.
Пӏидәсы 5, нәгн.


How to make sourdough;
Step 1, flour your work surface.
Step 2, remove cat from flour.
Step 3, remove flour from cat.
Step 4, reflour your work surface. If you have to leave the room repeat steps 1-4.
Step 5, bread.


«Тӏви тӏэ̄тӏ чӏӯ, о̄ ве̄тӏер лазутӏтиъ»
«Иккы Iowa-әсы тӏэ̄тӏ.»
«Сәсы лазутӏсы тӏэ̄тӏ! Сәсы лазутӏсы тӏэ̄тӏ! Сәсы лазутӏсы тӏэ̄тӏ!»


"How do you feel, o wise one of the corn?"
Тӏӯъ дыкӏ кьатӏәд бибы̄ътӏ. Къуър рэндэхъ бә̄йтӏуъ.
"I am one with Iowa."
"He is one with the corn! One with the corn! One with the corn!"


You've already bitten off the head. Grate a pear.


СУКЪРА̄Т: Эвмисы ми вӣдды вӣдчӏәсы нерәш мәс.
МИ: Э̄ вэ̄, мӣ сә екӏтӏуъ. Тӏви сәнчӏэ̄м вӣцӏ.
СУКЪРА̄Т: Ни, ми бэ̄тӏ-
МИ: Тӏӯъ хвәз ттӏәлитӏиъссә, ик вит тӏви сәнчӏэ̄мәс вӣдитӏиъ.
СУКЪРА̄Т:
МИ:
СУКЪРА̄Т:
СУКЪРА̄Т: *Бягъакӏ ттӏытӏ* Тӏәсы дыро̄всы.


SOCRATES: The only thing I know is that I know nothing.
«Ик хин гьәмәтӏ нерәс дӯр битрейт тирды бӣъухъчӏэ вә̄мтӏ»
ME: Aw, hey, don't say that. You know things.
SOCRATES: No, I meant-
ME: If you want I can teach you some stuff.
SOCRATES:
ME:
SOCRATES:
SOCRATES: *Points* That's a tree.


Икӏ бәле:


Ръӯй мигъ Америкигъ нэ̄в игъсинтӏыъды опӏитӏиъ такэ̄. Опӏтӏчӏәс виргәм биврә̄с too уъпӏитӏиъкьи сәм
"I sure hope nobody touches the wall that maintains the bitrate"


Вит ми сә тӣыъды нэ̄чӏэ мә̄ттӣэ̄ вӣцӏәкьима?
Scoundrel horse:


Бэ̄л
==Dialogs==
Guard 1: Сә тимсә̄л екӏатӏма нӯъ?
Statue: Вэ̄ тәъбәън, тимсә̄лм ниекӏэнтӏ!
Guard 2: Гьуъчч ццӏвис хин дӯтӏ.
Guard 1: Бәлэ, синттӏуъигъ.


They should build a big river across America so you can go across it by boat. Building it would create a lot of jobs too
Guard 1: Did that statue just talk?
Statue: Of course not, statues don't talk!
Guard 2: It does raise a pretty good point.
Guard 1: Alright, carry on.


Can someone explain to me how this would physically be possible?
Shovel


ŋ't: Ик душ әдӣтӏ гьу пӏӯвәс ы̄ъс диркӏинтӏды "КЬАКӀ ЖЕНСКӘСЫ" лол
nico!: Бәлэ испанск виъдәнцӏухъ гьу кьакӏ женскәсы гӯътӏ
ŋ't: Мәӏс гьашэ̄
nico!: Испанск виъдәнцӏухъ или кьакӏ женскәсы ыъсәнцӏ?
ŋ't: Бәлэ
nico!: (gif)
ŋ't: Ми гьәърфӣ
nico!: Сә пӏоләсы тӏвитиъ гӯътӏ


«Тӏӯъсы кӏуәсы гьу рэ̄быдсинтӏытӏмай нэ̄чӏэ?»
ŋ't: I get out of the shower and the first thing I hear is "MILK IS FEMININE" lol
nico!: Yas I am learning Spanish and milk is feminine 😭
ŋ't: A true tragedy
nico!: learning Spanish or that milk is feminine
ŋ't: Yes
nico!: (gif)
ŋ't: Literally me
nico!: That is your gender


«Иккы догъджиъсы, гьу ыккы догъджиъсы.»


