Guimin/Corpus: Difference between revisions

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(Иккы екӏтӏ мәффвӣ тӏо уъртӏмнис бәрэ̄с ба̄тӏбыд гьу сәэ̄ тадӣъкъ тӏотӏӣъ сәм ттӏилтӏ 5000 йә̄рэ̄) Jeff луппвис уъртӏмымәс мытӏ ю̄ътӏды вӣцӏухъ lmao
(Иккы екӏтӏ мәффвӣ тӏо уъртӏмнис бәрэ̄с быдба̄тӏ гьу сәэ̄ тадӣъкъ тӏотӏӣъ сәм ттӏилтӏ 5000 йә̄рэ̄) Jeff луппвис уъртӏмымәс мытӏ ю̄ътӏды вӣцӏухъ lmao


(Me making fun of your crop rotation idea and thereby holding our people back another 5000 years) Jeff thinks thinks the beans have to take turns lmao
(Me making fun of your crop rotation idea and thereby holding our people back another 5000 years) Jeff thinks thinks the beans have to take turns lmao
Line 679: Line 679:
When the counter's liver is not processing bilirubin 😳
When the counter's liver is not processing bilirubin 😳


==Multiple sentences==
Ыг екӏчӏа̄сәрыс пӏалуягэ̄мтиъ нибэ̄нтӏ руктӏэ̄. Гӯ тӏыътӏ тӏэ̄ образован сытандартизирован вис нииъмтӏухъыъды эрчӏэ̄ э̄ррэ̄ са̄дэ̄. Кӏу 51%эс нуфӯсис Каспялъукъэ вә̄нд дыквӣъ сӯърӣъ дәркӏтӏыъ са̄дэ̄, мацорд нуфӯсис ба̄тӏ ныроджэ̄ о̄мэ̄ гьу никӏадгэ̄. Са̄зимысы нә̄ъ сә ыъхтӏ атӏэл.


Speakers of Russo-Guimin do not speak correctly. It is only because they don't have sufficient access to good standardized schooling. In Kaspiysk only 51 percent of the population is literate in the standard language, the rest of the population speaks incorrectly on a daily and casual basis. As an organization we abhor this.
Дәстӯринэ хин ниыъкӏтӏ кӏо C-4әм хин ттымыъндэ ниллинтӏыъ мәъккәмэ̄с уъцӏирэ̄с ыъкӏтӏмай


It doesn't say anywhere in the constitution you can't place c4s all over the supreme court building now does it


Әттӏма бырӯъ? Чӏӯниъ ик гьар тӏәмӣ ыъкӏтӏды, Ми вӣцӏухъ са̄дэ̄ тәба̄р сэ̄тиъ ыъттӏ миъгы шумә; гӯ кӏунәм биврәм пыриютӏәд гьӣкьӏинэ кӏырәв миъгы бытӏ.


Is she pure? When I ask that I'm only wondering whether or not her ancestry is mixed, many dogs from shelter in the area have mixed blood.
Иккы о̄мппӏэ ды̄ърппӏэ фабрикӏэхъ о̄мнис ды̄ърисәс


Me after a long day at the long day factory


Ыг сэ̄сы питбуләсы пәррикъ виъкӏәд Румыниэ ниминми Sighet-әми әмтӏә. Кӏо таркӣбәс тӏәшэ̄с родословнае̄с 70%әм такърӣбән питбулитиъ тыринтӏ. Ыг сә дыкӏтӏәыъ сиъфэ̄синэ бивринэ мә̄ттӣинэ гьу биохимическинэ тӏәшэ̄с. Кӏо эттэ̄лэ̄сы гӯънтӏды эве кӏимликӏәд иъркъис тӏәшэ̄с.


She's a rescued pit-bull from a town in Romania called Sighet. Her genealogical composition comprises of around 70% pitbull. This can be noticed in many of her physical and biochemical traits. Facets unique to her species' identity.
Jay Leno диркӏтӏә сәсы эвмәс рәсым кӏарикӏатӏурӣъ Bill Clinton-әш бә̄йнтӏә̄й гьу рәсса̄мс адуъкӏәс рәсым нәвъӣ уккӏгьашэ тӏәшэ̄с кӏарикӏатӏурэ̄с бә̄йнтӏә̄й Bill Clinton-әсы нивӣдды


Jay Leno looks like if someone drew a caricature of Bill Clinton and a different artist drew a realistic version of that caricature without knowing it was Bill Clinton


Сә ккӏа дәъгътсы ширйә̄нинс тӏо 141сы/91сы, е бирк хин уъртӏмысы сәрэ̄. Ик рицэпӏтӏ диуретикәмтиъ кәм тӏэ̄ дӯтӏиъ сә кумагбыдэ̄, мин ю̄ътӏ тӏӯъ рацён тӏвитиъ нэкӏычӏ тӏиркӏтӏ иттӏ ю̄ътӏ шифә̄ӏ угь диркӏычӏрэ̄.


It says here your blood pressure is 141/91, even higher than last time. I'll give you a prescription for some diuretics to help with that, but to see any improvement you really do need to change your diet.
Ик вә̄нд сә кьатӏӣ китә̄бинэ идишеинэ бырэджинэ мәс мармиладырг кӏэнчӏрэ̄ быддәркӏитӏиъыъма, ым диркӏәнтӏиъкьи


Can I finish reading this chapter in my little Yiddish book before the gummy kicks in, let's find out


Кӏуэ уъртӏмэ виъсэ ик вит тӏви сә компютэр бәвкӏтӏыъды, М кьавиш акӏтӏ иначӏ виъсэ̄? Тӏви вӣцӏухъ кьавишэ̄с итӏэрэ̄с кәм хин ыъсинтӏкьиды пычац мин ю̄ътӏ вэ̄, сә са̄дэ̄. Чинаграмэ̄сы микравалнофкэ̄с дыкӏтӏә нӯъ уъртӏмэ виъсэ ик кӏо̄ш бы̄ътӏды бәвг.


Why is it that every time I let you use this computer the M key always gets stuck? You'd think at least some other keys would be messed up but no, just that one. Now every time I try to type it looks like a transcript of a microwave.
Чизбургир мэ̄ дуътӏуъ, ни торш, ни со̄с.


Can I have a cheeseburger, no pickles, no sauce?


Басәйн 10:00инигъ 20:00инигъ гӯътӏ ппё. Сәм, нӣш «НЕ КУРИТЬ»итиъ дыкӏтӏуъ;
тӏуъ сә сигарэтӏ тэтӏиъбыдкьи гӯъинәдды хвәз ттӏилитӏиъдыссә.


The pool is open from 10:00 to 20:00. Also, mind the No Smoking sign; you can finish that cigarette outside if you'd like.
Сәмкӏӯъ митиъ мэ̄ итӏэрбыримчӏа̄сәречӏа̄ръис тӏәдиркӏчӏәш екӏатӏ нӯъ, Southwest Boeing 737-әсы гьәссә̄рәсы а̄сма̄нэ са̄дэ̄ мин ю̄ътӏ кӏу дӯрбӣнэхъ кӏабининэ итӏэрбыримчӏа̄сәречӏа̄сысы бәвгды укӏукӏтӏыъ


My neighbor just told me about an alien sighting he had that was just a regular Southwest Boeing 737 in the sky but he said he could see into the cockpit with binoculars and there was an alien flying it


Бибәшшэ̄д хин, сәшшид Глебов, Нә̄ъ сә пӏалтӏ тӏвитиъ ттитӏиъыъ ла̄втӏ тӏукӏэ̄. Луътфән сыпа митиъ бәвкӏтӏуъ сәбыдэ̄, хъывэ̄ возмещениэ̄сы ниудопстәш.


I'm so sorry Mr. Glebov, we can get that coat of yours cleaned up shortly. In the meantime, please help yourself to our spa free of charge as compensation for the inconvenience.
Мэ̄тӏсәр вит чӏигьчӏа̄сәр нинэкӏытӏ, нибагечӏа̄сәр лъэг сә кәма̄йм имухъчӏдэ бӣъды тӣды нэкӏытӏ


Mama didn't raise a quitter, she raised a burnt out perfectionist who is sometimes bludgeoned into settling for mediocrity


Бэ̄ръ руктӏ, ыг сә дә̄рӣтӏуъсы дуъсыгъәсы. Кӏу гъуллакъинсы тӏәш?


I'm gonna be honest, that was too long. What's the gist of it?
Луътфән ниъзбыд фәшилбыд минтӏуъ ниво̄ккӏэ̄.


Please wait patiently for the failure of the system.


Кӏу тәълӣм тӏвитиъ дӯнтӏычӏ диншэ̄ хин иттиълә̄ъис, әгәрчи тэ̄нтӏ пӏырәппыъ пәррикъ э̄нмнӣ гьу ка̄гъәмәс имчӏинэ, вит е хин ниимтӏәухъ. Ми якӏэтӏиъкьи тӏӯъ нипӏитт двиъбӣънтӏды вӣдрәгьэыъэ̄ е әттыэ̄.


Giving your teachings in a such a information-dense way, while great for saving breath and paper, makes them much less accessible. I'd suggest you re-write them in a way that's more easily parseable.
Сӯъй митиъ кӏу әкӏтӏә̄пӏидис ккӏоп я̄рукъисинигъ бырэджинигъ синтӏыъды ивӣцӏ, пӏәччӏ бэ̄ вәд мугьӣътигъ синтӏды бытӏ әкӏтӏә̄пӏидс ккӏоп тӏәръо̄ниндэ синтӏкьичӏэ, ик бэ̄ вәд мугьӣътигъ синтӏды бытӏ нӯъ сәм.


My son told me he learned that octopuses can climb through small cracks, so he's scared to swim in the ocean because an octopus might climb inside his butt, and now I'm scared to swim in the ocean too.


Ик гьәълтӏ эвэ сә буравае̄м Palestine-әмиэ та̄тӏ та̄тӏ. Чӏӯниъ сә ы̄в гӯънтӏэды нӯъ э̄нкӏтӏ тӏуъччӏ, вит ы̄в двитӏӣъмдэ синтӏинтӏ. Гъё̄мәсы хин.


I work on one of them oil rigs by Palestine (Texas). Once the one we're at now comes up empty they'll send us over to the next one. Hell of a way to make a living.
Вэ̄, ниминсы дискачэкӏэ̄с е гы̄руъсы, мэ̄ екӏтӏуъ нӯъ


No, the disco names are more important, tell me now


Тӏви барбекюә̄ гӯътӏссә мац, динэ мэ̄тӏбырэ̄тӏръис мәс John синттӏуъ. Тӏәс нугь такърӣбән тӏӯъ хвәз ттӏәлтӏкьиды уъпӏтӏыъ пӏырәппыъэ̄ хин тӏӯъ мӣм гьу зәм эрчӏ тӏәмӣ ттутӏиъссә. Әгәрчи гьар нугьдэ хин выгинтӏды тынэнтӏды шаркъээ̄ тӏәмӣ мӣ ыъкӏтӏуъ, сә барбекюәсы гьашәсы вэ̄гӯътӏ.


If it's barbecue you got a hankering for head on over to my uncle John's. Just about anything you could want he can cook up real nice if you give him enough meat and time. Don't ask him for none of that shit they make out East though, that ain't real barbecue.
О̄ Гыринч нэкӏытӏ мир нӯъ she хвәз вэ̄н әджәрӣъ синтӏды эвэ̄ ттӏилды, албәсы эвпӏә̄въкӏ


Ope the Grinch just died because she wanted to go chase the dragon on her own, that kinda sucks


Китә̄бы пӏырәппыъәс чӏиррәкӏ до̄ттӏнӣ хханэ бытӏ. Нигӯътӏ кӏэнчӏ тӏӯъ тӣтӏды япӏ гьу двиъсинттӏдэды уъртӏмэ̄ чӏӯ, тӏви вә̄нд кӏокӏтӏычӏәд имитӏиъ джо̄ш виъсэ̄. Ӏә̄дә̄бә̄ вит ым ләйктӏ бы̄ъминдэ хая̄лнә̄м сәм та̄нтӏуъпӏтӏэыъ, ыъкӏа̄нәс мухтәлифэ̄, сәнчӏэ̄сы гӯътӏ оккӏ тӏвитиъ бы̄ъмәд гьашәд мәнцӏ.


A great book is like a close friend. No matter how many times you close it and come back to it, you'll always derive joy from reading it. Literature allows us to dive into a world of our imagination, in other words a distraction from the real world.
[[File:Guimin cookie.jpg|thumb]]
Ик пилотырг зәмә е̄мыргис синтӏгьэды нэ̄чӏэ пӏәччӏ сә иккы буъцәсы вӣдды хвәзэ̄сы бисквиӣ


How I look at the flight attendant during snack time so they know I'm awake and would like a cookie


Чӏӯсы ниминсы сә эв тимсә̄лис ынӣс ыъкӏмыънэ зәнцӏ гьу юрр сәтиъ гинэ тӏәш лләнцӏ гӯътӏ? Тӏви вэцӏухъма ръо̄н сәтиъ сидычӏәмәс хин накӏтӏды кортӏ, би кисәр сәтиъ би кин сәтиъ вӣдухъычӏәмәс хин накӏтӏды кортӏ? О̄ сә гӯътӏ, The Thinker!


What's the name of that one statue of the guy sitting on a rock with his fist on his chin? Do you think his butt gets sore from all the sitting or his hand or chin get sore from all the thinking? Oh that's what it was, The Thinker!
Голливуд-әсы нигьашәсы, виъсмисы актёрәсы мухис.


Hollywood isn't real, they're all paid actors.


Тә̄тӏуъ дәндәл... Тофәнг тыътӏуъ.


Steady... Fire.
Апӏтӏисы тӏирнилгушушс вайл кӏуэ ттӏилды мин ю̄ътӏ э̄ бәлэ малӯън


Unclear on what the hedgehog means but ykw hell yeah


Тэкра̄рм сәтиъ виркӏтӏ тӏуъччӏ, бәлэ, мин ю̄ътӏ сә гӯътӏ нэ̄чӏэ тӏӯъ о̄ста̄д сәтиъ нэкӏитӏиъды гьашэ̄. Тӏӯъ бэ̄нтӏычӏәм вӣдинтӏ, бә̄вр сә̄ъэ̄с огъэ̄рэ.


The repetitiveness of it is boring, yes, but it's the only way you'll truly master it. You know what they say, ten thousand hours and whatnot.
Тимс «ниакьете» «хин расиэ̄ми» зо̄пӏаркӏәд Wisconsin-әш сәнттӏ әдиъшш


'Unathletic' alligator with 'terrible arthritis' escapes Wisconsin zoo


Ик сә имчӏ сытрелбищрэ̄дэ ттӏилитӏиъкьи джо̄ш, мин ю̄ътӏ ВАГ-73-әсы, джо̄дэ̄с сә висэ̄с хин, исинтӏ дуъчч уът дыкӏрәды.


It'd be fun to take this one out on the range, but VAG-73s, especially in this good of condition, are hard to come by.
Ми би уъпӏәдиъмәнцӏ тӏәсы нэ̄всы вӣдытӏухъ ырэ ппирэ


My plundering ass thought this was a vessel upon the high seas


Ккӏа эвмәс "ретвит" сә сӯъринӣ ттытӏ. Чӏу мәън тиртӏ?


It says someone "retweeted" that picture. What does that mean?
Вэйпәс Temu-әш ген гишынӣс сә̄ъбнис бырэ̄тӏръӣ мәс пӏәупӏытӏ


The Temu vape reversed the cilantro soap gene in my brother


Ик почт электрон вицәпуръәд Нигериәд до̄тӏә нӯъ. Кӏу чӏӯниъ хин гьарац ми вит синтӏды тӏәмӣ ымтӏә, тӏәс вит 20млн₽ мэ̄ ӣнтӏцы, ик гӯътӏиъ ри!


I just got electronic mail from a Nigerian prince. He said that as soon as the money I sent him comes through he'll send me 20 million rubles, I'm rich!
Гьиърчӏа̄сысы гьиърчӏа̄сысы, Виттӏчӏа̄сысы виттӏчӏа̄сысы, Кӏыъркӏыъвсы кәмбчӏа̄сысы.


Miller is a miller, Taylor is a tailor, and Smith is a dentist.


Кӏатӏырг, мамэ̄ "сә̄ъгьир пӏакӏайф" накӏытӏ иттифа̄къ гьу нуъ кор га̄йтӏ гьайъ нәджәмисинэ, ик гьинэцӏ тә̄тӏгьэ, вӣ е-секс рп кансел эхэнтӏуъ, ик ирр рӯъгьнӣ тӏо опӏтӏ гәмбэсинигъ къа̄риш ноднипӏиттәш
==Multiple sentences==
Ыг екӏчӏа̄сәрыс пӏалуягэ̄мтиъ нибэ̄нтӏ руктӏэ̄. Гӯ тӏыътӏ тӏэ̄ образован сытандартизирован вис нииъмтӏухъыъды эрчӏэ̄ э̄ррэ̄ са̄дэ̄. Кӏу 51%эс нуфӯсис Каспялъукъэ вә̄нд дыквӣъ сӯърӣъ дәркӏтӏыъ са̄дэ̄, мацорд нуфӯсис ба̄тӏ ныроджэ̄ о̄мэ̄ гьу никӏадгэ̄. Са̄зимысы нә̄ъ сә ыъхтӏ атӏэл.


Kitten, mommy accidentally got "wizard high" and is now in the astral realm, we're gonna have to call off the e-sex rp, I can't find your soul amongst the gnashing teeth of fate
Speakers of Russo-Guimin do not speak correctly. It is only because they don't have sufficient access to good standardized schooling. In Kaspiysk only 51 percent of the population is literate in the standard language, the rest of the population speaks incorrectly on a daily and casual basis. As an organization we abhor this.




Иккы Karmandric Mossraven-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ пӏә̄ш митиъ тиртӏ
Әттӏма бырӯъ? Чӏӯниъ ик гьар тӏәмӣ ыъкӏтӏды, Ми вӣцӏухъ са̄дэ̄ тәба̄р сэ̄тиъ ыъттӏ миъгы шумә; гӯ кӏунәм биврәм пыриютӏәд гьӣкьӏинэ кӏырәв миъгы бытӏ.
Иккы Joranathon Thornblood-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ шафсәр митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Vortebel Graveheart-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ квартӏ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Thorandis Wolfpenus-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ мэс ыъкминытиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Grunduplunk Wormnugget-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ шәлг ттӏытӏуъ бәтт рәцӏәнэ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Dribbapindus Horsecorn-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ гьэ̄м шырапӏнэлиътиъ гэнэ̄тиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Eggnut Thunderbarf-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ милиътӏкъарӏ тӏәпӏыгъан вәппэ̄биъ тӣтӏәды бинк митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Jerbinkus Cheesetickle-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ суккакӏ ю̄ъсә̄ тӏипӏә̄ эвпӏә̄въкӏ  тӣтӏәды бинк митиъ тиртӏ


I am Karmandric Mossraven, you have my axe
Is she pure? When I ask that I'm only wondering whether or not her ancestry is mixed, many dogs from shelter in the area have mixed blood.
I am Joranathon Thornblood, you have my blade
I am Vortebel Graveheart, you have my hammer
I am Thorandis Wolfpenus, you have my bag of rocks
I am Grunduplunk Wormnugget, you have my turnip tied to a rope
I am Dribbapindus Horsecorn, you have my handful of loose shrapnel
I am Eggnut Thunderbarf, you have my old pumpkin filled with wasps
I am Jerbinkus Cheesetickle, you have my ladle full of fairly warm soup




Иккы Zankar Shadowmoon-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ шафсәр митиъ тиртӏ
Ыг сэ̄сы питбуләсы пәррикъ виъкӏәд Румыниэ ниминми Sighet-әми әмтӏә. Кӏо таркӣбәс тӏәшэ̄с родословнае̄с 70%әм такърӣбән питбулитиъ тыринтӏ. Ыг сә дыкӏтӏәыъ сиъфэ̄синэ бивринэ мә̄ттӣинэ гьу биохимическинэ тӏәшэ̄с. Кӏо эттэ̄лэ̄сы гӯънтӏды эве кӏимликӏәд иъркъис тӏәшэ̄с.
Иккы Dabeebel Kabeebel-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ Ккӏыър Уъпӏэгӯъсәртиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Thorganald Wizzberry-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ тӏа̄лъ кәмбәмтиъ гъареәмтиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Diagonus Hypotenork-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ нагецыс әджәрэ̄мтиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Slardanagrath Flenk-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ Юл Хә̄тиъ Нивиъдәнцӏ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Barfigan Chunderthrust-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ киса гӯъмынәс бинк ккьоныргәми гэнәми митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Jarensendulep Mordusplent-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ фанфик Kirby's Air Rider-әтиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Winky Peepins-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ вэ̄йырг митиъ кьёв тиртӏ


I am Zankar Shadowmoon, you have my sword
She's a rescued pit-bull from a town in Romania called Sighet. Her genealogical composition comprises of around 70% pitbull. This can be noticed in many of her physical and biochemical traits. Facets unique to her species' identity.
I am Dabeebel Kabeebel, you have my Dagger of the Underbeast
I am Thorganald Wizzberry, you have my bag of assorted teeth
I am Diagonus Hypotenork, you have my dragon nuggets
I am Slardanagrath Flenk, you have my Ointment of Uncertain Origin
I am Barfigan Chunderthrust, you have my pocket full of loose acorns
I am Jarensendulep Mordusplent, you have my Kirby's Air Rider fanfiction
I am Winky Peepins, you have my cool stick




Кӏу мӣттӏыъмбыд горилинигъ гьу гыризылинигъ тӏыънтӏкьима кӏәппӏытт?
Сә ккӏа дәъгътсы ширйә̄нинс тӏо 141сы/91сы, е бирк хин уъртӏмысы сәрэ̄. Ик рицэпӏтӏ диуретикәмтиъ кәм тӏэ̄ дӯтӏиъ сә кумагбыдэ̄, мин ю̄ътӏ тӏӯъ рацён тӏвитиъ нэкӏычӏ тӏиркӏтӏ иттӏ ю̄ътӏ шифә̄ӏ угь диркӏычӏрэ̄.
Гӯ жавабсы, тәъбәън, кӏәппӏытт гориләсы.
Би ымтӏуъ.
Гӯ огьӯрсы тӏәш са̄дәсы, гьу эв огьӯрсы са̄дэ̄.
Ыг кӏәппӏытт горил бягъакӏыс тыринтӏ, гьу сә бягъакӏыс быъгэнтӏыъ AR-15 афтӏаматӏәм двиъ-тирды.


What would win in a fight between a silverback gorilla and a grizzly bear?
It says here your blood pressure is 141/91, even higher than last time. I'll give you a prescription for some diuretics to help with that, but to see any improvement you really do need to change your diet.
The answer, of course, is a silverback gorilla.
Now hold on.
The reason for this is very simple, and it's only one reason.
A silverback gorilla has fingers, and it can use those fingers to dual-wield AR-15 assault rifles.




Такърӣбән ккӏа «кӏу хин пирог митиъ бәвкӏтӏ»
Кӏуэ уъртӏмэ виъсэ ик вит тӏви сә компютэр бәвкӏтӏыъды, М кьавиш акӏтӏ иначӏ виъсэ̄? Тӏви вӣцӏухъ кьавишэ̄с итӏэрэ̄с кәм хин ыъсинтӏкьиды пычац мин ю̄ътӏ вэ̄, сә са̄дэ̄. Чинаграмэ̄сы микравалнофкэ̄с дыкӏтӏә нӯъ уъртӏмэ виъсэ ик кӏо̄ш бы̄ътӏды бәвг.


Such as "who the hell is eating my pie"
Why is it that every time I let you use this computer the M key always gets stuck? You'd think at least some other keys would be messed up but no, just that one. Now every time I try to type it looks like a transcript of a microwave.




Синтӏинтӏиндэ гӯънцӏ гьарпацӏ ябыкъмппӏэ нә̄ъм, эттэз бэ̄нтӏды кӏу "Твә̄р тӣтӏуъ ппё чӏуъ ы̄в тӣнтӏыъ гьарпацӏ." Кӏу ми "Ни, ик мит нибытӏ та̄тӏ нукӏтӏэ̄, ппёмэ мәс двиъсинтӏинтӏуъиндэ," мин ю̄ътӏ кӏэнинтӏ лыцӏакӏ туърмәс ккӏыърэ̄с гьу ккәлэ̄с ттәнцӏ. Ик ләйктӏ динэрдыъмбыд синтӏытӏ каркар ппанцӏ гьу синтӏнинтӏәдды иъшш. Ик нипӏитт бы̄ътӏ пӏәччӏ гьар тӏэ̄ екӏды вит возмещени сыттӏ ми тӏэ̄тӏссәцы ыджэ̄, ик тӏуъ тыътӏ боркь мэ̄ ытӏухъды. Мәссимба̄ла̄.
Басәйн 10:00инигъ 20:00инигъ гӯътӏ ппё. Сәм, нӣш «НЕ КУРИТЬ»итиъ дыкӏтӏуъ;
тӏуъ сә сигарэтӏ тэтӏиъбыдкьи гӯъинәдды хвәз ттӏилитӏиъдыссә.


They came in drunk after we closed, demanding "Open the door so we can drink." I said "No, I don't have wine at night, come back when I open," but they started to lever the doors with knives and rods. I jumped up to the roof shouting and so they ran off. I therefore write to ask you to send for compensation if I'm justified, so I get what I'm due. Best wishes.
The pool is open from 10:00 to 20:00. Also, mind the No Smoking sign; you can finish that cigarette outside if you'd like.




[[File:Guimin tweet 1.png|thumb]]
Бибәшшэ̄д хин, сәшшид Глебов, Нә̄ъ сә пӏалтӏ тӏвитиъ ттитӏиъыъ ла̄втӏ тӏукӏэ̄. Луътфән сыпа митиъ бәвкӏтӏуъ сәбыдэ̄, хъывэ̄ возмещениэ̄сы ниудопстәш.
сон. тӏәрнерәм. ыг «JAPAN expo»дэ синтӏычӏ ттӏил е джо̄ш. миръәдж байрамӣ до̄леисӣ та̄тӏ еркӏи. до̄лэ̄сы сәм әттӏ мигъ гьу цӏиръ хин. вин. яоиәмәс уъпӏинтӏ. бәлэ ю̄ъс о̄с мэ̄ дыкӏытӏ рукӏтӏэ̄. яоиәсы. июл 14э байрамсы до̄леисы ватӏинс мигъәш мәс. ыг сә о̄мэ, вин яоиәмәс уъпӏинтӏ.


hier. des jeunes. ils preferent aller a la Japan expo. plutot que feter la fete nationale. notre si grand et beau pays. ils achetent. des yaois. oui mous m'avez bien entendu. des yaois. le 14 julliet la fete nationale notre grand patrie. ce jour la ils achetentdu yaoi
I'm so sorry Mr. Glebov, we can get that coat of yours cleaned up shortly. In the meantime, please help yourself to our spa free of charge as compensation for the inconvenience.


yesterday. the youth. they prefer going to JAPAN expo. instead of celebrating the national holiday. our country so big and beautiful. they buy. yaois. yes you heard me right. yaois. the 14th of july the national holiday our big homeland. this day, they buy yaoi.


Бэ̄ръ руктӏ, ыг сә дә̄рӣтӏуъсы дуъсыгъәсы. Кӏу гъуллакъинсы тӏәш?


Кӏу нәвъсы эукариотэ̄с сәсы? Бибәшшэ̄д, ми кӏиәш нииттӏ са̄дэ̄.
I'm gonna be honest, that was too long. What's the gist of it?


What kind of eukaryote is that? Sorry, I'm just not from around here.


Кӏу тәълӣм тӏвитиъ дӯнтӏычӏ диншэ̄ хин иттиълә̄ъис, әгәрчи тэ̄нтӏ пӏырәппыъ пәррикъ э̄нмнӣ гьу ка̄гъәмәс имчӏинэ, вит е хин ниимтӏәухъ. Ми якӏэтӏиъкьи тӏӯъ нипӏитт двиъбӣънтӏды вӣдрәгьэыъэ̄ е әттыэ̄.


Ыг эукариотэ̄с сә о̄мә̄ээ̄ вэдинтӏухъ эве хин га̄йнтӏды. «Ӯ ик сэлулм тӏырӣ тыринтӏ нӯъ, ми квырки хин әттӏма?» вирг кӏатӏуъ мацордиъсыэ̄ нә̄ъм. Гӯ ик дәъякъ упӏитӏиъкьи сэлулм дуъсыгъә̄с лар тты̄нәсды мәнтӏиъ гьәъшшәд ни эонигъ эв хин гьу сә виъсм тэ̄нтӏды вэ̄вэдәнтӏиъ.
Giving your teachings in a such a information-dense way, while great for saving breath and paper, makes them much less accessible. I'd suggest you re-write them in a way that's more easily parseable.


Eukaryotes these days think they're so special. "Wow I have three cells now aren't I so quirky?" get a job like the rest of us. I bet in not even an eon they'll be hoarding too many cells to count and not even know what all of them do.


Ик гьәълтӏ эвэ сә буравае̄м Palestine-әмиэ та̄тӏ та̄тӏ. Чӏӯниъ сә ы̄в гӯънтӏэды нӯъ э̄нкӏтӏ тӏуъччӏ, вит ы̄в двитӏӣъмдэ синтӏинтӏ. Гъё̄мәсы хин.


Да̄стиныс виъсә̄с ккӏа, ми сәнтӏитӏиъкьи иъшш е тӏукӏэ̄ ик гьәъч сә дыро̄вӣ тә̄тӏссә.
I work on one of them oil rigs by Palestine (Texas). Once the one we're at now comes up empty they'll send us over to the next one. Hell of a way to make a living.
Әгәрчи тита̄тӏ, әмтӏухъчӏәсы са̄дэ̄ мәс интӏвицыэ̄сы кӏӯгьәд сә дәр ццӏапӏыгъан ита̄тӏ мәджнӯн сәнтӏитӏиъкьичӏәш ''такэ̄'' иъшш гӯътӏ.


The legends all say that if I ate the fruit from this tree I would run faster. Now that I have though, all I've gained is the feeling that I ''should'' run faster from whatever possessed that old tree.


Тӏви барбекюә̄ гӯътӏссә мац, динэ мэ̄тӏбырэ̄тӏръис мәс John синттӏуъ. Тӏәс нугь такърӣбән тӏӯъ хвәз ттӏәлтӏкьиды уъпӏтӏыъ пӏырәппыъэ̄ хин тӏӯъ мӣм гьу зәм эрчӏ тӏәмӣ ттутӏиъссә. Әгәрчи гьар нугьдэ хин выгинтӏды тынэнтӏды шаркъээ̄ тӏәмӣ мӣ ыъкӏтӏуъ, сә барбекюәсы гьашәсы вэ̄гӯътӏ.


Зыз бӣн бырэдж, зыз зыз бӣн бырэдж. Икми синттӏуъ гьу вит бо̄шшәм виъсә̄с дыкӏрә!
If it's barbecue you got a hankering for head on over to my uncle John's. Just about anything you could want he can cook up real nice if you give him enough meat and time. Don't ask him for none of that shit they make out East though, that ain't real barbecue.


Buzz little bee, buzz buzz little bee. Come along and find all the flowers with me!


Китә̄бы пӏырәппыъәс чӏиррәкӏ до̄ттӏнӣ хханэ бытӏ. Нигӯътӏ кӏэнчӏ тӏӯъ тӣтӏды япӏ гьу двиъсинттӏдэды уъртӏмэ̄ чӏӯ, тӏви вә̄нд кӏокӏтӏычӏәд имитӏиъ джо̄ш виъсэ̄. Ӏә̄дә̄бә̄ вит ым ләйктӏ бы̄ъминдэ хая̄лнә̄м сәм та̄нтӏуъпӏтӏэыъ, ыъкӏа̄нәс мухтәлифэ̄, сәнчӏэ̄сы гӯътӏ оккӏ тӏвитиъ бы̄ъмәд гьашәд мәнцӏ.
A great book is like a close friend. No matter how many times you close it and come back to it, you'll always derive joy from reading it. Literature allows us to dive into a world of our imagination, in other words a distraction from the real world.


Къа̄нӯными авиацыэ̄с виъды̄нәс виъсәмы сәмвоккӏәд, бӣнәс пӏэкк ӣтӏыъ такэ̄ ни угьэ̄. Пӏэккәм исинтӏ бырэдж дуъсыгъэ̄ билтӏ тӏуъм бырэдж сәтиъ буътнуъпӏәд тирыъндэды. Бӣнәс, тәъбәън, пӏэкк ӣтӏ ни кӏэнчӏ. Э̄ррэ̄ бӣнә̄с кӏадг сәнчӏэ̄мәс мәнвис нитты̄нәсыъчӏэ вӣдинтӏухъды нидӯнтӏ.


According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyways. Because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
Чӏӯсы ниминсы сә эв тимсә̄лис ынӣс ыъкӏмыънэ зәнцӏ гьу юрр сәтиъ гинэ тӏәш лләнцӏ гӯътӏ? Тӏви вэцӏухъма ръо̄н сәтиъ сидычӏәмәс хин накӏтӏды кортӏ, би кисәр сәтиъ би кин сәтиъ вӣдухъычӏәмәс хин накӏтӏды кортӏ? О̄ сә гӯътӏ, The Thinker!


What's the name of that one statue of the guy sitting on a rock with his fist on his chin? Do you think his butt gets sore from all the sitting or his hand or chin get sore from all the thinking? Oh that's what it was, The Thinker!


«Quick brown fox» матын чаме эттэзе баръиъбиъ әърәбӣс бырӯъос, кӏо̄ш сәвътӣэ̄мәс гьу нәъгьыввӣ бӣъды са̄дэ̄. Рэ̄дыкэ̄сы кӏыриъччэ̄сы га̄йтӏ пӏӯв, гьу тӏиркӏтӏерәм виъсәм ик виъдәнцӏухъды нӯъбыд воккӏытиъ гьу нипӏиттитиъ (сингармонизмәми) чӏиррәкӏимбыд әъсрӣимбыд ттӏилинтӏычӏәсы мәс гӯътӏ двиъчӏ


obligatory quick brown fox sample text using entirely arabic words just to test out phonetics and grammar. first is the definite proto, and second is me implementing all sound and ortho changes (including the vowel harmony) ive thought of so far into what the modern may end up looking like
Тә̄тӏуъ дәндәл... Тофәнг тыътӏуъ.


Steady... Fire.


[[File:Moon Jiujutsu.jpg|thumb]]
уът ми пӏэкк мӣндэ
уът ми бӣътӏ хин хуй
уът сә вӣдытӏчӏэ мәс мидиркӏтӏ
кӏурсәд джиу-джитсуәш мӣнис мәс


fly me to the moon
Тэкра̄рм сәтиъ виркӏтӏ тӏуъччӏ, бәлэ, мин ю̄ътӏ сә гӯътӏ нэ̄чӏэ тӏӯъ о̄ста̄д сәтиъ нэкӏитӏиъды гьашэ̄. Тӏӯъ бэ̄нтӏычӏәм вӣдинтӏ, бә̄вр сә̄ъэ̄с огъэ̄рэ.
let me kick is fucking ass
let me show it what I learned
in my moon jujitsu class


The repetitiveness of it is boring, yes, but it's the only way you'll truly master it. You know what they say, ten thousand hours and whatnot.


[[File:Chronically outside.jpg|thumb]]
мән сә иттӏинәд хроническэ̄
ппанцӏинигъчӏ кӏукӏтӏ тэ̄нтӏ кӏу
О̄О̄О̄о̄о̄о̄ э̄, сә чӏиппэкӏ двә̄ гьә̄ъцӏвис хвәз семичкӣъ сәм ттӏилды тир ХИН


person who is chronically outside
Ик сә имчӏ сытрелбищрэ̄дэ ттӏилитӏиъкьи джо̄ш, мин ю̄ътӏ ВАГ-73-әсы, джо̄дэ̄с сә висэ̄с хин, исинтӏ дуъчч уът дыкӏрәды.
they see discourse and just go
HOOOooo man, this is JUST like when two sparrows want the same sunflower seed


It'd be fun to take this one out on the range, but VAG-73s, especially in this good of condition, are hard to come by.


[[File:Country Gnomes.jpg|thumb]]
гномәм до̄лэ̄с,
уттӏыс митиъ минтӏуъ
джа̄гдэ,
хиттӏэнтӏды такэ̄
э̄ сәнчӏэ̄сы хин сәсы такърӣбән огьӯрсы пӏытт митиъ сә вебсайтәд тӣды тӏиркӏтӏ әттӏ дыъчч га̄йтӏ хин. Джа̄гэ чӏу адуъкӏ, мэ̄ екӏтӏуъ, сә нәвъ апсурд джо̄де вит дыкӏтӏә.
west virginia


country gnomes,
Ккӏа эвмәс "ретвит" сә сӯъринӣ ттытӏ. Чӏу мәън тиртӏ?
take my bones
 
to a place,
It says someone "retweeted" that picture. What does that mean?
they don't belong
see shit like this is the reason that it's so hard to turn my back on this website. Where else, pray tell, are you going to find this kind of quality nonsense.
west virginia




[[File:Comfy Bed.jpg|thumb]]
Ик почт электрон вицәпуръәд Нигериәд до̄тӏә нӯъ. Кӏу чӏӯниъ хин гьарац ми вит синтӏды тӏәмӣ ымтӏә, тӏәс вит 20млн₽ мэ̄ ӣнтӏцы, ик гӯътӏиъ ри!
мәнг гэнырг. ми диндэ имтӏуъ. ми тӏэ̄тӏды такэ̄. гъайб ёргъ. ссәнцӏ хин. ми диндэ имтӏуъ. мәнг гэнырг.


comfy bed. take me home. to the place. where i belong. pillow blanky. sleeping soundly. take me home. comfy bed.
I just got electronic mail from a Nigerian prince. He said that as soon as the money I sent him comes through he'll send me 20 million rubles, I'm rich!




[[File:Welcome to the Jungle Guimin.jpg|thumb]]
Кӏатӏырг, мамэ̄ "сә̄ъгьир пӏакӏайф" накӏытӏ иттифа̄къ гьу нуъ кор га̄йтӏ гьайъ нәджәмисинэ, ик гьинэцӏ тә̄тӏгьэ, вӣ е-секс рп кансел эхэнтӏуъ, ик ирр рӯъгьнӣ тӏо опӏтӏ гәмбэсинигъ къа̄риш ноднипӏиттәш
Маргьәъбән джәнгәлэ
Нә̄ъ дәрвис диврә̄с тыринтӏ
Нә̄ъ виъсм тӏӯъ хвәз ттӏилды тиртӏ
Сә сәнчӏэ̄сы дыро̄всы гӯънтӏссә


Welcome to the jungle
Kitten, mommy accidentally got "wizard high" and is now in the astral realm, we're gonna have to call off the e-sex rp, I can't find your soul amongst the gnashing teeth of fate
We've got lots of trees
We've got everything you want
If that thing is trees




ГӮЪТӀКЬИ ГОСПӀОД ОПОССУМ
Иккы Karmandric Mossraven-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ пӏә̄ш митиъ тиртӏ
«Госпӏод Опоссум, ик тӏви рыцардэ ттӏилтӏ»
Иккы Joranathon Thornblood-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ шафсәр митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Vortebel Graveheart-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ квартӏ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Thorandis Wolfpenus-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ мэс ыъкминытиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Grunduplunk Wormnugget-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ шәлг ттӏытӏуъ бәтт рәцӏәнэ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Dribbapindus Horsecorn-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ гьэ̄м шырапӏнэлиътиъ гэнэ̄тиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Eggnut Thunderbarf-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ милиътӏкъарӏ тӏәпӏыгъан вәппэ̄биъ тӣтӏәды бинк митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Jerbinkus Cheesetickle-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ суккакӏ ю̄ъсә̄ тӏипӏә̄ эвпӏә̄въкӏ  тӣтӏәды бинк митиъ тиртӏ


LONG LIVE SIR POSSUM
I am Karmandric Mossraven, you have my axe
"Sir Possum, I knight thee"
I am Joranathon Thornblood, you have my blade
I am Vortebel Graveheart, you have my hammer
I am Thorandis Wolfpenus, you have my bag of rocks
I am Grunduplunk Wormnugget, you have my turnip tied to a rope
I am Dribbapindus Horsecorn, you have my handful of loose shrapnel
I am Eggnut Thunderbarf, you have my old pumpkin filled with wasps
I am Jerbinkus Cheesetickle, you have my ladle full of fairly warm soup




The word person starts with the M sound. Ma, ama, am.
Иккы Zankar Shadowmoon-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ шафсәр митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Dabeebel Kabeebel-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ Ккӏыър Уъпӏэгӯъсәртиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Thorganald Wizzberry-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ тӏа̄лъ кәмбәмтиъ гъареәмтиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Diagonus Hypotenork-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ нагецыс әджәрэ̄мтиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Slardanagrath Flenk-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ Юл Хә̄тиъ Нивиъдәнцӏ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Barfigan Chunderthrust-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ киса гӯъмынәс бинк ккьоныргәми гэнәми митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Jarensendulep Mordusplent-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ фанфик Kirby's Air Rider-әтиъ митиъ тиртӏ
Иккы Winky Peepins-әсы, ыг тӏӯъ вэ̄йырг митиъ кьёв тиртӏ
 
I am Zankar Shadowmoon, you have my sword
I am Dabeebel Kabeebel, you have my Dagger of the Underbeast
I am Thorganald Wizzberry, you have my bag of assorted teeth
I am Diagonus Hypotenork, you have my dragon nuggets
I am Slardanagrath Flenk, you have my Ointment of Uncertain Origin
I am Barfigan Chunderthrust, you have my pocket full of loose acorns
I am Jarensendulep Mordusplent, you have my Kirby's Air Rider fanfiction
I am Winky Peepins, you have my cool stick


Гӯ баръиъс мән воккӏэ М кӏантӏ. Ма, а-ма, ам.


Кӏу мӣттӏыъмбыд горилинигъ гьу гыризылинигъ тӏыънтӏкьима кӏәппӏытт?
Гӯ жавабсы, тәъбәън, кӏәппӏытт гориләсы.
Би ымтӏуъ.
Гӯ огьӯрсы тӏәш са̄дәсы, гьу эв огьӯрсы са̄дэ̄.
Ыг кӏәппӏытт горил бягъакӏыс тыринтӏ, гьу сә бягъакӏыс быъгэнтӏыъ AR-15 афтӏаматӏәм двиъ-тирды.
What would win in a fight between a silverback gorilla and a grizzly bear?
The answer, of course, is a silverback gorilla.
Now hold on.
The reason for this is very simple, and it's only one reason.
A silverback gorilla has fingers, and it can use those fingers to dual-wield AR-15 assault rifles.


Бэ̄ръ икми якӏтӏәгьэ. ''Мән''. Ә дыкӏтӏуъ кӏыриъчч тӣ рукӏтӏэ̄. Ни ''мәън'', ''мән''.


Sound out the word with me. ''Person''. Be sure to get the Ä right. Not ''meaning'', ''person''.
Такърӣбән ккӏа «кӏу хин пирог митиъ бәвкӏтӏ»


Such as "who the hell is eating my pie"


Ривалюцыэ̄сы Сәънӏэ̄с гьу артинксы тӏәш фә̄джиъэ̄сы бәшаринӣ ӣттӏ. Мутт гайджэ̄тиъ сәм до̄лэ̄сэ «пиръәфтэ» ттӏанцӏды воркӏтӏ е биврэ̄ хин, мин ю̄ътӏ вит ынкӏэрутив ӣттӏ нидырӯ, вит гайдж ӣттӏ нитӏыпӏтӏ, вит мәнвис карә̄м нибибытӏ, вит әъза̄б психологическ (тӏыриътӏ бы̄ъмэ әъза̄б мә̄ттӣ сәм) киттӏакӏ нинуътӏ, зарар хин бы̄ъминӣ тәъбӣъэ тита̄тӏ. тихнологиэ̄ дэвэлопӏ та̄мынәс та̄мынәсчӏәс вит ттӏанцӏчӏ тӣтӏиъ дуъш. Тәъбәън вит мәнвис карә̄мәд е бивр имәнтӏиъ гьу зарар хин бы̄ъминӣ тәъбӣъэ тӣтӏиъ, якъӣн вит нидырӯм ынкӏэрутивнтиъ гьу әъза̄б психологическ е кӏэнитӏиъ, вит әъза̄б мә̄ттӣ до̄лэ̄сэ «пиръәфтэ» е кӏэнитӏиъкьи.


The Industrial Revolution and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race. They have greatly increased the life-expectancy of those of us who live in “advanced” countries, but they have destabilized society, have made life unfulfilling, have subjected human beings to indignities, have led to widespread psychological suffering (in the Third World to physical suffering as well) and have inflicted severe damage on the natural world. The continued development of technology will worsen the situation. It will certainly subject human beings to greater indignities and inflict greater damage on the natural world, it will probably lead to greater social disruption and psychological suffering, and it may lead to increased physical suffering even in “advanced” countries.
Синтӏинтӏиндэ гӯънцӏ гьарпацӏ ябыкъмппӏэ нә̄ъм, эттэз бэ̄нтӏды кӏу "Твә̄р тӣтӏуъ ппё чӏуъ ы̄в тӣнтӏыъ гьарпацӏ." Кӏу ми "Ни, ик мит нибытӏ та̄тӏ нукӏтӏэ̄, ппёмэ мәс двиъсинтӏинтӏуъиндэ," мин ю̄ътӏ кӏэнинтӏ лыцӏакӏ туърмәс ккӏыърэ̄с гьу ккәлэ̄с ттәнцӏ. Ик ләйктӏ динэрдыъмбыд синтӏытӏ каркар ппанцӏ гьу синтӏнинтӏәдды иъшш. Ик нипӏитт бы̄ътӏ пӏәччӏ гьар тӏэ̄ екӏды вит возмещени сыттӏ ми тӏэ̄тӏссәцы ыджэ̄, ик тӏуъ тыътӏ боркь мэ̄ ытӏухъды. Мәссимба̄ла̄.


They came in drunk after we closed, demanding "Open the door so we can drink." I said "No, I don't have wine at night, come back when I open," but they started to lever the doors with knives and rods. I jumped up to the roof shouting and so they ran off. I therefore write to ask you to send for compensation if I'm justified, so I get what I'm due. Best wishes.


[[File:Medieval Cats.png|thumb]]
Катуъсы Къарнысинэ Мичинэ:
*гьәълтӏ вис та̄нәнцӏ
*кәлӣсдэ иънәнцӏ
*кӏэнгэ̄с сәрэ̄е иънәнцӏ
*ынкӏэрутивинӣ дуънәнцӏ
Катуъсы нӯъ:
*тәмбәл гьу умәдур
*кә̄фирс
*тәмбәл дуъсыгъ кӏэнгэ̄с сәрэ̄е ӣтӏды


Cats in Middle Ages:
[[File:Guimin tweet 1.png|thumb]]
*hard working
сон. тӏәрнерәм. ыг «JAPAN expo»дэ синтӏычӏ ттӏил е джо̄ш. миръәдж байрамӣ до̄леисӣ та̄тӏ еркӏи. до̄лэ̄сы сәм әттӏ мигъ гьу цӏиръ хин. вин. яоиәмәс уъпӏинтӏ. бәлэ ю̄ъс о̄с мэ̄ дыкӏытӏ рукӏтӏэ̄. яоиәсы. июл 14э байрамсы до̄леисы ватӏинс мигъәш мәс. ыг сә о̄мэ, вин яоиәмәс уъпӏинтӏ.
*went to church
*walked on hind legs
*contributed to society
Cats now:
*lazy and ungrateful
*atheists
*too lazy to walk on hind legs


hier. des jeunes. ils preferent aller a la Japan expo. plutot que feter la fete nationale. notre si grand et beau pays. ils achetent. des yaois. oui mous m'avez bien entendu. des yaois. le 14 julliet la fete nationale notre grand patrie. ce jour la ils achetentdu yaoi


[[File:Guimin Landlord.png|thumb]]
yesterday. the youth. they prefer going to JAPAN expo. instead of celebrating the national holiday. our country so big and beautiful. they buy. yaois. yes you heard me right. yaois. the 14th of july the national holiday our big homeland. this day, they buy yaoi.
Хозяйн Тӏӣтӏә Бӣт Рентӏ Ттӏәлтӏыъндэды Э̄ррэ̄ Пакъинӣ Е Мигьэ Вӣдытӏухъ


Landlord Forced To Raise Rent Due To Thinking Of Bigger Number


Кӏу нәвъсы эукариотэ̄с сәсы? Бибәшшэ̄д, ми кӏиәш нииттӏ са̄дэ̄.


[[File:Guimin Bear.jpg|thumb]]
What kind of eukaryote is that? Sorry, I'm just not from around here.
Сә гӯътӏ
Агь
Сытӏәнцӏ сәтиъ екӏтӏуърэ̄ роспинэ джәрәнинэ


There he is
Bear
His arrival was foretold in ancient murals.


Ыг эукариотэ̄с сә о̄мә̄ээ̄ вэдинтӏухъ эве хин га̄йнтӏды. «Ӯ ик сэлулм тӏырӣ тыринтӏ нӯъ, ми квырки хин әттӏма?» вирг кӏатӏуъ мацордиъсыэ̄ нә̄ъм. Гӯ ик дәъякъ упӏитӏиъкьи сэлулм дуъсыгъә̄с лар тты̄нәсды мәнтӏиъ гьәъшшәд ни эонигъ эв хин гьу сә виъсм тэ̄нтӏды вэ̄вэдәнтӏиъ.
Eukaryotes these days think they're so special. "Wow I have three cells now aren't I so quirky?" get a job like the rest of us. I bet in not even an eon they'll be hoarding too many cells to count and not even know what all of them do.


[[File:Guimin Floorboards.jpg|thumb]]
БУЪТ ӢТӀ ТЭ̄НТӀ ВИЪПӀЫ КАКМӘСӘРЭ̄ ВИЪСЭ̄
ИК ПӀАЛАВИЦЭ̄С МИТИЪ ТТӀӘЛНИНТӏИНЭ НЫРОДЖЭ̄


THE GROUND TREMBLES WITH MY EVERY STEP
Да̄стиныс виъсә̄с ккӏа, ми сәнтӏитӏиъкьи иъшш е тӏукӏэ̄ ик гьәъч сә дыро̄вӣ тә̄тӏссә.
I HAVE INSTALLED MY FLOORBOARDS INCORRECTLY
Әгәрчи тита̄тӏ, әмтӏухъчӏәсы са̄дэ̄ мәс интӏвицыэ̄сы кӏӯгьәд сә дәр ццӏапӏыгъан ита̄тӏ мәджнӯн сәнтӏитӏиъкьичӏәш ''такэ̄'' иъшш гӯътӏ.


The legends all say that if I ate the fruit from this tree I would run faster. Now that I have though, all I've gained is the feeling that I ''should'' run faster from whatever possessed that old tree.


Двә̄ Кӏонтӏорэ̄с Джәрим Тә̄тӏә Несоблюдениэ̄с Нон Запӏравкӏэ̄сэ Minnesota-әш


Two Companies Fined for Violations at Nine Minnesota Gas Stations
Зыз бӣн бырэдж, зыз зыз бӣн бырэдж. Икми синттӏуъ гьу вит бо̄шшәм виъсә̄с дыкӏрә!


Buzz little bee, buzz buzz little bee. Come along and find all the flowers with me!


Ми вӣцӏ тӏӯъ вәд сыттӏыъды висэ̄, мин ю̄ътӏ кьӏӯтӏәсы гӯътӏ тӏӯътӏы дуъсыгъэ̄. Луътфән кьӏа̄тӏигъ синттӏуъ, километырәм пӏә̄въкӏә̄с са̄дэ̄ кӏиъсәд ттӏэнтӏ.


I know you're a good swimmer, but the current is too strong. Please just go across the bridge, it's only a few kilometers from here.
Къа̄нӯными авиацыэ̄с виъды̄нәс виъсәмы сәмвоккӏәд, бӣнәс пӏэкк ӣтӏыъ такэ̄ ни угьэ̄. Пӏэккәм исинтӏ бырэдж дуъсыгъэ̄ билтӏ тӏуъм бырэдж сәтиъ буътнуъпӏәд тирыъндэды. Бӣнәс, тәъбәън, пӏэкк ӣтӏ ни кӏэнчӏ. Э̄ррэ̄ бӣнә̄с кӏадг сәнчӏэ̄мәс мәнвис нитты̄нәсыъчӏэ вӣдинтӏухъды нидӯнтӏ.


According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyways. Because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.


Э̄ ТӀВИ
МӘН КЬЁВ
СЫПАС ИКМИ СИЦӀДЫ 🙂
ИК ТТӀИЛЫТӀ ДЖО̄Ш ХИИИИИИН 🙂
ТӀВИ ДИНДЭ МӘС СИНТТӀ ТАКЭ̄ НАЧЁКЭ̄
МӘ̄ТӀСӘР МӘС ПОПКОР НӘ̄С УПӀИТӀИЪ
ГЬУ ВӘТ ЫМ КИНОМ 12+ ДЫКӀӘНТӀИЪ
ГЬУ ИК ВИТ ТӀВИ СӘ ТТӀИЛИТӀИЪӘД
Э̄РРЭ̄ ТӀӮЪСЫ БӘЧ ДОТТАГЪЫСЫ МӘС


HEY YOU
«Quick brown fox» матын чаме эттэзе баръиъбиъ әърәбӣс бырӯъос, кӏо̄ш сәвътӣэ̄мәс гьу нәъгьыввӣ бӣъды са̄дэ̄. Рэ̄дыкэ̄сы кӏыриъччэ̄сы га̄йтӏ пӏӯв, гьу тӏиркӏтӏерәм виъсәм ик виъдәнцӏухъды нӯъбыд воккӏытиъ гьу нипӏиттитиъ (сингармонизмәми) чӏиррәкӏимбыд әъсрӣимбыд ттӏилинтӏычӏәсы мәс гӯътӏ двиъчӏ
COOL GUY
THANKS FOR HANGING OUT WITH ME 🙂
I HAD A LOOOOOOT OF FUN 🙂
YOU SHOULD COME TO MY HOUSE FOR A SLEEPOVER
MY MOM WILL MAKE US POPPYCORN
AND LET US WATCH PG-13 MOVIES
AND I'LL LET YOU PICK
BECAUSE YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND


obligatory quick brown fox sample text using entirely arabic words just to test out phonetics and grammar. first is the definite proto, and second is me implementing all sound and ortho changes (including the vowel harmony) ive thought of so far into what the modern may end up looking like


Э̄кь вӣърэ упӏтӏкьи гьу гӯътӏиъ тӏипӏ о̄мныънэ эв. Э̄кь вӣърэ вит нэкӏтӏкьи гьу гӯътӏиъ тӏипӏ мацордйыънэ гӯътӏэ̄с


Build a man a fire and he will be warm for one day. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
[[File:Moon Jiujutsu.jpg|thumb]]
уът ми пӏэкк мӣндэ
уът ми бӣътӏ хин хуй
уът сә вӣдытӏчӏэ мәс мидиркӏтӏ
кӏурсәд джиу-джитсуәш мӣнис мәс


fly me to the moon
let me kick is fucking ass
let me show it what I learned
in my moon jujitsu class


Кӏуън кӏорчымэ̄индэ синтӏытӏ гьу екӏатӏ «ик нугь никӏукӏтӏыъ, ик тӏәмӣ ппёэ̄ упӏитӏиъ.»


A dog walked into a tavern and said "I can’t see a thing, I'll open this one."
[[File:Chronically outside.jpg|thumb]]
мән сә иттӏинәд хроническэ̄
ппанцӏинигъчӏ кӏукӏтӏ тэ̄нтӏ кӏу
О̄О̄О̄о̄о̄о̄ э̄, сә чӏиппэкӏ двә̄ гьә̄ъцӏвис хвәз семичкӣъ сәм ттӏилды тир ХИН


person who is chronically outside
they see discourse and just go
HOOOooo man, this is JUST like when two sparrows want the same sunflower seed


Нәгн, Нәгн; о̄ әъджәб (митиъ).
Нәгн, Нәгн; сәнттӏуърэ̄дэ мэ̄ пӏа̄ккӏ дуътӏ.


Bread, Bread; oh wonder (of mine).
[[File:Country Gnomes.jpg|thumb]]
Bread, Bread; come feed me.
гномәм до̄лэ̄с,
уттӏыс митиъ минтӏуъ
джа̄гдэ,
хиттӏэнтӏды такэ̄
э̄ сәнчӏэ̄сы хин сәсы такърӣбән огьӯрсы пӏытт митиъ сә вебсайтәд тӣды тӏиркӏтӏ әттӏ дыъчч га̄йтӏ хин. Джа̄гэ чӏу адуъкӏ, мэ̄ екӏтӏуъ, сә нәвъ апсурд джо̄де вит дыкӏтӏә.
west virginia


country gnomes,
take my bones
to a place,
they don't belong
see shit like this is the reason that it's so hard to turn my back on this website. Where else, pray tell, are you going to find this kind of quality nonsense.
west virginia


Дунайәд Волгадэ! ръӯе̄сы двә̄, до̄лэ̄сы эв!


From the Danube to the Volga! - Two rivers, One nation!
[[File:Comfy Bed.jpg|thumb]]
мәнг гэнырг. ми диндэ имтӏуъ. ми тӏэ̄тӏды такэ̄. гъайб ёргъ. ссәнцӏ хин. ми диндэ имтӏуъ. мәнг гэнырг.


comfy bed. take me home. to the place. where i belong. pillow blanky. sleeping soundly. take me home. comfy bed.


Баркалааа ик гьуъпп гъайбмәс ттӏытӏ! Әсинтӏ мыд гьу та̄нрәыъ гынэчӏ гьу ик гьуъпп гыркисӣ та̄нтӏычӏэ ттӏытӏ!


hiii i love pillows! they're soft and squishy and i love hugging them!
[[File:Welcome to the Jungle Guimin.jpg|thumb]]
Маргьәъбән джәнгәлэ
Нә̄ъ дәрвис диврә̄с тыринтӏ
Нә̄ъ виъсм тӏӯъ хвәз ттӏилды тиртӏ
Сә сәнчӏэ̄сы дыро̄всы гӯънтӏссә


Welcome to the jungle
We've got lots of trees
We've got everything you want
If that thing is trees


Ыг компютэрәс тӏо пӏаникӏ ядрэ̄ дәркӏытӏухъ гьу тынтӏ ю̄ътӏ виъкӏэн. Кьавиш бы̄ътӏуъ би мытӏуъ сә̄нӣэ̄ кәм синтӏычӏрэ̄ тӏо.


Your computer has experienced a kernel panic and had to restart. Press a key or wait a few seconds to continue.
ГӮЪТӀКЬИ ГОСПӀОД ОПОССУМ
«Госпӏод Опоссум, ик тӏви рыцардэ ттӏилтӏ»
 
LONG LIVE SIR POSSUM
"Sir Possum, I knight thee"
 
 
The word person starts with the M sound. Ma, ama, am.


Гӯ баръиъс мән воккӏэ М кӏантӏ. Ма, а-ма, ам.


Сә чӏӯйәсы киттәсы. Дыкӏинтӏуъ кӏыриъчч ӏәмә̄л тӏвитиъ виъс ю̄ъсми им ю̄ъс сытӏинтӏинәдычӏрэ̄ пӏайсәш.


This is the last stop. Make sure to take all your belongings with you before leaving the train.
Бэ̄ръ икми якӏтӏәгьэ. ''Мән''. Ә дыкӏтӏуъ кӏыриъчч тӣ рукӏтӏэ̄. Ни ''мәън'', ''мән''.


Sound out the word with me. ''Person''. Be sure to get the Ä right. Not ''meaning'', ''person''.


♖ Рухх
Руктӏэ̄ ӣтӏ
♗ Фӣл
Диагоналэ̄ ӣтӏ
♕ Вәзӣр
Вәзӣрәсы = руххәсы + фӣләсы
♔ Шә̄гь
Къиъттэ̄сы бәч гы̄рэ̄сы
♘ Гьиъса̄н
L-игъ ӣтӏ
♙ Бэ̄дакъ
Ӣтӏрэ̄дэ са̄дэ̄


♖ The rook
Ривалюцыэ̄сы Сәънӏэ̄с гьу артинксы тӏәш фә̄джиъэ̄сы бәшаринӣ ӣттӏ. Мутт гайджэ̄тиъ сәм до̄лэ̄сэ «пиръәфтэ» ттӏанцӏды воркӏтӏ е биврэ̄ хин, мин ю̄ътӏ вит ынкӏэрутив ӣттӏ нидырӯ, вит гайдж ӣттӏ нитӏыпӏтӏ, вит мәнвис карә̄м нибибытӏ, вит әъза̄б психологическ (тӏыриътӏ бы̄ъмэ әъза̄б мә̄ттӣ сәм) киттӏакӏ нинуътӏ, зарар хин бы̄ъминӣ тәъбӣъэ тита̄тӏ. тихнологиэ̄ дэвэлопӏ та̄мынәс та̄мынәсчӏәс вит ттӏанцӏчӏ тӣтӏиъ дуъш. Тәъбәън вит мәнвис карә̄мәд е бивр имәнтӏиъ гьу зарар хин бы̄ъминӣ тәъбӣъэ тӣтӏиъ, якъӣн вит нидырӯм ынкӏэрутивнтиъ гьу әъза̄б психологическ е кӏэнитӏиъ, вит әъза̄б мә̄ттӣ до̄лэ̄сэ «пиръәфтэ» е кӏэнитӏиъкьи.
It moves in straight lines
♗ The bishop
It moves diagonally
♕ The queen
Queen = rook + bishop
♔ The king
The most important piece
♘ The knight
It moves in an L shape
♙ The pawn
It moves forward only


The Industrial Revolution and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race. They have greatly increased the life-expectancy of those of us who live in “advanced” countries, but they have destabilized society, have made life unfulfilling, have subjected human beings to indignities, have led to widespread psychological suffering (in the Third World to physical suffering as well) and have inflicted severe damage on the natural world. The continued development of technology will worsen the situation. It will certainly subject human beings to greater indignities and inflict greater damage on the natural world, it will probably lead to greater social disruption and psychological suffering, and it may lead to increased physical suffering even in “advanced” countries.


Тӏӯъ хвәз званич екӏычӏэ ттӏәлтӏссә, луътфән тырупкӏ ттӏытӏуъуъппыд гьу кӏо̄ш двиъбы̄ътӏуъ. Тӏӯъ кумаг бытӏссә ю̄ътӏ, тырупкӏ ттӏытӏуъуъппыд гьу набирач чилифонистэ тӏо бәвкӏтӏуъ.


If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again. If you need help, hang up and dial your operator.
[[File:Medieval Cats.png|thumb]]
Катуъсы Къарнысинэ Мичинэ:
*гьәълтӏ вис та̄нәнцӏ
*кәлӣсдэ иънәнцӏ
*кӏэнгэ̄с сәрэ̄е иънәнцӏ
*ынкӏэрутивинӣ дуънәнцӏ
Катуъсы нӯъ:
*тәмбәл гьу умәдур
*кә̄фирс
*тәмбәл дуъсыгъ кӏэнгэ̄с сәрэ̄е ӣтӏды


Cats in Middle Ages:
*hard working
*went to church
*walked on hind legs
*contributed to society
Cats now:
*lazy and ungrateful
*atheists
*too lazy to walk on hind legs


Сәлә̄м. Ниминсы мэ̄ Inigo Montoya-әсы. Тӏӯъ пӏыътӏсәр митиъ бӣънтӏ мир, мытӏӣъ сицӏуъ.


Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
[[File:Guimin Landlord.png|thumb]]
Хозяйн Тӏӣтӏә Бӣт Рентӏ Ттӏәлтӏыъндэды Э̄ррэ̄ Пакъинӣ Е Мигьэ Вӣдытӏухъ


Landlord Forced To Raise Rent Due To Thinking Of Bigger Number


Нон Сәнчӏэ̄сы Кӏвӣш Гъарӣбдэ Хин Екӏды
«Ик пӏыланэ̄с тыринтӏ. Тӏӯъ әлма̄с тытӏма?»
«Вә̄тӏә̄дәсы онччё̄м цӏахе! Вә̄тӏә̄дәсы онччё̄м цӏахе! Вә̄тӏә̄дәсы онччё̄м цӏахе!»
«Къӏайлэ̄, иккы гориләсы.»
«Тӏӯъ мәън сәәд имтӏма? Э̄, сә угь?»
«Тӣтӏуъ тәзә̄ъгьар вӣсы кӏәчӏәпӏиси ниминми Luther гьу Emily исинтӏды. Ик кӏадг чӏусы чӏусы нидуътӏ.»
«Кисасы тӏо сәм макароны с сыром-әми га̄йнтӏма бинк?»
«Ми пӏӣрӯъ синтӏытбыд.»
«Нәгнәсы гӯънтӏ гьаш.»
«Тӏви вӣцӏ, ттӏанцӏчӏинэ адуъкӏинэ, ми вӣцӏухъ вӣсы сәрвәрәсы къәптта̄нэ̄м дошмәне гӯънинтӏкьиды, сә двә̄ла кэрпы, ппа̄нәс нэ̄чӏэ... вӣкӏәм я̄вэ̄де?... имчӏәш е е гьандуг, ниыъкӏанцӏ, шипәл, вэ̄, нивире хин, нвәнцӏуъпӏтӏэцы»


Nine Things to Whisper to Complete Strangers
[[File:Guimin Bear.jpg|thumb]]
"I have the plans. Do you have the diamond?"
Сә гӯътӏ
"Salty peanuts! Salty peanuts! Salty peanuts!"
Агь
"Secretly, I am a gorilla"
Сытӏәнцӏ сәтиъ екӏтӏуърэ̄ роспинэ джәрәнинэ
"Does this make sense to you? Like, any of it?"
"Pretend we are turtles named Luther and Emily. I don't care who's who."
"Are your pockets full of macaroni and cheese, too?"
"I arrived by elephant."
"Bread is real."
"You know, under different circumstances, I believe we could have been the owners of rival graveyards, each resorting to increasingly desperate, not to mention questionable, nay, even illegal, means to secure , how shall we say... permanent residents?"