"Who are you and how did you get here?"
Чӏу уът уъм вӣдинтӏухъ са̄гьиърэ̄сы га̄йтӏды?
Э̄, вәт ми тыритон нэкӏытӏ!
Тыритон?
...Ик шифә̄ӏ тәрытӏ.


"I'm a locksmith, and I'm a locksmith."
What makes you think she's a witch?
Well, she turned me into a newt!
A newt?
...I got better.




[[File:Guimin cat in da hospital.png|thumb]]
Ковбойәсы нигӯътӏыъ секси
Пӏырӣъмин джэррер вэ̄ма̄рэста̄нэ тӣтӏә сә о̄м гьу еркӏи мэ̄ иба̄тӏ кӏо гайджеэ̄сы гьу висвэ̄сы сә до̄тӏ еркӏи
Тӏви би кӏукӏтӏкьи емыр нӯъ
 
Cowboys can't be sexy
I bet you feel dumb right now
 
 
Ыг сә мейн-кун гӯътӏухъ вис! Кӏосы винисы иминэчӏәш?
474,320₽.
Ми нивӣцӏухъ дӯтӏыъды.
 
that maine coon looks good! what's the price to adopt it?
474,320₽.
I don't think I can afford that.
 
 
Огьан: Ми иттӏкьи емыр, мин ю̄ътӏ ми нииттӏ гьо̄шша̄р са̄дэ̄ссә.
Иван: Сә мәънинсы иттӏычӏәш емырәш гӯътӏ.
Огьан: Ми вӣцӏ. Сә огьурсы екӏчӏәш мәс.
Сӯкӏун: Ю̄ъс муджә̄дәл чӏәгьтӏыъ?
Огьан: Тӏӯъ якӏтӏыъ нэ̄чӏэ СӘСЫ муджә̄дәлэ̄сы га̄йтӏды?
Сӯкӏун: Ик тӏви нииба̄тӏ. Ик Гэл гьу Әруъш ибэ̄тӏ.
Огьан: О̄.
 
Ohan: I may be stupid, but at least I'm not smart.
Ivan: That's what being stupid means.
Ohan: I know. That's why I said it.
Sukun: Can you guys stop arguing?
Ohan: How can you call THAT an argument?
Sukun: I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to Gel and Arush.
Ohan: Ah.
 
 
Кӏафээ ''Heg Sheg''
Person 1: Сәлә̄м до̄ттӏ митиъ!
Person 2: Маргьәъбән бырэ̄тӏ митиъ, чӏу ик тӏви дӯтӏиъкьи?
Person 1: Чай гьу нәгн луътфән.
Person 2: Тәъбәън, эв сә̄нӣ.
Person 1: Шукрән бырэ̄тӏ.
Person 2: Чай чо̄ би голл?
Person 1: Чо̄ луътфән.
Person 2: Кьакӏ би ни?
Person 1: Бәлэ.
Person 2: Шәкәр?
Person 1: Бәлэ.
Person 2: Сицӏуъ гэвшэкӏ. Ик тӏви екӏэтӏиъ шән кӏэнцы уъджиттӏ.
Person 1: Шукрән.
 
At the café ''Heg Sheg''
Person 1: Hello my friend!
Person 2: Welcome my brother, what can I get you?
Person 1: Tea and bread please.
Person 2: No problem, one moment.
Person 1: Thank you brother.
Person 2: Black tea or green?
Person 1: Black please.
Person 2: Milk or no?
Person 1: Yes.
Person 2: Sugar?
Person 1: Yes.
Person 2: You go relax. I'll tell you when the kettle boils.
Person 1: Thank you.
 
 
[[File:Guimin tombstones.png|thumb]]
9 Январэ, 2024
 
擺扽先生方士肉的 — Жакъ 5:33э
1800быд виъсмәс би пӏа̄ккӏ ттытӏзәм.
Гима̄хыргэс пӏӯв 1800әд кӏантӏ.
 
愚蠢的貓娘 — Жакъ 6:26э
тәъбәън ынвис пӏа̄ккӏ гима̄хыргэс гьу ынуъмәс 1800эсинэ ӣропӏинтӏ итинэнтӏ
 
HM ʱSatan, Whittler of Omnicorp — Жакъ 7:53э
гима̄хыргэс кәмбәмәс нига̄йнтӏыъ вис :(
 
wow — Жакъ 7:53э
мәссәлэсы ыберәш
 
Mikey!!! :D — Жакъ 7:54э
Тӏэ̄ сӣ якӏтӏә
 
愚蠢的貓娘 — Жакъ 8:04э
ик пӏа̄ккӏ гима̄хыргәмәс кобалтәми та̄тӏ та̄тӏ о̄мэ̄ виъсэ̄
 
Mikey!!! :D — Жакъ 8:07э
Ик дыкӏырг әлма̄сӣ кәмбәм упӏинтӏ олоркӏ хин бы̄ътӏ та̄тӏ
 