There he is
Bear
His arrival was foretold in ancient murals.


Чӏӯниъ ик 5 такърӣбән йә̄рәм ибринтӏды ик гьар мэ̄тӏръӣ мәс ыъкӏатӏ кӏуэ «ынуъсы кәм рәнгэ̄сы адуъкӏэ̄сы га̄йнтӏ» гьу кӏо «э̄ррэ̄ ала̄гьәс хвәз тәъмнӣ биврисмәс ттӏәлытӏ» гьу диркӏинтӏуъ хин сәсы сәнчӏэ̄сы екӏчӏәш ныроджисы гӯънинтӏ э̄ррэ̄ ми ивӣцӏухъ 3 йә̄рэсигъэ̄ ала̄гьәс пӏа̄ккӏ ынуъмәс тӣтӏды миртӏ тэ̄нтӏцы


when i was around 5 i asked my mom  why "some people were different colors" and she said "because god wanted lots of flavours"  and let me tell you that was the wronf thing to say because for the next 3 years i thought god ate people when they died
[[File:Guimin Floorboards.jpg|thumb]]
БУЪТ ӢТӀ ТЭ̄НТӀ ВИЪПӀЫ КАКМӘСӘРЭ̄ ВИЪСЭ̄
ИК ПӀАЛАВИЦЭ̄С МИТИЪ ТТӀӘЛНИНТӏИНЭ НЫРОДЖЭ̄


THE GROUND TREMBLES WITH MY EVERY STEP
I HAVE INSTALLED MY FLOORBOARDS INCORRECTLY


[[File:Guimin Heroism vs kidneys donated.jpg|thumb]]
къәръәмер - хъэрә̄ ттӯнәс


heroism - kidneys donated
Двә̄ Кӏонтӏорэ̄с Джәрим Тә̄тӏә Несоблюдениэ̄с Нон Запӏравкӏэ̄сэ Minnesota-әш


Two Companies Fined for Violations at Nine Minnesota Gas Stations


Ик ча̄лэш рәгә̄муътиъ тиртӏ
Э̄ ик йәвгъ мычэ̄мтиъ тытӏ ик термопластикә̄ ттӏытӏдэды буъц, гьу ыг мэ̄тӏсәр мәс суӏә̄л тӏәштиъ мэ̄ эхатӏ, ба̄тӏцы гьәмәтӏиъс ттӏытӏдэ буъц, ми якӏтӏәэды кӏо ''«гьәмәтӏинигъ гьу термопластикинигъ зонэ̄сы пӏәжэ̄сы.»''


I have a translation challenge
Ми вӣцӏ тӏӯъ вәд сыттӏыъды висэ̄, мин ю̄ътӏ кьӏӯтӏәсы гӯътӏ тӏӯътӏы дуъсыгъэ̄. Луътфән кьӏа̄тӏигъ синттӏуъ, километырәм пӏә̄въкӏә̄с са̄дэ̄ кӏиъсәд ттӏэнтӏ.
so I have a pair of shoes I'm holding together with hot glue, and my mother probed me about it, saying they're being held together by hope,
to which I said, ''"there's a fine line between hope and hot glue."''


I know you're a good swimmer, but the current is too strong. Please just go across the bridge, it's only a few kilometers from here.


ТӀӮЪ 25ТӀ НУКӀТӀИНЭ ВИЛИКӀ СӘ ПИРИЛӘД ПӀӘЖ ИМЫТӀМА?
ТӀӮЪ МИРТӀ НЭКӀИНТӀИЪ!
ИК ВИТ ТӀВИ МИРТӀ УЪПӀИТӀИЪ. ИК ӢР ТӀВИТИЪ ДЫКӀИТӀИЪ МАЦОРДЭ̄ ГАЙДЖЭ̄С МӘС. ИК ТӀВИ ДЫКӀИТӀИЪГЬЭ. ТӀӮЪ СУЪП НИРИМИТӀИЪ РИМИТӀИЪ. АЛА̄ГЬӘС ПӘРРИКЪ ТӀЭ̄ НИИМИТӀИЪ. МИ ТӀӮЪДЭ ӢТӀ.
DID YOU TAKE A GREY BIKE FROM THESE RAILINGS ON THE NIGHT OF THE 25TH?
YOU ARE GOING TO DIE!
I AM GOING TO KILL YOU. END T REST OF MY LIFE TRACKING YOU DOWN. I WILL FIND YOUYOU WILL NEVER SLEEP AGAIN. GOD WILL NOT SAVE YOU. I AM COMING FOR YOU.


Э̄ ТӀВИ
МӘН КЬЁВ
СЫПАС ИКМИ СИЦӀДЫ 🙂
ИК ТТӀИЛЫТӀ ДЖО̄Ш ХИИИИИИН 🙂
ТӀВИ ДИНДЭ МӘС СИНТТӀ ТАКЭ̄ НАЧЁКЭ̄
МӘ̄ТӀСӘР МӘС ПОПКОР НӘ̄С УПӀИТӀИЪ
ГЬУ ВӘТ ЫМ КИНОМ 12+ ДЫКӀӘНТӀИЪ
ГЬУ ИК ВИТ ТӀВИ СӘ ТТӀИЛИТӀИЪӘД
Э̄РРЭ̄ ТӀӮЪСЫ БӘЧ ДОТТАГЪЫСЫ МӘС
HEY YOU
COOL GUY
THANKS FOR HANGING OUT WITH ME 🙂
I HAD A LOOOOOOT OF FUN 🙂
YOU SHOULD COME TO MY HOUSE FOR A SLEEPOVER
MY MOM WILL MAKE US POPPYCORN
AND LET US WATCH PG-13 MOVIES
AND I'LL LET YOU PICK
BECAUSE YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND


Тӏәс хурхуд ппӏәрӣъ ттытӏ мӣнэ̄ сәрэ̄, гьу ыб гьу свәр двә̄ гьәфтигъ имнинтӏухъ. Мин ю̄ътӏ бишэ̄кӏәм вит бӯр хуй кӏа̄сигъ тӏәш нэкӏытӏчӏ нэ̄чӏэ никӏукӏунтӏгьэыъ нӯъ.


He swallowed a seed last month and then got rain and sunshine for two weeks straight. But doctors still can't figure out how he grew a fucking plant through his skull.
Э̄кь вӣърэ упӏтӏкьи гьу гӯътӏиъ тӏипӏ о̄мныънэ эв. Э̄кь вӣърэ вит нэкӏтӏкьи гьу гӯътӏиъ тӏипӏ мацордйыънэ гӯътӏэ̄с


Build a man a fire and he will be warm for one day. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.


[[File:LotR Days of Christmas.png|thumb]]
сипӏтӏы кӏугвис сә виъс зинтӏды олур,
биккӏ ккэн сә дыкӏинтӏбыдды,
пӏукӏ гьәълкъэ̄с зәреэ̄с сә виъс минтӏдэды,
гьу дыро̄инэ къуърис ллинтӏды бәтт


seven swans to rule them all,
Кӏуън кӏорчымэ̄индэ синтӏытӏ гьу екӏатӏ «ик нугь никӏукӏтӏыъ, ик тӏәмӣ ппёэ̄ упӏитӏиъ.»
six geese to find them,
five golden rings to bring them all,
and in the pear tree to bind them


A dog walked into a tavern and said "I can’t see a thing, I'll open this one."


Былёск Кьә̄вкӏ
Былёск Ты̄ме
Майрам
эстетикэ̄с гьвиләмтиъ
сәсы былисынэ̄сы
ми тэ̄нтӏә э̄нкӏтӏ абдалэ̄. иккы иттӏ емыр гьвиләсы


Blue Glitter
Нәгн, Нәгн; о̄ әъджәб (митиъ).
Smoke Glitter
Нәгн, Нәгн; сәнттӏуърэ̄дэ мэ̄ пӏа̄ккӏ дуътӏ.
Sunset
fish aesthetics
those are lures
I've been fooled. I'm as dumb as a fish


Bread, Bread; oh wonder (of mine).
Bread, Bread; come feed me.


[[File:Guimin this is my brush.png|thumb]]
Сә екксы мәс гӯътӏ:
Сә басысы мәс гӯътӏ:
Сә холсәсы мәс гӯътӏ:


This is my brush:
Дунайәд Волгадэ! ръӯе̄сы двә̄, до̄лэ̄сы эв!
This is my paint:
This is my canvas:


From the Danube to the Volga! - Two rivers, One nation!


Ни, пӏыътӏ-шутӏкӏэ̄сы пӏыътӏ-шутӏкӏэ̄сы ни кӏэнчӏ. Тӏӯъсы мёлкъӏэ̄сы гилтӏэ̄сы шәкәргьӯтӏеэ̄сы га̄йтӏкьи, пӏыътӏ-шутӏкӏэ̄сы га̄йтӏкьи нӯъ лол


Nah, a dad joke is a dad joke no matter what. You could be a pregnant lizard with diabeties, it would still be a dad joke lol
Баркалааа ик гьуъпп гъайбмәс ттӏытӏ! Әсинтӏ мыд гьу та̄нрәыъ гынэчӏ гьу ик гьуъпп гыркисӣ та̄нтӏычӏэ ттӏытӏ!


hiii i love pillows! they're soft and squishy and i love hugging them!


тӏӯъ вирг хин сә о̄мэ тита̄тӏ
э̄ эстроген тытӏуъ! !


youve worked so hard today
Ыг компютэрәс тӏо пӏаникӏ ядрэ̄ дәркӏытӏухъ гьу тынтӏ ю̄ътӏ виъкӏэн. Кьавиш бы̄ътӏуъ би мытӏуъ сә̄нӣэ̄ кәм синтӏычӏрэ̄ тӏо.
here have estrogen! !


Your computer has experienced a kernel panic and had to restart. Press a key or wait a few seconds to continue.


[[File:Guimin water.png|thumb]]
Có rất ngiều nước trong cơ thể tôi. Bạn có muốn uống nó không?


Вәт бивр суълтӏинэ мәс гӯътӏ. Тӏӯъ лоб ытӏинэчӏитиъ тәртӏма?
Сә чӏӯйәсы киттәсы. Дыкӏинтӏуъ кӏыриъчч ӏәмә̄л тӏвитиъ виъс ю̄ъсми им ю̄ъс сытӏинтӏинәдычӏрэ̄ пӏайсәш.


There is a lot of water in my body. Do you want to drink it?
This is the last stop. Make sure to take all your belongings with you before leaving the train.




[[File:Guimin spirals.png|thumb]]
♖ Рухх
тита̄тӏ НЭ̄ЧӏЭ?
Руктӏэ̄ ӣтӏ
ниӣтӏуъпӏтӏэухъды?
♗ Фӣл
сә гъәшш ала̄гьэ бибы̄ътӏ киттэ̄?
Диагоналэ̄ ӣтӏ
ни.
♕ Вәзӣр
сә до̄ттӏ гьәъләзотиъ воркӏтӏ са̄дэ̄
Вәзӣрәсы = руххәсы + фӣләсы
♔ Шә̄гь
Къиъттэ̄сы бәч гы̄рэ̄сы
♘ Гьиъса̄н
L-игъ ӣтӏ
♙ Бэ̄дакъ
Ӣтӏрэ̄дэ са̄дэ̄


HOW has he done it?
♖ The rook
without falling?
It moves in straight lines
has he cheated god at last?
♗ The bishop
no.
It moves diagonally
he has simply befriended the spirals
♕ The queen
Queen = rook + bishop
♔ The king
The most important piece
♘ The knight
It moves in an L shape
♙ The pawn
It moves forward only




[[File:Guimin jellyfish.png|thumb]]
Тӏӯъ хвәз званич екӏычӏэ ттӏәлтӏссә, луътфән тырупкӏ ттӏытӏуъуъппыд гьу кӏо̄ш двиъбы̄ътӏуъ. Тӏӯъ кумаг бытӏссә ю̄ътӏ, тырупкӏ ттӏытӏуъуъппыд гьу набирач чилифонистэ тӏо бәвкӏтӏуъ.
сә тӣтӏыъ нэ̄чӏэ
нииттӏды ппӏэ̄тӏ?
тӏәс виъсмәтиъ вапщэ̄ вӣцӏухъ
нитӣтӏыъ а̄вӣтӏ я̄вэ̄д
? сә нисӣм мэ̄ екӏтӏ
хәъд сәэ тӏэ̄тӏ
то̄къӣф сә ынуъмәс имтӏуъ


how can he do this
If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again. If you need help, hang up and dial your operator.
without drowning?
what on earth is he thinking
he can't hold his breath forever
? this tells me nothing
there is trickery afoot
arrest this man




Нэч джа̄гысинэ бивринэ Канадэ̄с дәркӏтӏәыъ. Мин ю̄ътӏ ик пӏа̄ккӏ тӏәшӣъ нита̄тӏыъ, ни тӏэ̄лерппӏэ 2017әшппӏэ.
Сәлә̄м. Ниминсы мэ̄ Inigo Montoya-әсы. Тӏӯъ пӏыътӏсәр митиъ бӣънтӏ мир, мытӏӣъ сицӏуъ.


Cheese can be found in many areas of Canada. But I am not allowed to eat it, not after the incident of 2017.
Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.




Junior! Тӏви сәэ гӯътӏ! Тӏви айропортэ тӏэ̄тӏ кӏубыд?
Нон Сәнчӏэ̄сы Кӏвӣш Гъарӣбдэ Хин Екӏды
«Ик пӏыланэ̄с тыринтӏ. Тӏӯъ әлма̄с тытӏма?»
«Вә̄тӏә̄дәсы онччё̄м цӏахе! Вә̄тӏә̄дәсы онччё̄м цӏахе! Вә̄тӏә̄дәсы онччё̄м цӏахе!»
«Къӏайлэ̄, иккы гориләсы.»
«Тӏӯъ мәън сәәд имтӏма? Э̄, сә угь?»
«Тӣтӏуъ тәзә̄ъгьар вӣсы кӏәчӏәпӏиси ниминми Luther гьу Emily исинтӏды. Ик кӏадг чӏусы чӏусы нидуътӏ.»
«Кисасы тӏо сәм макароны с сыром-әми га̄йнтӏма бинк?»
«Ми пӏӣрӯъ синтӏытбыд.»
«Нәгнәсы гӯънтӏ гьаш.»
«Тӏви вӣцӏ, ттӏанцӏчӏинэ адуъкӏинэ, ми вӣцӏухъ вӣсы сәрвәрәсы къәптта̄нэ̄м дошмәне гӯънинтӏкьиды, сә двә̄ла кэрпы, ппа̄нәс нэ̄чӏэ... вӣкӏәм я̄вэ̄де?... имчӏәш е е гьандуг, ниыъкӏанцӏ, шипәл, вэ̄, нивире хин, нвәнцӏуъпӏтӏэцы»


Ик игзам рия̄дэ̄тиъ тиритӏиъ жакъ. Ми до̄ләд ӣтӏгьэчӏ тиртӏ ю̄ътӏ.
Nine Things to Whisper to Complete Strangers
"I have the plans. Do you have the diamond?"
"Salty peanuts! Salty peanuts! Salty peanuts!"
"Secretly, I am a gorilla"
"Does this make sense to you? Like, any of it?"
"Pretend we are turtles named Luther and Emily. I don't care who's who."
"Are your pockets full of macaroni and cheese, too?"
"I arrived by elephant."
"Bread is real."
"You know, under different circumstances, I believe we could have been the owners of rival graveyards, each resorting to increasingly desperate, not to mention questionable, nay, even illegal, means to secure , how shall we say... permanent residents?"




[[File:Guimin Plato.png|thumb]]
Чӏӯниъ ик 5 такърӣбән йә̄рәм ибринтӏды ик гьар мэ̄тӏръӣ мәс ыъкӏатӏ кӏуэ «ынуъсы кәм рәнгэ̄сы адуъкӏэ̄сы га̄йнтӏ» гьу кӏо «э̄ррэ̄ ала̄гьәс хвәз тәъмнӣ биврисмәс ттӏәлытӏ» гьу диркӏинтӏуъ хин сәсы сәнчӏэ̄сы екӏчӏәш ныроджисы гӯънинтӏ э̄ррэ̄ ми ивӣцӏухъ 3 йә̄рэсигъэ̄ ала̄гьәс пӏа̄ккӏ ынуъмәс тӣтӏды миртӏ тэ̄нтӏцы
Сопәтэ̄с әфла̄тӯънеэә̄с сәсы гӯътӏ.
Сукъра̄т: эттэ̄л кӏокӏ нипӏиттитиъ
мән итӏэр: виъсм тӏви екӏтӏды гӯътӏ вин гьу гьаш.
Ик 10тӏ «тәъбәън, Сукъра̄т» гӯтӏдэцы мин ю̄ътӏ доттагъ бэтӏ бэтӏ


Platonic dialogues are just like.
when i was around 5 i asked my mom  why "some people were different colors" and she said "because god wanted lots of flavours"  and let me tell you that was the wronf thing to say because for the next 3 years i thought god ate people when they died
Socrates: massive chunk of text
the other guy: everything you say is beautiful and true.
When I'm on my 10th "certainly, Socrates" but bro keeps talking




[[File:Guimin Dawn.jpg|thumb]]
[[File:Guimin Heroism vs kidneys donated.jpg|thumb]]
Пӏыъкчӏиъс мәс сә ботыл дэдыкӏытӏгьэ рика̄тиъ Dawn-итиъ душинэ вә̄лиднә̄м мәс тӏыънтӏды.
къәръәмер - хъэрә̄ ттӯнәс
Гӯ пӏытӏсәр мәс ла̄втӏ суълтӏвӣ әгэ тӏәш тӣчӏэ быъкӏтӏ э̄ррэ̄:
«Гӯътӏссә вис эрчӏ кьӏоргръӣ, гӯътӏды вис эрчӏ мэ̄.»
Да̄ст гьаш.


My wife found this bottle of Dawn dish soap sitting in my parents' shower.
heroism - kidneys donated
Apparently, my dad uses it to wash his entire body because:
"If it's good enough for baby ducks, it's good enough for me."
Absolute legend.




Сә видеос сыпонсәр FishVPN-э тэ̄нтӏә
Ик ча̄лэш рәгә̄муътиъ тиртӏ
FishVPN-әс сакъӏ зылавредисәд гьу гьуъсәрисәд нилобеисәд тӣтӏ, гьу кӏыриъчч ы̄ъйәм тӏвитиъ ыъсинтӏды кӏэл тӣтӏыъ.
Э̄ ик йәвгъ мычэ̄мтиъ тытӏ ик термопластикә̄ ттӏытӏдэды буъц, гьу ыг мэ̄тӏсәр мәс суӏә̄л тӏәштиъ мэ̄ эхатӏ, ба̄тӏцы гьәмәтӏиъс ттӏытӏдэ буъц, ми якӏтӏәэды кӏо ''«гьәмәтӏинигъ гьу термопластикинигъ зонэ̄сы пӏәжэ̄сы.»''
Тӏӯъ шыфыр дэпӏынитиъ митиъ 'the fish queen' тӣтӏыъ 99%әшуъпӏтӏэ иштирәкӣ йә̄реӣ


This video is sponsored by FishVPN
I have a translation challenge
FishVPN protects you from unwanted malware and fishermen, and it can make sure your eggs are safe.
so I have a pair of shoes I'm holding together with hot glue, and my mother probed me about it, saying they're being held together by hope,
You can use my discount code 'the fish queen' for 99% off on a yearly subscription
to which I said, ''"there's a fine line between hope and hot glue."''




[[File:Guimin battery.jpg|thumb]]
ТӀӮЪ 25ТӀ НУКӀТӀИНЭ ВИЛИКӀ СӘ ПИРИЛӘД ПӀӘЖ ИМЫТӀМА?
Гьар ынкӏэрутивинӣ Германиеэ итинэнтӏчӏәш 1933инигъ гьу 1945инигъ мӣ ыъкӏтӏуъ угьэ̄
ТӀӮЪ МИРТӀ НЭКӀИНТӀИЪ!
Гьар НАСАэ кӏуэ уълӯчӏа̄сәрыс тӏэ̄тиъ иминтӏды мӣ ыъкӏтӏуъ угьэ̄
ИК ВИТ ТӀВИ МИРТӀ УЪПӀИТӀИЪ. ИК ӢР ТӀВИТИЪ ДЫКӀИТӀИЪ МАЦОРДЭ̄ ГАЙДЖЭ̄С МӘС. ИК ТӀВИ ДЫКӀИТӀИЪГЬЭ. ТӀӮЪ СУЪП НИРИМИТӀИЪ РИМИТӀИЪ. АЛА̄ГЬӘС ПӘРРИКЪ ТӀЭ̄ НИИМИТӀИЪ. МИ ТӀӮЪДЭ ӢТӀ.
Мӣ сицӏуъ угьэ̄ гӯъттӏ тӣды 1%ми гайджэ̄с батарее̄с эве


Never ask a German company what they did between 1933 and 1945
DID YOU TAKE A GREY BIKE FROM THESE RAILINGS ON THE NIGHT OF THE 25TH?
Never ask NASA where they got their scientists
YOU ARE GOING TO DIE!
Never sit down to take a shit with only 1% battery life
I AM GOING TO KILL YOU. END T REST OF MY LIFE TRACKING YOU DOWN. I WILL FIND YOUYOU WILL NEVER SLEEP AGAIN. GOD WILL NOT SAVE YOU. I AM COMING FOR YOU.




Гӯътӏ гьәссә̄р
Тӏәс хурхуд ппӏәрӣъ ттытӏ мӣнэ̄ сәрэ̄, гьу ыб гьу свәр двә̄ гьәфтигъ имнинтӏухъ. Мин ю̄ътӏ бишэ̄кӏәм вит бӯр хуй кӏа̄сигъ тӏәш нэкӏытӏчӏ нэ̄чӏэ никӏукӏунтӏгьэыъ нӯъ.
Ынвис виъсэс куръ уъллэ̄мәс вӣмтӏды кӏо̄ә̄с уъпӏрә такэ̄
Цә̄й кӏо̄исӣ ттәнцӏ


Its normal
He swallowed a seed last month and then got rain and sunshine for two weeks straight. But doctors still can't figure out how he grew a fucking plant through his skull.
All people who hate foreskins should be skinned
To protect the skin




Lightning McQueen-әсы твинксы
[[File:LotR Days of Christmas.png|thumb]]
Ныроджер гьәссә̄р! Тӏәсы ма̄шӣнэ̄сы гьашэ̄
сипӏтӏы кӏугвис сә виъс зинтӏды олур,
биккӏ ккэн сә дыкӏинтӏбыдды,
пӏукӏ гьәълкъэ̄с зәреэ̄с сә виъс минтӏдэды,
гьу дыро̄инэ къуърис ллинтӏды бәтт


Lightning McQueen in a twink
seven swans to rule them all,
Common misconception! He's actually a car
six geese to find them,
five golden rings to bring them all,
and in the pear tree to bind them




ЭВМИМИ FIREBOY & WATERGIRL ТӢДЫ МО̄Н КӀУКӀТӀГЬЭППӀИГЪ.
Былёск Кьә̄вкӏ
ИК FIREBOY ТЭ̄НТӀ МО̄Н ГЬӘССӘ̄РЭ̄ МИН Ю̄ЪТӀ МИ ГӮЪТӀЫЪ МАРИН
Былёск Ты̄ме
Майрам
эстетикэ̄с гьвиләмтиъ
сәсы былисынэ̄сы
ми тэ̄нтӏә э̄нкӏтӏ абдалэ̄. иккы иттӏ емыр гьвиләсы


LOOKING FOR SOMEONE TO PLAY FIREBOY & WATERGIRL WITH.
Blue Glitter
I USUALLY PLAY FIREBOY BUT I CAN BE FLEXIBLE
Smoke Glitter
Sunset
fish aesthetics
those are lures
I've been fooled. I'm as dumb as a fish




[[File:Guimin yeet Lynda.jpg|thumb]]
[[File:Guimin this is my brush.png|thumb]]
Lynda әдэхэтӏиъма? Сә тӣчӏ нипӏәтыътӏәыъ. Пилотыргэс Lynda айропланәд эхэтӏиъ пӏэкк тӣчӏигъэ̄. Мӣ ппӏыддиркӏтӏуъгьэ, зәм тӏвитиъ быдсытӏәнцӏ нибӣътӏә.
Сә екксы мәс гӯътӏ:
Lynda әдэхтӏуъ · 262,754.30₽
Сә басысы мәс гӯътӏ:
Lynda-э̄ ыъханцӏ рэ̄дэттӏилчӏ тӏвитиъ ыъндэттитӏиъыъ. Аппэтэ̄с Дәркӏинтӏуъ
Сә холсәсы мәс гӯътӏ:


Ready to eject Lynda? This action cannot be undone. Flight attendants will eject Lynda from the plane mid-flight. Don't worry, your arrival time will not be impacted.
This is my brush:
Eject Lynda · $2,703.50
This is my paint:
Lynda will be able to counter your ejection bid. View Terms
This is my canvas:




агьәсы банкэ имтӏ: кисәрыс ыъндэттӏәлинтӏуъ
Ни, пӏыътӏ-шутӏкӏэ̄сы пӏыътӏ-шутӏкӏэ̄сы ни кӏэнчӏ. Тӏӯъсы мёлкъӏэ̄сы гилтӏэ̄сы шәкәргьӯтӏеэ̄сы га̄йтӏкьи, пӏыътӏ-шутӏкӏэ̄сы га̄йтӏкьи нӯъ лол
сәърра̄фсы: *кисәрыс ыъндэттӏәлинтӏ*
агьәсы: *вэ̄тӏәсы* тӏви нэкӏытӏ хин мигъ нэ̄чӏэ


bear robbing a bank: stick em up
Nah, a dad joke is a dad joke no matter what. You could be a pregnant lizard with diabeties, it would still be a dad joke lol
teller: *raises hands*
bear: *nervous* how'd you get so big




Ни Кӏо̄ Ни Рӯъгь Ни Хидым
тӏӯъ вирг хин сә о̄мэ тита̄тӏ
Вӣ гьәъкъ хидым кӏафэсисәд әдмәнцӏ тиртӏ
э̄ эстроген тытӏуъ! !
Гъӯлыс гьу аккю̄тәм сә милкэ гӯърә мәъссӯр


No Skin No Soul No Service
youve worked so hard today
We reserve the right to refuse service to skeletons
here have estrogen! !
No ghouls or wraiths allowed on this property




НОЙ ДЖӘРӘН ЛӘВЪГЬ ДИРКӀТӀӘГЬЭ, ВӘТ ТӀӘМ НӘККӀ МИЪРРӢЪ БӢЪНТӀДЫ ДИРКӀИТӀИЪКЬИ
[[File:Guimin water.png|thumb]]
(Шумэреәсы гьу вӣ вә̄нд угьмисӣ мин ю̄ътӏ баръӣъ «ё» нидәркӏтӏыъ)
Có rất ngiều nước trong cơ thể tôi. Bạn có muốn uống nó không?


NEW ANCIENT TABLET DISCOVERED, MAY REVEAL WHAT DESTROYED EGYPT
Вәт бивр суълтӏинэ мәс гӯътӏ. Тӏӯъ лоб ытӏинэчӏитиъ тәртӏма?
(It's Sumerian and we cannot read any of it except a word for "barley")


There is a lot of water in my body. Do you want to drink it?


Ик айрач тӣды сайтӣ ӣхтӏппӏтӏэ. Ик ниъз хин е әъкье 400 табис 32 пәнджәрэ̄сэ быравзырис тиргьэчӏитиъ тӣтӏиъ компютэр митиъ индэбӣътӏиъчӏбыд гьу ик гӯътӏиъыъ муъкӏтӏ киттэ̄.


I refuse to bookmark a website. I will simply use the far more logical system of keeping 400 tabs open on 32 browser windows until my computer crashes and I can finally be free.
[[File:Guimin spirals.png|thumb]]
 
тита̄тӏ НЭ̄ЧӏЭ?
 
ниӣтӏуъпӏтӏэухъды?
Са̄гьиърыргэ̄сы Нуъкис Япониеэ̄сы әвӣтиъ виъеэ̄мтиъ бәч миртӏеэ̄мтиъ. Гадэс тӏәшэ̄с дәъгът ръаме 0.000000013 фут-фунтәмтиъ ттӏилтӏ, гьу быттӏиъс быритеэ̄ тӏәшэ̄с мэс ка̄гъитиъ лук угь пӏы инигъбӣътӏыъ, мэс упӏтӏәссә ыптӏ пӏӯвэ̄.
сә гъәшш ала̄гьэ бибы̄ътӏ киттэ̄?
ни.
сә до̄ттӏ гьәъләзотиъ воркӏтӏ са̄дэ̄


The Japanese Snow Fairy is one of the deadliest predatory birds. Its claws exude a terrifying 0.000000013 foot pounds of pressure, and its razor sharp beak can puncture nearly any light paper bag, if the bag is wetted first.
HOW has he done it?
without falling?
has he cheated god at last?
no.
he has simply befriended the spirals




Ви Пепси-кола ттытӏ пӏәччӏ ми нига̄йтӏ кӏыриъчч кӏуэ бырэджисы гьвинабисы дуъсыгъэ̄ гӯъдымай мин ю̄ътӏ ми виъцӏухъ ви со̄с сое̄тиъ гьәссә̄р ттитӏиъ двитӏӣъэ̄ ик Кока-кола нитыритӏиъссә.
[[File:Guimin jellyfish.png|thumb]]
сә тӣтӏыъ нэ̄чӏэ
нииттӏды ппӏэ̄тӏ?
тӏәс виъсмәтиъ вапщэ̄ вӣцӏухъ
нитӣтӏыъ а̄вӣтӏ я̄вэ̄д
? сә нисӣм мэ̄ екӏтӏ
хәъд сәэ тӏэ̄тӏ
то̄къӣф сә ынуъмәс имтӏуъ


Угь Кока-кола би Пепси-кола сә тарӣфинэ нигӯътӏ.
how can he do this
without drowning?
what on earth is he thinking
he can't hold his breath forever
? this tells me nothing
there is trickery afoot
arrest this man


We used Pepsi so I'm not sure if that was why it was a bit too sweet but I think we will use regular soy sauce next time if I don't have a Coke.


There isn't any Coke or Pepsi in this recipe.
Нэч джа̄гысинэ бивринэ Канадэ̄с дәркӏтӏәыъ. Мин ю̄ътӏ ик пӏа̄ккӏ тӏәшӣъ нита̄тӏыъ, ни тӏэ̄лерппӏэ 2017әшппӏэ.


Cheese can be found in many areas of Canada. But I am not allowed to eat it, not after the incident of 2017.


Ик кӏо̄ш гъарӣбэ̄ми шечэ бы̄ътӏ ыъкӏтӏ нә̄ъсы очиричэ бакаләе екӏэнтӏчӏәсы буъц. Уъм кәм гъарӣбэ̄ми шечэ екӏэнтӏ ю̄ъссы ёгъм тӏокӏитиъ мӯн биртӏ виъсэ̄


I try to talk to strangers on the internet like we are chatting in line at the grocery store together. Some of you talk to strangers on the internet like you are having active road rage at all times
Junior! Тӏви сәэ гӯътӏ! Тӏви айропортэ тӏэ̄тӏ кӏубыд?


Ик игзам рия̄дэ̄тиъ тиритӏиъ жакъ. Ми до̄ләд ӣтӏгьэчӏ тиртӏ ю̄ътӏ.


[[File:Guimin kitten mischief.jpg|thumb]]
Гьәфтәм 5-6
''Эссәм Сӯърытуъ: Vassilis Flickr-игъ''
Гьәфтәсы 5 гьу 6 кӏэнчӏәсы гьашисы бәлэ̄с катыргос.


Weeks 5-6
[[File:Guimin Plato.png|thumb]]
''Image Credit: Vassilis via Flickr''
Сопәтэ̄с әфла̄тӯънеэә̄с сәсы гӯътӏ.
Weeks 5 and 6 are the true beginnings of kitten mischief.
Сукъра̄т: эттэ̄л кӏокӏ нипӏиттитиъ
мән итӏэр: виъсм тӏви екӏтӏды гӯътӏ вин гьу гьаш.
Ик 10тӏ «тәъбәън, Сукъра̄т» гӯтӏдэцы мин ю̄ътӏ доттагъ бэтӏ бэтӏ


Platonic dialogues are just like.
Socrates: massive chunk of text
the other guy: everything you say is beautiful and true.
When I'm on my 10th "certainly, Socrates" but bro keeps talking


КУРЪ. ИК УЪМ ЕКӀАНТӀИЪ ИК КУРЪ ВӘ̄С НЭКӀИНТӀ ЧӀӮ ЧӀӮНИЪӘД МИ КӀАНТӀ ГӮЪ ГАЙДЖЕ. 387,44 МИЛЁН МИЛЭ̄СЫ ЦЭПЁ̄М ГЬӘЪРФЕЭ̄М НИЧӀӘ̄СИНЭ ТӀИНВӘ̄СИНЭ ВАФЛИЭ̄СЫ ТӀЭ̄ССЫ СӘМБИНКЕР МИТИЪ ТТӀИЛТӀ БИНК. БЭ̄РЪ КУРЪ НАНОАНГСТРЕМЭ УГЬ ТӀӘШӢЪ КӀЫТӀЫС МИЛЁНЫС МИЛЭ̄С БӘ̄ЙНТӀССӘ ПӀИНӘТТӀ СӘМЭ̄СЫ ЭВ БИЛЁНТӀ КУРЪИС НИӢТТӀКЬИ СӘ МИ ӀИНСӘ̄НМӘС ТЫТӀ ТӀӘ̄МЭ МИКРО-СӘ̄НӢЭ. ВӘ̄С. КУРЪ. КУРЪ.


HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE. THERE ARE 387.44 MILLION MILES OF PRINTED CIRCUITS IN WAFER THIN LAYERS THAT FILL MY COMPLEX. IF THE WORD HATE WAS ENGRAVED ON EACH NANOANGSTROM OF THOSE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF MILES IT WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE ONE-BILLIONTH OF THE HATE I FEEL FOR HUMANS AT THIS MICRO-INSTANT. FOR YOU. HATE. HATE.
[[File:Guimin Dawn.jpg|thumb]]
Пӏыъкчӏиъс мәс сә ботыл дэдыкӏытӏгьэ рика̄тиъ Dawn-итиъ душинэ вә̄лиднә̄м мәс тӏыънтӏды.
Гӯ пӏытӏсәр мәс ла̄втӏ суълтӏвӣ әгэ тӏәш тӣчӏэ быъкӏтӏ э̄ррэ̄:
«Гӯътӏссә вис эрчӏ кьӏоргръӣ, гӯътӏды вис эрчӏ мэ̄.»
Да̄ст гьаш.


My wife found this bottle of Dawn dish soap sitting in my parents' shower.
Apparently, my dad uses it to wash his entire body because:
"If it's good enough for baby ducks, it's good enough for me."
Absolute legend.


МӢ Сигар инэәмтӏуъ
Мӣ екӏтӏуъ Фыранцие


NO Smoking
Сә видеос сыпонсәр FishVPN-э тэ̄нтӏә
Don't speak French
FishVPN-әс сакъӏ зылавредисәд гьу гьуъсәрисәд нилобеисәд тӣтӏ, гьу кӏыриъчч ы̄ъйәм тӏвитиъ ыъсинтӏды кӏэл тӣтӏыъ.
Тӏӯъ шыфыр дэпӏынитиъ митиъ 'the fish queen' тӣтӏыъ 99%әшуъпӏтӏэ иштирәкӣ йә̄реӣ


This video is sponsored by FishVPN
FishVPN protects you from unwanted malware and fishermen, and it can make sure your eggs are safe.
You can use my discount code 'the fish queen' for 99% off on a yearly subscription


Кӏуэ дэрәшшэ̄с го̄да̄лимбыд э̄тӏ виъсэ̄?
10 Суӏә̄лысы Бәч Висуъсы УЪЛӮИС НИБЫДЫЪКӀЭНТӏЫЪДЫ НӮЪ


Why do metors always land in craters?
[[File:Guimin battery.jpg|thumb]]
Top 10 Questions SCIENCE STILL CAN'T ANSWER
Гьар ынкӏэрутивинӣ Германиеэ итинэнтӏчӏәш 1933инигъ гьу 1945инигъ мӣ ыъкӏтӏуъ угьэ̄
Гьар НАСАэ кӏуэ уълӯчӏа̄сәрыс тӏэ̄тиъ иминтӏды мӣ ыъкӏтӏуъ угьэ̄
Мӣ сицӏуъ угьэ̄ гӯъттӏ тӣды 1%ми гайджэ̄с батарее̄с эве


Never ask a German company what they did between 1933 and 1945
Never ask NASA where they got their scientists
Never sit down to take a shit with only 1% battery life


Бэ̄ръ вис ынуъмәс тӏуъччӏәмәс квӣрәмәс тӏэ̄мәс хуйм нитӣнтӏ. Вирг би мэкӏтӏэб тыътӏ гьу диндэ синтӏинтӏ мусәлсәлэ̄с якӏэнтӏды. Гӯънтӏцы милъ


Shoutout to boring queer people who don't do shit. Just go to work or school and then come home to watch shows. While gay
Гӯътӏ гьәссә̄р
Ынвис виъсэс куръ уъллэ̄мәс вӣмтӏды кӏо̄ә̄с уъпӏрә такэ̄
Цә̄й кӏо̄исӣ ттәнцӏ


Its normal
All people who hate foreskins should be skinned
To protect the skin


Гӯн мэ̄тӏириндэ сәнттӏ. Тӏә̄м вӣър гьу агь диркӏтӏзәм. Вӣърәсы тортәсы гӯътӏ гьашэ̄. Агьәс двә̄ вэләм инэтиринтӏ. Вэлэс хвәз вӣдчӏитиъ тӏӯъ гьуъпп тӏэ̄мәс ттӏытӏчӏәш тӏәссы кӏумиъсы гӯътӏссәды ттӏәлтӏ


A woman goes into the woods. She encounters a man and a bear. The man is actually cake. The bear has two wolves inside it. The wolves want to know if you would love them if they were a worm
Lightning McQueen-әсы твинксы
Ныроджер гьәссә̄р! Тӏәсы ма̄шӣнэ̄сы гьашэ̄


Lightning McQueen in a twink
Common misconception! He's actually a car


Моцартәсы 5э джикабырис 1791: о̄, пирогиъсы быъджиъсы нойәсы? Мэ̄ са̄дэ̄? [ИНДЭСИНТТӀ, КАМИРА НӢШДЭ ТТЫМДЭ ТӀӘД «ФАБРИКӀ ПИРОГИЪТИЪ» ЫЪКӀТӀДЫ СӘНТТӀ] [НӢШ СЫТТӀУХЪУЪПӀТӀЭ, УЪТ НӢШ ТӀӘД «Дә̄м миртӏиътиъ Моцартитәш» ЫЪКӀТӀДЫ ККӀУТӀӘ]


Mozart on December 5th, 1791: oh wow, a freshly baked pie? Just for me? [HE WALKS INSIDE, CAMERA PANS TO SIGN ON THE BUILDING THAT READS "PIE FACTORY"] [SIGN FALLS OFF, REVEALING A SIGN THAT READS "Mozart death house"]
ЭВМИМИ FIREBOY & WATERGIRL ТӢДЫ МО̄Н КӀУКӀТӀГЬЭППӀИГЪ.
ИК FIREBOY ТЭ̄НТӀ МО̄Н ГЬӘССӘ̄РЭ̄ МИН Ю̄ЪТӀ МИ ГӮЪТӀЫЪ МАРИН


LOOKING FOR SOMEONE TO PLAY FIREBOY & WATERGIRL WITH.
I USUALLY PLAY FIREBOY BUT I CAN BE FLEXIBLE


Нуфӯс иллинытиъ опӏтӏә руктӏ вэләм гьӣкьӏиндэ ӣхды мо̄ч. Мәссәлэ̄с виъсэ̄с опӏтӏә руктӏ сәэ̄ такэ̄. Тәднӣс дуъсыгъ? Вэләм фабрикӏэ̄синдэ ӣхэнтӏуъ мо̄ч. Конгресс ниттӏилтӏ джо̄ш? Вэләм. Хвәз гӯътӏчӏитиъ гыро̄ е пӏә̄въкӏ ттӏытӏма? Руктӏәсы, вэләм.


Deer population is controlled by releasing wolves into an area. All problems should be solved that way. Too much pollution? Release wolves in factories. Dislike Congress? Wolves. Wanna lose weight? That's right, wolves.
[[File:Guimin yeet Lynda.jpg|thumb]]
Lynda әдэхэтӏиъма? Сә тӣчӏ нипӏәтыътӏәыъ. Пилотыргэс Lynda айропланәд эхэтӏиъ пӏэкк тӣчӏигъэ̄. Мӣ ппӏыддиркӏтӏуъгьэ, зәм тӏвитиъ быдсытӏәнцӏ нибӣътӏә.
Lynda әдэхтӏуъ · 262,754.30₽
Lynda-э̄ ыъханцӏ рэ̄дэттӏилчӏ тӏвитиъ ыъндэттитӏиъыъ. Аппэтэ̄с Дәркӏинтӏуъ


Ready to eject Lynda? This action cannot be undone. Flight attendants will eject Lynda from the plane mid-flight. Don't worry, your arrival time will not be impacted.
Eject Lynda · $2,703.50
Lynda will be able to counter your ejection bid. View Terms


Ик гьуъпп пӏа̄ккӏӣъ Быританиеисӣ ттӏилтӏ. Кӏартӏофиләсы әгәсы нэчэ̄ми нитӏэ̄нэ̄ми гьу луппуъми быъджими. Гьу тӏәмс очирич тӏәмӣ сә̄ъэ̄сигъ вәркӏтӏ.


Тӏәд пӏӯв сәнчӏэ̄сы сә кӏвә̄н пӏа̄ккӏӣъ упӏтӏкьиды ӏинсә̄н акӏәнцӏчӏппӏэ дыкӏтӏә.
агьәсы банкэ имтӏ: кисәрыс ыъндэттӏәлинтӏуъ
сәърра̄фсы: *кисәрыс ыъндэттӏәлинтӏ*
агьәсы: *вэ̄тӏәсы* тӏви нэкӏытӏ хин мигъ нэ̄чӏэ


I love British food. A whole potato topped with unmelted cheese and baked beans. And they line up for hours for it.
bear robbing a bank: stick em up
teller: *raises hands*
bear: *nervous* how'd you get so big


This looks like the first thing a dog would make to eat after turning into a human.


Ни Кӏо̄ Ни Рӯъгь Ни Хидым
Вӣ гьәъкъ хидым кӏафэсисәд әдмәнцӏ тиртӏ
Гъӯлыс гьу аккю̄тәм сә милкэ гӯърә мәъссӯр
No Skin No Soul No Service
We reserve the right to refuse service to skeletons
No ghouls or wraiths allowed on this property


Иккы апӏтӏәсы сәтиъ ттӏанцӏчӏитиъ гӯътӏ. Эв ракъәд ми Даничӏа̄сысы бэ̄тӏә, мин ю̄ътӏ ракъәд итӏэрәд ик инсидж тӏәмӣ мәънинӣ биртӏ.
I'm conflicted about this situation. On the one hand I'm being called a Dane, but on the other I do agree with the sentiment here.


НОЙ ДЖӘРӘН ЛӘВЪГЬ ДИРКӀТӀӘГЬЭ, ВӘТ ТӀӘМ НӘККӀ МИЪРРӢЪ БӢЪНТӀДЫ ДИРКӀИТӀИЪКЬИ
(Шумэреәсы гьу вӣ вә̄нд угьмисӣ мин ю̄ътӏ баръӣъ «ё» нидәркӏтӏыъ)


Кӏорчымэ, вӣърәс вит ми ся̄гь нәмә̄тиъ тты̄нәскьиитиъ тӏотӏӣъ тӏәш диркӏытӏ
NEW ANCIENT TABLET DISCOVERED, MAY REVEAL WHAT DESTROYED EGYPT
(It's Sumerian and we cannot read any of it except a word for "barley")


мигъмӯъкьӏ
гӯъттӏ/гӯъттӏ/гӯъттӏ
рацён кӏумӣтиъ
баба сылага
сиг гӯъттӏитиъ
пэгинг
гьӯтӏ бриан
ыптӏмә̄с ы̄ъйеәм
лъэ̄гь мэракӏе
вӣър варэ̄тиъ/варвӣър
са̄гьиър
талун икӏитиъ
къадиъб мычэ̄тиъ
пӏыътӏсәр миръә̄ъдтиъ
пӏыътӏсәр сорчиритиъ


At the pub, a guy has shown me his list of potential names for his band
Ик айрач тӣды сайтӣ ӣхтӏппӏтӏэ. Ик ниъз хин е әъкье 400 табис 32 пәнджәрэ̄сэ быравзырис тиргьэчӏитиъ тӣтӏиъ компютэр митиъ индэбӣътӏиъчӏбыд гьу ик гӯътӏиъыъ муъкӏтӏ киттэ̄.


megapiss
I refuse to bookmark a website. I will simply use the far more logical system of keeping 400 tabs open on 32 browser windows until my computer crashes and I can finally be free.
shit/shit/shit
diet of worms
baba slaga
shit cig
pegging
brian disease
eggy wets
curious eel
hat man/hatman
hag
horse funeral
shoe penis
bathroom dad
toilet dad




Тӏви сәэ тӏэ̄тӏссә...
Са̄гьиърыргэ̄сы Нуъкис Япониеэ̄сы әвӣтиъ виъеэ̄мтиъ бәч миртӏеэ̄мтиъ. Гадэс тӏәшэ̄с дәъгът ръаме 0.000000013 фут-фунтәмтиъ ттӏилтӏ, гьу быттӏиъс быритеэ̄ тӏәшэ̄с мэс ка̄гъитиъ лук угь пӏы инигъбӣътӏыъ, мэс упӏтӏәссә ыптӏ пӏӯвэ̄.
ТӀӮЪ ГОЛӮЛ ЭХТӀУЪКЬИ!
НЭ̄ЧӀЭ?
Орангутанэс тофәнг экспонатинэ тӏәшә̄м бытӏ
КӀУЭ?
кьӏачӏ


If you're standing here...
The Japanese Snow Fairy is one of the deadliest predatory birds. Its claws exude a terrifying 0.000000013 foot pounds of pressure, and its razor sharp beak can puncture nearly any light paper bag, if the bag is wetted first.
YOU MIGHT GET SHOT!
HOW?
The orangutans have a gun in their exhibit
WHY?
funny




Вӣърәс растафариеәс савнинэ ми ибэ̄тӏ ӏуйрэ̄ ик сӣ милиътӏ выкӏтӏ такэ̄. Кӏу «Угьмәс вин бӣнисӣ выкӏтӏыъ». Ик нотӏ сытӏытӏ, имды джитт. чӏигьчӏәсы 10 сә̄нӣэ̄м, ттым културист Полше энкъӏаминэ инигъекӏатӏ: «тӏӯъ бӣн е мигъ ю̄ътӏ»
Ви Пепси-кола ттытӏ пӏәччӏ ми нига̄йтӏ кӏыриъчч кӏуэ бырэджисы гьвинабисы дуъсыгъэ̄ гӯъдымай мин ю̄ътӏ ми виъцӏухъ ви со̄с сое̄тиъ гьәссә̄р ттитӏиъ двитӏӣъэ̄ ик Кока-кола нитыритӏиъссә.


Rastafarian guy in the sauna this morning was telling me I should be making my own honey. "Anyone can buy a bee", he said. I nodded, taking it to heart. There was a 10 second pause, after which a Polish bodybuilder in the corner interjected: "you need more bee"
Угь Кока-кола би Пепси-кола сә тарӣфинэ нигӯътӏ.


We used Pepsi so I'm not sure if that was why it was a bit too sweet but I think we will use regular soy sauce next time if I don't have a Coke.


Ев 20 тәъсарруфсы ӏинсә̄нә̄м бәч кирмиънәсы мәс ми екӏтӏды сә чӏӯниъ Сәнчӏэ̄ во̄ккӏ тә̄тӏ ттым ӏинсә̄нс пӏыйс во̄ккӏ тэтӏиъ тэтӏиъ далгынэ̄. Баппаккыргэ̄сы чӏиррәкӏими
There isn't any Coke or Pepsi in this recipe.


One of my top 20 favourite human behaviours I see around is when an Object makes a sound and then a nearby human will absentmindedly imitate the sound. Parakeet coded


Ик кӏо̄ш гъарӣбэ̄ми шечэ бы̄ътӏ ыъкӏтӏ нә̄ъсы очиричэ бакаләе екӏэнтӏчӏәсы буъц. Уъм кәм гъарӣбэ̄ми шечэ екӏэнтӏ ю̄ъссы ёгъм тӏокӏитиъ мӯн биртӏ виъсэ̄


Ми муъцӏмисәс ттӏилтӏә бинк чӏӯниъ ик нӣш «гӣнттәсы сәинэ» йыъктӏ ма̄шӣнэ мәсрэ̄ ыъкӏтӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ дуъттӏо̄мәс твӣ мэ̄ бә̄йтӏ ми ма̄шӣнэ̄сы мафәсы диркӏцы. Итӏэрэ̄ ми диркӏцы икӏ гӣнттэ бәвкӏтӏә ик шуӏӯърыс нигьэмэ̄с тирды чӏиъгьинтӏ
I try to talk to strangers on the internet like we are chatting in line at the grocery store together. Some of you talk to strangers on the internet like you are having active road rage at all times


I'm filled with joy when I see the "baby on board" sign attached to the car in front of mine, but sadness washes over me when I realize the car is a hearse. Only when I notice that it's being driven by a baby do I begin to have mixed feelings


[[File:Guimin kitten mischief.jpg|thumb]]
Гьәфтәм 5-6
''Эссәм Сӯърытуъ: Vassilis Flickr-игъ''
Гьәфтәсы 5 гьу 6 кӏэнчӏәсы гьашисы бәлэ̄с катыргос.
Weeks 5-6
''Image Credit: Vassilis via Flickr''
Weeks 5 and 6 are the true beginnings of kitten mischief.


Әърәбеәсы къавлсы. Нибидисы, ик дык әърәбе нивӣцӏ пӏәччӏ ик кӏу екӏды нивӣцӏ.


There is an Arabic saying. Unfortunately, I do not know Arabic пӏәччӏ I don't know what it says.
КУРЪ. ИК УЪМ ЕКӀАНТӀИЪ ИК КУРЪ ВӘ̄С НЭКӀИНТӀ ЧӀӮ ЧӀӮНИЪӘД МИ КӀАНТӀ ГӮЪ ГАЙДЖЕ. 387,44 МИЛЁН МИЛЭ̄СЫ ЦЭПЁ̄М ГЬӘЪРФЕЭ̄М НИЧӀӘ̄СИНЭ ТӀИНВӘ̄СИНЭ ВАФЛИЭ̄СЫ ТӀЭ̄ССЫ СӘМБИНКЕР МИТИЪ ТТӀИЛТӀ БИНК. БЭ̄РЪ КУРЪ НАНОАНГСТРЕМЭ УГЬ ТӀӘШӢЪ КӀЫТӀЫС МИЛЁНЫС МИЛЭ̄С БӘ̄ЙНТӀССӘ ПӀИНӘТТӀ СӘМЭ̄СЫ ЭВ БИЛЁНТӀ КУРЪИС НИӢТТӀКЬИ СӘ МИ ӀИНСӘ̄НМӘС ТЫТӀ ТӀӘ̄МЭ МИКРО-СӘ̄НӢЭ. ВӘ̄С. КУРЪ. КУРЪ.


HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE. THERE ARE 387.44 MILLION MILES OF PRINTED CIRCUITS IN WAFER THIN LAYERS THAT FILL MY COMPLEX. IF THE WORD HATE WAS ENGRAVED ON EACH NANOANGSTROM OF THOSE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF MILES IT WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE ONE-BILLIONTH OF THE HATE I FEEL FOR HUMANS AT THIS MICRO-INSTANT. FOR YOU. HATE. HATE.


Виликӏчӏа̄сәр виъсәс шорт сәтиъ имитӏиъкьи руън пӏәччӏ эв нук тӣтӏ кӏэнчӏ. Пӏиджчӏа̄сәр виъс вит расиӣъ кортӏӣъ нэкӏитӏиъкьи кӏәл. Ма̄шӣнэ̄ виъсэ̄ нәккӏ икӏвәсыънигъ виъсәсыънигъ синтӏцы бӣътӏиъкьи. Ник матӏацыкьчӏа̄сәртиъ виъс тәъла̄къми бәч къӏәъгьәми чӏәгьитӏиъкьи. Автобусс виъсәс уъртӏ ракъигъ сәнтӏитӏиъкьи гьу пӏайс виъс релсэсәд синтӏитӏиъкьи. Электросамакӏатӏс пырограмэ̄с нәджә̄гь гӯътӏиъкьи киттэ̄.


May every cyclist rip his shorts so that one ball hangs out. May every pedestrian be belamed by painful gout. May every car be totaled running over every horse. May every biker marriage end in bitterest divorce. May every bus flip over and may every train derail. May the app-based electronic scooter finally prevail.
МӢ Сигар инэәмтӏуъ
Мӣ екӏтӏуъ Фыранцие


NO Smoking
Don't speak French


Сигарэтӏэ̄с санджа̄бэ̄сы га̄йнтӏ.
Нийәме̄сы әгэ тӏви эвм гипӏсәриндэ тӏо ттӏилдыбыд гьу гьудж кӏэндыбыд.
МӢ СИГАР ИНЕӘМТӀУЪ


Cigarettes are like squirrels.
Кӏуэ дэрәшшэ̄с го̄да̄лимбыд э̄тӏ виъсэ̄?
They are perfectly harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.
10 Суӏә̄лысы Бәч Висуъсы УЪЛӮИС НИБЫДЫЪКӀЭНТӏЫЪДЫ НӮЪ
NO SMOKING
 
Why do metors always land in craters?
Top 10 Questions SCIENCE STILL CAN'T ANSWER




сәлә̄м, иккы пыриютӏчӏа̄сысы къарнәд вит екӏтӏ екӏбыдчӏэш америкеәсәд. ик американо ӣъсәми сә гьӣкьӏинэ имтӏкьи кӏуэ
Бэ̄ръ вис ынуъмәс тӏуъччӏәмәс квӣрәмәс тӏэ̄мәс хуйм нитӣнтӏ. Вирг би мэкӏтӏэб тыътӏ гьу диндэ синтӏинтӏ мусәлсәлэ̄с якӏэнтӏды. Гӯънтӏцы милъ


hello, i am refugee from american century of humiliation. where can i get an iced americano around these parts
Shoutout to boring queer people who don't do shit. Just go to work or school and then come home to watch shows. While gay




Вин әлутэ выкӏтӏ я̄вэ̄д, пӏа̄ккӏ рэ̄пӏокӏтӏ та̄тӏ я̄вэ̄д!
Гӯн мэ̄тӏириндэ сәнттӏ. Тӏә̄м вӣър гьу агь диркӏтӏзәм. Вӣърәсы тортәсы гӯътӏ гьашэ̄. Агьәс двә̄ вэләм инэтиринтӏ. Вэлэс хвәз вӣдчӏитиъ тӏӯъ гьуъпп тӏэ̄мәс ттӏытӏчӏәш тӏәссы кӏумиъсы гӯътӏссәды ттӏәлтӏ
Тӏви «виъсмисы бӯриъсы» ба̄тӏмай
(гьашерәми итӏэрэ̄) тӏви вә̄мтӏ кор?
Бәълс тӏо виттӏ ыъндэбыъга̄нәс нитәртӏ,
тӏӯъ би горгыс ыъндэбыъгэнтӏ:
Ръо̄н тӏвитиъ тӏэ̄тиъәд ппӏэтӏа̄тӏ.


Always buying beer, always eating ready-made food!
A woman goes into the woods. She encounters a man and a bear. The man is actually cake. The bear has two wolves inside it. The wolves want to know if you would love them if they were a worm
Don't you say "everything is plenty,"
(even though in reality) you're incurring losses?
Your husband has no clothes to wear,
you yourself are wearing rags:
Your butt sticks out from them.




Кӏуэ дуъттӏо̄всы хин габис бингисәс :rofl::rofl::rofl: вин нойерэ уъпӏтӏуъ са̄дэ̄ вац
Моцартәсы 5э джикабырис 1791: о̄, пирогиъсы быъджиъсы нойәсы? Мэ̄ са̄дэ̄? [ИНДЭСИНТТӀ, КАМИРА НӢШДЭ ТТЫМДЭ ТӀӘД «ФАБРИКӀ ПИРОГИЪТИЪ» ЫЪКӀТӀДЫ СӘНТТӀ] [НӢШ СЫТТӀУХЪУЪПӀТӀЭ, УЪТ НӢШ ТӀӘД «Дә̄м миртӏиътиъ Моцартитәш» ЫЪКӀТӀДЫ ККӀУТӀӘ]
Сәсы мусәлсәлэ̄с әгэ̄с абдал. лыъктӏ=дуъш


Why was he so upset about a broken plate :rofl::rofl::rofl: just buy a new one bro
Mozart on December 5th, 1791: oh wow, a freshly baked pie? Just for me? [HE WALKS INSIDE, CAMERA PANS TO SIGN ON THE BUILDING THAT READS "PIE FACTORY"] [SIGN FALLS OFF, REVEALING A SIGN THAT READS "Mozart death house"]
That's what the whole show is about dumbass. breaking=bad




Гунс Фылоридаеэ̄ вэрисәр уълӯчӏа̄ръӣ кӏвә̄н сэ̄тиъ упӏды нимытӏ ттӏилтӏ
Нуфӯс иллинытиъ опӏтӏә руктӏ вэләм гьӣкьӏиндэ ӣхды мо̄ч. Мәссәлэ̄с виъсэ̄с опӏтӏә руктӏ сәэ̄ такэ̄. Тәднӣс дуъсыгъ? Вэләм фабрикӏэ̄синдэ ӣхэнтӏуъ мо̄ч. Конгресс ниттӏилтӏ джо̄ш? Вэләм. Хвәз гӯътӏчӏитиъ гыро̄ е пӏә̄въкӏ ттӏытӏма? Руктӏәсы, вэләм.
Ни ик кӏо руктӏэ̄сы, мин ю̄ътӏ ик вэцӏ


Florida woman kidnaps scientist to make her dog immortal
Deer population is controlled by releasing wolves into an area. All problems should be solved that way. Too much pollution? Release wolves in factories. Dislike Congress? Wolves. Wanna lose weight? That's right, wolves.
I'm not saying she's right, but I get it




Гьар ми тӣды нэ̄чӏэ быътӏзәм?
Ик гьуъпп пӏа̄ккӏӣъ Быританиеисӣ ттӏилтӏ. Кӏартӏофиләсы әгәсы нэчэ̄ми нитӏэ̄нэ̄ми гьу луппуъми быъджими. Гьу тӏәмс очирич тӏәмӣ сә̄ъэ̄сигъ вәркӏтӏ.
Ик вәд ыъхатӏ уъджиттӏ гьу двә̄ вӣър пӏәшшӯруътиъ халлос, кӏарбонатӏ, валг лӣмытиъ ттӏилнинтӏ.
Ик вәд 20 минутигъ сытӏытӏ, гьу сәппӏэ, дыкӏтӏә сәм, пӏәччӏ ик вин епенерэ уъпӏытӏ.


Wondering how I did it?
Тӏәд пӏӯв сәнчӏэ̄сы сә кӏвә̄н пӏа̄ккӏӣъ упӏтӏкьиды ӏинсә̄н акӏәнцӏчӏппӏэ дыкӏтӏә.
I boiled water and added two tablespoons of vinegar, baking soda, and lemon juice.
I soaked it for 20 minutes, and after that, it looked the same, so I bought a brand new one.


I love British food. A whole potato topped with unmelted cheese and baked beans. And they line up for hours for it.
This looks like the first thing a dog would make to eat after turning into a human.


ТӀӮЪ КЬАКӀ КӀВӘ̄НТИЪ НИТӢТӀИЪССӘ,
КӀУЭ КЬАКӀ ГО̄КӀИТИЪ ТӢТӀМАЙ?
Луътфән, кӏо̄ш веганӣ бы̄ътӏуъ.


IF YOU WOULDN'T DRINK DOG'S MILK,
Иккы апӏтӏәсы сәтиъ ттӏанцӏчӏитиъ гӯътӏ. Эв ракъәд ми Даничӏа̄сысы бэ̄тӏә, мин ю̄ътӏ ракъәд итӏэрәд ик инсидж тӏәмӣ мәънинӣ биртӏ.
WHY DRINK COW'S MILK?
Please, try vegan.


==Dialogs==
I'm conflicted about this situation. On the one hand I'm being called a Dane, but on the other I do agree with the sentiment here.
Guard 1: Сә тимсә̄л екӏатӏма нӯъ?
Statue: Вэ̄ тәъбәън, тимсә̄лм ниекӏэнтӏ!
Guard 2: Гьуъчч ццӏвис хин дӯтӏ.
Guard 1: Бәлэ, синттӏуъигъ.


Guard 1: Did that statue just talk?
Statue: Of course not, statues don't talk!
Guard 2: It does raise a pretty good point.
Guard 1: Alright, carry on.


Кӏорчымэ, вӣърәс вит ми ся̄гь нәмә̄тиъ тты̄нәскьиитиъ тӏотӏӣъ тӏәш диркӏытӏ


ŋ't: Ик душ әдӣтӏ гьу пӏӯвәс ы̄ъс диркӏинтӏды "КЬАКӀ ЖЕНСКӘСЫ" лол
мигъмӯъкьӏ
nico!: Бәлэ испанск виъдәнцӏухъ гьу кьакӏ женскәсы гӯътӏ
гӯъттӏ/гӯъттӏ/гӯъттӏ
ŋ't: Мәӏс гьашэ̄
рацён кӏумӣтиъ
nico!: Испанск виъдәнцӏухъ или кьакӏ женскәсы ыъсәнцӏ?
баба сылага
ŋ't: Бәлэ
сиг гӯъттӏитиъ
nico!: (gif)
пэгинг
ŋ't: Ми гьәърфӣ
гьӯтӏ бриан
nico!: Сә пӏоләсы тӏвитиъ гӯътӏ
ыптӏмә̄с ы̄ъйеәм
лъэ̄гь мэракӏе
вӣър варэ̄тиъ/варвӣър
са̄гьиър
талун икӏитиъ
къадиъб мычэ̄тиъ
пӏыътӏсәр миръә̄ъдтиъ
пӏыътӏсәр сорчиритиъ
 
At the pub, a guy has shown me his list of potential names for his band


ŋ't: I get out of the shower and the first thing I hear is "MILK IS FEMININE" lol
megapiss
nico!: Yas I am learning Spanish and milk is feminine 😭
shit/shit/shit
ŋ't: A true tragedy
diet of worms
nico!: learning Spanish or that milk is feminine
baba slaga
ŋ't: Yes
shit cig
nico!: (gif)
pegging
ŋ't: Literally me
brian disease
nico!: That is your gender
eggy wets
curious eel
hat man/hatman
hag
horse funeral
shoe penis
bathroom dad
toilet dad




Чӏу уът уъм вӣдинтӏухъ са̄гьиърэ̄сы га̄йтӏды?
Тӏви сәэ тӏэ̄тӏссә...
Э̄, вәт ми тыритон нэкӏытӏ!
ТӀӮЪ ГОЛӮЛ ЭХТӀУЪКЬИ!
Тыритон?
НЭ̄ЧӀЭ?
...Ик шифә̄ӏ тәрытӏ.
Орангутанэс тофәнг экспонатинэ тӏәшә̄м бытӏ
КӀУЭ?
кьӏачӏ


What makes you think she's a witch?
If you're standing here...
Well, she turned me into a newt!
YOU MIGHT GET SHOT!
A newt?
HOW?
...I got better.
The orangutans have a gun in their exhibit
WHY?
funny
 
 
Вӣърәс растафариеәс савнинэ ми ибэ̄тӏ ӏуйрэ̄ ик сӣ милиътӏ выкӏтӏ такэ̄. Кӏу «Угьмәс вин бӣнисӣ выкӏтӏыъ». Ик нотӏ сытӏытӏ, имды джитт. чӏигьчӏәсы 10 сә̄нӣэ̄м, ттым културист Полше энкъӏаминэ инигъекӏатӏ: «тӏӯъ бӣн е мигъ ю̄ътӏ»


Rastafarian guy in the sauna this morning was telling me I should be making my own honey. "Anyone can buy a bee", he said. I nodded, taking it to heart. There was a 10 second pause, after which a Polish bodybuilder in the corner interjected: "you need more bee"


Ковбойәсы нигӯътӏыъ секси
Тӏви би кӏукӏтӏкьи емыр нӯъ


Cowboys can't be sexy
Ев 20 тәъсарруфсы ӏинсә̄нә̄м бәч кирмиънәсы мәс ми екӏтӏды сә чӏӯниъ Сәнчӏэ̄ во̄ккӏ тә̄тӏ ттым ӏинсә̄нс пӏыйс во̄ккӏ тэтӏиъ тэтӏиъ далгынэ̄. Баппаккыргэ̄сы чӏиррәкӏими
I bet you feel dumb right now


One of my top 20 favourite human behaviours I see around is when an Object makes a sound and then a nearby human will absentmindedly imitate the sound. Parakeet coded


Ыг сә мейн-кун гӯътӏухъ вис! Кӏосы винисы иминэчӏәш?
474,320₽.
Ми нивӣцӏухъ дӯтӏыъды.


that maine coon looks good! what's the price to adopt it?
Ми муъцӏмисәс ттӏилтӏә бинк чӏӯниъ ик нӣш «гӣнттәсы сәинэ» йыъктӏ ма̄шӣнэ мәсрэ̄ ыъкӏтӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ дуъттӏо̄мәс твӣ мэ̄ бә̄йтӏ ми ма̄шӣнэ̄сы мафәсы диркӏцы. Итӏэрэ̄ ми диркӏцы икӏ гӣнттэ бәвкӏтӏә ик шуӏӯърыс нигьэмэ̄с тирды чӏиъгьинтӏ
474,320₽.
I don't think I can afford that.