愚蠢的貓娘 — Жакъ 8:43э
ик дыкӏырг джӣвӣ джо̄ддэ мәс накӏтӏуъ
мммммм мэтӏалс гыро̄ә̄с ләзӣз хин
 
January 9, 2024
 
擺扽先生方士肉的 — Today at 5:33 AM
Until 1800, everybody ate each other.
The first tomb stones date from 1800.
 
愚蠢的貓娘 — Today at 6:26 AM
clearly humans stopped eating humans and tomb stones in the 1800s
 
HM ʱSatan, Whittler of Omnicorp — Today at 7:53 AM
tomb stones can't be good for your teeth :(
 
wow — Today at 7:53 AM
skill issue
 
Mikey!!! :D — Today at 7:54 AM
Speak for yourself
 
愚蠢的貓娘 — Today at 8:04 AM
i eat tomb stones with cobalt every day
 
Mikey!!! :D — Today at 8:07 AM
I munch on diamond to make my teeth extra polished
 
愚蠢的貓娘 — Today at 8:43 AM
i munch on mercury get on my level
mmmmmm heavy metals so yummy
 
 
«Тӏви тӏэ̄тӏ чӏӯ, о̄ ве̄тӏер лазутӏтиъ»
«Иккы Iowa-әсы тӏэ̄тӏ.»
«Сәсы лазутӏсы тӏэ̄тӏ! Сәсы лазутӏсы тӏэ̄тӏ! Сәсы лазутӏсы тӏэ̄тӏ!»
 
"How do you feel, o wise one of the corn?"
"I am one with Iowa."
"He is one with the corn! One with the corn! One with the corn!"
 
 
СУКЪРА̄Т: Эвмисы ми вӣдды вӣдчӏәсы нерәш мәс.
МИ: Э̄ вэ̄, мӣ сә екӏтӏуъ. Тӏви сәнчӏэ̄м вӣцӏ.
СУКЪРА̄Т: Ни, ми бэ̄тӏ-
МИ: Тӏӯъ хвәз ттӏәлитӏиъссә, ик вит тӏви сәнчӏэ̄мәс вӣдитӏиъ.
СУКЪРА̄Т:
МИ:
СУКЪРА̄Т:
СУКЪРА̄Т: *Бягъакӏ ттӏытӏ* Тӏәсы дыро̄всы.
 
SOCRATES: The only thing I know is that I know nothing.
ME: Aw, hey, don't say that. You know things.
SOCRATES: No, I meant-
ME: If you want I can teach you some stuff.
SOCRATES:
ME:
SOCRATES:
SOCRATES: *Points* That's a tree.
 
 
Ръӯй мигъ Америкигъ нэ̄в игъсинтӏыъды опӏитӏиъ такэ̄. Опӏтӏчӏәс виргәм биврә̄с too уъпӏитӏиъкьи сәм
 
Вит ми сә тӣыъды нэ̄чӏэ мә̄ттӣэ̄ вӣцӏәкьима?
 
Бэ̄л
 
They should build a big river across America so you can go across it by boat. Building it would create a lot of jobs too
 
Can someone explain to me how this would physically be possible?
 
Shovel
 
 
«Тӏӯъсы кӏуәсы гьу рэ̄быдсинтӏытӏмай нэ̄чӏэ?»
 
«Иккы догъджиъсы, гьу ыккы догъджиъсы.»
 
"Who are you and how did you get here?"
 
"I'm a locksmith, and I'm a locksmith."
 
 
[[File:Guimin cat in da hospital.png|thumb]]
Пӏырӣъмин джэррер вэ̄ма̄рэста̄нэ тӣтӏә сә о̄м гьу еркӏи мэ̄ иба̄тӏ кӏо гайджеэ̄сы гьу висвэ̄сы сә до̄тӏ еркӏи


Тӏӯъсы висвэ̄сы???
Тӏӯъсы висвэ̄сы???


Кат вэ̄ма̄рэста̄нэ
Кат вэ̄ма̄рэста̄нэ
 
Катуъсы вэ̄ма̄рэста̄нэ Матвей
 
Бәлэ ми вӣцӏ тӏви мэ̄ иба̄тӏ пӏырәппыъвисы
 
Girlfriend had surgery at the hospital today and instead of her telling me that she's alive and okay she sends this instead
 
Are you okay???
 