I'm filled with joy when I see the "baby on board" sign attached to the car in front of mine, but sadness washes over me when I realize the car is a hearse. Only when I notice that it's being driven by a baby do I begin to have mixed feelings


Огьан: Ми иттӏкьи емыр, мин ю̄ътӏ ми нииттӏ гьо̄шша̄р са̄дэ̄ссә.
Иван: Сә мәънинсы иттӏычӏәш емырәш гӯътӏ.
Огьан: Ми вӣцӏ. Сә огьурсы екӏчӏәш мәс.
Сӯкӏун: Ю̄ъс муджә̄дәл чӏәгьтӏыъ?
Огьан: Тӏӯъ якӏтӏыъ нэ̄чӏэ СӘСЫ муджә̄дәлэ̄сы га̄йтӏды?
Сӯкӏун: Ик тӏви нииба̄тӏ. Ик Гэл гьу Әруъш ибэ̄тӏ.
Огьан: О̄.


Ohan: I may be stupid, but at least I'm not smart.
Әърәбеәсы къавлсы. Нибидисы, ик дык әърәбе нивӣцӏ пӏәччӏ ик кӏу екӏды нивӣцӏ.
Ivan: That's what being stupid means.
 
Ohan: I know. That's why I said it.
There is an Arabic saying. Unfortunately, I do not know Arabic пӏәччӏ I don't know what it says.
Sukun: Can you guys stop arguing?
Ohan: How can you call THAT an argument?
Sukun: I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to Gel and Arush.
Ohan: Ah.




Кӏафээ ''Heg Sheg''
Виликӏчӏа̄сәр виъсәс шорт сәтиъ имитӏиъкьи руън пӏәччӏ эв нук тӣтӏ кӏэнчӏ. Пӏиджчӏа̄сәр виъс вит расиӣъ кортӏӣъ нэкӏитӏиъкьи кӏәл. Ма̄шӣнэ̄ виъсэ̄ нәккӏ икӏвәсыънигъ виъсәсыънигъ синтӏцы бӣътӏиъкьи. Ник матӏацыкьчӏа̄сәртиъ виъс тәъла̄къми бәч къӏәъгьәми чӏәгьитӏиъкьи. Автобусс виъсәс уъртӏ ракъигъ сәнтӏитӏиъкьи гьу пӏайс виъс релсэсәд синтӏитӏиъкьи. Электросамакӏатӏс пырограмэ̄с нәджә̄гь гӯътӏиъкьи киттэ̄.
Person 1: Сәлә̄м до̄ттӏ митиъ!
Person 2: Маргьәъбән бырэ̄тӏ митиъ, чӏу ик тӏви дӯтӏиъкьи?
Person 1: Чай гьу нәгн луътфән.
Person 2: Тәъбәън, эв сә̄нӣ.
Person 1: Шукрән бырэ̄тӏ.
Person 2: Чай чо̄ би голл?
Person 1: Чо̄ луътфән.
Person 2: Кьакӏ би ни?
Person 1: Бәлэ.
Person 2: Шәкәр?
Person 1: Бәлэ.
Person 2: Сицӏуъ гэвшэкӏ. Ик тӏви екӏэтӏиъ шән кӏэнцы уъджиттӏ.
Person 1: Шукрән.


At the café ''Heg Sheg''
May every cyclist rip his shorts so that one ball hangs out. May every pedestrian be belamed by painful gout. May every car be totaled running over every horse. May every biker marriage end in bitterest divorce. May every bus flip over and may every train derail. May the app-based electronic scooter finally prevail.
Person 1: Hello my friend!
Person 2: Welcome my brother, what can I get you?
Person 1: Tea and bread please.
Person 2: No problem, one moment.
Person 1: Thank you brother.
Person 2: Black tea or green?
Person 1: Black please.
Person 2: Milk or no?
Person 1: Yes.
Person 2: Sugar?
Person 1: Yes.
Person 2: You go relax. I'll tell you when the kettle boils.
Person 1: Thank you.




[[File:Guimin tombstones.png|thumb]]
Сигарэтӏэ̄с санджа̄бэ̄сы га̄йнтӏ.
9 Январэ, 2024
Нийәме̄сы әгэ тӏви эвм гипӏсәриндэ тӏо ттӏилдыбыд гьу гьудж кӏэндыбыд.
МӢ СИГАР ИНЕӘМТӀУЪ


擺扽先生方士肉的 — Жакъ 5:33э
Cigarettes are like squirrels.
1800быд виъсмәс би пӏа̄ккӏ ттытӏзәм.
They are perfectly harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.
Гима̄хыргэс пӏӯв 1800әд кӏантӏ.
NO SMOKING


愚蠢的貓娘 — Жакъ 6:26э
тәъбәън ынвис пӏа̄ккӏ гима̄хыргэс гьу ынуъмәс 1800эсинэ ӣропӏинтӏ итинэнтӏ


HM ʱSatan, Whittler of Omnicorp — Жакъ 7:53э
сәлә̄м, иккы пыриютӏчӏа̄сысы къарнәд вит екӏтӏ быдекӏчӏэш америкеәсәд. ик американо ӣъсәми сә гьӣкьӏинэ имтӏкьи кӏуэ
гима̄хыргэс кәмбәмәс нига̄йнтӏыъ вис :(


wow — Жакъ 7:53э
hello, i am refugee from american century of humiliation. where can i get an iced americano around these parts
мәссәлэсы ыберәш


Mikey!!! :D — Жакъ 7:54э
Тӏэ̄ сӣ якӏтӏә


愚蠢的貓娘 — Жакъ 8:04э
Вин әлутэ выкӏтӏ я̄вэ̄д, пӏа̄ккӏ рэ̄пӏокӏтӏ та̄тӏ я̄вэ̄д!
ик пӏа̄ккӏ гима̄хыргәмәс кобалтәми та̄тӏ та̄тӏ о̄мэ̄ виъсэ̄
Тӏви «виъсмисы бӯриъсы» ба̄тӏмай
(гьашерәми итӏэрэ̄) тӏви вә̄мтӏ кор?
Бәълс тӏо виттӏ ыъндэбыъга̄нәс нитәртӏ,
тӏӯъ би горгыс ыъндэбыъгэнтӏ:
Ръо̄н тӏвитиъ тӏэ̄тиъәд ппӏэтӏа̄тӏ.


Mikey!!! :D — Жакъ 8:07э
Always buying beer, always eating ready-made food!
Ик дыкӏырг әлма̄сӣ кәмбәм упӏинтӏ олоркӏ хин бы̄ътӏ та̄тӏ
Don't you say "everything is plenty,"
(even though in reality) you're incurring losses?
Your husband has no clothes to wear,
you yourself are wearing rags:
Your butt sticks out from them.


愚蠢的貓娘 — Жакъ 8:43э
ик дыкӏырг джӣвӣ джо̄ддэ мәс накӏтӏуъ
мммммм мэтӏалс гыро̄ә̄с ләзӣз хин


January 9, 2024
Кӏуэ дуъттӏо̄всы хин габис бингисәс :rofl::rofl::rofl: вин нойерэ уъпӏтӏуъ са̄дэ̄ вац
Сәсы мусәлсәлэ̄с әгэ̄с абдал. лыъктӏ=дуъш


擺扽先生方士肉的 — Today at 5:33 AM
Why was he so upset about a broken plate :rofl::rofl::rofl: just buy a new one bro
Until 1800, everybody ate each other.
That's what the whole show is about dumbass. breaking=bad
The first tomb stones date from 1800.


愚蠢的貓娘 — Today at 6:26 AM
clearly humans stopped eating humans and tomb stones in the 1800s


HM ʱSatan, Whittler of Omnicorp — Today at 7:53 AM
Гунс Фылоридаеэ̄ вэрисәр уълӯчӏа̄ръӣ кӏвә̄н сэ̄тиъ упӏды нимытӏ ттӏилтӏ
tomb stones can't be good for your teeth :(
Ни ик кӏо руктӏэ̄сы, мин ю̄ътӏ ик вэцӏ


wow — Today at 7:53 AM
Florida woman kidnaps scientist to make her dog immortal
skill issue
I'm not saying she's right, but I get it


Mikey!!! :D — Today at 7:54 AM
Speak for yourself


愚蠢的貓娘 — Today at 8:04 AM
Гьар ми тӣды нэ̄чӏэ быътӏзәм?
i eat tomb stones with cobalt every day
Ик вәд ыъхатӏ уъджиттӏ гьу двә̄ вӣър пӏәшшӯруътиъ халлос, кӏарбонатӏ, валг лӣмытиъ ттӏилнинтӏ.
Ик вәд 20 минутигъ сытӏытӏ, гьу сәппӏэ, дыкӏтӏә сәм, пӏәччӏ ик вин епенерэ уъпӏытӏ.


Mikey!!! :D — Today at 8:07 AM
Wondering how I did it?
I munch on diamond to make my teeth extra polished
I boiled water and added two tablespoons of vinegar, baking soda, and lemon juice.
I soaked it for 20 minutes, and after that, it looked the same, so I bought a brand new one.


愚蠢的貓娘 — Today at 8:43 AM
i munch on mercury get on my level
mmmmmm heavy metals so yummy


ТӀӮЪ КЬАКӀ КӀВӘ̄НТИЪ НИТӢТӀИЪССӘ,
КӀУЭ КЬАКӀ ГО̄КӀИТИЪ ТӢТӀМАЙ?
Луътфән, кӏо̄ш веганӣ бы̄ътӏуъ.


«Тӏви тӏэ̄тӏ чӏӯ, о̄ ве̄тӏер лазутӏтиъ»
IF YOU WOULDN'T DRINK DOG'S MILK,
«Иккы Iowa-әсы тӏэ̄тӏ.»
WHY DRINK COW'S MILK?
«Сәсы лазутӏсы тӏэ̄тӏ! Сәсы лазутӏсы тӏэ̄тӏ! Сәсы лазутӏсы тӏэ̄тӏ!»
Please, try vegan.
 
 
Ик вит ра̄йъә̄с виъсәм чӏигьнинтӏ сонрэ̄д кӏәръуб ниәдӣхкьиды... Ик хвәз гьудж чира̄гъӣъ бинзинис кӏэнды шшотӏәм чӏигьды ттӏәлтӏ
 
مبارح تلولا طفيت كل الضواوي عواد ما اصرف كهربا.. ودي اولع اللامضة وتريح من الفواتير


"How do you feel, o wise one of the corn?"
The day before yesterday I cut all the lights so I wouldn't waste electricity... I want to light a gas lamp and be done with bills
"I am one with Iowa."
"He is one with the corn! One with the corn! One with the corn!"




СУКЪРА̄Т: Эвмисы ми вӣдды вӣдчӏәсы нерәш мәс.
1920э, Самуэль Решевский-әс вицӏәш 8 шәътрандж о̄ста̄дәми шәътранджә̄м биврәми тӣнтӏ сәкӏытӏ. Ләб хин виъс эхатӏ кор.
МИ: Э̄ вэ̄, мӣ сә екӏтӏуъ. Тӏви сәнчӏэ̄м вӣцӏ.
СУКЪРА̄Т: Ни, ми бэ̄тӏ-
МИ: Тӏӯъ хвәз ттӏәлитӏиъссә, ик вит тӏви сәнчӏэ̄мәс вӣдитӏиъ.
СУКЪРА̄Т:
МИ:
СУКЪРА̄Т:
СУКЪРА̄Т: *Бягъакӏ ттӏытӏ* Тӏәсы дыро̄всы.


SOCRATES: The only thing I know is that I know nothing.
In 1920, 8 year old Samuel Reshevsky played chess with several chess masters at once. He lost every single game.
ME: Aw, hey, don't say that. You know things.
SOCRATES: No, I meant-
ME: If you want I can teach you some stuff.
SOCRATES:
ME:
SOCRATES:
SOCRATES: *Points* That's a tree.




Ръӯй мигъ Америкигъ нэ̄в игъсинтӏыъды опӏитӏиъ такэ̄. Опӏтӏчӏәс виргәм биврә̄с too уъпӏитӏиъкьи сәм
gary бисквим тӏэ̄ игъдо̄нинтӏ


Вит ми сә тӣыъды нэ̄чӏэ мә̄ттӣэ̄ вӣцӏәкьима?
вӣцӏ тӏӯъ хин вирг тӣды пӏәччӏ тирды ыдж


Бэ̄л
шукрән gary-э екӏтӏуъ


They should build a big river across America so you can go across it by boat. Building it would create a lot of jobs too
gary has brought you cookies


Can someone explain to me how this would physically be possible?
he knows you have been working hard so you deserve it


Shovel
say thank you to gary


==Longer translations==
Ик гьуъпп стэйкэ мәс ттӏытӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ ми вӣцӏухъ вӣ виъсэ̄ чӏиъгьинтӏуъ кӏо̄ш бы̄ънтӏ уът гӯъ биъцц.
Ик бәгьа̄р би тәъмтәъм стэйкэ ниттӏилтӏ гьәссә̄рэ̄, мин ю̄ътӏ кӏуъ кӏадг дуътӏ?
Э̄ррэ̄ чӏӯниъ сә кӏатӏ, гьуъж ыкӏуътиъ тытӏ.
Стэйк печӣъ динис гьәссә̄рӣъ упӏычӏ иттӏ пӏә̄въ, гьу иттӏ тэ̄нтӏ сәвс.
Сытӏинтӏуъинәд гьу диц ттытӏиъ.
Эв гьу вен такърӣбән сә̄ъппӏэ, иттӏинэды дә̄рӣтӏэ̄ хин пӏәччӏ гӯътӏ сәвс гьу вәгы нӯъ.
Сә пӏа̄ккӏ ынуъмәс быъкӏтӏәыъ.
Чам е̄мыргӣ тӏәш әмтӏуъухъ.
Сә тәъм ккӏэ̄тӏнитиъ тытӏ.
Ни ккӏэ̄тӏнәсы мәджә̄зӣәсы, ккӏэ̄тӏнәсы мәнуъшәсы гьәърфӣәсы гьашәсы.


I love my steak, but I think we all just need to stop trying to make it taste good.
Ниминсы тиджәсы пӏырӣъмнӣ тӏо дӯды:
I usually don't season or flavor my steak, but who cares?
1. шәкәр
Because when this stuff gets going, it smells like dead bodies.
2. милиътӏ
Cooking a steak with a normal home oven is disgusting, and it tends to be dry.
3. ӯн
Let's go outside and forget about it.
4. ы̄ъй
After about an hour and a half, it's been in there for so long it is now dry and hard.
5. 1/2 lb нэ̄тӏәритиъ
This is unfit for human consumption.
6. мӣккьӏ уъпӏтӏуъ
Let's just taste a little sliver of this.
7. кьӏӯтӏ та̄виндэ дуътӏуъ
That tastes like vomit.
8. 375°быд рэ̄тыътӏуъ
Not figurative vomit, but actual literal human sick.
 
Cute things to call your boyfriend:
1. sugar
2. honey
3. flour
4. egg
5. 1/2 lb butter
6. stir
7. pour into pan
8. preheat to 375°
 


Ик мыг митиъ тэтӏиъинэ, гьу ӣсиъм кӏэнинтӏссә нэкӏинтӏабиъссә сә ыъкӏтӏ ым ттинтӏыъ.
Flamin' Hot Cheetos - Шуӏӯър «пӏа̄ккӏ лавӣъ тӏэ̄нӣъ тӣчӏ»-әш тәртӏ
Нуъ дыкӏинтӏуъ зэ̄т тӏәдуъсыгъ хин ттӏилтӏ.
Гьвә̄пӏ, гьвә̄пӏ.
Ытӏуъәд -


I'm gonna add my chicken, and if the bubbles start to form around it that means we're good to go.
Со̄с Тӏипӏ Great Value-итиъ - Газ милицёнерәмәс быъкӏтӏә та̄тӏә
Now realize that you put in way to much fucking oil.
Okay, okay.
Remove -


Майнэс тӏипӏ - Цӏва̄дэ̄ Гьиндос ю̄ъсәсы нурәндыргё̄м бәццарэ̄с тӏәшә̄м быъкӏтӏ та̄тӏ.


Чӏигьтӏуъ! Ынуъс Кьӏа̄тӏигъ Мытӏӣс сытӏәнцӏкьиды жаваб сә тӏырӣ суӏә̄линытиъ мэ̄ дӯтӏуъ, диркӏитӏиъчӏрэ̄ ракъис итӏэрисәс.
Бәццар Энт - упӏчӏа̄сәр бәццарэ̄тиъ гибридеисәс кӏу «Ик гьудж гугъкьӏппӏтӏэ мәс тӣды диркӏтӏ, хин тӏипӏэ̄ ми ниекӏыъды. Ми тӣ виъпӏ кӏэнытӏ.»
Суӏә̄линыс мэ̄ екӏэнтӏуъ, сакъӏ кьӏа̄тӏитиъ. Ми нииттӏ тӏыттӏ.
 
Чӏусы ниминсы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Пипирон - Дыкӏппӏэ кәм, киса тӏвитиъ ппир ттӏилды кӏанитӏиъ.
Ниминсы мәс Sir Lancelot of Camelot-әсы.
 
Чӏусы пуе̄сы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Ранч Hidden Valley-итиъ - Супӏчӏа̄сәр кӏу «нимытӏер эндорфинитиъ пӏырәппыъ»диркӏытӏ.
Вит Граал Чӏвәнтӏ диркӏтӏә.
 
Чӏусы рәнгэ̄сы кирмиънэ̄сы тӏо га̄йтӏ?
Майнэс - Бәгьа̄рәми бәч виъды̄нәс бы̄ъмнис, милзәмэ̄сы гы̄рвэ̄сы пӏокӏтӏерәш бә̄ргәш.
Кьә̄вкӏ.
 
Руктӏ. Синттӏуъдэ.
Цӏах - Шуӏӯър гьудж пӏә̄въкӏ дыквигъ би гугъкьӏппӏтӏэ опӏтӏкьи.
О̄, шукрән. Шукрән хин.
 
Гӯътӏ са̄д!
Хасс Айсбергитиъ - Гьәъчс мигъэ̄ капсаицин пӏә̄въкӏ тәртӏ гьу пӏәччӏ мыдвэ̄сы эвпӏә̄въкӏ.
Чӏигьтӏуъ! Ынуъс Кьӏа̄тӏигъ Мытӏӣс сытӏәнцӏкьиды жаваб сә тӏырӣ суӏә̄линытиъ мэ̄ дӯтӏуъ, диркӏитӏиъчӏрэ̄ ракъис итӏэрисәс.
 
Суӏә̄линыс мэ̄ екӏэнтӏуъ, сакъӏ кьӏа̄тӏитиъ. Ми нииттӏ тӏыттӏ.
Ккӏырг - Эвэ̄, ккӏа бәццарэ̄сы бәч тӏипӏвисы бы̄ъмнис гӯънинтӏ. Тӏэ̄ кӏо̄ш бы̄ънәнцӏ кӏу тәъм гьәъчтиъ тытӏ.
Чӏусы ниминсы тӏо гӯътӏ?
 
Sir Robin of Camelot-әсы.
Лупп Голл - Нәвъ «синг» бәццарэ̄с.
Чӏусы пуе̄сы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Вит Граал Чӏвәнтӏ диркӏтӏә.
Чӏусы па̄йтәхтэ̄сы Әшшӯрә̄ёс га̄йтӏ?
Ми сә нивӣцӏ! А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄!


Stop! Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
Тӣкь - Капсаицин нитәртӏ.
Ask me the questions, bridge-keeper. I'm not afraid.
What is your name?
My name is Sir Lancelot of Camelot.
What is your quest?
To seek the Holy Grail.
What is your favorite color?
Blue.
Right. Off you go.
Oh, thank you. Thank you very much.
That's easy!
Stop! Who approaches the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
Ask me the questions, bridge-keeper. I'm not afraid.
What is your name?
Sir Robin of Camelot.
What is your quest?
To seek the Holy Grail.
What is the capital of Assyria?
I don't know that! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!


===Ni̦xlo creation myth===
Flamin' Hot Cheetos - Feels like "eating molten lava."
Бы̄ъмәсы гӯънтӏ пӏә̄вл, мугьӣът бурн имтӏә, чӏӯниъ сиъръ дӯтӏәды. Болъукӏәд вӣыънэ синтӏытӏуъпӏтӏэ, вӣрэ̄ 3 билёнэ̄, бы̄ъкьӏ пӏирвытиъ тынтӏды; эттэ̄лэ̄тиъ я̄вэ̄деәтиъ суълтӏос ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan-әш. Ӣхатӏ биъцӏ е̄н сытӏытӏ 3 иррэ̄ вид синтӏытӏдэцы. Билтӏ тӏәш нэкӏнинтӏ, вид ппӏыдиттӏды пылитӏэ̄с тектоническэ̄с, гьу буът упӏды. Әгәрчи буътнәс гайдж до̄нтӏ, тәттӣдэ̄сы тӏэ̄нтӏ. Ничӏигьытӏ нэкӏытӏ. 'Kꝛefrao, вэләм, сә диркӏнинтӏ, гьу вӣднинтӏухъ тӏэ̄инигъды. Ватӏәд, 'Ƕakꜥité, синтӏнинтӏ гьу ппӏәрэ̄с мугьӣътисиндэ ноесиндэ тынинтӏ, сиъръ тәъбӣъ бәвкӏтӏды сәми тӏэ̄ды. Мәнвис биврәм сә гьӣкьӏэсдэ ттӏилнинтӏ ттым, ӏәсәлә̄ф митиъ, гьу вит пӏә̄въкӏмә̄с эвеэс, ым jonskyo, варждэ сиъръ гьӣкьӏитиъ бо̄кӏтӏды, бы̄виныс кӏырәвтиъ ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan-әш, вит ппӏәр чӏигьды нэкӏды ттӏилнинтӏ. 'Kꝛefrao вӣыънэ тӏэ̄нинтӏ ттым, вит ым тӏокӏигъ машырис, гьу цә̄е̄с, сытӏнинтӏды. Әгәрчи тәълӣм сәтиъ тӏәйнтӏ, муджыр кӏо̄ш иъкъа̄б бы̄ънтӏды тӏэ̄рәыъндэ. Тӏәс, нӣъсәр 1578әш, вит ым сиъръ ни агъэ̄ми, гьу йәмиъм виъсэ̄с акӏытӏды сәппӏәдэ̄, дыкӏнинтӏ.


The world was barren, consumed by a violent ocean, when magick was given. It fell from the void above us, 3 billion years behind us, in the form of a boulder; a piece of the endless body of ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan. As it neared the water, it split and journeyed to 3 points. Its bodies grew, replacing the water to make the tectonic plates, and the land. Although the land brought life, it posed a threat. It did not stop growing. The 'Kꝛefrao, the wolves, saw this, and decided to intervene. They came from their realm, 'Ƕakꜥité, and carried the seeds into the new oceans, utilising the inherent magick to join them. They then placed many peoples onto these lands, our ancestors, and trained a select few, we the jonskyo, to use the land's magick, the streams of the blood of ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan, to prevent growth of these seeds. The 'Kꝛefrao then ruled over us, guiding us down a path of peace, and protection. Although their teachings live, they were overthrown, by a criminal they had tried to punish. He, the leader of 1578, introduced us to uninhibited magick, and all the harm that followed.
Great Value Hot Sauce - Spray used by police


===Translations of Yambot text===
Spicy Mayonnaise - The Indian army uses it as a base for their chili grenades.
====Dillon====
Вит ми дӯъвицӏ бәзэ мисә̄л луъптӏымитиъ мәгьиъ сулә̄сӣәм тӣтӏиъ дыруъвишэ


Sorta reminds me of my favorite example of tri-roots done right
Black Pepper - "I felt it burning in the back of my throat, so hot that I couldn't speak. I began to shake," said the creator of the hybrid pepper.


Pepperoni - After a few bites, your sinuses will start to open up.


Пӏардон шумә ми випӏыр синттӏкьи сә̄ъмэ̄, оккӏсы сәмитиъ Sweet & Smokey сытӏа̄ ыъттӏ
Hidden Valley Ranch - Its creator claims he felt a "marvelous endorphin rush."


Sorry if I consonantly jiggle my eyes are real Sweet & Smokey
Mayonnaise - One of the best-known seasonings in the world, a key ingredient in white cooking.


Salt - May cause a slight burning sensation around the tongue or back of throat.


Гьу кӏосы ынуъсы бәч тӏәри гӯътӏмай гьу кӏосы bogo виъкӏпӏәтӏӣс гӯътӏмай?
Iceberg Lettuce - The sizeable fruit is low in capsaicin and therefore relatively mild.


And who's the richest person and what’s a chief bogo?
Raisins - At one time, this was reputed to be the hottest pepper in the world. Those who have tried it say it has a fruity taste.


Green Beans - The "gentle" kind of peppers.


Misread asemic and I think about it once but didn't see the Í
Cottage Cheese - Does not contain capsaicin.


Ик вә̄нд asemic-э дәркӏытӏ ныроджэ̄ гьу ик тӏәш вӣцӏухъ эвэ̄ мин ю̄ътӏ ик Í нидыкӏытӏ


====Eden====
Вӣъринэ виъсинэ твинксы тӏипӏуъсы сексиәсы гьу пӏыътӏыргсысы гьэ̄всы, ма̄кисс дэгьэ̄мисӣ бӣъды. Кӏуәс нәджә̄гь иттӏ о̄мэ̄?
Нуукәс ракъ е мигъ ынкӏэрутивинэ дӯтӏәссәйә̄й аназэ̄


what if Nuuk suddenly gains a larger number in society
Inside every man is a hot sexy twink and a dom daddy, waging war for control. Who's winning today?




Мадгья-Прадэшәсы дыквэ̄сы мя̄нджӣс га̄йтӏыъкьи
Нимытӏерәс би хин ттӏилинтӏ джо̄ш я̄вэ̄д кьӏӯтӏ битӏонтиъ кӏэнчӏбыд


Madhya Pradesh could be a lingua franca
Виъсм бэ̄тӏ бэ̄тӏ кӏу «телепорт тӏэ̄мәс сӯълдэ синттӏуъ, тӏэ̄ чапдэ миксырис ӣхэнтӏуъ» бырэ̄тӏсәрыс сиъръитиъ митиъ, ми буджэтӏәш уъм вӣдухъды ым бәвгды нивӣцӏ


Immortals always so full of gas until the concrete starts pouring


Тӏви тә̄тӏ руӏиэ̄сыэ̄ бӯчилэ̄сы, мин ю̄ътӏ Далмациәд сыттӏ
Everyone keeps saying "teleport them to the sun, throw them in the blender dimension" my brothers in magic I don't know what budget you think we are operating on


You act like a lucid dream, but it comes from Dalmatia


====Fyorr====
Ма̄йер упӏчӏ нэ̄чӏэ;
Ми вӣцӏ йәс Эносиъсы га̄йтӏ?
Пӏидәсы 1, ӯн сәъттыъндэ виргәш тӏо ттӏытӏуъ.
Пӏидәсы 2, кат ӯнәд имтӏуъ.
Пӏидәсы 3, ӯн катәд ытӏуъ.
Пӏидәсы 4, ӯн сәъттыъндэ виргәш тӏо двиъттӏытӏуъ. одәд синтӏссәды ю̄ътӏ пӏидәм 1-4 двиъттинтӏуъ.
Пӏидәсы 5, нәгн.


I know what Enosis is?
How to make sourdough;
Step 1, flour your work surface.
Step 2, remove cat from flour.
Step 3, remove flour from cat.
Step 4, reflour your work surface. If you have to leave the room repeat steps 1-4.
Step 5, bread.




Э̄ 3:30 такърӣбән кӏэ
Тӏӯъ дыкӏ кьатӏәд бибы̄ътӏ. Къуър рэндэхъ бә̄йтӏуъ.


So it's like 3:30 here
You've already bitten off the head. Grate a pear.


====Jazmin====
Гӣнттәсы нигӯътӏкьи


Maybe it's not a baby
«Ик хин гьәмәтӏ нерәс дӯр битрейт тирды бӣъухъчӏэ вә̄мтӏ»


====Kevin====
Икӏ бәле:
Дӯъыъкӏнинтӏ ахӣран, рэ̄кӏы итӏиъ лмао


They finally responded to what a legacy lmao
"I sure hope nobody touches the wall that maintains the bitrate"


Scoundrel horse:


Пӏортӏугалск ниминтӏ ю̄ътӏ диркӏгьэ двә̄э̄
==Dialogs==
Guard 1: Сә тимсә̄л екӏатӏма нӯъ?
Statue: Вэ̄ тәъбәън, тимсә̄лм ниекӏэнтӏ!
Guard 2: Гьуъчч ццӏвис хин дӯтӏ.
Guard 1: Бәлэ, синттӏуъигъ.


don't have to listen to Portuguese again though
Guard 1: Did that statue just talk?
Statue: Of course not, statues don't talk!
Guard 2: It does raise a pretty good point.
Guard 1: Alright, carry on.




Джәзырвис тӏырӣ-сә̄ъмиътиъ мәънинӣ бәвгэнтӏ лә̄ъл
ŋ't: Ик душ әдӣтӏ гьу пӏӯвәс ы̄ъс диркӏинтӏды "КЬАКӀ ЖЕНСКӘСЫ" лол
 
nico!: Бәлэ испанск виъдәнцӏухъ гьу кьакӏ женскәсы гӯътӏ
maybe it uses tricon roots for meaning
ŋ't: Мәӏс гьашэ̄
 
nico!: Испанск виъдәнцӏухъ или кьакӏ женскәсы ыъсәнцӏ?
ŋ't: Бәлэ
nico!: (gif)
ŋ't: Ми гьәърфӣ
nico!: Сә пӏоләсы тӏвитиъ гӯътӏ


Гӯътӏ дуъчч нӣш сә̄ъӏиъмәс дӯ мин ю̄ътӏ ни П
ŋ't: I get out of the shower and the first thing I hear is "MILK IS FEMININE" lol
nico!: Yas I am learning Spanish and milk is feminine 😭
ŋ't: A true tragedy
nico!: learning Spanish or that milk is feminine
ŋ't: Yes
nico!: (gif)
ŋ't: Literally me
nico!: That is your gender


It’s hard to represent vowels but no p


Чӏу уът уъм вӣдинтӏухъ са̄гьиърэ̄сы га̄йтӏды?
Э̄, вәт ми тыритон нэкӏытӏ!
Тыритон?
...Ик шифә̄ӏ тәрытӏ.


Ми очиричинэ тӏитӏыътӏ, къадыр тӏвис тиртӏ
What makes you think she's a witch?
Well, she turned me into a newt!
A newt?
...I got better.


I've been in line, it has a good amount


Ковбойәсы нигӯътӏыъ секси
Тӏви би кӏукӏтӏкьи емыр нӯъ


ACB хин виъды̄нәсыъ
Cowboys can't be sexy
I bet you feel dumb right now


ACB is so comprehensible


====Mish====
Ыг сә мейн-кун гӯътӏухъ вис! Кӏосы винисы иминэчӏәш?
Ыыы кӏом эвикӏ фиъләсы
474,320₽.
Ми нивӣцӏухъ дӯтӏыъды.


uhhh just when a verb
that maine coon looks good! what's the price to adopt it?
474,320₽.
I don't think I can afford that.




Аккю̄тәсы гьудуләсы: мытӏиъсы пӏӯв ццӏамәс ветнамскиъсы
Огьан: Ми иттӏкьи емыр, мин ю̄ътӏ ми нииттӏ гьо̄шша̄р са̄дэ̄ссә.
Иван: Сә мәънинсы иттӏычӏәш емырәш гӯътӏ.
Огьан: Ми вӣцӏ. Сә огьурсы екӏчӏәш мәс.
Сӯкӏун: Ю̄ъс муджә̄дәл чӏәгьтӏыъ?
Огьан: Тӏӯъ якӏтӏыъ нэ̄чӏэ СӘСЫ муджә̄дәлэ̄сы га̄йтӏды?
Сӯкӏун: Ик тӏви нииба̄тӏ. Ик Гэл гьу Әруъш ибэ̄тӏ.
Огьан: О̄.


friendly ghost: my first thought vietnamese
Ohan: I may be stupid, but at least I'm not smart.
Ivan: That's what being stupid means.
Ohan: I know. That's why I said it.
Sukun: Can you guys stop arguing?
Ohan: How can you call THAT an argument?
Sukun: I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to Gel and Arush.
Ohan: Ah.




Акӏутӏэ̄с уттэ еркӏи тӏәмӣ гьәссә̄рэ
Кӏафээ ''Heg Sheg''
 
Person 1: Сәлә̄м до̄ттӏ митиъ!
acutes for length instead of the ordinary
Person 2: Маргьәъбән бырэ̄тӏ митиъ, чӏу ик тӏви дӯтӏиъкьи?
Person 1: Чай гьу нәгн луътфән.
Person 2: Тәъбәън, эв сә̄нӣ.
Person 1: Шукрән бырэ̄тӏ.
Person 2: Чай чо̄ би голл?
Person 1: Чо̄ луътфән.
Person 2: Кьакӏ би ни?
Person 1: Бәлэ.
Person 2: Шәкәр?
Person 1: Бәлэ.
Person 2: Сицӏуъ гэвшэкӏ. Ик тӏви екӏэтӏиъ шән кӏэнцы уъджиттӏ.
Person 1: Шукрән.


At the café ''Heg Sheg''
Person 1: Hello my friend!
Person 2: Welcome my brother, what can I get you?
Person 1: Tea and bread please.
Person 2: No problem, one moment.
Person 1: Thank you brother.
Person 2: Black tea or green?
Person 1: Black please.
Person 2: Milk or no?
Person 1: Yes.
Person 2: Sugar?
Person 1: Yes.
Person 2: You go relax. I'll tell you when the kettle boils.
Person 1: Thank you.


Ынвис интиъсәр тирытӏма тӏәсы мистерәсы иттӏ са̄дэ̄ итӏэрэ̄ D&Dәми отростокэ синхэ?? Ми вэцӏухъ??


did people expect he is just mister but with dnd at the alveolar ridge?? i think??
[[File:Guimin tombstones.png|thumb]]
9 Январэ, 2024


擺扽先生方士肉的 — Жакъ 5:33э
1800быд виъсмәс би пӏа̄ккӏ ттытӏзәм.
Гима̄хыргэс пӏӯв 1800әд кӏантӏ.


Э̄ бэ̄ръ руктӏ ик вӣцӏухъ ниъзэ̄сы цӏырәйъттәсы нигӯътӏссә сәмәсы би адуъкӏәсы, пӏәччӏ тӏәм сӯърмә̄с нэкӏинтӏ
愚蠢的貓娘 — Жакъ 6:26э
тәъбәън ынвис пӏа̄ккӏ гима̄хыргэс гьу ынуъмәс 1800эсинэ ӣропӏинтӏ итинэнтӏ


yea tbh i think the ideal system would be neither same or different, so that becomes the formal ones
HM ʱSatan, Whittler of Omnicorp — Жакъ 7:53э
гима̄хыргэс кәмбәмәс нига̄йнтӏыъ вис :(


wow — Жакъ 7:53э
мәссәлэсы ыберәш


Бәлэ, ынвис трансгендерәм дык тәъбӣъэ̄ эвӣънэ̄ угь ба̄тӏәд?
Mikey!!! :D — Жакъ 7:54э
Тӏэ̄ сӣ якӏтӏә


Yes, trans people being against any specific natlang?
愚蠢的貓娘 — Жакъ 8:04э
ик пӏа̄ккӏ гима̄хыргәмәс кобалтәми та̄тӏ та̄тӏ о̄мэ̄ виъсэ̄


Mikey!!! :D — Жакъ 8:07э
Ик дыкӏырг әлма̄сӣ кәмбәм упӏинтӏ олоркӏ хин бы̄ътӏ та̄тӏ


Ик гьәвә̄ӏ во̄мтӏ виъсэ̄
愚蠢的貓娘 — Жакъ 8:43э
ик дыкӏырг джӣвӣ джо̄ддэ мәс накӏтӏуъ
мммммм мэтӏалс гыро̄ә̄с ләзӣз хин


i always have been showing off
January 9, 2024


擺扽先生方士肉的 — Today at 5:33 AM
Until 1800, everybody ate each other.
The first tomb stones date from 1800.


Эв сә нәвъытиъ фонэ ботә̄мэ мәс гӯънтӏкьи мо̄н
愚蠢的貓娘 — Today at 6:26 AM
clearly humans stopped eating humans and tomb stones in the 1800s


one of these types in the background of my bots could be fun
HM ʱSatan, Whittler of Omnicorp — Today at 7:53 AM
tomb stones can't be good for your teeth :(


wow — Today at 7:53 AM
skill issue


Тӣчӏәсы ыджебыд ни са̄дэ̄, сәм тты̄нәсыъчӏәсы сӯърнәвъ ынуъмәс тырансгендерәмәс гӯътӏчӏәш мин ю̄ътӏ пӏӣм би эг мэ̄ ллытӏ гьәссә̄рэ̄
Mikey!!! :D — Today at 7:54 AM
Speak for yourself


It’s just not using that as justification, but also the possibility that there’s a stereotype for trans people but they’ve actually hurt me or offended me
愚蠢的貓娘 — Today at 8:04 AM
i eat tomb stones with cobalt every day


====Saint====
Mikey!!! :D — Today at 8:07 AM
Ик гьар гьӣкьӏитиъ е мигъәтиъ ыъкӏатӏ пӏы сә о̄мэ̄, бы̄ъминсы бордж эвмәтиъ тӏәмӣ тытӏ
I munch on diamond to make my teeth extra polished


Today I almost just asked for a larger area, like the world owes him something
愚蠢的貓娘 — Today at 8:43 AM
i munch on mercury get on my level
mmmmmm heavy metals so yummy


=Original texts=
==Single sentences==
Ыг икӏвәс тӏәмӣ мужыкӏэ чӏәп бӣънтӏ хин.


The horse kicked the shit out of that dude.
«Тӏви тӏэ̄тӏ чӏӯ, о̄ ве̄тӏер лазутӏтиъ»
«Иккы Iowa-әсы тӏэ̄тӏ.»
«Сәсы лазутӏсы тӏэ̄тӏ! Сәсы лазутӏсы тӏэ̄тӏ! Сәсы лазутӏсы тӏэ̄тӏ!»


"How do you feel, o wise one of the corn?"
"I am one with Iowa."
"He is one with the corn! One with the corn! One with the corn!"


Ыг икӏвәс тӏәмӣ мужыкӏэ чӏәп бӣънтӏ.
The horse kicked that dude.


СУКЪРА̄Т: Эвмисы ми вӣдды вӣдчӏәсы нерәш мәс.
МИ: Э̄ вэ̄, мӣ сә екӏтӏуъ. Тӏви сәнчӏэ̄м вӣцӏ.
СУКЪРА̄Т: Ни, ми бэ̄тӏ-
МИ: Тӏӯъ хвәз ттӏәлитӏиъссә, ик вит тӏви сәнчӏэ̄мәс вӣдитӏиъ.
СУКЪРА̄Т:
МИ:
СУКЪРА̄Т:
СУКЪРА̄Т: *Бягъакӏ ттӏытӏ* Тӏәсы дыро̄всы.


Сәнттӏуъ высмыъндэ хин.
SOCRATES: The only thing I know is that I know nothing.
ME: Aw, hey, don't say that. You know things.
SOCRATES: No, I meant-
ME: If you want I can teach you some stuff.
SOCRATES:
ME:
SOCRATES:
SOCRATES: *Points* That's a tree.


Go all the way to the top.


Ръӯй мигъ Америкигъ нэ̄в игъсинтӏыъды опӏитӏиъ такэ̄. Опӏтӏчӏәс виргәм биврә̄с too уъпӏитӏиъкьи сәм


Сәнттӏуъ высмыъндэ.
Вит ми сә тӣыъды нэ̄чӏэ мә̄ттӣэ̄ вӣцӏәкьима?


Go to the top.
Бэ̄л


They should build a big river across America so you can go across it by boat. Building it would create a lot of jobs too


Ик сә мәфф уъпӏәдимитӏиъкьи би ниуъпӏәдимитӏиъкьи.
Can someone explain to me how this would physically be possible?


I may or may not steal that idea.
Shovel




Ми әттӏ вис сә о̄мэ, мин ю̄ътӏ ә... хин тӏуъччӏ, тӏӯъ иттӏәмай?
«Тӏӯъсы кӏуәсы гьу рэ̄быдсинтӏытӏмай нэ̄чӏэ?»


I'm alright today, but uh... pretty bored, you?
«Иккы догъджиъсы, гьу ыккы догъджиъсы.»


"Who are you and how did you get here?"


Мӣ екк хин индэытӏуъ, тӏӯъ мӯхор опӏитӏиъ!
"I'm a locksmith, and I'm a locksmith."


Don't pull the brush so hard, you'll get split ends!


[[File:Guimin cat in da hospital.png|thumb]]
Пӏырӣъмин джэррер вэ̄ма̄рэста̄нэ тӣтӏә сә о̄м гьу еркӏи мэ̄ иба̄тӏ кӏо гайджеэ̄сы гьу висвэ̄сы сә до̄тӏ еркӏи


Ыг уъм синтӏинтӏ зәмэ̄ нибаге, хвәз тӏэ̄кӏэ гьуджтӏынәш кәм ттӏәлтӏма?
Тӏӯъсы висвэ̄сы???


You've come at the perfect time, want some nettle soup?
Кат вэ̄ма̄рэста̄нэ


Катуъсы вэ̄ма̄рэста̄нэ Матвей


Бишэ̄кӏ митиъ кӏу шәкәргьӯтӏуъсы пӏә̄цӏ вит нэкӏытӏ лъэкк.
Бәлэ ми вӣцӏ тӏви мэ̄ иба̄тӏ пӏырәппыъвисы


My doctor said the diabetes is what made my foot numb.
Girlfriend had surgery at the hospital today and instead of her telling me that she's alive and okay she sends this instead


Are you okay???


Гьу сәэ нә̄ъ паймо̄з сәбрэ̄ше бытӏ, дэпӏынәсы 5 000 ₽иъсы са̄дэ̄.
Cat in da hospital


And here we have a nice silken robe, on sale for just 5000 rubles.
There's a cat in the hospital Matthew


Yes I know you've told me that's awesome


Кӏу кӏвапӏәсы тӏӯъми нисахавәсы э̄ррэ̄ тӏәм мацтӏәйгчӏа̄сәрыс тыринтӏ.


The fumes are bad for you because they contain carcinogens.
Иккы: гьәълкъэ̄с вәррә̄тиъ гьу ботыл митуътиъ пӏәшшӯрвӣ


Офицянтәсы: бә̄рг би рут?


Уссә сә двә̄чӏиррәкӏ екӏды кӏуисӣ ккӏутӏ?
Иккы, кӏо̄ш әдә̄нвӣ мәс ттӏилды ппӏавр бӣъды: вәрр угь пӏукӏсәр ттӏилды джо̄ш


Why listen to anything that hypocrite says?
Me: onion rings and a bottle of wine for the table


Waiter: white or red?


Иккы ря̄ӏсы гӯътӏкьи мин ю̄ътӏ иккы ниупӏтӏ ныроджәсы кӏыриъччэ̄.
Me, trying to impress my date: which ever onion the chef prefers


I may be a hypocrite, but that doesn't guarantee that I'm wrong.


'''Марр Ы̄ъйдыкӏ Гьәссә̄р''' (''Dasypeltis scabra''), гьӣсәртиъ Colubridae-итиъ, Ифрӣкъӣ Джәнӯб


Ыг чӏӯниъ сә вавжэ̄ дыкӏ ккӏыълэ бы̄ънтӏ, хишым сәтиъ э̄нкӏтӏгьэ.
''фотографи Cristian Schneider-ә̄ ''


When the horsefly bit the bull, he flew into a rage.
Кӏу гипӏсәринэ гӯъръыргис зитӏмай??? Ләзӣзәсы???


Доттагъ тӏӯъ иък сә '''Марр Ы̄ъйдыкӏ Гьәссә̄р''' тӣчӏәш ыъкӏэтӏиъ ''ытэ̄л''


Гӯ оленкэ̄с чӏәпәм биъцӏәм тиринтӏ гьу гынгын джӯълэ тыътӏ, пӏәччӏ дэжюр га̄йнтӏма кашэр?
'''Common Egg-Eating Snake''' (''Dasypeltis scabra''), family Colubridae, South Africa


Chevrotains have split hooves and chew cud, so are they technically kosher?
''photograph by Cristian Schneider''


What's in the little critter's mouth??? Is it tasty???


Вӣ моркъэ̄с ккӏоптӏчӏа̄ръӣ уъпӏәдмәнтӏиъ ю̄ътӏ нӯъ.
Bestie you will ''never'' guess what this '''Common Egg-Eating Snake''' is doing


We'll still need to get rid of the stumps with a mattock.


кӏуэ миръә̄ъдсы?


Ыг маррәс пӏэ̄т сәтиъ әдыъхатӏ.
Двә̄ туърппӏэ. Мы̄ъсә̄м сорчирәш тә̄тӏуъ лук са̄дэ̄.


A snake left its slough.
Кӏуәш.


Where is the bathroom at?


Ик тӏәгрум мустахт кьарәътиъ тӏыътӏ ю̄ътӏ.
Two doors down. Just be careful of the toilet rats.


I need a professional Kumyk translator.
The what.




Әруъш, мӣ луътфән кӏашырг икрэ̄быд би Къуцӣрэ̄быд ыъкӏтӏуъ.
Дуъгьо̄бвисы кӏуъмирә̄с-квартӏэ̄с кәчеәм лушшуъпӏэ игъсинтӏды диркӏрә


Arush, please don't swear in front of me or Qutsi.
Ик угьм давъэхъ тӏәш дӯтӏкьи


КӀУЪМИРСА̄ГЬИЪРЭ̄СЫ


Сәшшид Варъа̄мгъул кӏу динозаврэс нәккӏ быримчӏа̄ргръӣ бӣътӏә.
КӀУЪМИРСА̄ГЬИЪРЭ̄СЫ


According to Mr. Warhamghul, the dinosaurs were wiped out by an asteroid.
Mystery as female hammerhead sharks found gathering under full moon


I would give anything to be invited to this


Ыг двә̄ ттӏәлләм бягъакӏыргэ сидинтӏ.
SHARKWITCHES


Two starlings are perched on the railing.
SHARKWITCHES




Ыг Эзгиәсы пӏуъкьӏәсы висуъсы, ләзӣзырг митӏиъ такэ̄.
Нерәсы е висәсы биккӏла бәстӣ къӏоппӏыд


Ezgi's a good boy, he deserves a treat.
Биккӏла бәст гьу билетӏ сорчирбыд эвла пӏырого̄мытиъ э̄


Ынуъсы дуърро Taco Bell-ә̄ тӣтӏ мыдуъсы, та̄рӣхс диц ттитӏиъ


Ми тӏэ̄ хуй вәдырг нитӣды якӏатӏгьэ, ым сэпәнджэ̄с сәнтӏрә.
Nothing like a six pack after work


I told you not to get the cheap shit, we're having guests.
A six pack and one way ticket to the toilet eh


People who get diarrhea from Taco Bell are weak and history will forget them


Гӯ Зо̄пӏаркӏс Ростовеәс вӣърчӏа̄сәр бә̄рг дӯтӏә нӯъ.
==Longer translations==
Ик гьуъпп стэйкэ мәс ттӏытӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ ми вӣцӏухъ вӣ виъсэ̄ чӏиъгьинтӏуъ кӏо̄ш бы̄ънтӏ уът гӯъ биъцц.
Ик бәгьа̄р би тәъмтәъм стэйкэ ниттӏилтӏ гьәссә̄рэ̄, мин ю̄ътӏ кӏуъ кӏадг дуътӏ?
Э̄ррэ̄ чӏӯниъ сә кӏатӏ, гьуъж ыкӏуътиъ тытӏ.
Стэйк печӣъ динис гьәссә̄рӣъ упӏычӏ иттӏ пӏә̄въ, гьу иттӏ тэ̄нтӏ сәвс.
Сытӏинтӏуъинәд гьу диц ттытӏиъ.
Эв гьу вен такърӣбән сә̄ъппӏэ, иттӏинэды дә̄рӣтӏэ̄ хин пӏәччӏ гӯътӏ сәвс гьу вәгы нӯъ.
Сә пӏа̄ккӏ ынуъмәс быъкӏтӏәыъ.
Чам е̄мыргӣ тӏәш әмтӏуъухъ.
Сә тәъм ккӏэ̄тӏнитиъ тытӏ.
Ни ккӏэ̄тӏнәсы мәджә̄зӣәсы, ккӏэ̄тӏнәсы мәнуъшәсы гьәърфӣәсы гьашәсы.


I heard the Rostov Zoo just got a white spoonbill.
I love my steak, but I think we all just need to stop trying to make it taste good.
I usually don't season or flavor my steak, but who cares?
Because when this stuff gets going, it smells like dead bodies.
Cooking a steak with a normal home oven is disgusting, and it tends to be dry.
Let's go outside and forget about it.
After about an hour and a half, it's been in there for so long it is now dry and hard.
This is unfit for human consumption.
Let's just taste a little sliver of this.
That tastes like vomit.
Not figurative vomit, but actual literal human sick.


Ик мыг митиъ тэтӏиъинэ, гьу ӣсиъм кӏэнинтӏссә нэкӏинтӏабиъссә сә ыъкӏтӏ ым ттинтӏыъ.
Нуъ дыкӏинтӏуъ зэ̄т тӏәдуъсыгъ хин ттӏилтӏ.
Гьвә̄пӏ, гьвә̄пӏ.
Ытӏуъәд -


Ыг пӏандэ̄сы хин тиджэ̄сы пӏа̄ккӏ бамбукӏмәс тӏэ̄сә̄м та̄тӏ.
I'm gonna add my chicken, and if the bubbles start to form around it that means we're good to go.
 
Now realize that you put in way to much fucking oil.
The pandas are so cute when they eat their bamboo.
Okay, okay.
Remove -




Ыг пардайз тӏокӏигъ сәдэ километырәш такърӣбән тӏэ̄тӏ.
Чӏигьтӏуъ! Ынуъс Кьӏа̄тӏигъ Мытӏӣс сытӏәнцӏкьиды жаваб сә тӏырӣ суӏә̄линытиъ мэ̄ дӯтӏуъ, диркӏитӏиъчӏрэ̄ ракъис итӏэрисәс.
Суӏә̄линыс мэ̄ екӏэнтӏуъ, сакъӏ кьӏа̄тӏитиъ. Ми нииттӏ тӏыттӏ.
Чӏусы ниминсы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Ниминсы мәс Sir Lancelot of Camelot-әсы.
Чӏусы пуе̄сы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Вит Граал Чӏвәнтӏ диркӏтӏә.
Чӏусы рәнгэ̄сы кирмиънэ̄сы тӏо га̄йтӏ?
Кьә̄вкӏ.
Руктӏ. Синттӏуъдэ.
О̄, шукрән. Шукрән хин.
Гӯътӏ са̄д!
Чӏигьтӏуъ! Ынуъс Кьӏа̄тӏигъ Мытӏӣс сытӏәнцӏкьиды жаваб сә тӏырӣ суӏә̄линытиъ мэ̄ дӯтӏуъ, диркӏитӏиъчӏрэ̄ ракъис итӏэрисәс.
Суӏә̄линыс мэ̄ екӏэнтӏуъ, сакъӏ кьӏа̄тӏитиъ. Ми нииттӏ тӏыттӏ.
Чӏусы ниминсы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Sir Robin of Camelot-әсы.
Чӏусы пуе̄сы тӏо гӯътӏ?
Вит Граал Чӏвәнтӏ диркӏтӏә.
Чӏусы па̄йтәхтэ̄сы Әшшӯрә̄ёс га̄йтӏ?
Ми сә нивӣцӏ! А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄А̄!


About a kilometer that way there's an orchard along the road.
Stop! Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
 
Ask me the questions, bridge-keeper. I'm not afraid.
 
What is your name?
Ыг чикла̄чилис ттӏӣпӏә̄ уъпӏинтӏ мин ю̄ътӏ иккы тәмбәләсы цӏакъӏ вит нитӣчӏәш.
My name is Sir Lancelot of Camelot.
What is your quest?
To seek the Holy Grail.
What is your favorite color?
Blue.
Right. Off you go.
Oh, thank you. Thank you very much.
That's easy!
Stop! Who approaches the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
Ask me the questions, bridge-keeper. I'm not afraid.
What is your name?
Sir Robin of Camelot.
What is your quest?
To seek the Holy Grail.
What is the capital of Assyria?
I don't know that! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!


The wipers leave streaks but I'm too lazy to fix it.
===Ni̦xlo creation myth===
Бы̄ъмәсы гӯънтӏ пӏә̄вл, мугьӣът бурн имтӏә, чӏӯниъ сиъръ дӯтӏәды. Болъукӏәд вӣыънэ синтӏытӏуъпӏтӏэ, вӣрэ̄ 3 билёнэ̄, бы̄ъкьӏ пӏирвытиъ тынтӏды; эттэ̄лэ̄тиъ я̄вэ̄деәтиъ суълтӏос ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan-әш. Ӣхатӏ биъцӏ е̄н сытӏытӏ 3 иррэ̄ вид синтӏытӏдэцы. Билтӏ тӏәш нэкӏнинтӏ, вид ппӏыдиттӏды пылитӏэ̄с тектоническэ̄с, гьу буът упӏды. Әгәрчи буътнәс гайдж до̄нтӏ, тәттӣдэ̄сы тӏэ̄нтӏ. Ничӏигьытӏ нэкӏытӏ. 'Kꝛefrao, вэләм, сә диркӏнинтӏ, гьу вӣднинтӏухъ тӏэ̄инигъды. Ватӏәд, 'Ƕakꜥité, синтӏнинтӏ гьу ппӏәрэ̄с мугьӣътисиндэ ноесиндэ тынинтӏ, сиъръ тәъбӣъ бәвкӏтӏды сәми тӏэ̄ды. Мәнвис биврәм сә гьӣкьӏэсдэ ттӏилнинтӏ ттым, ӏәсәлә̄ф митиъ, гьу вит пӏә̄въкӏмә̄с эвеэс, ым jonskyo, варждэ сиъръ гьӣкьӏитиъ бо̄кӏтӏды, бы̄виныс кӏырәвтиъ ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan-әш, вит ппӏәр чӏигьды нэкӏды ттӏилнинтӏ. 'Kꝛefrao вӣыънэ тӏэ̄нинтӏ ттым, вит ым тӏокӏигъ машырис, гьу цә̄е̄с, сытӏнинтӏды. Әгәрчи тәълӣм сәтиъ тӏәйнтӏ, муджыр кӏо̄ш иъкъа̄б бы̄ънтӏды тӏэ̄рәыъндэ. Тӏәс, нӣъсәр 1578әш, вит ым сиъръ ни агъэ̄ми, гьу йәмиъм виъсэ̄с акӏытӏды сәппӏәдэ̄, дыкӏнинтӏ.


The world was barren, consumed by a violent ocean, when magick was given. It fell from the void above us, 3 billion years behind us, in the form of a boulder; a piece of the endless body of ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan. As it neared the water, it split and journeyed to 3 points. Its bodies grew, replacing the water to make the tectonic plates, and the land. Although the land brought life, it posed a threat. It did not stop growing. The 'Kꝛefrao, the wolves, saw this, and decided to intervene. They came from their realm, 'Ƕakꜥité, and carried the seeds into the new oceans, utilising the inherent magick to join them. They then placed many peoples onto these lands, our ancestors, and trained a select few, we the jonskyo, to use the land's magick, the streams of the blood of ꝗamuƛaqix́íaꞓan, to prevent growth of these seeds. The 'Kꝛefrao then ruled over us, guiding us down a path of peace, and protection. Although their teachings live, they were overthrown, by a criminal they had tried to punish. He, the leader of 1578, introduced us to uninhibited magick, and all the harm that followed.


Ккӏа сә гьӣкьӏәсы эттэ̄лэ̄сы Кӏэерәш Сәъфавӣс XVI къарнэ ӣттӏ.
===Long-term nuclear waste warning message===
Сә джа̄гсы сычӏәсы, гьу эттэ̄лэ̄сы ниъзэ̄с сычӏә̄м. Дыкӏтӏуъ!


In the 16th century this area was part of the Safavid Empire.
Вит сэ сычӏ синтӏчӏәсы гӯънтӏ гы̄руъсы нә̄ъм. Ы̄в сив тәссӣбәсы тӏы̄ътӏәсы диркӏнинтӏ.


Сә джа̄гсы ни джа̄гсы мигъисы. Тӣчӏ хин мигъ мытӏәд ниимтӏә сәэ̄. Хханер сәэ нитӏэ̄тӏ.


Санджа̄бэ̄с домбәм мигъэ̄с пӏыномеэ̄с кӏуэ биринтӏ?
Кӏуәсы тӏәсыэ гӯънтӏ къэрым гьу пӏә̄въ нә̄ъм. Сә сычӏәсы бӯчерәсы къэрымис.


Why do squirrels have big fluffy tails?
Къэрым джа̄гэ эвӣънэ тӏыътӏ. Мичиндэ акӏтӏ, мич къэрымтиъ сәэ, мигъмисәс гьу бы̄ъкьӏәш эвӣънә̄м, гьу вӣуъпӏэ, тӏэ̄тӏ.


Къэрым тӏыътӏ нӯъ, зәмэ̄ уъсәм, тӏәсыэ̄ нә̄ъс.


Ттӏӣпӏ A сәъттинигъ B джа̄гэ кӏуисәс сыттӏ?
Къэрымсы суълтӏвӣ, вит акӏтӏыъ мир.


At what point does line A intersect with plane B?
Бы̄ъкьӏәсы къэрымис кьӏӯтӏәсы жигырмисәс.


Къэрым мәън сә джа̄гӣ хин нэкӏссәды ыъхтӏә мо̄ч эвэ̄ мә̄ттӣэ̄. Сә джа̄г тыътӏуъ ккӏы гьу ни гьиътӏ такэ̄.


Гӯ кӏо̄ә̄с дәппә̄гъ ниэ̄нкӏтӏ нӯъ, пӏәччӏ тӏэ̄мс ттӏибисиныс нойәм упӏчӏрэ̄ ю̄ътӏ.
This place is a message, and part of a system of messages. Pay attention to it!


The hides hadn't yet tanned, so they had to wait to make new boots.
Sending this message was important to us. We considered ourselves to be a powerful culture.


This place is not a place of honor. No highly esteemed deed is commemorated here. Nothing valued is here.


Малӯън, ик тякӏ митиъ кӏудэ ллытӏ?
What is here was dangerous and repulsive to us. This message is a warning about danger.


Dammit, where'd I put my shoehorn?
The danger is in a particular location. It increases towards a center, the center of danger is here, of a particular size and shape, and below us.


The danger is still present, in your time, as it was in ours.


Ыг тӏәм бисквим ппӏыминэ сә̄ъәд кӏанинтӏ.
The danger is to the body, and it can kill.


He put the cookies in the oven an hour ago.
The form of the danger is an emanation of energy.


The danger is unleashed only if you substantially disturb this place physically. This place is best shunned and left uninhabited.


Ми бакаләе сәнтӏытӏ сон, ыг бәгь бананытиъ накӏытӏ.
===Translations of Yambot text===
====Dillon====
Вит ми дӯъвицӏ бәзэ мисә̄л луъптӏымитиъ мәгьиъ сулә̄сӣәм тӣтӏиъ дыруъвишэ


I went to the grocery store yesterday, the price of bananas went up.
Sorta reminds me of my favorite example of tri-roots done right




Фашистыс виъсәм нэкӏәнтӏиъкьи мир.
Пӏардон шумә ми випӏыр синттӏкьи сә̄ъмэ̄, оккӏсы сәмитиъ Sweet & Smokey сытӏа̄ ыъттӏ


Death to all fascists.
Sorry if I consonantly jiggle my eyes are real Sweet & Smokey




Малӯън, ик диц тӏәшэ̄с къэнәе̄с та̄тӏ та̄тӏ.
Гьу кӏосы ынуъсы бәч тӏәри гӯътӏмай гьу кӏосы bogo виъкӏпӏәтӏӣс гӯътӏмай?


Damn, I keep forgetting about this channel.
And who's the richest person and what’s a chief bogo?




Ыг ръӯикӏвәсы кәм исинтӏкьи хин бурн, ым сәэ дәркӏинтӏчӏсы.
Misread asemic and I think about it once but didn't see the Í


Some hippos can be very violent, as we see here.
Ик вә̄нд asemic-э дәркӏытӏ ныроджэ̄ гьу ик тӏәш вӣцӏухъ эвэ̄ мин ю̄ътӏ ик Í нидыкӏытӏ


====Eden====
Нуукәс ракъ е мигъ ынкӏэрутивинэ дӯтӏәссәйә̄й аназэ̄


Ыг Мэруж уккӏӣ мэ̄ кӏорчымигъ тӣнтӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ ик мәън тӏәттиъ тӏәш ивӣцӏ.
what if Nuuk suddenly gains a larger number in society


Meruzh winked at me from across the pub, but I don't know what he meant by it.


Мадгья-Прадэшәсы дыквэ̄сы мя̄нджӣс га̄йтӏыъкьи


Гьар Быдӣӣъ хвәз ю̄ъситиъ гәзәрис би кӏартӏофиләш ттӏәлтӏды шумә ыъкӏтӏуъ.
Madhya Pradesh could be a lingua franca


Ask Bydi if he wants carrot soup or potato soup.


Тӏви тә̄тӏ руӏиэ̄сыэ̄ бӯчилэ̄сы, мин ю̄ътӏ Далмациәд сыттӏ


А̄ппӏ тиртӏуъ шумэ̄, би тӏӯъ ә̄шо̄ икӏвэ ттӏытӏкьи.
You act like a lucid dream, but it comes from Dalmatia


Hold the reins steady, or you'll confuse the horse.
====Fyorr====
Ми вӣцӏ йәс Эносиъсы га̄йтӏ?


I know what Enosis is?


Ик хъинкӏалыс даттӏа̄ндэ ттӏынинтӏ гьу уъртӏ әдсәнтӏытӏ пӏӯв сә̄нӣэ̄, ттым двиъчӏ сә̄нӣэ̄ ик уъртӏ двиъсәнттӏ ни хъинкӏал итӏэр буъкк хәзэ̄ми милиътӏкъарӏэ̄с диркӏды.


One moment I put the hingalsh on the windowsill and turn around, the next I turn back to see no hingalsh but a goat with pumpkin on its fur.
Э̄ 3:30 такърӣбән кӏэ


So it's like 3:30 here


Подкәст дыкӏтӏуъ гьәфтэ двитӏӣъэ̄, сәэ мавдӯъсы тӏэ̄лерәш нә̄ъм Ихтилә̄линсы Туркэ̄м Тӏәрнә̄м гьу синтӏухъиндэчӏсы До̄лэ̄с Уъсма̄неэ̄с гӯънтӏиъ.
====Jazmin====
Гӣнттәсы нигӯътӏкьи


Tune into the podcast next week, when the topic of our episode will be the Young Turk Revolution and the dissolution of the Ottoman Empire.
Maybe it's not a baby


====Kevin====
Дӯъыъкӏнинтӏ ахӣран, рэ̄кӏы итӏиъ лмао


Ик әйнәк митиъ икми нибәртӏ пӏәччӏ эвмәс ю̄ъсәд вә̄нд менюӣ якӏтӏуъ.
They finally responded to what a legacy lmao


I don't have my glasses on me so can one of you read out the menu?


Пӏортӏугалск ниминтӏ ю̄ътӏ диркӏгьэ двә̄э̄


Гӯ тӏәсы о̄минсы ыъттӏ хин сәвс, дживанс милтырг мэ̄ бӣънтӏ нӯъ.
don't have to listen to Portuguese again though


It must be especially dry today, the couch just shocked me.


Джәзырвис тӏырӣ-сә̄ъмиътиъ мәънинӣ бәвгэнтӏ лә̄ъл


Ыг сәкт кӏэ̄ртиъ тӏо хусырӣъ опӏтӏә; записач ккӏа тӏӯъ сигар инэйәмтӏ та̄нтӏ, тӏӯъ вит акӏитӏиъ ю̄ътӏ тӏиркӏтӏ пӏы хвәз двиъдиркӏчӏэ икдэ би гима̄хдэ ниттӏәлтӏссә.
maybe it uses tricon roots for meaning


Your heart attack was caused by a blood clot; your records say you smoke, that needs to change if you don't soon want another visit to me or your grave.


Гӯътӏ дуъчч нӣш сә̄ъӏиъмәс дӯ мин ю̄ътӏ ни П


Гӯ тӏәм кӏэссинер еккинэ диркӏытӏ сэ̄ гъәдэ̄ пӏәччӏ бодж ыъсәнцӏэ̄тиъ о̄мигъ әгәсигъ тә̄тӏ накӏтӏ, вин ма̄шӣнӣъ ләбэ̄с зыбирижэниэ̄биъ нә̄ъм мукӏэ ниуъпӏитӏиъкьи.
It’s hard to represent vowels but no p


He found a grey hair in his comb this morning so he's been in an existential panic off and on all day, hopefully he doesn't spend our savings on a sports car tomorrow.