Cat in da hospital
 
There's a cat in the hospital Matthew
 
Yes I know you've told me that's awesome
 
 
Иккы: гьәълкъэ̄с вәррә̄тиъ гьу ботыл митуътиъ пӏәшшӯрвӣ
 
Офицянтәсы: бә̄рг би рут?
 
Иккы, кӏо̄ш әдә̄нвӣ мәс ттӏилды ппӏавр бӣъды: вәрр угь пӏукӏсәр ттӏилды джо̄ш
 
Me: onion rings and a bottle of wine for the table
 
Waiter: white or red?
 
Me, trying to impress my date: which ever onion the chef prefers
 
 
'''Марр Ы̄ъйдыкӏ Гьәссә̄р''' (''Dasypeltis scabra''), гьӣсәртиъ Colubridae-итиъ, Ифрӣкъӣ Джәнӯб
 
''фотографи Cristian Schneider-ә̄ ''
 
Кӏу гипӏсәринэ гӯъръыргис зитӏмай??? Ләзӣзәсы???
 
Доттагъ тӏӯъ иък сә '''Марр Ы̄ъйдыкӏ Гьәссә̄р''' тӣчӏәш ыъкӏэтӏиъ ''ытэ̄л''
 
'''Common Egg-Eating Snake''' (''Dasypeltis scabra''), family Colubridae, South Africa
 
''photograph by Cristian Schneider''
 
What's in the little critter's mouth??? Is it tasty???
 
Bestie you will ''never'' guess what this '''Common Egg-Eating Snake''' is doing
 
 
кӏуэ миръә̄ъдсы?
 
Двә̄ туърппӏэ. Мы̄ъсә̄м сорчирәш тә̄тӏуъ лук са̄дэ̄.
 
Кӏуәш.
 
Where is the bathroom at?
 
Two doors down. Just be careful of the toilet rats.
 
The what.
 
 
Дуъгьо̄бвисы кӏуъмирә̄с-квартӏэ̄с кәчеәм лушшуъпӏэ игъсинтӏды диркӏрә
 
Ик угьм давъэхъ тӏәш дӯтӏкьи
 
КӀУЪМИРСА̄ГЬИЪРЭ̄СЫ
 
КӀУЪМИРСА̄ГЬИЪРЭ̄СЫ
 
Mystery as female hammerhead sharks found gathering under full moon
 
I would give anything to be invited to this
 
SHARKWITCHES
 
SHARKWITCHES
 
 
Нерәсы е висәсы биккӏла бәстӣ къӏоппӏыд
 
Биккӏла бәст гьу билетӏ сорчирбыд эвла пӏырого̄мытиъ э̄
 
Ынуъсы дуърро Taco Bell-ә̄ тӣтӏ мыдуъсы, та̄рӣхс диц ттитӏиъ
 
Nothing like a six pack after work
 
A six pack and one way ticket to the toilet eh
 
People who get diarrhea from Taco Bell are weak and history will forget them
 
==Longer translations==
Ик гьуъпп стэйкэ мәс ттӏытӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ ми вӣцӏухъ вӣ виъсэ̄ чӏиъгьинтӏуъ кӏо̄ш бы̄ънтӏ уът гӯъ биъцц.
Ик бәгьа̄р би тәъмтәъм стэйкэ ниттӏилтӏ гьәссә̄рэ̄, мин ю̄ътӏ кӏуъ кӏадг дуътӏ?
Э̄ррэ̄ чӏӯниъ сә кӏатӏ, гьуъж ыкӏуътиъ тытӏ.
Стэйк печӣъ динис гьәссә̄рӣъ упӏычӏ иттӏ пӏә̄въ, гьу иттӏ тэ̄нтӏ сәвс.
Сытӏинтӏуъинәд гьу диц ттытӏиъ.
Эв гьу вен такърӣбән сә̄ъппӏэ, иттӏинэды дә̄рӣтӏэ̄ хин пӏәччӏ гӯътӏ сәвс гьу вәгы нӯъ.
Сә пӏа̄ккӏ ынуъмәс быъкӏтӏәыъ.
Чам е̄мыргӣ тӏәш әмтӏуъухъ.
Сә тәъм ккӏэ̄тӏнитиъ тытӏ.
Ни ккӏэ̄тӏнәсы мәджә̄зӣәсы, ккӏэ̄тӏнәсы мәнуъшәсы гьәърфӣәсы гьашәсы.
 
I love my steak, but I think we all just need to stop trying to make it taste good.
I usually don't season or flavor my steak, but who cares?
Because when this stuff gets going, it smells like dead bodies.
Cooking a steak with a normal home oven is disgusting, and it tends to be dry.
Let's go outside and forget about it.
After about an hour and a half, it's been in there for so long it is now dry and hard.
This is unfit for human consumption.
Let's just taste a little sliver of this.
That tastes like vomit.
Not figurative vomit, but actual literal human sick.
 
Ик мыг митиъ тэтӏиъинэ, гьу ӣсиъм кӏэнинтӏссә нэкӏинтӏабиъссә сә ыъкӏтӏ ым ттинтӏыъ.
Нуъ дыкӏинтӏуъ зэ̄т тӏәдуъсыгъ хин ттӏилтӏ.
Гьвә̄пӏ, гьвә̄пӏ.
Ытӏуъәд -
 
I'm gonna add my chicken, and if the bubbles start to form around it that means we're good to go.
Now realize that you put in way to much fucking oil.
Okay, okay.
Remove -
 
 
Чӏигьтӏуъ! Ынуъс Кьӏа̄тӏигъ Мытӏӣс сытӏәнцӏкьиды жаваб сә тӏырӣ суӏә̄линытиъ мэ̄ дӯтӏуъ, диркӏитӏиъчӏрэ̄ ракъис итӏэрисәс.
Суӏә̄линыс мэ̄ екӏэнтӏуъ, сакъӏ кьӏа̄тӏитиъ. Ми нииттӏ тӏыттӏ.
Чӏусы ниминсы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Ниминсы мәс Sir Lancelot of Camelot-әсы.
Чӏусы пуе̄сы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Вит Граал Чӏвәнтӏ диркӏтӏә.
Чӏусы рәнгэ̄сы кирмиънэ̄сы тӏо га̄йтӏ?
Кьә̄вкӏ.
Руктӏ. Синттӏуъдэ.
О̄, шукрән. Шукрән хин.
Гӯътӏ са̄д!
Чӏигьтӏуъ! Ынуъс Кьӏа̄тӏигъ Мытӏӣс сытӏәнцӏкьиды жаваб сә тӏырӣ суӏә̄линытиъ мэ̄ дӯтӏуъ, диркӏитӏиъчӏрэ̄ ракъис итӏэрисәс.
Суӏә̄линыс мэ̄ екӏэнтӏуъ, сакъӏ кьӏа̄тӏитиъ. Ми нииттӏ тӏыттӏ.
Чӏусы ниминсы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Sir Robin of Camelot-әсы.
Чӏусы пуе̄сы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Вит Граал Чӏвәнтӏ диркӏтӏә.
Чӏусы па̄йтәхтэ̄сы Әшшӯрә̄ёс га̄йтӏ?
Ми сә нивӣцӏ! А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄!
 
Stop! Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
Ask me the questions, bridge-keeper. I'm not afraid.
What is your name?
My name is Sir Lancelot of Camelot.
What is your quest?
To seek the Holy Grail.
What is your favorite color?
Blue.
Right. Off you go.
Oh, thank you. Thank you very much.
That's easy!
Stop! Who approaches the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
Ask me the questions, bridge-keeper. I'm not afraid.
What is your name?
Sir Robin of Camelot.
What is your quest?
To seek the Holy Grail.
What is the capital of Assyria?
I don't know that! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
 