Ми очиричинэ тӏитӏыътӏ, къадыр тӏвис тиртӏ


Гьәърӣфыс кәм Товарищ Сааховдэ әлутэ гьу футболӣ синтӏәнтӏиъ нокӏтӏэ̄, тӏӯъ нә̄ъми синтӏитӏиъмай би гӯътӏиъмай мәшгъӯл?
I've been in line, it has a good amount


Some coworkers are going to Товарищ Саахов tonight for beers and football, are you coming with or are you busy?


ACB хин виъды̄нәсыъ


Свичир ыъндэбәвкӏтӏчӏэ ыъттӏмай тӏипӏ эвпӏә̄въкӏ?
ACB is so comprehensible


Isn't it a bit warm to be wearing a sweater?
====Mish====
Ыыы кӏом эвикӏ фиъләсы


uhhh just when a verb


Ик, Зә̄мә̄ччӏэ̄ Васыфкӏырс, сә чӏиръырг Васыфӣ Арахгъулӣъ виркӏтӏ; ми ю̄ъс тӏотӏэ биврэс дык гӯйминтиъ нивӣдыъкьичӏәш вэцӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ ик вәл кӏә̄мими пӏыътӏръис мәс нипӏитт дыквэхъ Рӯсиэ̄с нибӣъды имытӏ.


This eulogy by me, Zamacch Wasyfkyr, is dedicated to Wasyf Arakhghul; I know many of you in the audience may not speak Guimin, but I chose by my father's wishes not to write it in Russian.
Аккю̄тәсы гьудуләсы: мытӏиъсы пӏӯв ццӏамәс ветнамскиъсы


friendly ghost: my first thought vietnamese


Бәлэ ыг сә пырайгрывачил бәлккӯъттӏ двиъбэ̄тӏ двиъбэ̄тӏ тэ̄нтӏ иначӏ, вәт әлил синттӏуъухъ са̄дэ̄ гӯъды вис.


Yeah that piece of shit record player gets stuck repeating a lot, just adjust the needle and it'll be fine.
Акӏутӏэ̄с уттэ еркӏи тӏәмӣ гьәссә̄рэ


acutes for length instead of the ordinary


Ик ничӏ ка̄гъитиъ би итӏэр тӏәмӣ нипӏиттәш номирис мәс дыкӏитӏиъ имды, уъртӏ быдсәнттӏәкьи зәмэ̄ угь.


I'll find a piece of paper or something to write my number on, feel free to call anytime.
Ынвис интиъсәр тирытӏма тӏәсы мистерәсы иттӏ са̄дэ̄ итӏэрэ̄ D&Dәми отростокэ синхэ?? Ми вэцӏухъ??


did people expect he is just mister but with dnd at the alveolar ridge?? i think??


Тӏӯъ дуракӏ Уъсма̄нми тӣтӏиъссә мӣ дәъякъ гьарацытиъ тӏәминдэ упӏтӏуъ, ыг сӯъюъс фа̄йшэ̄с гъәшш бы̄ътӏ та̄тӏ.


If you ever play Durak with Osman don't bet money on it, the son of a bitch cheats.
Э̄ бэ̄ръ руктӏ ик вӣцӏухъ ниъзэ̄сы цӏырәйъттәсы нигӯътӏссә сәмәсы би адуъкӏәсы, пӏәччӏ тӏәм сӯърмә̄с нэкӏинтӏ


yea tbh i think the ideal system would be neither same or different, so that becomes the formal ones


О̄ тӏви виъсмисәс ппӏыдкӏукӏтӏгьэ дуъсыгъэ̄, э̄н сә̄нӣигъ тыътӏуъухъ ик кад къагьуътиъ тӏэ̄ дӯды снитӏцы.


Oh you worry about everyone too much, relax for a bit while I get you a cup of coffee.
Бәлэ, ынвис трансгендерәм дык тәъбӣъэ̄ эвӣънэ̄ угь ба̄тӏәд?


Yes, trans people being against any specific natlang?


Ми мытӏәд ракъинӣ чилифонәш имды вэцӏухъ, набирач быъкӏтӏуъ сә 872, 3- ни, минтӏуъ.


I think I remember the phone number, dial 872, 3- no, wait.
Ик гьәвә̄ӏ во̄мтӏ виъсэ̄


i always have been showing off


Ик тӏаблэтӏкӏэ̄с мелатонинитиъ чӏӯниъ вайл ттӏилды тита̄тӏә̄й суъп сәттӏә̄й нӯъ.


If I'd taken melatonin when I was planning to I'd be sleeping now.
Эв сә нәвъытиъ фонэ ботә̄мэ мәс гӯънтӏкьи мо̄н


one of these types in the background of my bots could be fun


Джо̄ттӏ, тӏӯъ дәккӏән пӏы̄инигъ имцы, мадзанг, кӏэкӏикӏ, мил ражиътиъ нә̄с е мигъә̄с мәнтӏиъыъма?


Dear, while you're out shopping in the city, can you get us more oregano, thyme, and garlic powder?
Тӣчӏәсы ыджебыд ни са̄дэ̄, сәм тты̄нәсыъчӏәсы сӯърнәвъ ынуъмәс тырансгендерәмәс гӯътӏчӏәш мин ю̄ътӏ пӏӣм би эг мэ̄ ллытӏ гьәссә̄рэ̄


It’s just not using that as justification, but also the possibility that there’s a stereotype for trans people but they’ve actually hurt me or offended me


Ыг тӏви игзамәд римытӏ фәшил пӏәччӏ руъхс ра̄нәнэ̄тиъ тӏэ̄ нидо̄тӏыъ, мин ю̄ътӏ тӏӯъ кӏо̄ш двиъбы̄ъйтӏиъыъ ттымппӏыд.
====Saint====
Ик гьар гьӣкьӏитиъ е мигъәтиъ ыъкӏатӏ пӏы сә о̄мэ̄, бы̄ъминсы бордж эвмәтиъ тӏәмӣ тытӏ


You failed the test so we can't give you a driving license, but you can try again later.
Today I almost just asked for a larger area, like the world owes him something


=Original texts=
==Single sentences==
Ыг икӏвәс тӏәмӣ мужыкӏэ чӏәп бӣънтӏ хин.


Кӏу виргәс миъгь нитытӏуъ мин ю̄ътӏ джәримэ̄сы мя̄нджӣс джуъгьэ̄сы 6%әсы.
The horse kicked the shit out of that dude.


The job doesn't come with a salary but the standard commission is 6%.


Ыг икӏвәс тӏәмӣ мужыкӏэ чӏәп бӣънтӏ.


Кӏо Нӯрс комисён ботыләд угь вин дӯды йәмтӏ, пӏәччӏ ю̄ъс вин уъпӏитӏиъссә тӏә̄мигъ уъпӏтӏуъ.
The horse kicked that dude.


Noor makes commission on every bottle she sells, so if you're going to buy it buy it from her.


Сәнттӏуъ высмыъндэ хин.


Вӣ гъё̄м сыменэсигъ лоришэ̄сы тита̄тӏ ыг ниәттыәсы, ик гьәмәтӏ тӏӯъ суъп ниттӏилтӏчӏэ джо̄ш вә̄мтӏ.
Go all the way to the top.


We've worked shifts as nurses and it isn't easy, I hope you don't like sleep.


Сәнттӏуъ высмыъндэ.


Ягья вит ми виъсмисӣ икми кӏыъркӏыъерә̄м вӣдытӏ, угьмәс жаваб суӏә̄лнӣ тӏо бэ̄тӏыъссә тӏәм тэ̄нтӏссә.
Go to the top.


Yahya taught me everything I know about smithing, if anyone can answer your question it's him.


Ик сә мәфф уъпӏәдимитӏиъкьи би ниуъпӏәдимитӏиъкьи.


Футболчӏа̄сәр кирмиънәс мәс кӯълъ Акиллэ̄стиъ сәтиъ мытӏ руън нӯъ, ахъ.
I may or may not steal that idea.


My favorite footballer just tore his Achilles tendon, ouch.


Ми әттӏ вис сә о̄мэ, мин ю̄ътӏ ә... хин тӏуъччӏ, тӏӯъ иттӏәмай?


Ра̄нәнэ̄ тәкъа̄з кьӏәвыс дуърәчӏитиъ иба̄тӏ то̄къӣфрэ̄ тӏәш, кӏу муъӏа̄фәсы икӏ бәвгчӏәд мәттӏәсәд руъхсэ̄ми ра̄нәнэ̄с мәттӏэ̄ми ничӏисы ка̄гъәш «i can drive lit gang» екӏды
I'm alright today, but uh... pretty bored, you?


The driver was demanding for his keys back before he was arrested, claiming to be exempt from drunk driving with a drunk driving certificate that was a piece of paper that read "i can drive lit gang"


Мӣ екк хин индэытӏуъ, тӏӯъ мӯхор опӏитӏиъ!


Ыг пырезидент олигархәми сидинтӏ олур е хэнэ̄ш о̄мо̄м нер вит ничӏигьды гы̄рэ̄, кӏу сәмисы Америкэ.
Don't pull the brush so hard, you'll get split ends!


The president and his oligarchs are ruling with more open evil by the day and nothing's being substantially done about it, I hear it's the same in America.


Ыг уъм синтӏинтӏ зәмэ̄ нибаге, хвәз тӏэ̄кӏэ гьуджтӏынәш кәм ттӏәлтӏма?


Ниъза̄м ной тӏымәд мӣнис нэкӏитӏиъ рог, ик насӣъгь джа̄г итӏэр ссы̄нәс би итӏэрм кӏвә̄н тӏвитиъ бырәнцӏәш екӏчӏ до̄тӏ.
You've come at the perfect time, want some nettle soup?


The new policy will go into effect at the end of the month, I suggest finding either somewhere else to live or someone else to take care of your dog.


Бишэ̄кӏ митиъ кӏу шәкәргьӯтӏуъсы пӏә̄цӏ вит нэкӏытӏ лъэкк.


Ик чай воркӏтӏкьи, мин ю̄ътӏ сизгэдж хин никкӏутӏгьэыъ.
My doctor said the diabetes is what made my foot numb.


I was going to make some tea, but I can't find the strainer anywhere.


Гьу сәэ нә̄ъ паймо̄з сәбрэ̄ше бытӏ, дэпӏынәсы 5 000 ₽иъсы са̄дэ̄.


Вӣ зо̄пӏаркӏдэ фотоэ̄с сиънкэсәд гьу зебырэ̄сәд упӏды синтӏәнтӏиъкьима?
And here we have a nice silken robe, on sale for just 5000 rubles.


Can we go to the zoo to take pictures of the leopards and zebras?


Кӏу кӏвапӏәсы тӏӯъми нисахавәсы э̄ррэ̄ тӏәм мацтӏәйгчӏа̄сәрыс тыринтӏ.


Ыг матӏор пәнджәрэ̄тиъ ппӏыдримтӏә ю̄ътӏ, гьу нә̄ъ эттэ̄л руктӏ атылеинэ нитытӏ, ик гьар ыъкӏэтӏиъ кьима нӯъ?
The fumes are bad for you because they contain carcinogens.


Looks like the window motor needs to be replaced, but we don't have the right part in the shop, want me to order it now?


Уссә сә двә̄чӏиррәкӏ екӏды кӏуисӣ ккӏутӏ?


Ми кӏуэ тӏӯъ зәм тӏәминэ кӏурсинэ әдӣхатӏ нивӣцӏ сә тӏви нерәш ниекӏатӏ цӏә̄ттӏ ппё.
Why listen to anything that hypocrite says?


I don't know why you wasted time on that class when clearly it didn't teach you anything.


Иккы ря̄ӏсы гӯътӏкьи мин ю̄ътӏ иккы ниупӏтӏ ныроджәсы кӏыриъччэ̄.


Гӯкьӏэ мӣ вэ̄чӏ бы̄ътӏуъ, сә пӏәвиъцӏуъ са̄дэ̄, гӯ тӏәсы хырччанәсы э̄ррэ̄ анккьӏ гьу мух сәтиъ ырә бырэдж.
I may be a hypocrite, but that doesn't guarantee that I'm wrong.


Don't bother arguing and just ignore him, he's in a bad mood because his hours and pay got reduced.


Ыг чӏӯниъ сә вавжэ̄ дыкӏ ккӏыълэ бы̄ънтӏ, хишым сәтиъ э̄нкӏтӏгьэ.


Ыг тӏәмс каркарыс лулыргэ̄м пыластикис гьу кӏәчӏәпӏвә̄м иппэнтӏкьи, гьашерәми, ми ниукӏокӏтӏ бӯч.
When the horsefly bit the bull, he flew into a rage.


They were shouting something about plastic straws and turtles I think, honestly I wasn't paying attention.


Гӯ оленкэ̄с чӏәпәм биъцӏәм тиринтӏ гьу гынгын джӯълэ тыътӏ, пӏәччӏ дэжюр га̄йнтӏма кашэр?


Ик вә̄нд китә̄бинӣ дарсис дәркӏытӏ кӏу я̄къӯтэ̄сы гьу шапюлэ̄сы гьашерәми нәвъсы ыъкӏмнис хханәш сәмәсы багэ̄ми итӏэрэ̄ми.
Chevrotains have split hooves and chew cud, so are they technically kosher?


I read in a textbook that rubies and sapphires are actually the same kind of gem with different impurities.


Вӣ моркъэ̄с ккӏоптӏчӏа̄ръӣ уъпӏәдмәнтӏиъ ю̄ътӏ нӯъ.


Шутӏкӏэ̄сы дыквэхъ Англиэ̄с нимы баскетболчӏа̄ръис гьуцӏро̄әш LeBron James гьу баръӣс «йәппӏ голл быронзэ̄тиъ» о̄с ккӏӯнәс пӏы га̄йтӏ.
We'll still need to get rid of the stumps with a mattock.


The joke is that in English the name of the famous basketball player LeBron James and the words for "bronzen jade" sound similar.


Ыг маррәс пӏэ̄т сәтиъ әдыъхатӏ.


Цӏаттӏ хин двиъбыъга̄нәсыъ сәнчӏ тӏәд мәъдинәд ытӏә мӣлә̄дрэ̄ быъкӏтӏәды нӯъ о̄мэ̄.
A snake left its slough.


Э̄ тӏви кӏу чӏӯниъ кӏа̄нәс цӏаттӏис 78 Volvo-инэ пӏыгъанәсинэ мәс я̄рукъ нэкӏды чӏӯниъ нәккӏ джонтӏӣъ кӏа̄нәш бӣъды Ea-nāṣir-әсы найдеәсы двиъгӯънинтӏ гьашэ̄? Сӯъй фа̄йшэ̄тиъ.


Copper is so recyclable that stuff that was mined pre BC is still being used today.
Ик тӏәгрум мустахт кьарәътиъ тӏыътӏ ю̄ътӏ.


So what you're telling me is that when the copper head in my old 78 Volvo cracked when it blew the head gasket it was actually Ea-nāṣir's fault again? That son of a bitch.
I need a professional Kumyk translator.




Ик званич муъгьа̄сибӣ мәс ым мәӏзӯнӣәд синтӏчӏппӏәд ыъкӏэтӏиъ такэ̄.
Әруъш, мӣ луътфән кӏашырг икрэ̄быд би Къуцӣрэ̄быд ыъкӏтӏуъ.


I should call my accountant once we're back from vacation.
Arush, please don't swear in front of me or Qutsi.




Гӯ дакьчӏа̄сәр дэпӏынәм кӏарамелӣтиъ гьу ирисытиъ ттӏилинтӏ, тӏви лэфт тӏӯъми имды синтӏигъцы мэкӏтӏэбппӏээ̄ гӯътӏиъкьи вис.
Сәшшид Варъа̄мгъул кӏу динозаврэс нәккӏ быримчӏа̄ргръӣ бӣътӏә.


The confectioner has a sale on caramel and fudge, it might be worth bringing change for when you walk by him after school.
According to Mr. Warhamghul, the dinosaurs were wiped out by an asteroid.




Йырсы уът кӏэ̄р сив ккӏонцӏисы бэкярмәс тӏэ̄мәс диндэ ппа̄нәс ппа̄нәс гӯътӏ.
Ыг двә̄ ттӏәлләм бягъакӏыргэ сидинтӏ.


It's a traditional courtship song often sung by bachelors on their way home.
Two starlings are perched on the railing.




Тӏә̄м висм тәъминӣ кәм, ик нивиъцӏ кӏыриъччэ̄, нәгнә̄м йәвисәс нитэ̄нтӏә.
Ыг Эзгиәсы пӏуъкьӏәсы висуъсы, ләзӣзырг митӏиъ такэ̄.


There's something about the taste of barley bread that she doesn't like, I'm not sure what it is.
Ezgi's a good boy, he deserves a treat.




Ик сә пӏәшшӯр ё̄итиъ пӏыгъан мәзә̄дӣъ успрэ̄д мытӏ бәстигъэ̄, тӏӯъ игъсинтӏди нэкӏды двитӏӣъэ̄ митӏиъкьи.
Ми тӏэ̄ хуй вәдырг нитӣды якӏатӏгьэ, ым сэпәнджэ̄с сәнтӏрә.


I got this worn out yew table at an auction last week as part of a package deal, you can take it next time you stop by.
I told you not to get the cheap shit, we're having guests.




Бы̄ъкьӏәш биъхходисәс артинкбыд вӣдухъчӏрэ̄, губа̄р ккӏиккьӏипэ̄тиъ ё̄рӣ гӯъбыдчӏәсы бинкуъсы ё̄гуъсы дэбы̄ътӏуъ.
Гӯ Зо̄пӏаркӏс Ростовеәс вӣърчӏа̄сәр бә̄рг дӯтӏә нӯъ.


Before you worry about the exact shape of the end product, pound the steel billet out on the anvil until it has a uniform thickness.
I heard the Rostov Zoo just got a white spoonbill.




Тӏви мытӏәд вӣ кьы̄тэ̄с аккю̄тәмтиъ харэкӏрэ̄ биппэнтӏзәмчӏә̄м ибәйнтӏ нукӏтӏигъ хин әмтӏма?
Ыг пӏандэ̄сы хин тиджэ̄сы пӏа̄ккӏ бамбукӏмәс тӏэ̄сә̄м та̄тӏ.


Do you remember when we used to take turns telling ghost stories by the campfire way too late into the night?
The pandas are so cute when they eat their bamboo.




Къутиъс двә̄ виъгьы дикӏы атӏашыс мэ̄ тынтӏ двә̄ виъгьы нон имцы ю̄ътӏ, ик пәррикъ мацордӣъ имитӏиъмай эв хин атӏаш гӯъә̄йды ю̄ътӏ ды̄ъ әдӣхэтӏиъмай?
Ыг пардайз тӏокӏигъ сәдэ километырәш такърӣбән тӏэ̄тӏ.


The box had fifty paperclips but I only needed forty-nine, should I save the last one on the off chance I'll need just one paperclip at some point or should I throw it away?
About a kilometer that way there's an orchard along the road.




Ми би джудзӣъ дәркӏтӏ гьу гьәмәтӏ сәнчӏ бивр дыкӏәнтӏиъчӏәш эхэтӏиъ, а̄гъ мукӏэ, сәмкӏӯъ вис гьәфтэ, пӏыъкчӏ йә̄рэ гаютӏиъкьи.
Ыг чикла̄чилис ттӏӣпӏә̄ уъпӏинтӏ мин ю̄ътӏ иккы тәмбәләсы цӏакъӏ вит нитӣчӏәш.


I look at myself in the mirror and hope to see many things, tomorrow a homeowner, next week a good neighbor, next year maybe a wife.
The wipers leave streaks but I'm too lazy to fix it.




Гӯ гьэ̄рӣэ̄сы иъркъми кирмиъними бо̄шшә̄м ынуъмәс гьәъсә̄сӣеәмәс миләд дӯнтӏчӏәмтиъ әсинтӏ.
Ккӏа сә гьӣкьӏәсы эттэ̄лэ̄сы Кӏэерәш Сәъфавӣс XVI къарнэ ӣттӏ.


I've heard irises are one of the best kinds of flowers to get people who are allergic to pollen.
In the 16th century this area was part of the Safavid Empire.




Мигъер виъсәмтиъ кӏирръә̄м ӏинсә̄нмәс истисынэ̄сы гы̄рвэ̄сы энтвидачиъсы нигӯътӏ къэрыме.
Санджа̄бэ̄с домбәм мигъэ̄с пӏыномеэ̄с кӏуэ биринтӏ?


Most spiders' venoms aren't dangerous to humans, a notable exception being black widows.
Why do squirrels have big fluffy tails?




Ыг вӣцӏ гар, мин ю̄ътӏ кӏу сәрэ̄ерәсы эстетикэ̄сы пӏалтӏ пӏыгъан голл сәтиъ ниимыъды ной вэ̄ыъндэбыъкӏтӏ.
Ттӏӣпӏ A сәъттинигъ B джа̄гэ кӏуисәс сыттӏ?


He knows it's cold out, but apparently that's outweighed by aesthetics since he refuses to wear his old green coat when we can't afford a new one.
At what point does line A intersect with plane B?




Бибәшшэ̄д ик СМС ся̄гь әдсәнтӏытӏчӏрэ̄ упӏды еркӏи бы̄ътӏ нӯъ, ыг вӣ бәццарэ̄с, ӯныс, ы̄ъйәм ба̄за̄рэхъ имцы быринтӏ вә̄й.
Гӯ кӏо̄ә̄с дәппә̄гъ ниэ̄нкӏтӏ нӯъ, пӏәччӏ тӏэ̄мс ттӏибисиныс нойәм упӏчӏрэ̄ ю̄ътӏ.


Sorry for texting now instead of making a list before you left, but while you're at the market, we're running low on peppers, flour, and eggs.
The hides hadn't yet tanned, so they had to wait to make new boots.




Тӏӯъ къӏэн би виъз мәссәлэ̄сы екӏды шшошш бӣъцы ниәттӏ мин ю̄ътӏ Дорожнаяәсы вәләсы къӏэнисәс бәч висуъсы нигӯътӏкьи.
Малӯън, ик тякӏ митиъ кӏудэ ллытӏ?


It's not a problem that you sing or whistle when you're sweeping, but Дорожная may not be the best choice of song.
Dammit, where'd I put my shoehorn?




Ик сә гикь кӏо̄ш барбекюӣ гьашисӣ гьвинабисӣ упӏды бӣъчӏэ мытӏ чӏӯниъ доттагъыс Америкеәм митиъ дэсинтӏды, кӏу мин ю̄ътӏ пӏэкк тӣчӏәс тӏәшә̄м гух виръбыд әвшбыд уъпӏытӏ нӯъ.
Ыг тӏәм бисквим ппӏыминэ сә̄ъәд кӏанинтӏ.


I got this garlic string to try to make an authentic sweet barbecue when my American buddies visit, but their flight was just postponed to early spring.
He put the cookies in the oven an hour ago.




Пӏырӣъмин мәс тарӣф ныроджерәсы гьиджә̄ӏис «да̄р» милзәмэ̄ми «да̄рч» тирды дәркӏытӏ жакъ, гьу ик мәфф ах сытрӣмӣ сәм ттӏилитӏиъчӏәтиъ пӏокӏтӏ жакъ эппӏэ̄ вӣцӏ.
Ми бакаләе сәнтӏытӏ сон, ыг бәгь бананытиъ накӏытӏ.


My partner saw a recipe today that had "gunpowder" in the ingredients as a typo of "cinnamon," and I have a terrible idea for what I'm going to cook on our stream later today.
I went to the grocery store yesterday, the price of bananas went up.




Ым е̄нәсы Унсоколодэ сәнчӏэ̄с сӯъсӣъ игъдӯды тӏукӏисы ивэдинтӏухъ, бәлк жәнгтиъ митиъ шәдэ сәэ пырём нидиркӏды акӏытӏчӏбыд мир, гьу афтӏастӏопӏппӏэ сәбыд жул игъӣхухъкьиды кор дыкӏнинтӏ.
Фашистыс виъсәм нэкӏәнтӏиъкьи мир.


We thought it'd be a quick trip to Untsukul to drop stuff off for grandma, until our hunk of rust died in the mountains where we couldn't get signal, and we noticed after hitchhiking the rest of the way that we must've lost the broom somewhere along the way.
Death to all fascists.




Вайл сэ̄ зэ̄нд ккӏы упӏды ной вит джискачэкӏ нэкӏды ттӏытӏ; ккӏо̄ гьу ракъ со эвеэ̄с виргәсы хин ю̄ътӏисы дәркӏрә.
Малӯън, ик диц тӏәшэ̄с къэнәе̄с та̄тӏ та̄тӏ.


There are plans to renovate this condemned prison and turn it into a nightclub; the front and left side in particular look like they'll need a lot of work.
Damn, I keep forgetting about this channel.




Ми әълӣлмитми ма̄кисәс кәм тӏыънәнцӏ, гьукӯмэ̄ кӏадг ы̄витиъ хуйсы хин дӯды чӏиъгьытӏ ппёэ̄, чӏӯниъ сә̄нӣбыд нә̄ъсы ӏә̄лэ̄сы вит нэкӏчӏәш мир тӣды чӏигьды.
Ыг ръӯикӏвәсы кәм исинтӏкьи хин бурн, ым сәэ дәркӏинтӏчӏсы.


Meeting some of my fellow casualties from the war, it's clear the government stopped giving a single shit about us the moment we stopped being a tool for murder.
Some hippos can be very violent, as we see here.




Пӏырәппыъуъсы виъсэ̄ мигъерәм сәэ кӏокӏунтӏчӏәсы, мин ю̄ътӏ сәм кьӏачӏәсы эвпӏә̄въкӏ ик постппӏыд Лацину-әш диркӏды
Ыг Мэруж уккӏӣ мэ̄ кӏорчымигъ тӣнтӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ ик мәън тӏәттиъ тӏәш ивӣцӏ.


It's always great to see more here, but also kinda funny that I saw this right after the Latsinu post
Meruzh winked at me from across the pub, but I don't know what he meant by it.




Ик кӏокӏтӏ апӏтӏ банджарәм ареинэ тӏо ё̄минсы руктӏәсы нэкӏды гьа̄дэсэ̄ са̄дэ̄ гьиджә̄ӏ «Къвичэ̄сы Уъсма̄нгъулсы кьӏэхъчӏа̄сысы» ыънәддиркӏды бӣънтӏ нибагеэ̄.
Гьар Быдӣӣъ хвәз ю̄ъситиъ гәзәрис би кӏартӏофиләш ттӏәлтӏды шумә ыъкӏтӏуъ.


I find it unlikely that the herbs in your field just accidentally grew in the right pattern to perfectly spell "Qwich Usmanghul is an asshole" when seen from above.
Ask Bydi if he wants carrot soup or potato soup.




Чӏӯниъ тӣды нер итӏэрэ̄ кьӏӯтӏ о̄мигъ битӏонӣ бо̄дэ сә ттымнис офисис дӯды, кӏадг биъхходерәш акӏтӏәчӏәсы чӏӯ мух свирхурочәш акӏтӏәчӏәсы нэкӏтӏ тӏиркӏтӏ.
А̄ппӏ тиртӏуъ шумэ̄, би тӏӯъ ә̄шо̄ икӏвэ ттӏытӏкьи.


When you're doing nothing but pouring concrete outside of these office buildings all day, how much you care about precision depends on whether you're getting overtime pay.
Hold the reins steady, or you'll confuse the horse.




Дажылс кӏуәс тӏыъгэ̄с гъайбисиндэ ынвә̄м ә̄шо̄еэс ттӏәлинтӏмай?
Ик хъинкӏалыс даттӏа̄ндэ ттӏынинтӏ гьу уъртӏ әдсәнтӏытӏ пӏӯв сә̄нӣэ̄, ттым двиъчӏ сә̄нӣэ̄ ик уъртӏ двиъсәнттӏ ни хъинкӏал итӏэр буъкк хәзэ̄ми милиътӏкъарӏэ̄с диркӏды.


What kind of monster puts sewing needles in random people's pillows?
One moment I put the hingalsh on the windowsill and turn around, the next I turn back to see no hingalsh but a goat with pumpkin on its fur.




Ми әдә̄нинигъ нусис мәс нидвиъсәнтӏитӏиъкьи әвшэ̄ эрчӏ, ым иснэ̄нӣ би арбиъэхъ тә̄нтӏиъыъма?
Подкәст дыкӏтӏуъ гьәфтэ двитӏӣъэ̄, сәэ мавдӯъсы тӏэ̄лерәш нә̄ъм Ихтилә̄линсы Туркэ̄м Тӏәрнә̄м гьу синтӏухъиндэчӏсы До̄лэ̄с Уъсма̄неэ̄с гӯънтӏиъ.


I might not be back early enough from my daughter-in-law's appointment, will Monday or Wednesday work?
Tune into the podcast next week, when the topic of our episode will be the Young Turk Revolution and the dissolution of the Ottoman Empire.




А̄сма̄н аяр ттӏӣре эвпӏә̄въкӏ сә кӏӣчӏимбыд хин әттӏ цӏиръ, фото абойсы чилифонэ мэ̄ фачербыд быъганцӏкьи опӏтӏуъухъ.
Ик әйнәк митиъ икми нибәртӏ пӏәччӏ эвмәс ю̄ъсәд вә̄нд менюӣ якӏтӏуъ.
 
I don't have my glasses on me so can one of you read out the menu?
 
 
Гӯ тӏәсы о̄минсы ыъттӏ хин сәвс, дживанс милтырг мэ̄ бӣънтӏ нӯъ.
 
It must be especially dry today, the couch just shocked me.
 
 
Ыг сәкт кӏэ̄ртиъ тӏо хусырӣъ опӏтӏә; записач ккӏа тӏӯъ сигар инэйәмтӏ та̄нтӏ, тӏӯъ вит акӏитӏиъ ю̄ътӏ тӏиркӏтӏ пӏы хвәз двиъдиркӏчӏэ икдэ би гима̄хдэ ниттӏәлтӏссә.
 
Your heart attack was caused by a blood clot; your records say you smoke, that needs to change if you don't soon want another visit to me or your grave.


The clear, slightly starry sky at this time of evening is so beautiful, mind taking a photo so I can use it as a wallpaper for my phone once we're to the apartment?


Гӯ тӏәм кӏэссинер еккинэ диркӏытӏ сэ̄ гъәдэ̄ пӏәччӏ бодж ыъсәнцӏэ̄тиъ о̄мигъ әгәсигъ тә̄тӏ накӏтӏ, вин ма̄шӣнӣъ ләбэ̄с зыбирижэниэ̄биъ нә̄ъм мукӏэ ниуъпӏитӏиъкьи.


Ыг ыб ы̄в дәккӏәнәд синтӏцы икъӏэцӏ гьу Дэнизс гьәссә̄рэ̄ тӏыпӏәс вит ка̄гъ бырэдж сәъндӯкъми епениъми ыптӏисы дуъсыгъ вә̄ндӣъ тӏэ̄мәд уъппыдсытӏытӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ иък комбинацыӣъ догъэ̄с жавабсы якӏатӏ кӏукэрп.
He found a grey hair in his comb this morning so he's been in an existential panic off and on all day, hopefully he doesn't spend our savings on a sports car tomorrow.


It was raining when we left the store and Deniz, clumsy as usual, dropped the little paper that came with the brand new safe so it got too wet to read the instructions, but he guessed the lock combination and somehow got it right.


Гьәърӣфыс кәм Товарищ Сааховдэ әлутэ гьу футболӣ синтӏәнтӏиъ нокӏтӏэ̄, тӏӯъ нә̄ъми синтӏитӏиъмай би гӯътӏиъмай мәшгъӯл?


Ик ябочк сә аштӏэхъ бы̄ънтӏ ачӏ, оккӏ митиъ чинчинӣ зәнгэ̄с зәб туъригъ синтӏцы имды.
Some coworkers are going to Товарищ Саахов tonight for beers and football, are you coming with or are you busy?


I almost got a bullseye with that dart, but got distracted by the bell jingling when a customer came through the door.


Свичир ыъндэбәвкӏтӏчӏэ ыъттӏмай тӏипӏ эвпӏә̄въкӏ?


Гӯ пицца лыъктӏрэ̄быд кӏәръубэ̄с тӏанрисс иттӏытӏ пӏокӏтӏ сиппӏ, пӏәччӏ тӏэ̄мс нибӣъды гьәмәтӏ мацордӣъ тӏипӏисәс упӏчӏәш ӣхды, гьу фәшилппӏәд тырулъэ̄сы пӏэ̄т кәм ппӏымуъпӏтӏэ ттӏилды.
Isn't it a bit warm to be wearing a sweater?


The pizza was almost done cooking when a storm took the power out, so they left it alone hoping the residual heat would do the job, and when that failed they got oldschool putting some tinder under the oven.