===Ni̦xlo creation myth===
Бы̄ъмәсы гӯънтӏ пӏә̄вл, мугьӣът бурн имтӏә, чӏӯниъ сиъръ дӯтӏәды. Болъукӏәд вӣыънэ синтӏытӏуъпӏтӏэ, вӣрэ̄ 3 билёнэ̄, бы̄ъкьӏ пӏирвытиъ тынтӏды; эттэ̄лэ̄тиъ я̄вэ̄деәтиъ суълтӏос ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan-әш. Ӣхатӏ биъцӏ е̄н сытӏытӏ 3 иррэ̄ вид синтӏытӏдэцы. Билтӏ тӏәш нэкӏнинтӏ, вид ппӏыдиттӏды пылитӏэ̄с тектоническэ̄с, гьу буът упӏды. Әгәрчи буътнәс гайдж до̄нтӏ, тәттӣдэ̄сы тӏэ̄нтӏ. Ничӏигьытӏ нэкӏытӏ. 'Kꝛefrao, вэләм, сә диркӏнинтӏ, гьу вӣднинтӏухъ тӏэ̄инигъды. Ватӏәд, 'Ƕakꜥité, синтӏнинтӏ гьу ппӏәрэ̄с мугьӣътисиндэ ноесиндэ тынинтӏ, сиъръ тәъбӣъ бәвкӏтӏды сәми тӏэ̄ды. Мәнвис биврәм сә гьӣкьӏэсдэ ттӏилнинтӏ ттым, ӏәсәлә̄ф митиъ, гьу вит пӏә̄въкӏмә̄с эвеэс, ым jonskyo, варждэ сиъръ гьӣкьӏитиъ бо̄кӏтӏды, бы̄виныс кӏырәвтиъ ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan-әш, вит ппӏәр чӏигьды нэкӏды ттӏилнинтӏ. 'Kꝛefrao вӣыънэ тӏэ̄нинтӏ ттым, вит ым тӏокӏигъ машырис, гьу цә̄е̄с, сытӏнинтӏды. Әгәрчи тәълӣм сәтиъ тӏәйнтӏ, муджыр кӏо̄ш иъкъа̄б бы̄ънтӏды тӏэ̄рәыъндэ. Тӏәс, нӣъсәр 1578әш, вит ым сиъръ ни агъэ̄ми, гьу йәмиъм виъсэ̄с акӏытӏды сәппӏәдэ̄, дыкӏнинтӏ.
 
The world was barren, consumed by a violent ocean, when magick was given. It fell from the void above us, 3 billion years behind us, in the form of a boulder; a piece of the endless body of ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan. As it neared the water, it split and journeyed to 3 points. Its bodies grew, replacing the water to make the tectonic plates, and the land. Although the land brought life, it posed a threat. It did not stop growing. The 'Kꝛefrao, the wolves, saw this, and decided to intervene. They came from their realm, 'Ƕakꜥité, and carried the seeds into the new oceans, utilising the inherent magick to join them. They then placed many peoples onto these lands, our ancestors, and trained a select few, we the jonskyo, to use the land's magick, the streams of the blood of ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan, to prevent growth of these seeds. The 'Kꝛefrao then ruled over us, guiding us down a path of peace, and protection. Although their teachings live, they were overthrown, by a criminal they had tried to punish. He, the leader of 1578, introduced us to uninhibited magick, and all the harm that followed.
 
===Long-term nuclear waste warning message===
Сә джа̄гсы сычӏәсы, гьу эттэ̄лэ̄сы ниъзэ̄с сычӏә̄м. Дыкӏтӏуъ!
 
Вит сэ сычӏ синтӏчӏәсы гӯънтӏ гы̄руъсы нә̄ъм. Ы̄в сив тәссӣбәсы тӏы̄ътӏәсы диркӏнинтӏ.


Катуъсы вэ̄ма̄рэста̄нэ Матвей
Сә джа̄гсы ни джа̄гсы мигъисы. Тӣчӏ хин мигъ мытӏәд ниимтӏә сәэ̄. Хханер сәэ нитӏэ̄тӏ.


Бәлэ ми вӣцӏ тӏви мэ̄ иба̄тӏ пӏырәппыъвисы
Кӏуәсы тӏәсыэ гӯънтӏ къэрым гьу пӏә̄въ нә̄ъм. Сә сычӏәсы бӯчерәсы къэрымис.


Girlfriend had surgery at the hospital today and instead of her telling me that she's alive and okay she sends this instead
Къэрым джа̄гэ эвӣънэ тӏыътӏ. Мичиндэ акӏтӏ, мич къэрымтиъ сәэ, мигъмисәс гьу бы̄ъкьӏәш эвӣънә̄м, гьу вӣуъпӏэ, тӏэ̄тӏ.


Are you okay???
Къэрым тӏыътӏ нӯъ, зәмэ̄ уъсәм, тӏәсыэ̄ нә̄ъс.


Cat in da hospital
Къэрымсы суълтӏвӣ, вит акӏтӏыъ мир.


There's a cat in the hospital Matthew
Бы̄ъкьӏәсы къэрымис кьӏӯтӏәсы жигырмисәс.


Yes I know you've told me that's awesome
Къэрым мәън сә джа̄гӣ хин нэкӏссәды ыъхтӏә мо̄ч эвэ̄ мә̄ттӣэ̄. Сә джа̄г тыътӏуъ ккӏы гьу ни гьиътӏ такэ̄.


==Longer translations==
This place is a message, and part of a system of messages. Pay attention to it!
Ик гьуъпп стэйкэ мәс ттӏытӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ ми вӣцӏухъ вӣ виъсэ̄ чӏиъгьинтӏуъ кӏо̄ш бы̄ънтӏ уът гӯъ биъцц.
Ик бәгьа̄р би тәъмтәъм стэйкэ ниттӏилтӏ гьәссә̄рэ̄, мин ю̄ътӏ кӏуъ кӏадг дуътӏ?
Э̄ррэ̄ чӏӯниъ сә кӏатӏ, гьуъж ыкӏуътиъ тытӏ.
Стэйк печӣъ динис гьәссә̄рӣъ упӏычӏ иттӏ пӏә̄въ, гьу иттӏ тэ̄нтӏ сәвс.
Сытӏинтӏуъинәд гьу диц ттытӏиъ.
Эв гьу вен такърӣбән сә̄ъппӏэ, иттӏинэды дә̄рӣтӏэ̄ хин пӏәччӏ гӯътӏ сәвс гьу вәгы нӯъ.
Сә пӏа̄ккӏ ынуъмәс быъкӏтӏәыъ.
Чам е̄мыргӣ тӏәш әмтӏуъухъ.
Сә тәъм ккӏэ̄тӏнитиъ тытӏ.
Ни ккӏэ̄тӏнәсы мәджә̄зӣәсы, ккӏэ̄тӏнәсы мәнуъшәсы гьәърфӣәсы гьашәсы.


I love my steak, but I think we all just need to stop trying to make it taste good.
Sending this message was important to us. We considered ourselves to be a powerful culture.
I usually don't season or flavor my steak, but who cares?
Because when this stuff gets going, it smells like dead bodies.
Cooking a steak with a normal home oven is disgusting, and it tends to be dry.
Let's go outside and forget about it.
After about an hour and a half, it's been in there for so long it is now dry and hard.
This is unfit for human consumption.
Let's just taste a little sliver of this.
That tastes like vomit.
Not figurative vomit, but actual literal human sick.


Ик мыг митиъ тэтӏиъинэ, гьу ӣсиъм кӏэнинтӏссә нэкӏинтӏабиъссә сә ыъкӏтӏ ым ттинтӏыъ.
This place is not a place of honor. No highly esteemed deed is commemorated here. Nothing valued is here.
Нуъ дыкӏинтӏуъ зэ̄т тӏәдуъсыгъ хин ттӏилтӏ.
Гьвә̄пӏ, гьвә̄пӏ.
Ытӏуъәд -


I'm gonna add my chicken, and if the bubbles start to form around it that means we're good to go.
What is here was dangerous and repulsive to us. This message is a warning about danger.
Now realize that you put in way to much fucking oil.
Okay, okay.
Remove -


The danger is in a particular location. It increases towards a center, the center of danger is here, of a particular size and shape, and below us.


Чӏигьтӏуъ! Ынуъс Кьӏа̄тӏигъ Мытӏӣс сытӏәнцӏкьиды жаваб сә тӏырӣ суӏә̄линытиъ мэ̄ дӯтӏуъ, диркӏитӏиъчӏрэ̄ ракъис итӏэрисәс.
The danger is still present, in your time, as it was in ours.
Суӏә̄линыс мэ̄ екӏэнтӏуъ, сакъӏ кьӏа̄тӏитиъ. Ми нииттӏ тӏыттӏ.
Чӏусы ниминсы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Ниминсы мәс Sir Lancelot of Camelot-әсы.
Чӏусы пуе̄сы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Вит Граал Чӏвәнтӏ диркӏтӏә.
Чӏусы рәнгэ̄сы кирмиънэ̄сы тӏо га̄йтӏ?
Кьә̄вкӏ.
Руктӏ. Синттӏуъдэ.
О̄, шукрән. Шукрән хин.
Гӯътӏ са̄д!
Чӏигьтӏуъ! Ынуъс Кьӏа̄тӏигъ Мытӏӣс сытӏәнцӏкьиды жаваб сә тӏырӣ суӏә̄линытиъ мэ̄ дӯтӏуъ, диркӏитӏиъчӏрэ̄ ракъис итӏэрисәс.
Суӏә̄линыс мэ̄ екӏэнтӏуъ, сакъӏ кьӏа̄тӏитиъ. Ми нииттӏ тӏыттӏ.
Чӏусы ниминсы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Sir Robin of Camelot-әсы.
Чӏусы пуе̄сы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Вит Граал Чӏвәнтӏ диркӏтӏә.
Чӏусы па̄йтәхтэ̄сы Әшшӯрә̄ёс га̄йтӏ?
Ми сә нивӣцӏ! А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄!