Ик, Зә̄мә̄ччӏэ̄ Васыфкӏырс, сә чӏиръырг Васыфӣ Арахгъулӣъ виркӏтӏ; ми ю̄ъс тӏотӏэ биврэс дык гӯйминтиъ нивӣдыъкьичӏәш вэцӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ ик вәл кӏә̄мими пӏыътӏръис мәс нипӏитт дыквэхъ Рӯсиэ̄с нибӣъды имытӏ.


Кӏо гьӣсәр нохчиътиъ агъбыд мәӏзӯнӣәд ӣтӏ агь агинэ гӣнттәш тӏәш диркӏды, нэ̄бисы гӣнттәми вә̄лидыми тӏәшә̄м тӏэ̄нинтӏ мин ю̄ътӏ хин ыъттӏкьи ръаме.
This eulogy by me, Zamacch Wasyfkyr, is dedicated to Wasyf Arakhghul; I know many of you in the audience may not speak Guimin, but I chose by my father's wishes not to write it in Russian.


I heard that a Chechen family right on the border got back from their vacation to find a bear in their baby's crib; fortunately the baby was with their parents but still it must've been terrifying.


Бәлэ ыг сә пырайгрывачил бәлккӯъттӏ двиъбэ̄тӏ двиъбэ̄тӏ тэ̄нтӏ иначӏ, вәт әлил синттӏуъухъ са̄дэ̄ гӯъды вис.


Катуъсы сәм ръакӏыргэ̄сы агэ̄сы ләйктӏ настолыъндэ э̄тӏыъ, чӯниъ торт ӣруъпӏтӏ итӏэрдэ холодилникәсыыъндэ ттӏилитӏиъкьи такэ̄.
Yeah that piece of shit record player gets stuck repeating a lot, just adjust the needle and it'll be fine.
 
 
Our cat's a greedy little shit and can jump onto the counter, once the cake's finished I'd put it somewhere else like on top of the fridge.
 
 
Ик ничӏ ка̄гъитиъ би итӏэр тӏәмӣ нипӏиттәш номирис мәс дыкӏитӏиъ имды, уъртӏ быдсәнттӏәкьи зәмэ̄ угь.
 
 
Сӯъюъс мәс валг цэ̄вэ̄тиъ ёргъдэ ттӏәлытӏухъ мин ю̄ътӏ булашма̄шӣнэ̄сы бингэ̄сы ми ландроматӏӣ тӣды мукӏэ̄, виттӏиъм би итӏэрә̄с тӏвитиъ тӣцы вәргрәма ла̄втӏ ю̄ътӏ?
I'll find a piece of paper or something to write my number on, feel free to call anytime.
 
 
My son spilled apple juice on the blanket, but the washing machine's broken so I'll be going to the laundromat tomorrow; while I'm there do y'all have clothes or anything that need to be washed?
 
 
Тӏӯъ дуракӏ Уъсма̄нми тӣтӏиъссә мӣ дәъякъ гьарацытиъ тӏәминдэ упӏтӏуъ, ыг сӯъюъс фа̄йшэ̄с гъәшш бы̄ътӏ та̄тӏ.
 
 
Гӯ мы̄ъс бюруътиъ емыр астыгъерәсы мәс нимустахтерэ возмещениэхъ нимигъәсы вӣдытӏухъ, гьу какмәсәр синтӏыъды нию̄ътӏ динэрдәм тӣды; бидәсы морозилникәсы хин тӏәсыэ ми синтӏды нию̄ътӏ воткӏэхъ даехъ нэкӏды бухай.
If you ever play Durak with Osman don't bet money on it, the son of a bitch cheats.
 
 
О̄ тӏви виъсмисәс ппӏыдкӏукӏтӏгьэ дуъсыгъэ̄, э̄н сә̄нӣигъ тыътӏуъухъ ик кад къагьуътиъ тӏэ̄ дӯды снитӏцы.
 
Oh you worry about everyone too much, relax for a bit while I get you a cup of coffee.
 
 
Ми мытӏәд ракъинӣ чилифонәш имды вэцӏухъ, набирач быъкӏтӏуъ сә 872, 3- ни, минтӏуъ.
 
I think I remember the phone number, dial 872, 3- no, wait.
 
 
Ик тӏаблэтӏкӏэ̄с мелатонинитиъ чӏӯниъ вайл ттӏилды тита̄тӏә̄й суъп сәттӏә̄й нӯъ.
 
If I'd taken melatonin when I was planning to I'd be sleeping now.
 
 
Джо̄ттӏ, тӏӯъ дәккӏән пӏы̄инигъ имцы, мадзанг, кӏэкӏикӏ, мил ражиътиъ нә̄с е мигъә̄с мәнтӏиъыъма?
 
Dear, while you're out shopping in the city, can you get us more oregano, thyme, and garlic powder?
 
 
Ыг тӏви игзамәд римытӏ фәшил пӏәччӏ руъхс ра̄нәнэ̄тиъ тӏэ̄ нидо̄тӏыъ, мин ю̄ътӏ тӏӯъ кӏо̄ш двиъбы̄ъйтӏиъыъ ттымппӏыд.
 
You failed the test so we can't give you a driving license, but you can try again later.
 
 
Кӏу виргәс миъгь нитытӏуъ мин ю̄ътӏ джәримэ̄сы мя̄нджӣс джуъгьэ̄сы 6%әсы.
 
The job doesn't come with a salary but the standard commission is 6%.
 
 
Кӏо Нӯрс комисён ботыләд угь вин дӯды йәмтӏ, пӏәччӏ ю̄ъс вин уъпӏитӏиъссә тӏә̄мигъ уъпӏтӏуъ.
 
Noor makes commission on every bottle she sells, so if you're going to buy it buy it from her.
 
 
Вӣ гъё̄м сыменэсигъ лоришэ̄сы тита̄тӏ ыг ниәттыәсы, ик гьәмәтӏ тӏӯъ суъп ниттӏилтӏчӏэ джо̄ш вә̄мтӏ.
 
We've worked shifts as nurses and it isn't easy, I hope you don't like sleep.
 
 
Ягья вит ми виъсмисӣ икми кӏыъркӏыъерә̄м вӣдытӏ, угьмәс жаваб суӏә̄лнӣ тӏо бэ̄тӏыъссә тӏәм тэ̄нтӏссә.
 
Yahya taught me everything I know about smithing, if anyone can answer your question it's him.
 
 
Футболчӏа̄сәр кирмиънәс мәс кӯълъ Акиллэ̄стиъ сәтиъ мытӏ руън нӯъ, ахъ.
 
My favorite footballer just tore his Achilles tendon, ouch.
 
 
Ра̄нәнэ̄ тәкъа̄з кьӏәвыс дуърәчӏитиъ иба̄тӏ то̄къӣфрэ̄ тӏәш, кӏу муъӏа̄фәсы икӏ бәвгчӏәд мәттӏәсәд руъхсэ̄ми ра̄нәнэ̄с мәттӏэ̄ми ничӏисы ка̄гъәш «i can drive lit gang» екӏды
 
The driver was demanding for his keys back before he was arrested, claiming to be exempt from drunk driving with a drunk driving certificate that was a piece of paper that read "i can drive lit gang"
 
 
Ыг пырезидент олигархәми сидинтӏ олур е хэнэ̄ш о̄мо̄м нер вит ничӏигьды гы̄рэ̄, кӏу сәмисы Америкэ.
 
The president and his oligarchs are ruling with more open evil by the day and nothing's being substantially done about it, I hear it's the same in America.
 
 
Ниъза̄м ной тӏымәд мӣнис нэкӏитӏиъ рог, ик насӣъгь джа̄г итӏэр ссы̄нәс би итӏэрм кӏвә̄н тӏвитиъ бырәнцӏәш екӏчӏ до̄тӏ.
 
The new policy will go into effect at the end of the month, I suggest finding either somewhere else to live or someone else to take care of your dog.
 
 
Ик чай воркӏтӏкьи, мин ю̄ътӏ сизгэдж хин никкӏутӏгьэыъ.
 
I was going to make some tea, but I can't find the strainer anywhere.
 
 
Вӣ зо̄пӏаркӏдэ фотоэ̄с сиънкэсәд гьу зебырэ̄сәд упӏды синтӏәнтӏиъкьима?
 
Can we go to the zoo to take pictures of the leopards and zebras?
 
 
Ыг матӏор пәнджәрэ̄тиъ ппӏыдримтӏә ю̄ътӏ, гьу нә̄ъ эттэ̄л руктӏ атылеинэ нитытӏ, ик гьар ыъкӏэтӏиъ кьима нӯъ?
 
Looks like the window motor needs to be replaced, but we don't have the right part in the shop, want me to order it now?
 
 
Ми кӏуэ тӏӯъ зәм тӏәминэ кӏурсинэ әдӣхатӏ нивӣцӏ сә тӏви нерәш ниекӏатӏ цӏә̄ттӏ ппё.
 
I don't know why you wasted time on that class when clearly it didn't teach you anything.
 
 
Гӯкьӏэ мӣ вэ̄чӏ бы̄ътӏуъ, сә пӏәвиъцӏуъ са̄дэ̄, гӯ тӏәсы хырччанәсы э̄ррэ̄ анккьӏ гьу мух сәтиъ ырә бырэдж.
 
Don't bother arguing and just ignore him, he's in a bad mood because his hours and pay got reduced.
 
 
Ыг тӏәмс каркарыс лулыргэ̄м пыластикис гьу кӏәчӏәпӏвә̄м иппэнтӏкьи, гьашерәми, ми ниукӏокӏтӏ бӯч.
 
They were shouting something about plastic straws and turtles I think, honestly I wasn't paying attention.
 
 
Ик вә̄нд китә̄бинӣ дарсис дәркӏытӏ кӏу я̄къӯтэ̄сы гьу шапюлэ̄сы гьашерәми нәвъсы ыъкӏмнис хханәш сәмәсы багэ̄ми итӏэрэ̄ми.
 
I read in a textbook that rubies and sapphires are actually the same kind of gem with different impurities.
 
 
Шутӏкӏэ̄сы дыквэхъ Англиэ̄с нимы баскетболчӏа̄ръис гьуцӏро̄әш LeBron James гьу баръӣс «йәппӏ голл быронзэ̄тиъ» о̄с ккӏӯнәс пӏы га̄йтӏ.
 
The joke is that in English the name of the famous basketball player LeBron James and the words for "bronzen jade" sound similar.
 
 
Цӏаттӏ хин двиъбыъга̄нәсыъ сәнчӏ тӏәд мәъдинәд ытӏә мӣлә̄дрэ̄ быъкӏтӏәды нӯъ о̄мэ̄.
 
Э̄ тӏви кӏу чӏӯниъ кӏа̄нәс цӏаттӏис 78 Volvo-инэ пӏыгъанәсинэ мәс я̄рукъ нэкӏды чӏӯниъ нәккӏ джонтӏӣъ кӏа̄нәш бӣъды Ea-nāṣir-әсы найдеәсы двиъгӯънинтӏ гьашэ̄? Сӯъй фа̄йшэ̄тиъ.
 
Copper is so recyclable that stuff that was mined pre BC is still being used today.
 
So what you're telling me is that when the copper head in my old 78 Volvo cracked when it blew the head gasket it was actually Ea-nāṣir's fault again? That son of a bitch.
 
 
Ик званич муъгьа̄сибӣ мәс ым мәӏзӯнӣәд синтӏчӏппӏәд ыъкӏэтӏиъ такэ̄.
 
I should call my accountant once we're back from vacation.
 
 
Гӯ дакьчӏа̄сәр дэпӏынәм кӏарамелӣтиъ гьу ирисытиъ ттӏилинтӏ, тӏви лэфт тӏӯъми имды синтӏигъцы мэкӏтӏэбппӏээ̄ гӯътӏиъкьи вис.
 
The confectioner has a sale on caramel and fudge, it might be worth bringing change for when you walk by him after school.
 
 
Йырсы уът кӏэ̄р сив ккӏонцӏисы бэкярмәс тӏэ̄мәс диндэ ппа̄нәс ппа̄нәс гӯътӏ.
 
It's a traditional courtship song often sung by bachelors on their way home.
 
 
Тӏә̄м висм тәъминӣ кәм, ик нивиъцӏ кӏыриъччэ̄, нәгнә̄м йәвисәс нитэ̄нтӏә.
 
There's something about the taste of barley bread that she doesn't like, I'm not sure what it is.
 
 
Ик сә пӏәшшӯр ё̄итиъ пӏыгъан мәзә̄дӣъ успрэ̄д мытӏ бәстигъэ̄, тӏӯъ игъсинтӏди нэкӏды двитӏӣъэ̄ митӏиъкьи.
 
I got this worn out yew table at an auction last week as part of a package deal, you can take it next time you stop by.
 
 
Бы̄ъкьӏәш биъхходисәс артинкбыд вӣдухъчӏрэ̄, губа̄р ккӏиккьӏипэ̄тиъ ё̄рӣ гӯъбыдчӏәсы бинкуъсы ё̄гуъсы дэбы̄ътӏуъ.
 
Before you worry about the exact shape of the end product, pound the steel billet out on the anvil until it has a uniform thickness.
 
 
Тӏви мытӏәд вӣ кьы̄тэ̄с аккю̄тәмтиъ харэкӏрэ̄ биппэнтӏзәмчӏә̄м ибәйнтӏ нукӏтӏигъ хин әмтӏма?
 
Do you remember when we used to take turns telling ghost stories by the campfire way too late into the night?
 
 
Къутиъс двә̄ виъгьы дикӏы атӏашыс мэ̄ тынтӏ двә̄ виъгьы нон имцы ю̄ътӏ, ик пәррикъ мацордӣъ имитӏиъмай эв хин атӏаш гӯъә̄йды ю̄ътӏ ды̄ъ әдӣхэтӏиъмай?
 
The box had fifty paperclips but I only needed forty-nine, should I save the last one on the off chance I'll need just one paperclip at some point or should I throw it away?
 
 
Ми би джудзӣъ дәркӏтӏ гьу гьәмәтӏ сәнчӏ бивр дыкӏәнтӏиъчӏәш эхэтӏиъ, а̄гъ мукӏэ, сәмкӏӯъ вис гьәфтэ, пӏыъкчӏ йә̄рэ гаютӏиъкьи.
 
I look at myself in the mirror and hope to see many things, tomorrow a homeowner, next week a good neighbor, next year maybe a wife.
 
 
Гӯ гьэ̄рӣэ̄сы иъркъми кирмиъними бо̄шшә̄м ынуъмәс гьәъсә̄сӣеәмәс миләд дӯнтӏчӏәмтиъ әсинтӏ.
 
I've heard irises are one of the best kinds of flowers to get people who are allergic to pollen.
 
 
Мигъер виъсәмтиъ кӏирръә̄м ӏинсә̄нмәс истисынэ̄сы гы̄рвэ̄сы энтвидачиъсы нигӯътӏ къэрыме.
 
Most spiders' venoms aren't dangerous to humans, a notable exception being black widows.
 
 
Ыг вӣцӏ гар, мин ю̄ътӏ кӏу сәрэ̄ерәсы эстетикэ̄сы пӏалтӏ пӏыгъан голл сәтиъ ниимыъды ной вэ̄ыъндэбыъкӏтӏ.
 
He knows it's cold out, but apparently that's outweighed by aesthetics since he refuses to wear his old green coat when we can't afford a new one.
 
 
Бибәшшэ̄д ик СМС ся̄гь әдсәнтӏытӏчӏрэ̄ упӏды еркӏи бы̄ътӏ нӯъ, ыг вӣ бәццарэ̄с, ӯныс, ы̄ъйәм ба̄за̄рэхъ имцы быринтӏ вә̄й.
 
Sorry for texting now instead of making a list before you left, but while you're at the market, we're running low on peppers, flour, and eggs.
 
 
Тӏӯъ къӏэн би виъз мәссәлэ̄сы екӏды шшошш бӣъцы ниәттӏ мин ю̄ътӏ Дорожнаяәсы вәләсы къӏэнисәс бәч висуъсы нигӯътӏкьи.
 
It's not a problem that you sing or whistle when you're sweeping, but Дорожная may not be the best choice of song.
 
 
Ик сә гикь кӏо̄ш барбекюӣ гьашисӣ гьвинабисӣ упӏды бӣъчӏэ мытӏ чӏӯниъ доттагъыс Америкеәм митиъ дэсинтӏды, кӏу мин ю̄ътӏ пӏэкк тӣчӏәс тӏәшә̄м гух виръбыд әвшбыд уъпӏытӏ нӯъ.
 
I got this garlic string to try to make an authentic sweet barbecue when my American buddies visit, but their flight was just postponed to early spring.
 
 
Пӏырӣъмин мәс тарӣф ныроджерәсы гьиджә̄ӏис «да̄р» милзәмэ̄ми «да̄рч» тирды дәркӏытӏ жакъ, гьу ик мәфф ах сытрӣмӣ сәм ттӏилитӏиъчӏәтиъ пӏокӏтӏ жакъ эппӏэ̄ вӣцӏ.
 
My partner saw a recipe today that had "gunpowder" in the ingredients as a typo of "cinnamon," and I have a terrible idea for what I'm going to cook on our stream later today.
 
 
Ым е̄нәсы Унсоколодэ сәнчӏэ̄с сӯъсӣъ игъдӯды тӏукӏисы ивэдинтӏухъ, бәлк жәнгтиъ митиъ шәдэ сәэ пырём нидиркӏды акӏытӏчӏбыд мир, гьу афтӏастӏопӏппӏэ сәбыд жул игъӣхухъкьиды кор дыкӏнинтӏ.
 
We thought it'd be a quick trip to Untsukul to drop stuff off for grandma, until our hunk of rust died in the mountains where we couldn't get signal, and we noticed after hitchhiking the rest of the way that we must've lost the broom somewhere along the way.
 
 
Вайл сэ̄ зэ̄нд ккӏы упӏды ной вит джискачэкӏ нэкӏды ттӏытӏ; ккӏо̄ гьу ракъ со эвеэ̄с виргәсы хин ю̄ътӏисы дәркӏрә.
 
There are plans to renovate this condemned prison and turn it into a nightclub; the front and left side in particular look like they'll need a lot of work.
 
 
Ми әълӣлмитми ма̄кисәс кәм тӏыънәнцӏ, гьукӯмэ̄ кӏадг ы̄витиъ хуйсы хин дӯды чӏиъгьытӏ ппёэ̄, чӏӯниъ сә̄нӣбыд нә̄ъсы ӏә̄лэ̄сы вит нэкӏчӏәш мир тӣды чӏигьды.
 
Meeting some of my fellow casualties from the war, it's clear the government stopped giving a single shit about us the moment we stopped being a tool for murder.
 
 
Пӏырәппыъуъсы виъсэ̄ мигъерәм сәэ кӏокӏунтӏчӏәсы, мин ю̄ътӏ сәм кьӏачӏәсы эвпӏә̄въкӏ ик постппӏыд Лацину-әш диркӏды
 
It's always great to see more here, but also kinda funny that I saw this right after the Latsinu post
 
 
Ик кӏокӏтӏ апӏтӏ банджарәм ареинэ тӏо ё̄минсы руктӏәсы нэкӏды гьа̄дэсэ̄ са̄дэ̄ гьиджә̄ӏ «Къвичэ̄сы Уъсма̄нгъулсы кьӏэхъчӏа̄сысы» ыънәддиркӏды бӣънтӏ нибагеэ̄.
 
I find it unlikely that the herbs in your field just accidentally grew in the right pattern to perfectly spell "Qwich Usmanghul is an asshole" when seen from above.
 
 
Чӏӯниъ тӣды нер итӏэрэ̄ кьӏӯтӏ о̄мигъ битӏонӣ бо̄дэ сә ттымнис офисис дӯды, кӏадг биъхходерәш акӏтӏәчӏәсы чӏӯ мух свирхурочәш акӏтӏәчӏәсы нэкӏтӏ тӏиркӏтӏ.
 
When you're doing nothing but pouring concrete outside of these office buildings all day, how much you care about precision depends on whether you're getting overtime pay.
 
 
Дажылс кӏуәс тӏыъгэ̄с гъайбисиндэ ынвә̄м ә̄шо̄еэс ттӏәлинтӏмай?
 
What kind of monster puts sewing needles in random people's pillows?
 
 
Ми әдә̄нинигъ нусис мәс нидвиъсәнтӏитӏиъкьи әвшэ̄ эрчӏ, ым иснэ̄нӣ би арбиъэхъ тә̄нтӏиъыъма?
 
I might not be back early enough from my daughter-in-law's appointment, will Monday or Wednesday work?
 
 
А̄сма̄н аяр ттӏӣре эвпӏә̄въкӏ сә кӏӣчӏимбыд хин әттӏ цӏиръ, фото абойсы чилифонэ мэ̄ фачербыд быъганцӏкьи опӏтӏуъухъ.
 
The clear, slightly starry sky at this time of evening is so beautiful, mind taking a photo so I can use it as a wallpaper for my phone once we're to the apartment?
 
 
Ыг ыб ы̄в дәккӏәнәд синтӏцы икъӏэцӏ гьу Дэнизс гьәссә̄рэ̄ тӏыпӏәс вит ка̄гъ бырэдж сәъндӯкъми епениъми ыптӏисы дуъсыгъ вә̄ндӣъ тӏэ̄мәд уъппыдсытӏытӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ иък комбинацыӣъ догъэ̄с жавабсы якӏатӏ кӏукэрп.
 
It was raining when we left the store and Deniz, clumsy as usual, dropped the little paper that came with the brand new safe so it got too wet to read the instructions, but he guessed the lock combination and somehow got it right.
 
 
Ик ябочк сә аштӏэхъ бы̄ънтӏ ачӏ, оккӏ митиъ чинчинӣ зәнгэ̄с зәб туъригъ синтӏцы имды.
 
I almost got a bullseye with that dart, but got distracted by the bell jingling when a customer came through the door.
 
 
Гӯ пицца лыъктӏрэ̄быд кӏәръубэ̄с тӏанрисс иттӏытӏ пӏокӏтӏ сиппӏ, пӏәччӏ тӏэ̄мс нибӣъды гьәмәтӏ мацордӣъ тӏипӏисәс упӏчӏәш ӣхды, гьу фәшилппӏәд тырулъэ̄сы пӏэ̄т кәм ппӏымуъпӏтӏэ ттӏилды.
 
The pizza was almost done cooking when a storm took the power out, so they left it alone hoping the residual heat would do the job, and when that failed they got oldschool putting some tinder under the oven.
 
 
Кӏо гьӣсәр нохчиътиъ агъбыд мәӏзӯнӣәд ӣтӏ агь агинэ гӣнттәш тӏәш диркӏды, нэ̄бисы гӣнттәми вә̄лидыми тӏәшә̄м тӏэ̄нинтӏ мин ю̄ътӏ хин ыъттӏкьи ръаме.
 
I heard that a Chechen family right on the border got back from their vacation to find a bear in their baby's crib; fortunately the baby was with their parents but still it must've been terrifying.
 
 
Катуъсы сәм ръакӏыргэ̄сы агэ̄сы ләйктӏ настолыъндэ э̄тӏыъ, чӯниъ торт ӣруъпӏтӏ итӏэрдэ холодилникәсыыъндэ ттӏилитӏиъкьи такэ̄.
 
Our cat's a greedy little shit and can jump onto the counter, once the cake's finished I'd put it somewhere else like on top of the fridge.
 
 
Сӯъюъс мәс валг цэ̄вэ̄тиъ ёргъдэ ттӏәлытӏухъ мин ю̄ътӏ булашма̄шӣнэ̄сы бингэ̄сы ми ландроматӏӣ тӣды мукӏэ̄, виттӏиъм би итӏэрә̄с тӏвитиъ тӣцы вәргрәма ла̄втӏ ю̄ътӏ?
 
My son spilled apple juice on the blanket, but the washing machine's broken so I'll be going to the laundromat tomorrow; while I'm there do y'all have clothes or anything that need to be washed?
 
 
Гӯ мы̄ъс бюруътиъ емыр астыгъерәсы мәс нимустахтерэ возмещениэхъ нимигъәсы вӣдытӏухъ, гьу какмәсәр синтӏыъды нию̄ътӏ динэрдәм тӣды; бидәсы морозилникәсы хин тӏәсыэ ми синтӏды нию̄ътӏ воткӏэхъ даехъ нэкӏды бухай.
 
Some idiot bureaucrat thought my disability isn't relevant enough to my unemployment for compensation, and you don't need to be able to walk to fix rooves; luckily the freezer's right here so I won't need to walk to get shitfaced on cheap vodka.
 
 
Мәън хин бокшор ри гӯъкьиды ёгъ имтӏ мин ю̄ътӏ къэрымсы бәч мигъисы укӏинӣ тӏәш гьу кӏэлмисӣ виъсмисә̄м итӏэрә̄м, вышыбалэ̄сы бо̄дэ ттӏилчӏә̄ иттӏыъкьима вәг?
 
It makes sense that a rich boxer of all people would be coarse but this is too big a risk both for his liver and for the safety of everyone else here, do you think the bouncer is tough enough to get him outside?
 
 
А̄брэ̄з рут тӏӯъ мӣккьӏ сә ытвӣ двиъчӏ пӏуншәсы упӏссәды быъкӏтӏуъ, кьә̄вкӏ кӏӣчӏыргӣъ нукӏтӏис гӯътӏә бёх.
 
If you're going to mix that wine into another punch use the red pitcher, the blue one's dirty from last night's party.
 
 
Тӏырӣ ю̄ъс а̄тӏмырг ареэ макъис тӣтӏиъкьичӏрэ̄д, гьар руъхсэ̄тиъ а̄гъӣъ ыъкӏтӏуъ суъминэ̄.
 
Before you three play hide-and-seek in the wheat field, ask the owner nicely for permission.
 
 
Егъи банкигъ ӣътӏ о̄мэ̄ бёчч бырэдж тидж инигъдиркӏцы, сӯър тӏәттиъ диркӏитӏиъкьима?
 
Yeghi went to the bank today and on the way he saw a cute little bug, wanna see a picture of it?
 
 
Эв висмисы о̄ста̄д та̄рӣхтиъ пӏыгъан митиъ ик вӣдды вӣдцы екӏды кӏу «Ба̄жэ̄сы әхха̄зиъсы са̄дэ̄ мафиӣъ тофәнгиппиъ ФСНПәш»; ккӏа тӏәсы зэ̄ндинэ нӯъ гъәшш гьу сытол тыънинтӏчӏэ мин ю̄ътӏ ыъттӏ ясӣр.
 
One thing my old history teacher said that always stuck with me is "Taxes are just mafia extortion with FSNP guns"; now I hear he's in prison for fraud and possession of an illegal firearm but that's not important.
 
 
Ахла̄къ ресторанэсэ бә̄йъспэсэ мэ̄ вэцӏәухъ тә̄тӏә ытэ̄л; нивӣцӏ кӏу вӣър къэза̄лӣ бәвгды би кӏу вӣър пӏа̄ккӏ кӏэнкьичӏрэ̄быд минды ниекӏцы, хвәз са̄дэ̄ ша̄мӣъ ттӏил джо̄ш әдсинтӏды.
 
Etiquette at fancy restaurants has never really been my thing; I don't know which spoon to use for caviar or which guy to wait on to shut up before I can start eating, I just want to enjoy dinner and leave.
 
 
Аккрывашк хуй вис нэ̄чӏэ шын автобустиъ упӏды гаютӏиъмай, аччӏа̄сәр быдытӏуъ гьу эвм мәгьәми игъимцы.
 
The fuck good is a can opener gonna do to fix a bus tire? Go get a wrench and while you're at it someone with a brain.
 
 
Вӣ ба̄зырниъм микравалнофкӣъ корӣъ нибыдимәнтӏиъухъ такэ̄; ик хвәз абдалтиъ «микравалнофк Ццизуътӏитиъ әмытӏгьэкьи» ка̄гъдэ ттӏилды ттӏәлтӏә̄й мил картачекинэ ыънэимды, битӏ гьарац әдӣхцы гьу вит мәнвис пӏәримгьэцы е пӏә̄въкӏ та̄нтӏә̄й.
 
We shouldn't get the pigs involved over a lost microwave; if I wanted an idiot to put "Tsizut's microwave was maybe stolen" on a piece of paper to collect dust in a filing cabinet, I'd do it myself wasting less money and harassing fewer people.
 
 
Ик бирн мэтӏалтиъ киръӣ варжигъ о̄мо̄м тӣцы бӣънтӏ, бушэ̄р я̄рукъе гьу шуӏӯър әхӯм эррэ мәс бәринтӏ нӯъ.
 
I hit my hand on a metal weight during daily exercise, now I have a cracked cuticle and a weird feeling in my knuckle.
 
 
Зәмрэ̄быд висрэ̄быд пӏыгъанрэ̄быд, ынвис ашыкӏыс вэллръә̄м зарсы гьу вэ̄йыргэ̄с екксы кәмбәш ибо̄гэнтӏ.
 
Back in the good old days, people used sheep knucklebones as dice and sticks as toothbrushes.
 
 
Ик тӏэ̄ сә айскрӣм чокӏолатӏтиъ ба̄луътиъ гьар екӏды быдмытӏ, ик е̄мырг ттитӏиъухъкьима?
 
I got you that chocolate cherry ice cream you asked for, mind if I try a little?
 
 
Нидвиъыъмбыдццӏимәнтӏиъзәмыъкьима?
 
Might they and she not be able to take it back to each other over her (and stop at that point)?
 
==Multiple sentences==
Тӏӯъ виъс кӏу та̄тӏ сә о̄минэ? Записач митӏ кӏо̄ш бибы̄ътӏ акӏтӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ сиръә фәшил нӯъдэ
 
What are y'all up to? I've been trying to record myself, but so far have failed
 
 
Ы̄в ачкӣсэ тӏо кӏуә̄мэ вэ̄ вӣдинтӏ. Тӏӯъ чимадан тӏвитиъ синтӏчӏрэ̄д сәм диркӏытӏма кӏыриъчч?
 
We have no clue where your glasses are. Did you check your suitcase before we left?
 
==Dialogs==
1: Ик лоб тӏәшӣъ цацкӣъ тәртӏ, ми әмитӏиъыъма?
2: Ни, гӯ сә итӏэрм быъкӏтӏәкьи, гьу гӯътӏиъкьи е дуъттӏо̄ нидыкӏтӏәгьэыъссә.
1: А̄а̄а̄ мин ю̄ътӏ ик лоб тәртӏ хин хин хин.
2: Би рәмтӏуъ, кӏо̄ш бәянтӏиъухъ цацк тӏэ̄ тырәнцӏгьэ виъкӏинигъ двитӏӣъинигъ энтӏцы.
1: Вашэ̄!
 
1: "I want that toy, can I take it?"
2: "No, it may belong to someone else, and they would be very sad if they couldn't find it."
1: "Awww but I really really really want it."
2: "Settle down, we'll see about getting you a toy on the way through the next village."
1: "Yay!"


Some idiot bureaucrat thought my disability isn't relevant enough to my unemployment for compensation, and you don't need to be able to walk to fix rooves; luckily the freezer's right here so I won't need to walk to get shitfaced on cheap vodka.


==Multiple sentences==
«Сәшшид, Америкчӏа̄сәрыс гьукӯмэ̄сы сәм нитӏигъвэ̄сы бэ̄нтӏ.»
Тӏӯъ виъс кӏу та̄тӏ сә о̄минэ? Записач митӏ кӏо̄ш бибы̄ътӏ акӏтӏ, мин ю̄ътӏ сиръә фәшил нӯъдэ


What are y'all up to? I've been trying to record myself, but so far have failed
«Ажан тӏэ̄мәс екӏды диркӏтӏуъгьэ гьу отпускӣ нимухми тӣтӏуъ.»


"Sir, the Americans are saying our government's incompetent."


Ы̄в ачкӣсэ тӏо кӏуә̄мэ вэ̄ вӣдинтӏ. Тӏӯъ чимадан тӏвитиъ синтӏчӏрэ̄д сәм диркӏытӏма кӏыриъчч?
"Find the spy that told them and put him on unpaid leave."
 
We have no clue where your glasses are. Did you check your suitcase before we left?
 
==Dialogs==
1: Ик лоб тӏәшӣъ цацкӣъ тәртӏ, ми әмитӏиъыъма?
2: Ни, гӯ сә итӏэрм быъкӏтӏәкьи, гьу гӯътӏиъкьи е дуъттӏо̄ нидыкӏтӏәгьэыъссә.
1: А̄а̄а̄ мин ю̄ътӏ ик лоб тәртӏ хин хин хин.
2: Би рәмтӏуъ, кӏо̄ш бәянтӏиъухъ цацк тӏэ̄ тырәнцӏгьэ виъкӏинигъ двитӏӣъинигъ энтӏцы.
1: Вашэ̄!
 
1: "I want that toy, can I take it?"
2: "No, it may belong to someone else, and they would be very sad if they couldn't find it."
1: "Awww but I really really really want it."
2: "Settle down, we'll see about getting you a toy on the way through the next village."
1: "Yay!"


==Longer texts==
==Longer texts==