Stop! Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
The danger is to the body, and it can kill.
Ask me the questions, bridge-keeper. I'm not afraid.
What is your name?
My name is Sir Lancelot of Camelot.
What is your quest?
To seek the Holy Grail.
What is your favorite color?
Blue.
Right. Off you go.
Oh, thank you. Thank you very much.
That's easy!
Stop! Who approaches the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
Ask me the questions, bridge-keeper. I'm not afraid.
What is your name?
Sir Robin of Camelot.
What is your quest?
To seek the Holy Grail.
What is the capital of Assyria?
I don't know that! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!


===Ni̦xlo creation myth===
The form of the danger is an emanation of energy.
Бы̄ъмәсы гӯънтӏ пӏә̄вл, мугьӣът бурн имтӏә, чӏӯниъ сиъръ дӯтӏәды. Болъукӏәд вӣыънэ синтӏытӏуъпӏтӏэ, вӣрэ̄ 3 билёнэ̄, бы̄ъкьӏ пӏирвытиъ тынтӏды; эттэ̄лэ̄тиъ я̄вэ̄деәтиъ суълтӏос ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan-әш. Ӣхатӏ биъцӏ е̄н сытӏытӏ 3 иррэ̄ вид синтӏытӏдэцы. Билтӏ тӏәш нэкӏнинтӏ, вид ппӏыдиттӏды пылитӏэ̄с тектоническэ̄с, гьу буът упӏды. Әгәрчи буътнәс гайдж до̄нтӏ, тәттӣдэ̄сы тӏэ̄нтӏ. Ничӏигьытӏ нэкӏытӏ. 'Kꝛefrao, вэләм, сә диркӏнинтӏ, гьу вӣднинтӏухъ тӏэ̄инигъды. Ватӏәд, 'Ƕakꜥité, синтӏнинтӏ гьу ппӏәрэ̄с мугьӣътисиндэ ноесиндэ тынинтӏ, сиъръ тәъбӣъ бәвкӏтӏды сәми тӏэ̄ды. Мәнвис биврәм сә гьӣкьӏэсдэ ттӏилнинтӏ ттым, ӏәсәлә̄ф митиъ, гьу вит пӏә̄въкӏмә̄с эвеэс, ым jonskyo, варждэ сиъръ гьӣкьӏитиъ бо̄кӏтӏды, бы̄виныс кӏырәвтиъ ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan-әш, вит ппӏәр чӏигьды нэкӏды ттӏилнинтӏ. 'Kꝛefrao вӣыънэ тӏэ̄нинтӏ ттым, вит ым тӏокӏигъ машырис, гьу цә̄е̄с, сытӏнинтӏды. Әгәрчи тәълӣм сәтиъ тӏәйнтӏ, муджыр кӏо̄ш иъкъа̄б бы̄ънтӏды тӏэ̄рәыъндэ. Тӏәс, нӣъсәр 1578әш, вит ым сиъръ ни агъэ̄ми, гьу йәмиъм виъсэ̄с акӏытӏды сәппӏәдэ̄, дыкӏнинтӏ.


The world was barren, consumed by a violent ocean, when magick was given. It fell from the void above us, 3 billion years behind us, in the form of a boulder; a piece of the endless body of ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan. As it neared the water, it split and journeyed to 3 points. Its bodies grew, replacing the water to make the tectonic plates, and the land. Although the land brought life, it posed a threat. It did not stop growing. The 'Kꝛefrao, the wolves, saw this, and decided to intervene. They came from their realm, 'Ƕakꜥité, and carried the seeds into the new oceans, utilising the inherent magick to join them. They then placed many peoples onto these lands, our ancestors, and trained a select few, we the jonskyo, to use the land's magick, the streams of the blood of ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan, to prevent growth of these seeds. The 'Kꝛefrao then ruled over us, guiding us down a path of peace, and protection. Although their teachings live, they were overthrown, by a criminal they had tried to punish. He, the leader of 1578, introduced us to uninhibited magick, and all the harm that followed.
The danger is unleashed only if you substantially disturb this place physically. This place is best shunned and left uninhabited.


===Translations of Yambot text===
===Translations of Yambot text===